You Can't Go Home Again (27 page)

He licked again, flicking his tongue against her sensitive
little nub, feeling her thighs tighten and squeeze against his face and neck.
He thrust against the bed again, groaning against her sex.

He moaned against her, causing a hum against her already
aching clitoris. She was so close to release, her body so tight it seemed she’d
snap at any second. When his tongue thrust inside her she screamed out, on the
verge of orgasm.

And he stopped.

He sat back on his heels again, watching as she twisted and
writhed against the bed. When he saw her hand stray down her belly, he stopped
her before she could even graze her sex.

“No…don’t you dare.”

Her eyes flashed open, glazed with need.

“You’re mine tonight. You’ll come when I let you.”

He kept her that way, on the edge, never letting her find
release. He used his mouth and fingers to bring her right to the brink,
stopping just before she fell over into the abyss. Three more times.

When he saw her writhing on the bed, her breathing short and
labored, little whimpers that bordered on pain slipping through her lips, he
knew she was getting close.

“What do you want, Dani?”

She moaned again in answer.

“Do you want me inside you?”

She twisted her hips, writhing against his hand. Her tight
little sheath contracted around him as she neared release again. And again, he
denied her.

This time, she yelled out, “Damn you, Jace…”

He only smiled. He stopped stroking, too close to the edge
to even touch himself anymore. “Tell me what you want. Anything you want… I’ll
do it. You just have to say the words.”

He knew she was over the edge; her eyes showed just how far.
But he wanted, no, he needed to hear her say the words. He had to know that she
needed him as much as he needed her.

“Come on, Dani…tell me what you need.”

* * * * *

She heard him asking, the thoughts racing through her mind.
She knew what she wanted, knew what she needed, but she’d never said those
words out loud. He was going to make her. To force her to admit…everything…before
he’d let her have release. When his finger grazed over her clitoris, sending
shockwaves of pleasure through every inch of her body, she couldn’t hold the
words in any longer.

“Oh, hell… I want your cock in my mouth…please…let me taste
you.”

The part in question jumped, leaking more moisture from the
tip just from her words.

He lay back, across the bottom of the bed, granting her
access. “Then come…taste me.”

She eagerly crawled down the bed, desperate to have her
hands, her lips on him. To feel his hard, velvet length. She circled the tip
with her tongue, dipping into the wet slit on top, finally wrapping her lips
around the head.

She heard him suck in a deep breath, just before he grabbed
her hips and yanked, spinning her around until she was lying on top of him. Her
sex pressed against his lips and waiting tongue.

He didn’t keep her there long. With her mouth on his shaft,
she could feel his heat, feel his seed rising up. After just a few minutes, she
heard him groan as he spun her around once again. This time, he never even let
her catch her breath before burying himself inside her in one long stroke.

Dani wrapped her legs around his waist, crying out at the
feel of him filling her. On his second thrust her orgasm finally broke over
her, shattering her with an intensity she would have thought impossible. She
screamed his name, her nails gouging into his back.

As she came apart, her wet heat clenching Jace’s shaft,
holding him inside her, she saw Jace grit his teeth, his hands digging into the
bed. Somehow, to her amazed delight, he held on, staying his orgasm as he
thrust inside her.

As Dani hit one peak, he pushed her past it and right into
another. She felt him pushing into her, fast and deep and hard. Her body left
one orgasm and ran headlong into another before she could even catch her
breath.

She scraped her nails down his back until she reached his
ass, digging her fingers into the tender flesh to spur him on. As she rolled
over the next summit, she screamed out, tossing her head forward to bite his
chest as he arched over her.

* * * * *

Her nails in his ass was too much. When her body contracted
again, making a tight little fist around him, Jace let go, throwing his head
back and groaning out his pleasure. When her teeth sunk into his chest, he
cried out again, coming longer and harder than he would have ever dreamed.

