Wicked: The Original Broadway Script (3 page)

[Scene 8 - Dancing Through Life]
Fiyero:
THE TROUBLE WITH SCHOOLS IS
THEY ALWAYS TRY TO TEACH THE WRONG LESSON
BELIEVE ME, I'VE BEEN KICKED OUT OF ENOUGH OF THEM TO KNOW!
THEY WANT YOU TO BECOME LESS CALLOW, LESS SHALLOW,
BUT I SAY WHY INVITE STRESS IN?
STOP STUDYING STRIFE
AND LEARN TO LIVE
THE UNEXAMINED LIFE...
DANCIN' THROUGH LIFE
SKIMMING THE SURFACE
GLIDING WHERE TURF IS SMOOTH
LIFE IS PAINLESS FOR THE BRAINLESS
THOSE WHO DON'T TRY, NEVER LOOK FOOLISH
DANCING THROUGH LIFE
NO NEED TO TOUGH IT
WHEN YOU CAN SLUFF IT OFF AS I DO
NOTHING MATTERS, BUT KNOWING NOTHING MATTERS
IT'S JUST LIFE, SO KEEP DANCING THROUGH
DANCING THROUGH LIFE
SWAYING AND SWEEPING
AND ALWAYS KEEPING COOL
LIFE IS FRAUGHTLESS
WHEN YOU'RE THOUGHTLESS
THOSE WHO DON'T TRY
NEVER LOOK FOOLISH
DANCING THROUGH LIFE
MINDLESS AND CARELESS
MAKE SURE YOU'RE WHERE LESS TROUBLE IS RIFE
WHOES ARE FLEETING
BLOWS ARE GLANCING
WHEN YOU'RE DANCING
THROUGH LIFE!
Fiyero:
So! What's the most swankified place in town?
Galinda:
That would be the Ozdust Ballroom!
Fiyero:
Sounds perfect!
LET'S GO DOWN TO THE OZDUST BALLROOM
WE'LL MEET THERE LATER TONIGHT
WE CAN DANCE 'TIL IT'S LIGHT
FIND THE PRETTIEST GIRL
GIVE HER A WHIRL!
RIGHT ON DOWN TO THE OZDUST BALLROOM
COME ON FOLLOW ME!
YOU'LL BE HAPPY TO BE THERE
Students:
DANCIN' THROUGH LIFE, DOWN AT THE OZDUST (LIFE!)
Fiyero:
IF ONLY BECAUSE DUST IS WHAT WE COME TO!
Students:
NOTHIN' MATTERS, BUT KNOWING NOTHING MATTERS
IT'S JUST LIFE!!!
Fiyero:
SO KEEP DANCING THROUGH...
Boq:
Miss Galinda? I hope you'll save at least one dance for me. I'll be waiting right there, right by your side, waiting, all night.
Galinda:
Oh, how very kind, Biq.
Boq:
... Boq...
Galinda:
But, do you know what would be even kinder?
SEE THAT TRAGICALLY BEAUTIFUL GIRL?
THE ONE IN THE CHAIR?
IT SEEMS SO UNFAIR
WE SHOULD GO ON A SPREE
AND NOT SHE, GEE
I KNOW SOMEONE WOULD BE MY HERO
IF THAT SOMEONE WERE
TO GO INVITE HER!
Boq:
Well, maybe I could invite her!
Galinda:
OH, BIQ, REALLY?
YOU WOULD DO THAT FOR ME?
Boq:
I would do anything for you, Miss Galinda.
Walks Over To Nessarose.
Excuse me, Miss Nessarose? There's something I'd like to ask you...
Fiyero:
To Galinda.
You're good.
Galinda:
I don't know what you mean. But I do happen to be free tonight, so...
Fiyero:
So, I'll be picking you up around eight?
Galinda:
After all...
NOW THAT WE'VE MET ONE ANOTHER,
Both:
IT'S CLEAR WE DESERVE EACHOTHER!
Galinda:
You're perfect!
Fiyero:
You're perfect!
Both:
SO WE'RE PERFECT TOGETHER
BORN TO BE FOREVER
DANCING THROUGH LIFE!!!
The Scene Fades To Elphaba and Nessarose.
Elphaba:
It's absurd! This silly, rich boy appears and everyone's off to worship him and some cultish social gathering!
Nessarose:
Even me! I'm going! Isn't it wonderful? Boq was too shy to ask me at first, but once Galinda encouraged him...
Elphaba:
Galinda?!
Nessarose:
Don't you dare say another word against her! I'm about to have the first happy night of my life all thanks to Galinda!
FINALLY FOR THIS ONE NIGHT,
I'M ABOUT TO HAVE A FUN NIGHT
WITH THIS MUNCHKIN BOY GALINDA FOUND FOR ME
AND I ONLY WISH THERE WERE
SOMETHING I COULD DO FOR HER TO REPAY HER
ELPHABA SEE...
WE DESERVE EACHOTHER AND GALINDA HELPED IT COME TRUE
WE DESERVE EACHOTHER, ME AND BOQ
Nessarose:
Please, Elphaba, try to understand.
Elphaba:
I DO...
The Scene Changes To Galinda, Shen Shen, & Pfanee. Elphaba Remains On The Other Side Of The Stage.
Galinda:
Now I must accessorize myself for Fiyero.
Shen Shen Pulls The Witch's Hat Out Of One Of Galinda's Hat Boxes.
Pfanee:
Galinda, what in Oz's name!?
Galinda:
Now, just pretend you didn't see that. My granny is always giving me the most hideodeous hats. I'd give it away, but I don't hate anyone that much.
Shen Shen:
Yes you do!
Pfanee:
Give it to her! Just do it!
They All Stare At Elphaba. Galinda Walks Forward, Meeting Elphaba Half Way.
Elphaba:
Galinda, listen, Nessa and I were talking about you just now...
Galinda:
And I was just talking about you! I thought you might want to wear this hat to the party tonight!
Gives Her The Hat.
IT'S REALLY... UH... SHARP!
DON'T YOU THINK?
Y'KNOW BLACK, IS THIS YEAR'S PINK!
YOU DESERVE EACHOTHER,
THIS HAT AND YOU,
YOU'RE BOTH SO... SMART!
YOU DESERVE EACHOTHER, SO HERE!
OUT OF THE GOODNESS OF MY HEART!
Galinda Runs Off. Elphaba Laughs At The Sight Of The Hat. She Exits.. The Students Enter And Dance. When This Is Done, Boq And Nessarose Appear, Awkwardly Holding Hands.
Nessarose:
What's in the punch?
Boq:
Lemons, and melons, and pears!

