Wicked: The Original Broadway Script (7 page)

[Scene 9 - Elphaba Vs. Glinda]

Glinda Enters. There Is A House In The Background. The Edge OF The Yellow Brick Road Can Be Seen.
Glinda:
That's right, you just take that one road, the whole time.
Waves offstage.
Oh, I hope they don't get lost. I'm so bad at giving directions.
She sees the house, picks up flowers and lays them in front of the house.
Oh, Nessa.
Elphaba Appears.
Elphaba:
What a touching display of grief.
Glinda:
I don't think we have anything further to say to one another.
Elphaba:
I wanted something to remember her by, and all that is left were those shoes, and now that wretched little farm girl has walked off with them. So I'd appreciate some time, alone, to say goodbye to my sister.
Glinda Backs Away As Elphaba Walks Toward The House.
Elphaba:
Nessa, please, please, please forgive me...
Glinda:
Elphie... you mustn't blame yourself. It's dreadful, it is, to have a house fall on you, but accidents will happen.
Elphaba:
You call this an accident?
Glinda:
Yes! Well, maybe not an accident...
Elphaba:
Well, what do you call it?
Glinda:
Well... a regime change. Caused by a bizarre and unexpected twister of fate.
Elphaba:
You think cyclones just appear out of the blue?
Glinda:
I don't know, I never really...
Elphaba:
No, of course you never! You're too busy telling everyone how wonderful everything is!
Glinda:
I'm a public figure, now. People expect me to...
Elphaba:
Lie?
Glinda:
Be encouraging! And what exactly have you been doing besides riding around on that filthy, old thing?
Elphaba:
Well, we can't all come and go by bubble. Who's invention was that, the Wizard's? Of course, even if it wasn't I'm sure he'd still take credit for it.
Glinda:
Yes, well, a lot of us are taking things that don't belong to us, aren't we?
Elphaba:
Now wait just a clock tick! I know it may be difficult for that blissful, blonde brain of yours to comprehend that someone like him could actually choose someone like me! But it's happened... it's real. And you can wave that ridiculous wand all you want, you can't change it! He never belonged to you, he doesn't love you, and he never did! He loves me!
Glinda Slaps Her.
Elphaba:
Cackles.
Feel better now?
Glinda:
Yes, I do.
Elphaba:
Good, so do I.
She Slaps Glinda. Glinda Then Twirls Her Wand Skillfully And Elphaba Arms Herself With Her Broom. They Charge At Each Other And Then Drop Their "Weapons" And Beat Each Other Senselessly. Glinda Takes Elphaba's Hat Off Her Head And Begins To Whack Her With It. The Guards Run In.
Guard:
Halt! In the name of the Wizard!
They Grab Elphaba.
Elphaba:
Stop! Let me go!
Glinda:
Let me go, I almost had her!
Guard:
Sorry it took us so long to get here, Miss.
Elphaba:
I can't believe you would sink this low! To use my sister's death as a trap to capture me?!
Glinda:
I never meant for this to happen! Elphie!
Fiyero Swings In On A Rope.
Fiyero:
Let the green girl go!
Glinda:
Fiyero, how in Oz?
Fiyero:
I said let her go! Or explain to all Oz how the Wizard's guards watched while Glinda the Good was slain.
Glinda:
Fiyero...
Fiyero:
I said, let her go.
The Guards Release Her.
Fiyero:
Elphaba, go, now.
Elphaba:
No, not without you.
Glinda:
Fiyero, please.
Fiyero:
Hush! Now! Go!
Elphaba Hesitates.
Glinda:
Do it!
She Runs Off.
Guard:
Seize him!
Glinda:
Wait, what?! What are you doing? Stop it! In the name of goodness, stop! Don't you see? He wasn't going to harm me, he just... he just... he loves her.
Fiyero:
Glinda, I'm so sorry!
Guard:
Take him up to that field there! Put him on one of those poles until he tells us where the witch went.
They Drag Him Offstage.
Glinda:
No, don't hurt him! Please, don't hurt him! Fiyero!!!!

[Scene 10 - No Good Deed]