Jace wasn’t sure whether they fell asleep or passed out. He
woke up sometime later, not sure what woke him. He felt her shiver and pulled
the blankets up over them, taking the time to straighten them out a bit. Then
he set an alarm, and pulled her close to him.

He felt her against him, soft and warm in sleep, her body
relaxed and trusting. Knowing that she wouldn’t hear him, would never know, he
had to say the words he’d been holding back.

He whispered in the darkness, “I love you. I will always
love you. I’m sorry for causing you so much pain. You should never have to
suffer. No matter how much I want you to stay, you deserve happy dreams, not
the horrible memories I have, the angry jackass I’ve become. Tomorrow morning,
when I tell you goodbye, when I say things to hurt you, it will hurt me too.”

He pulled her close, his heart finally at peace just for
having said it. He drifted off to sleep, more content than he could ever
remember being.

* * * * *

Dani woke to the most god-awful noise. Something
was…squawking at her? When she felt the weight of Jace’s arm across her waist,
she remembered where she was, remembered their lovemaking the night before.
When she looked around, saw the blankets, she realized he’d set an alarm for
her. And it was horrible. He finally roused, smacking a hand out to stop that
terrible racket. She watched him, sleepy eyed, hair messy, smiling softly
against the pillow. As he rolled to face her, she saw his eyes go soft and
warm…right before they turned to hard green stone. They looked very much like
the emeralds the color mimicked.

She sucked in a breath, determined to keep her cool.
Flipping back the blankets, she stood, rushing around to grab her clothes. She
made it all the way to the bathroom before the first tear fell.

She took a quick shower, struggling not to think about last
night, forcing herself to think about the morning’s schedule. She needed to get
dressed and get back to the hotel. Jenn would be there within the hour for a
quick coffee before she flew out. She borrowed Jace’s comb; digging into her
purse for a little bit of makeup, she decided that would have to do. By the
time she emerged, she felt a little more in control.

* * * * *

Jace had taken the time to get dressed, and while Dani made
some coffee he washed his face and brushed his teeth. By the time he caught up
with her in the kitchen, she was ready to leave. She looked across at him,
clearly unsure of what she should say.

Hating what he was about to do, but knowing it was for the
best, Jace waited until she headed to the door before he said anything.

He leaned in, gave her a quick peck on the cheek, and said,
“Thanks. It’s been fun. Maybe we can catch up again, the next time you’re in
town.”

He watched her blue eyes flash with pain before they glossed
over. When she smiled back at him, her lips were tight but her eyes were dry.
“Yeah…maybe. We can have dinner or something. Although I think if I decide I
want sex, I’ll call Zack next time. See what I’ve been missing all these
years.”

He gripped the door, sure he would break it if he squeezed
any harder. He’d deserved that, had expected something like it. He still hadn’t
been prepared for the pain or the rage. He struck out without thinking.
“Good…let me know how he rates compared to me.”

She gasped softly before backing out the door. She smiled, a
quick, sardonic little smirk. Then she turned on her heel and left.

Jace watched her walk away, not entirely sure whom he hated
more…Dani or himself.

She got through the morning, had coffee with Jenn, loaded
the car and drove to the airport. She checked her bags, turned in the keys, and
grabbed another coffee while she waited for her flight. Then she bought a book,
chatted with a couple other passengers, and finally got on a plane.

When she got off the plane in L.A., she grabbed a taxi, got
her bags upstairs and opened the front door. She even made it all the way
inside. She didn’t shed a tear until she saw Nina sitting at her kitchen table
with two cups of herbal tea, waiting.

And then, despite her best efforts, one lonely tear slid
down her cheek. That was all she was going to allow. She was done crying over
that asshole.

She told Nina everything. They ended up staying up all night
watching stupid movies. No chick flicks, no tearjerkers, just brainless
comedies. When morning rolled around, they had both fallen asleep on the couch.

After some coffee, Nina headed home and Dani showered and
went to go check in with her boss. She didn’t really need to go back to work
until the next day, but she didn’t want to sit around her apartment alone.