Nessarose:
Oh my!
Boq:
LISTEN NESSA...
Nessarose:
Yes?
Boq:
UH, NESSA...
I'VE GOT SOMETHING TO CONFESS A
REASON WHY, WELL, WHY I ASKED YOU HERE TONIGHT...
NOW, I KNOW IT ISN'T FAIR.
Nessarose:
Oh, Boq, I know why.
Boq:
You do?
Nessarose:
IT'S BECAUSE I'M IN THIS CHAIR, AND YOU FELT SORRY FOR ME...
WELL, ISN'T THAT RIGHT?
Boq:
No... it's because... uh... because...
BECAUSE YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!
Nessarose:
Oh, Boq!
I THINK YOU'RE WONDERFUL!
AND WE DESERVE EACH OTHER, DON'T YOU SEE THIS IS OUR CHANCE?
WE DESERVE EACH OTHER, DON'T WE BOQ?
Boq:
You know what? Let's dance!
Nessarose:
What?
Boq:
LET'S DANCE!
They Dance, As Well As The Others Around Them. Finally, Mme. Morrible Runs Up To Galinda
.
Morrible:
Oh, Miss Upland?
Galinda:
Madame Morrible... What are you doing here?
Morrible:
I have something for you.
She Hands Her A Small Wand.
Galinda:
Gasps.
Madame... a training wand... How can I ever express my graditution?
Morrible:
Oh, don't thank me! This was your roommate's idea, not mine.
Galinda:
What? Elphaba?
Morrible:
Miss Elphaba requested that I include you in sorcery class. She insisted I tell you this very night or she would quit the seminar.
Galinda:
But... why?
Morrible:
I have no idea. My personal opinion is you do not have what it takes. I hope you'll prove me wrong... I doubt you will.
She Leaves. Fiyero Comes Up To Galinda.
Fiyero:
What is it?
Galinda:
I got what I wanted...
Fiyero:
Then what's the matter?
Galinda:
Nothing...
Fiyero:
Good. Let's dance...
They Begin To Dance As Elphaba Walks In. They Stop As All The Students Gasp And Make Comments About The Way She Is Dressed. People
Then Start Laughing.
Fiyero:
Who in Oz is this?
Galinda:
My roommate... please, don't ... stare!
Fiyero:
How can you help it?
Elphaba Takes Off The Hat, Noticing The Comments. She Waits, Then Puts It Back On And Begins To Dance. She Is Alone. There Is No Music.
Fiyero:
Well I'll say this, she doesn't give a twig about what anyone else thinks.
Galinda:
Of course does, she just pretends not to... I feel awful...
Fiyero:
Why? It's not like it's your fault.
Galinda:
Excuse me...
She Walks Over To Elphaba and Clears Her Throat.
May I cut in?
Galinda Begins Dancing Just As Horribly. The Students Now Accept It, And Begin To Dance Again As The Music Starts.
All:
DANCING THROUGH LIFE, DOWN AT THE OZDUST
IF ONLY BECAUSE DUST IS WHAT WE COME TO
AND THE STRANGE THING, YOUR LIFE COULD END UP CHANGING
WHILE YOU'RE DANCING THROUGH

[Scene 9 - Sharing Secrets]

