Whispers (32 page)

‘I’m fine now,’ she said as she rested her head on his shoulder. It had been such a long time since they had been like this that she didn’t want anything to spoil it.

They sat in companionable silence until Jess dozed off, and when Simon gently woke her some time later, she started.

‘It’s all right,’ he soothed. ‘You’ve been out for the count but it’s bedtime now. Go on, you go up. I’ll lock up and I’ll join you in a minute.’

‘Thanks, love,’ she murmured, feeling more contented than she had in a long time.

She was propped against the headboard waiting for him when he came into the bedroom ten minutes later and smiled at her suggestively. ‘Move over and let your husband make love to you,’ he said softly.

Only too happy to oblige Jess did as she was told, burning with desire as his warm hands found their way beneath her nightshirt. And suddenly she remembered why she had fallen in love with him as he kissed away all her concerns, and there was no one but the two of them in the whole world.

An hour later she lay with her head on his broad chest listening to his heartbeat. The rain was hammering against the windows but she was oblivious to everything but the man lying at her side.

‘Are you all right?’ he whispered into the darkness.

‘Mm,
better
than all right.’

‘Good.’ He kissed the top of her head before saying hesitantly, ‘Actually Jess, I need to ask you something.’

‘So ask away then,’ she purred as she played with the hairs on his chest.

‘Well . . . um, the thing is . . . I need a favour.’

Leaning on her elbow she stared down at him, watching the shadows
play
across his face and thinking how handsome he was as she waited for him to go on.

‘I – look, I need to borrow some money. I hate to ask but I’m pretty desperate, to be honest.’

The smile disappeared to be replaced by a frown. She had never known Simon to be short before, particularly since she had come into her gran’s inheritance. Until then he had always been the breadwinner, but since then she had never expected a single penny from him. She paid for all the housekeeping expenses and all the bills, apart from the various insurances, which Simon had always seen to, and had assumed that his business was doing well.

‘The thing is,’ he hurried on when she didn’t immediately answer him, ‘work is fine but I have some clients who haven’t paid me for fairly large jobs yet, and until they do I’m a bit strapped. I’ve got suppliers waiting to be paid and I need wages for the men. It shouldn’t be for long though. As soon as they do pay me I can give it you back.’

‘How much do you need?’ she asked.

‘About ten thousand should do it.’

‘Ten thousand
pounds
!’ Jess couldn’t keep the shock from sounding in her voice and she felt him tense.

‘I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t have to,’ he muttered resentfully, and she instantly felt guilty as she thought of all the years he had kept her and the children.

‘Well, of course you can have it. I was just surprised when I heard how much you needed,’ she explained hurriedly.

‘Building materials don’t come cheap,’ he told her. ‘And it is only a loan until the clients that owe me cough up.’

‘Don’t be so silly,’ she scolded him. ‘The money might be in a bank account in my name, but it belongs to both of us. We’re married, aren’t we? When do you need it?’

‘I was wondering if you could perhaps write me a cheque?’

‘Of course I will,’ she assured him.

‘Thanks,’ he said shortly, and as he turned his back to her she realised how much it must have cost him to ask. As it was, she could afford that amount comfortably. She still had over a hundred thousand pounds of her gran’s money left, although she knew that most of that would go when she finished the rest of the renovations. Everything was so expensive and she sometimes felt that she was throwing money into a bottomless pit; she just hoped that it would be all worth it. It would certainly be a comfortable inheritance for the girls one day, and
that
knowledge gave her a great deal of comfort. Hopefully they wouldn’t have to struggle as she and Simon had done when they had first got married. Every penny had counted back then and they had often had to rob Peter to pay Paul. But all that was behind them now and they were comparatively well-off compared to most people.

Snuggling down beneath the duvet she closed her eyes and soon she was fast asleep.

The weather was appalling the following day and so Simon decided it would be useless to try and work in it.

Jess wrote him a cheque out and handed it to him with a bright smile.

‘Thanks, love,’ he said as he stuffed it in his pocket. ‘I think I’ll go into town and pay it into my account, then I’m going to go and chase up some of these clients that owe me. But I shouldn’t be too long.’

Jess felt vaguely disappointed. She had hoped they might spend the day together, but it was nice to see Simon cheerful again so she nodded.

