You Can't Go Home Again (24 page)

He never let her come down from the first peak before he
drove her to another. She kept up the pace, her body tightening yet again
around his cock. He could hear her, her moan of pleasure turning constant. His
orgasm broke, rolling through him like a wave, wringing a purely primal yell
from his throat, just as her sheath clamped down on his shaft.

As her body wound down, her muscles turned liquid. His arm
swept around her waist, pulling her back against him and holding her upright,
his shaft still hard inside her. He pulled out, still holding her up, and
turned them around. He adjusted the water temperature, making it warmer, then
grabbed the soap.

He washed her gently, softly, leisurely exploring her body,
while wiping away the signs of his pleasure. He cupped her breasts, running his
thumbs across her sensitive nipples, slick with soap. When she was finally
supporting her own weight, he let go, quickly washing his still throbbing
member, before returning to his tour of her body.

He kissed her soft, clean skin while he rinsed her. “Let’s
go back to bed? The water’s getting cold now.”

He murmured softly against her ear, his words like a secret.
She turned, pressing her mouth against his, reaching back blindly to turn off
the water.

They stepped out together, gently drying each other. The
soft, nubby texture of the towel only heightened her arousal, heating it back
to a fever pitch. She grabbed his hand, pulling him behind her to the bed. When
her legs hit the edge, she pulled him, toppling them both.

She saw him gazing at her, wearing his sexier-than-hell half
grin. The one she had missed so much over the years. Even as her pulse
quickened, her body preparing for him, she felt the question looming. She might
regret asking, but the words wouldn’t be held back any longer. She had to know.

“So, this time wasn’t a mistake? No regrets?”

The smile left, gone in an instant, to be replaced by a
scowl. His green eyes darkened, looking deep and fathomless. He leaned in and
kissed her, hard.

* * * * *

He pulled back, taking a moment to look into her eyes. Deep
dark pools of blue. At the soft smile on her lips, he was amazed. How had he
ended up here? No one was this lucky.

He recalled how he’d felt the morning he’d woken up and she
was gone. The brief moment of terror this morning before he’d realized she was
in the shower. Didn’t she get it? He pulled his mouth away, trying to find the
words to explain. He rolled over, lying back against her pillows and pulling
her up next to him, unwilling to let go of the physical connection, even for
the time it took to explain this to her.

“I don’t pretend to understand psychics or what you ‘see’ or
whatever. But you got this one wrong. Or right, but not.” He sighed in
frustration. “Let me try this again. It was never a mistake, except that you
were gone. That was the mistake. What we did…making love…something I said…you
left.”

She lay across his chest, looking up into his eyes. “What? I
left because you thought it was a mistake. ‘The biggest mistake of your life.’”

He was shaking his head. “No…yes… It was only a mistake
because it chased you away. I had wanted to make love to you, to kiss you, to
make you mine…for well over a year. But I was your friend first. And I screwed
it up. I woke up and you were gone. I even tried to catch you at the airport…to
apologize…promise not to do it again…whatever you wanted to hear. But you took
an earlier flight.”

He looked down, saw her crying, huge tears running down past
trembling lips. “I’m sorry. Hey, shh, don’t cry.” He brushed his thumbs under
her eyes, wiping away the tears, kissing her hair.

He must have shocked her because Dani, who was never at a
loss for words, was silent. After the longest minute of his life, she finally spoke.

“I don’t understand. A year? But you never... I mean, not
really. Nothing serious. You flirted...but you flirted with everyone. And you
never kissed me. And the shower? Why didn’t you ever kiss me? Or something.”

He laughed, a low chuckle he couldn’t hold back. “Because
you would have run away. You did run away. And I would rather be your friend
than send you away sooner. Same reason I tried not to touch you now. But, damn,
that motorcycle…and you…all flushed and aroused… I had dreamed it…then…hell, I
couldn’t stop myself.”

He felt her go tense, every muscle in her body locking up.
“Dani, do I need to apologize? I thought you wanted that, but maybe not…or
maybe just with someone else.” His jaw clenched even thinking about it. “Bri
said there wasn’t a boyfriend in L.A., but you said the necklace was from
someone special.”