Elphaba:
Fiyero!!!!
ELEKA NAHMEN NAHMEN ATUM ATUM ELEKA NAHMEN
ELEKA NAHMEN NAHMEN ATUM ATUM ELEKA NAHMEN
LET HIS FLESH NOT BE TORN LET HIS BLOOD LEAVE NO STAIN,
WILL THEY BEAT HIM, LET HIM FEEL NO PAIN...
LET HIS BONES NEVER BREAK AND HOWEVER THEY TRY TO DESTROY HIM,
LET HIM NEVER DIE, LET HIM NEVER DIE!
ELEKA NAHMEN NAHMEN ATUM ATUM ELEKA NAHMEN
ELEKA NAHMEN NAHMEN ATUM ATUM ELEKA... ELEKA
AH! WHAT GOOD IS THIS CHANTING?
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I'M READING
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT TRICK I OUGHT TO TRY!
FIYERO WHERE ARE YOU?! ALREADY DEAD OR BLEEDING?
ONE MORE DISASTER I CAN ADD TO MY GENEROUS SUPPLY!
NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED
NO ACT OF CHARITY GOES UNRESENTED
NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED
THAT'S MY NEW CREED
MY ROAD OF GOOD INTENTIONS
LED WHERE SUCH ROADS ALWAYS LEAD
NO GOOD DEED
GOES UNPUNISHED!
NESSA...
DOCTOR DILLAMOND...
FIYERO...
FIYERO!!!
ONE QUESTION HAUNTS AND HURTS
TOO MUCH, TOO MUCH TO MENTION
WAS I REALLY SEEKING GOOD
OR JUST SEEKING ATTENTION?
IS THAT ALL GOOD DEEDS ARE WHEN LOOKED AT WITH AN ICE COLD EYE?
IF THAT'S ALL GOOD DEEDS ARE
MAYBE THAT'S THE REASON WHY
NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED
ALL HELPFUL URGES SHOULD BE CIRCUMVENTED
NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED
SURE, I MEANT WELL, WELL LOOK AT WHAT WELL MEANT DID!
ALRIGHT, ENOUGH, SO BE IT!
SO BE IT THEN...
LET ALL OF OZ BE AGREED
I'M WICKED THROUGH AND THROUGH
SINCE I COULD NOT SUCCEED
FIYERO SAVING YOU
I PROMISE NO GOOD DEED WILL I ATTEMPT TO DO AGAIN
EVER AGAIN!
NO GOOD DEAD, WILL I DO
AGAIN!!!!!!!!

[Scene 11 - March of the Witch Hunters]

Ozians:
GO! AND HUNT HER AND FIND HER AND KILL HER!
Vicious Woman:
Good fortune, witch hunters!
Ozians:
GO! AND HUNT HER AND FIND HER AND KILL HER!
Rabid Man:
Kill the witch!
Ozians:
WICKEDNESS MUST BE PUNISHED
EVIL EFFECTIVELY ELIMINATED
WICKEDNESS MUST BE PUNISHED
KILL THE WITCH!

Boq:
And, this is more than just a service to the Wizard. I have a personal score to settle with Elph... with the witch!
Crowd Cheers.
IT'S DUE TO HER I'M MADE OF TIN
HER SPELL MADE THIS OCCUR
SO FOR ONCE I'M GLAD I'M HEARTLESS
I'LL BE HEARTLESS KILLING HER!
And I am not the only one
. Looks Offstage.
Oh, come on, you! Come out and tell them what she did to you in class that day. How you were just a cub and she cubnapped you.
Lion:
No!
Boq:
YOU SEE THE LION ALSO
HAS A GRIEVANCE TO REPAY
(Lion Roars)
IF SHE'D LET HIM FIGHT HIS OWN BATTLES WHEN HE WAS YOUNG,
HE WOULDN'T BE A COWARD TODAY!
Glinda:
No, no, that's not the way it happened! Madame, you've got to stop this, it's gone too far!
Morrible:
Oh, I think Elphaba can take care of herself.
Glinda:
Madame, something's been troubling me about Nessarose and that cyclone.
Morrible:
Oh yes... well, I guess it was just her time.
Glinda:
Was it? Or did you...
Morrible:
After A Pause.
Now, you listen to me, Missy, you may have fooled the rest of Oz with this "aren't I good" routine, but you know better. You've wanted this since the beginning... and now you're getting what you wanted. So just smile and wave and shut up! Good fortune, good fortune witch hunters!
Rapid Man:
Kill her!
Vicious Woman:
Kill the witch!
WICKEDNESS MUST BE PUNISHED
BRAVE WITCH HUNTERS I WOULD JOIN YOU IF I COULD
BECAUSE WICKEDNESS MUST BE PUNISHED...
PUNISHED... PUNISHED...
BUT GOOD!!!
The Scene Changes To Kiamo Ko. Sounds of Dorothy Crying Are Heard Offstage. The Witch Storms On, Frustrated.
Elphaba:
Oh, for Oz's sake, stop crying!!! I can't listen to it anymore! Oh, you want to see your Aunt Em and your Uncle What's-his-name again?! Then get those shoes off your feet!!! Little brat... takes a dead woman's shoes; must have been raised in a barn! Chistery! Oh, Chistery, there you are. Where are the others? Chistery motions away. Chistery, please... if you don't at least try to keep speaking you will never...
She Sees Glinda.
Go away.
Glinda:
They're coming for you.
Elphaba:
Go away!
Glinda:
Let the little girl go, and that poor little dog... Dodo.
Glinda:
I know you don't want to hear this, but someone has to say it... You are out of control! I mean, come on! They're just shoes, let it go! Elphaba, you can't go on like this.
Elphaba:
I can do anything I want. I am the Wicked Witch of the West!
Another monkey Brings Her A Letter.
At last! What took you so long?
She Reads It.
What's this? Why are you bothering me with this?
She Reads On.
Glinda:
What is it? What's wrong? It's Fiyero, isn't it? Is he...
Elphaba:
We've seen his face for the last time.
Glinda:
Oh no!
Elphaba:
You're right... It's time I surrender.
Carries A Bucket.
Glinda:
Elphie.... Elphie, what is it?
Elphaba:
You can't be found here! You must go.
Refers To A Corner
Glinda:
No.
Elphaba:
You must leave.
Glinda:
No! Elphie, I'll tell them everything.
Elphaba:
No! They'll only turn against you.
Glinda:
I don't care!
Elphaba:
I do! Promise me, promise me, you won't try to clear my name... promise.
Glinda:
Alright... I promise. But I don't understand.
Elphaba:
I'M LIMITED
JUST LOOK AT ME, I'M LIMITED
AND JUST LOOK AT YOU, YOU CAN DO ALL I COULDN'T DO, GLINDA
Elphaba:
Here. Go on. Take this.
Hands Her The Grimmerie.
Glinda:
Elphie... you know I can't read that... Elphie...
Elphaba:
Well then, you'll have to learn
NOW IT'S UP TO YOU
FOR BOTH OF US
NOW IT'S UP TO YOU
Elphaba:
You're the only friend I've ever had.
Glinda:
And I've had so many friends... but only one that mattered.
[Scene 12 - For Good]