‘Why don’t you call in the butcher’s in Chapel End while I’m gone and get us all a nice bit of steak for our dinner?’ he suggested as he left the house a short time later.

‘You’re on, if that’s what you fancy,’ she said cheerfully, and when he strode away she found herself humming merrily. Simon certainly seemed to be happy again. If she could just get Mel out of her moods, things would be looking up at last.

‘That’s it then. No more school for two whole weeks now,’ Jess smiled when she and the girls arrived home one day in late December.

‘I can’t believe it’s Christmas in just one more week,’ Jo said excitedly. ‘I’ve asked Dad if I can have a pony. We have plenty of room to keep one, don’t we?’

‘But I thought you said a couple of weeks ago that you wanted a computer?’ Jess queried. That was Jo all over; she changed her mind like the wind.

‘Well, I suppose that would do if I can’t have a pony,’ Jo shot back with a grin.

‘And what would you like, pet?’ Jess asked her other daughter.

Mel shrugged. ‘I’m not bothered. I don’t want anything really.’

Jess sighed. Mel was getting no easier at all, although things between Jess herself and Simon had improved vastly over the last couple of weeks, which was one blessing.

‘Dad’s picking a Christmas tree up this evening on his way home from work,’ Jess now informed them. ‘You can help decorate it if you like.’

‘I will,’ Jo volunteered. ‘And I can go out and collect some holly for you too if you like. I saw some in the woods the other day when I took Alfie for a walk.’

‘That would be nice, love. We could put some along the mantelpiece, and I’ll get some mistletoe too when I go into town tomorrow.’

Jess had been shopping for presents almost non-stop for the last two weeks but thankfully she was almost finished now, which just left all of the wrapping to do.

‘Can I stay over at my friend’s house tomorrow night after her birthday party?’ Jo asked, and Jess nodded obligingly.

‘I don’t see why not, so long as her mum is agreeable to it. I got a present for you to give her and a card, so you can wrap it up tonight if you like.’

‘Thanks, Mum.’ Jo hummed along to the Christmas songs on the radio while Mel stared glumly out of the window.

‘And did you decide if you’re going to the Christmas disco at school tonight?’ Jess asked her.

Mel shook her head. ‘No, I reckon I’ll give it a miss.’

‘That’s a shame, because I got you a new top and those jeans from Monsoon that you’ve had your eye on,’ Jess said, handing her a carrier bag. ‘Why don’t you just try them on? It might get you in the mood, and we can always change the top if you don’t like it or if it doesn’t fit. We’ve just about got time to get back to the shop before it shuts.’

‘Thanks,’ Mel mumbled ungraciously, and snatching the bag from her mother she disappeared off up the stairs.

Jess shook her head despairingly. There was just no pleasing Mel nowadays no matter what she did, and it was seriously getting her down. The girl was becoming more and more reclusive.

Jess slipped upstairs to change into the new, bigger trousers she had bought for herself. She sighed with relief when she took off the pair she had been wearing, and then reaching into the bedside drawer, she took out a band to tie her hair back while she cooked the dinner. It was then that her eyes settled on the journal and almost instantly the whispers started up again. She hadn’t read a word of it for weeks, but promised herself that tonight, after they’d put the Christmas tree up, she would have an early night and catch up on the next chapter of Martha’s life. Then in a happy mood, she went downstairs to prepare the evening meal.

Simon was home early. The weather was playing havoc with his outdoor jobs and he was beginning to wonder if the rain was ever going to stop; however, he had called into the marketplace and remembered the Christmas tree.

It towered above Jess and she chuckled as he dragged it into the kitchen. ‘Is it big enough?’ she teased.

‘Well, you didn’t say what size you wanted,’ he said lamely as he leaned it against the wall. ‘I’ll fetch a bucket in and set it up for you after dinner. Where are you going to put it?’

‘I thought we’d put it in the formal lounge.’ Jess could just picture it against the ornate marble fireplace but Jo had other ideas.

‘Oh Mum, please don’t put it in there,’ she said. ‘We never get to go in there so we won’t see it. And Alfie isn’t allowed in there either because of the new carpet. Can’t we put it into the small lounge where we sit every night?’