When she didn’t say anything, just lay there again, quiet
and tense, he started to pull away. His shaft was still rigid, a sign she
couldn’t miss, but he wasn’t going to let her walk away again. This time, he
was leaving first.

When he moved, started to get out of the bed, she squeezed
his ribs, holding him there. She sat up, leaning on one hand. “Jace, did you
dream exactly that? The motorcycle, did you dream that specifically?”

That was not what he had expected at all. “What?”

“Me, on the motorcycle, the…well, the sex in the entry. Did
you dream that, specifically?”

He thought for a minute, confusion plain in his expression.
“Well, yeah…actually. I mean…I guess.”

“When?”

“What? When? I don’t know.” He dreamed of her constantly,
kissing her, touching her. Every fucking night. How was he supposed to know
when? “Why does it matter?”

“It just does. Was it the night I stayed at your house?
Before then?”

Jace suddenly remembered. “It was the Fourth. When I found
you by the lake.” He felt the shiver course through her. “Dani, what’s wrong?”

“And last night…” She stumbled through the words, sounding
nervous. Dani never sounded nervous. “Last night, you said you woke up from a
dream. Was it a nightmare, or, ummm, a good dream?”

He looked at her face, tilting her chin up so her eyes met
his. “It was you. I’ve dreamed about you every night since you walked into the
bar. Is that what you want to hear? They’re my dreams, my problem. Why are you
so upset?”

She shook her head, sitting up, tucking her knees against
her chest. “I know how weird this sounds, but just…hang on. Do you ever have
nightmares about what happened…in Afghanistan?”

He sat up, flipping his legs over the edge of the bed,
turning his back to her, both literally and figuratively. “Dani, I don’t want
to talk about this.”

He felt her hands cool against his back. “You don’t have to
tell me what happened, Jace. Just tell me if you have nightmares?”

He flipped around, pressing her back against the bed, lying
on top of her, pinning her wrists above her head with one hand. She thought she
wanted to know. She didn’t, not really. “I dream about it…at least two or three
times a week…since it happened. Until you got here. I haven’t dreamed about anything
but making love to you since the first moment I saw you again. Is that what you
want? To hear how much I want you…need you. It was the same in college. Every
night I would dream about you…hot and wet, your legs wrapped around me. The
things I wanted to do to you…”

He dipped his head, licking her neck, rubbing his chest
against her breasts. He bit her ear, and not softly. “You wanted to know why I
never made a move? Because it would have scared the hell out of you. Just like
in the shower. Six years ago, I walked away. Just now, I pulled back.”

He licked her nipple, suckling hard then soothing it with
his tongue. He looked up and met her eyes, trying to make her understand. “If
you had any idea what I wanted to do to you, then and now, you would only have
left sooner.”

He kissed her, pressing his lips against hers, hard, needy.
“I tried to be gentle that night at the lake. But you were so damned
responsive, better than I had ever dreamed. You brought me to my knees, Dani. I
lose control when I’m with you. I’m afraid I’ll scare you, or worse, hurt you.”

He kissed her again, slow and deep, sucking her tongue into
his mouth. “Is that what you wanted to know? To know how much power you have
over me? That you can tear me apart?”

She sounded almost pained when she finally answered him. “No
more power than you have over me.” She pressed her mouth to his, hooking a leg
around his thigh. “You make me dream your dreams.”

He heard the words, not really understanding them, lost in
the feel of her body against his. His crazy need to claim her surged to life.
He didn’t understand it, should have been afraid of it, but he wasn’t. He gave
in… If his desire scared her, then so be it.

He pushed back, freeing her hands and moving down her body,
pressing kisses, licking and tasting. When he reached her core he parted her
folds with his tongue, licking her clitoris, hearing her soft sighs, before
sucking it into his mouth. When her whimpers turned to little yelps, he thrust
two fingers inside her tight sheath. He felt her orgasm starting with the first
thrust.

* * * * *

She was on fire, his lips wringing pleasure from her,
leaving her as limp as a wet dishrag. But he wouldn’t stop. His mouth was
fierce, licking and sucking, his tongue taking turns with his fingers,
thrusting inside. Another climax broke over her, surprising in its intensity.
She wasn’t sure her body could possibly handle any more.