Glinda:
I'VE HEARD IT SAID
THAT PEOPLE COME INTO OUR LIVES FOR A REASON
BRINGING SOMETHING WE MUST LEARN
AND WE ARE LED TO THOSE
WHO HELP US MOST TO GROW
IF WE LET THEM
AND WE HELP THEM IN RETURN
WELL, I DON'T KNOW IF I BELIEVE THAT'S TRUE
BUT I KNOW I'M WHO I AM TODAY
BECAUSE I KNEW YOU
LIKE A COMMIT PULLED FROM ORBIT,
AS IT PASSES A SUN
LIKE A STREAM THAT MEETS A BOULDER
HALF WAY THROUGH THE WOOD
WHO CAN SAY IF I'VE BEEN CHANGED FOR THE BETTER?
BUT, BECAUSE I KNEW YOU...
I HAVE BEEN CHANGED
FOR GOOD...
Elphaba:
IT WELL MAY BE,
THAT WE WILL NEVER MEET AGAIN
IN THIS LIFETIME
SO LET ME SAY BEFORE WE PART
SO MUCH OF ME
IS MADE OF WHAT I LEARNED FROM YOU
YOU'LL BE WITH ME
LIKE A HANDPRINT ON MY HEART...
AND NOW WHATEVER WAY OUR STORIES END
I KNOW YOU HAVE RE-WRITTEN MINE
BY BEING MY FRIEND...
LIKE A SHIP BLOWN FROM IT'S MOORING
BY A WIND OFF THE SEA
LIKE A SEA DROP BY A SKY BIRD
IN A DISTANT WOOD
WHO CAN SAY IF I'VE BEEN CHANGED FOR THE BETTER?
BUT BECAUSE I KNEW YOU
Glinda:
BECAUSE I KNEW YOU
Both:
I HAVE BEEN CHANGED...
FOR GOOD...
Elphaba:
AND JUST TO CLEAR THE AIR
I ASK FORGIVNESS FOR THE THINGS I'VE DONE
YOU BLAME ME FOR.
Glinda:
BUT THEN I GUESS, WE KNOW THERE'S BLAME TO SHARE
Both:
AND NONE OF IT SEEMS TO MATTER ANYMORE!
Glinda:
LIKE A COMET PULLED FROM ORBIT AS IT PASSES A SUN...
Elphaba:
LIKE A SHIP BLOWN FROM ITS MOORING BY A WIND OFF THE SEA
Glinda:
LIKE A STREAM THAT MEETS A BOULDER
Elphaba:
LIKE A SEA DROP BY A BIRD
Glinda:
HALFWAY THROUGH THE WOOD
Elphaba:
IN THE WOOD
Glinda:
WHO CAN SAY IF I'VE BEEN CHANGED FOR THE BETTER?
Both:
I DO BELIEVE I HAVE BEEN CHANGED FOR THE BETTER.
Glinda:
AND, BECAUSE I KNEW YOU
Elphaba:
BECAUSE I KNEW YOU
Both:
BECAUSE I KNEW YOU
I HAVE BEEN CHANGED
FOR GOOD...