‘She does have a point,’ Simon agreed. Jess was very house-proud when it came to the rooms that had been decorated, which was most of the downstairs ones now.

‘But I thought we might use the formal lounge seeing as it’s Christmas,’ Jess answered.

‘Nah, let’s stick to the small one, it’s cosier,’ Jo insisted, and when Jess saw Simon wink at her she sighed. She knew when she was out-voted.

‘I suppose you’re right but let’s have dinner first, eh?’ She had made a large pan of beef stew with fluffy dumplings floating in it, and the smell was making Jo’s stomach rumble in anticipation.

When the meal was over Jo went off to wrap her friend’s birthday present ready for the next day and Mel slouched off to her room to play on her computer.

It was then that Simon became serious as he told Mel, ‘Bill had to leave work this morning. His wife called him on his mobile to tell him that his dad has passed away unexpectedly. It looks like it was a massive heart-attack, from what we can gather. And he only lost his mum last year so it’s hit him pretty hard.’

‘Oh, how awful and just before Christmas too. Not that there’s ever a good time to lose someone you love,’ Jo said, thinking back to the time when she had lost her gran. ‘The poor chap must be devastated.’ She was very fond of Bill, who had turned out to be Simon’s right-hand man over the years.

‘He is, I’ve told him to have as long off as he needs. He’ll have to organise the funeral and everything now, and it’s not as if we’re inundated with work at this time of year. In fact, things are pretty grim at the moment. I’ve got enough booked until the end of January but then nothing.’

Jess smiled at him. ‘Try not to worry about it. It’s early days yet, and it’s not as if we’re starving, is it? Something will turn up. It usually does and then by the time spring arrives you’ll be working all the hours God sends again.’

‘You’re probably right,’ Simon admitted, then shot off to the outbuildings to find a bucket sturdy enough to house the Christmas tree.

Once he had gone off for his weekly game of darts Jess and Jo set to and decorated the tree. Jess had chosen to store the baubles and lights for it down in the cellar instead of all the way up in the attic, and she wasn’t at all keen on going down there. There was only one single light bulb to illuminate the whole massive space and the steps were slippery with damp and mould. She’d been intending to get down there and give the whole place a thorough clean ever since they’d
moved
in, but as yet she hadn’t found the time. Now she couldn’t envisage it getting done until well after the baby was born. Not that there was any panic.

Later when the tree was dressed, Jess switched on the lights.

‘Oh, it looks lovely,’ Jo gasped with childish pleasure.

Jess grinned, pleased with her response. ‘Yes, it does, but now it’s bedtime for you, young lady. I’ve promised myself an early night as I’m worn out.’

‘You’re not ill, are you, Mum?’ Jo looked at her anxiously.

Jess ruffled her hair. ‘Of course I’m not. But I’m lumping this around with me now and I get tired.’ She rubbed her expanding stomach and Jo was all smiles again as she pecked her on the cheek and skipped happily out of the room.

An hour later, Jess settled contentedly back on her pillows and opened Martha’s journal and as she began to read, she forgot everything.

27 December

Oh, it’s been a wonderful Christmas but so busy that it has passed in a blur. The Master and the young Master and Mistress all had their Christmas dinner in the dining room and it looked so grand that I could hardly believe it. The table was covered in a snow-white cloth and laid with the best silver cutlery and the finest china, and the guests all drank out of crystal goblets. The meal consisted of five courses and I had never seen so much food all at one time in my life before . . .

The panic was over and Mrs Bloom sighed with relief as she dropped exhausted into Granny’s old rocking chair. ‘Eeh, I don’t mind admittin’ I were panickin’ there fer a time,’ she said, wiping the sweat from her brow. ‘That goose the Mistress ordered was so enormous I’d feared it would never go in the oven, but all’s well that ends well. I wonder if they all enjoyed it?’

Martha was at the sink rubbing salt into the bottom of the great sooty cooking pots when the door opened minutes later and the cook’s question was answered when Miss Melody appeared looking beautiful in a pale green silk gown with pearls about her throat and dangling from her ears.

‘Oh Cook, I just had to come and thank you personally for such a lovely meal,’ she smiled. ‘The goose and vegetables were cooked to perfection and so were the plum puddings.’