Jace moved upwards, stopping to bite at her nipples, before
flipping her over onto her stomach as though she weighed nothing. He pulled her
hips up, bringing her to her knees, pushing them apart. She felt him behind
her, his shaft pulsing against her ass, his fingers plunging inside her, making
her body sing with pleasure once more. As his hand left, his cock, hard as
steel, pressed into her slowly, filling her.

She cried out, pushing back against him, already desperate
to speed his pace. He gripped her hips, slowing her. “No…not so fast. I want to
feel every inch of you wrapping around me.”

“God, Jace… I need you. Please!” She had never felt this
way, not even with him. He thought she had power over him, but it was nothing
compared to how he made her feel. The intensity wasn’t just physical—she felt
her heart expanding, pressing against her ribs. She needed to feel him pounding
into her, his body thrusting against hers. “Please!” she said again.

His hand came down on her ass, slapping just hard enough for
her to feel the sting. “No! Not this time… I’m not done with you yet.”

His voice was deep, growly. With the second slap, she came
apart, flying into pieces she was sure she’d never get back together. She
yelled out, her hands fisting in the pillow.

* * * * *

Feeling her coming around him, her wet heat squeezing his
shaft, he gave up on slow. He slapped her ass once more, thrusting harder and
faster. “Dani…aaahh, you make me so hard. You’re so fucking tight.” He brought
his hands up to her shoulders, pulling her back against him as he thrust
forward, using all his strength. “Aaahh, fuck…. I need you.”

He pulled her upright, her body tight against his, her back
to his front. Her hands reached backwards, digging her fingers into his ass.
When her nails joined in, he felt his cock pulse inside her, his orgasm raging
up on him.

“Harder…aaahhh! Harder!!” she cried out. Her nails raked up
the sides of his ass and he saw tears rolling down her face. She was as far
gone as he was. “Aaahh…fuck, yeah!” He brought his hands around, pinching her
nipples, biting her neck as he came harder than he’d ever imagined. And she
cried out. Not in pain, but in pleasure, coming again on his shaft.

She rolled over, stretching like a cat. She smiled a little,
thinking to herself, the cat that ate the canary. As she surfaced, she recalled
that her dream hadn’t been a dream at all. Instead, it had been a delicious
fantasy come to life. She rolled over, stretching a little more, stopping when
she heard a distinctly masculine chuckle.

She opened her eyes to find Jace, propped on one elbow,
grinning at her. She grinned back, biting her lip. “Hey.”

“Hey, yourself. Sleep well?” He trailed a finger gently down
her cheek, across her lips.

She smiled, nuzzling into his hand. “Yes. And obviously long
enough, since its dark outside.” She ran her hand down his chest, gently
brushing the scar down his side. “How long have you been awake?”

* * * * *

“Not long. I let the dog out and started a pot of coffee. I
figured we’ve already got the days and nights screwed up, so we should have
some breakfast.” He pushed a strand of hair off her face, grazing her ear.
Hearing her soft, happy sigh, he almost hated his next words. “And then, we
need to talk.”

“Okay.”

He heard the hesitancy in her voice and hated having to
cause it. He tried to put her at ease. “No regrets, Dani… I just want to talk.
And, if I actually want any answers, we need to be clothed…with a table between
us.” He rolled off, grabbing his jeans and sliding them on all in one move.

“Apparently you’ve done that before.” He heard the edge in
her voice as she finished her thought. “If you want to leave, there’s no need
to rush. I won’t try to stop you.”

He turned back, zipping his fly, but leaving the button. “I
don’t know what you’re thinking, but you’re wrong. I’m not going anywhere,
except downstairs. This is the only way I know to keep my hands off you.”

As he watched her slowly flip back the blanket and stand,
naked and beautiful, he groaned, muttering under his breath, “Even this won’t
be enough.” Then he saw the bruises.

She had red marks on her ass from where he’d smacked her,
bruises on her hips from where he’d grabbed her downstairs. Her nipples were
red where he’d sucked or pinched too hard. And there was a bite mark on her
shoulder.