Stan was thrilled to see her, told her that nothing got done
right with her gone. She knew he was exaggerating, but it felt really good to be
needed, even a little bit. She spent the rest of the day at work, not rolling
home until close to eleven. By then she was exhausted. The combination of
stress, jet lag and lack of sleep had finally caught up with her. She crawled
into bed in her underwear, setting the alarm to get up at five. She wondered
briefly how long it would take before L.A. felt like home again.

* * * * *

After more than a week at work, Dani was starting to settle
into the routine. She felt almost human, almost normal again. Her plant had
died while she was away, no big surprise, so she bought another one on her way
home on Thursday. It was already looking sad, so even that was returning to
normal.

The realtor had called her with an appraisal amount for her
house. All she had to do was call her back and decide on a sales price and she
would be done. She couldn’t bring herself to do it. She knew she couldn’t go
back to Austin, didn’t even really want to, not now. But L.A. still didn’t feel
like home. And, until it did, she didn’t want to sell her house.

It took almost three months before she found the courage.

“What do you mean you’ve already got an offer? That’s
impossible! You just listed it on Monday!”

As Dani listened to the realtor on the other end of the
line, she tried to calm her racing heart. It took months to sell a house, even
a year sometimes, especially in this economy. Unless, of course, you weren’t
completely sure you wanted to sell it. Then it sold in two days, apparently.

She had a buyer, a cash buyer, who was willing to pay the
asking price. No haggling, no lower offers. He wasn’t even asking her to pay
any closing costs or do any repairs. This was every seller’s dream. All she had
to do was sign the papers to accept the offer.

“Wait, I’m sorry…what did you just say?” She couldn’t have
heard what she thought she’d heard. When the realtor, Karen, stopped and asked
which part, Dani realized she had tuned out right at the beginning of the
conversation. “I’m sorry… I guess all of it.”

She went home that night still in a daze. Karen had faxed
her paperwork, and she had accepted an offer on her house. In roughly thirty
days, she would no longer own that house. Her family’s house…her home.

She had mostly settled back into Los Angeles. It still
didn’t feel like home, but she had decided that might never happen. She was
content here, if not happy. There was even a guy at work who had asked her out
a few times. She was still working up the nerve to say yes, but she was sure
she would get there eventually. Maybe having the house sell was exactly what
she needed to move on with her life. To really move on.

There was only one little hitch. The new buyer wanted to
meet her in person. Something about not trusting people unless he could look
them in the eye. Since he was a cash sale, no loan approval, it would be stupid
of her to say no. That’s what Karen had told her, and logically she agreed.

She had to go to Austin.

After a quick call to Jenn, making arrangements to stay
there, she called the airport. It was still a few weeks away, but fares were
better when you booked in advance. She would be there one day. One day and two
nights. Just under thirty-six hours. She could surely avoid Jace for thirty-six
hours.

It might even do her some good. Give her a chance to say
goodbye to her childhood home, and even give her some practice in how to sneak
in and out of Austin. She wasn’t joking about Jenn being the only “sister” she
had. She was going to come see their kids when she and Bri got around to having
them. So…this would be a good test run.

She repeated all of this over and over in the next few
weeks. She kept hoping that if she said it enough, she would finally start to believe
it.

If getting on the plane had been hard, getting off in Austin
was pure hell. But she did it, pasting a phony smile on her face and trying
desperately not to think about her last trip here.

She looked around for Jenn, finding her easily enough. It
was late, almost eleven o’clock here, so there weren’t that many people flying
in.

Jenn had been thrilled to hear she was coming to visit,
although she had tried to talk Dani out of selling the house. Several times.
So, Dani was fully expecting to rehash that conversation on the way back to
Jenn and Bri’s house.

Jenn was unexpectedly quiet about the subject, sticking to
funny little anecdotes about her students instead. By the time they got to
Jenn’s house it was almost midnight, so they both went straight to bed.