Elphaba & Galinda Barge Into Their Suite... Galinda Is In Hysterics.
Galinda:
Your very first party ever?! Your very first party! Oh I know! Let's tell each other something we've never told anyone... I'll go first: Fiyero and I are going to be married
(squeals).
Elphaba:
Really? He's asked you already?
Galinda:
No, he doesn't know yet... Now, you tell me a secret.
Elphaba:
Like what?
Galinda:
Like... Why do you always sleep with this funny, little, green bottle under your pillow?
Grabs The Bottle.
Elphaba:
Give that back.
Galinda:
C'mon, tell me. Tell me tell me!
Elphaba:
It was my mother's! That's all...
Silence.
Galinda:
Hands Her The Bottle.
It's not fair. I told you a really good one.
Elphaba:
My father hates me.
Galinda:
Gasps.
Elphaba:
No, that's not the secret. It's my fault...
Galinda:
What is?
Elphaba:
... that my sister is the way she is. .
Pause.
You see, when my mother was carrying Nessa, my father was worried that the new baby might come out...
Both:
Green.
Elphaba:
So he made my mother chew milk flowers, day and night. But that made Nessa come too soon, with her little legs all tangled. And my mother never woke up. None of which ever would have happened if not for me.
Galinda:
But that was the milkflowers fault, not yours. That may be your secret, Elphaba, but that doesn't make it true. Oh look, it's tomorrow! Elphie... do you mind if I call you Elphie?
Elphaba:
Well, it's a little perky.
Galinda:
And you can call me... Galinda. So... Elphie... now that we're friends, I've decided to make you my new project!
Elphaba:
You really don't have to do that.
Galinda:
I know, that's what makes me so nice!
[Scene 10 - Popular]

Galinda:
WHENEVER I SEE SOMEONE LESS FORTUNATE THAN I
AND LET'S FACE IT... WHO ISN'T
LESS FORTUNATE THAN I?
MY TENDER HEART TENDS TO START TO BLEED
AND WHEN SOMEONE NEEDS A MAKEOVER
I SIMPLY HAVE TO TAKEOVER
I KNOW I KNOW
EXACTLY WHAT THEY NEED
AND EVEN IN YOUR CASE...
THOUGH IT'S THE TOUGHEST CASE I'VE YET TO FACE!
DON'T WORRY! I'M DETERMINED TO SUCCEED
FOLLOW MY LEAD
AND YES INDEED
YOU
WILL
BE...
POPULAR!
YOU'RE GONNA BE POPULAR
I'LL TEACH THE PROPER PLOYS
WHEN YOU TALK TO BOYS
LITTLE WAYS TO FLIRT AND FLOUNCE (SQUEALS)
I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT SHOES TO WEAR
HOW TO FIX YOUR HAIR
EVERYTHING THAT REALLY COUNTS TO BE POPULAR
I KNOW ABOUT POPULAR
AND WITH AN ASSIST FROM ME
TO BE WHO YOU'LL BE
INSTEAD OF DREARY WHO YOU WERE...
WELL ARE...
THERE'S NOTHING THAT CAN STOP YOU
FROM BECOMING POPULER...
LAR!
LA LA LA LA
WE'RE GONNA MAKE YOU POPULAR!
WHEN I SEE DEPRESSING CREATURES
WITH UNPREPOSSESSING FEATURES,
I REMIND THEM ON THEIR OWN BEHALF
TO THINK OF
CELEBRATED HEADS OF STATE
OR ESPECIALLY GREAT COMMUNICATORS
DID THEY HAVE BRAINS OR KNOWLEDGE?
DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH!
THEY WERE POPULAR
PLEASE, IT'S ALL ABOUT POPULAR
IT'S NOT ABOUT APTITUDE
IT'S THE WAY YOU'RE VIEWED
SO IT'S VERY SHREWD TO BE
VERY VERY POPULAR
LIKE ME!
Elphaba:
This is never going to work!
Galinda:
Oh Elphie, you mustn't think that way anymore! Your whole life is going to change... and all because of me. Okay, stand... I will turn your frock into a beautiful ball gown! Stand up...
She Picks Up Her Wand And Waves It.
Ball gown!!!
Nothing Happens, So She Repeats.
Ball gown!!!
Still Nothing Happens. She Taps Her Wand On The Bed.
Is this thing on?
Elphaba:
Do you want me to try?
Galinda:
No, I've got it!
She Throws The Wand Down.
Oh, just wear the frock... it's pretty! Now, I'll show you how to flip your hair: Flip flip. Or you could use your hand.
Demonstrates.
Or, you can use your whole body.
Falls onto bed. Squeals.
Now, for the finishing touch.
Takes flower out of her hair, puts it into Elphaba's.
Why, Miss Elphaba, look at you, you're beautiful.
Hands her the mirror.
Elphaba:
After Looking In The Mirror.
I... I have to go.
She Runs Off.
Galinda:
You're Welcome!
She Admires Herself In The Mirror.
AND THOUGH YOU PROTEST
YOUR DISINTEREST,
I KNOW CLANDESTINELY...
YOU'RE GONNA GRIN AND BEAR IT
YOUR NEW FOUND POPULARITY! (SQUEALS)
LA LA LA LA
YOU'LL BE POPULAR!
JUST NOT QUITE AS POPULAR
AS ME!!!