Where did your heart go? (The Heart Trilogy Book 1) (11 page)

BOOK: Where did your heart go? (The Heart Trilogy Book 1)
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Chapter 13

 

Charlotte
had been practising her routine almost non stop since her dance teacher had told her about the competition in Birmingham. The troupe was 12 girls, including her best friend Julia, and they were going to be doing their most difficult routine for the competition to the song ‘Umbrella’ by Rhianna. It meant that they had to use brollies as props for the routine. What was even better was that Charlotte had been chosen to perform the small solo section in the middle of the song so the diary remained un-read for the next few days of the week until Saturday dawned.

 

“Good Luck, sweetheart” I said as she boarded the coach at seven and I prepared myself for possible upset on return if they didn’t get through to the final. I was pretty sure that they would as I had been lucky enough to watch the routine at the school Christmas concert and although Charlotte had told me they had changed some of it since then I waved the coach off and gave my daughter the thumbs up sign, positive they would get through. Having the day ahead without any interruptions was a luxury so I gave Sarah a call and we headed for the Health spa for a day of pampering.

 

Sitting together in the Jacuzzi I turned to Sarah

“You
know I gave Charlie my diary to read” I said.

“Yes, is something wrong” Sarah asked

“Well, every time I go into her room I find that I have to keep reading it myself and my mind is a mess of memories” I replied “I’m not sure I’ve done the right thing” I finished.

Sarah reached out and patted my arm

“I’m sure you’ve done the right thing and I’m sure she’s strong enough to cope with everything you’ve written” Sarah said. She looked down as we both remembered New Year’s Eve.

“After all, it was because of this that you got together with Mark eventually” she finished. I nodded and smiled again, although deep in my heart I knew that Mark had always been the consolation prize.

 

I smiled and remembered the significant part I had
played in getting Sarah and Chris together. I was amazed that they had come through the years and still looked as much in love as they did at our school leaver’s dance twenty four years ago. Their only heartbreak had been the realisation that they were never going to be able to have children, but they had helped me so much when Charlotte had been born and Mark had gone that they were almost like surrogate parents to her and she always knew that she could turn to them as well as me in times of need.

“Thanks for a lovely afternoon” Sarah said, as I dropped her off at home.

“I hope Charlotte’s group has got through” Sarah said.

“Me too, otherwise they’ll be tears before bedtime” I groaned. Sarah giggled

“Well you know where I am if you need to escape” she finished.

 

As the coach pulled into the large arena car park Charlotte started to feel the nerves kicking in. However once she was in the large auditorium with all the other dance groups the excited noise of teenage voices calmed her nerves. Julia and Charlotte went for a quick walk around to check out all the competition but secretly they wanted to check out all the guys that were there as some of the groups were from colleges.

 

Each troupe then watched all the others do their routines and Charlotte was glad she wasn’t a judge as the competition was fierce. Charlotte was particularly impressed with the group of guys from a college in Rugby as their acrobatics took an amazing amount of skill. In particular one guy stood out from the rest, he was tall with dark hair and a fantastic muscular physique. She guessed he was around 20 years old.

“Come on Julia lets go and congratulate them” Charlie said, as they headed over to the side of the stage.

“I’m at the mercy of your crush” Julia sighed, as her friend grabbed her hand.

“Hi, great routine” Charlie said as she stuck out her hand at the dark haired guy

“Hi there, thanks” he said “My name’s Mitchell by the way”

“Pleased to meet you Mitchell I’m
Charlotte and this is Julia” Charlie said.

As she shook his hand she felt a shock of desire spike through her body and she blushed as he smiled and his green eyes drank her in.

 

“Come on Charlie, we’ve got to warm up before our routine” Julia said, trying to drag her mesmerised friend away from the gaze of Mitchell.

“I’ll look forward to seeing you dance” Mitch said, as he walked away with the guys from his group. Thankfully their routine was as tight as they had ever performed it before and with applause ringing in their ears they left the stage. She glanced around for Mitchell and spotted him and his mates and he smiled and waved. At the end the groups all assembled around the stage to hear the results, only six would go through to the final and Charlotte grabbed Julia’s hand as they waited for what seemed like an age before their names were called out and they were through. Then she waited and sure enough the college from Rugby also go through which was good news.

 

As they were waiting outside for their coach to return from the car park Mitchell rushed over to her and handed her a scrap of paper, it had his mobile phone number on it and just the words ‘text me, Mitch’ She hugged herself and watched him run back to board his minibus before she boarded theirs. All the way home Charlotte debated about how soon she should text him, should she do it now or later tonight or tomorrow morning. In the end she decided that a short text tonight when she got home didn’t look too eager but also didn’t look like she was not interested at all.

 

Watching the bus pull up I spotted plenty of smiling faces so I guessed that they had made it through to the next round. After saying goodbye to Julia, Charlotte bounded over to me and gave me a big hug.

“We got through Mum”

“I knew you would” I replied as we headed towards the car.

“I’ve done lasagne for tea, I hope you are hungry? And you can tell me all about it”

“Yes that sounds great Mum” Charlotte responded as she looped her arm through mine and we headed home.

 

Once in her room later Charlotte reached for her phone and typed in Mitch’s number and then paused. ‘What should she write?’ in the end she decided to keep it simple and wrote ‘It was great to meet you today hope we can stay in touch between now and the next round, Charlie x’ Then she turned to her Mum’s diary for a few pages before sleeping as she still felt so hyped up from the competition and meeting Mitchell.

 

Friday 19
th
March, 1988

 

It’s James’ turn to phone this evening and I can hardly wait to hear his voice again. This week has dragged by so much but at least I had sent and received another letter and I have my memories of the weekend to relive as often as I liked.

“Hi James” I answered, as his deep voice filled my ears and at the same time sent a tingle down my spine.

“Hi Steph, how’s your week been” James asked.

“Ok, so much course work to get finished” I said

“Keep at it, I know I was pretty lax at school except in subjects that I liked” he replied “So my next free weekend is the Easter one” he finished.

“That’s great news, only two weeks to wait until we see each other again” I breathed. I was positive he could hear the happiness in my voice.

“My Mum says it’s ok for you to stay at ours. You’ll be in my room and I’ll be in the spare room” I replied

“It will save me sharing with Chris, I’d much rather share with you” James said, his voice low so that his parents wouldn’t hear him. I was lucky to have the phone in my room now so I could talk more freely.

“I loved sharing a bed with you” I replied. I could feel the heat in my cheeks as I remembered all that had taken place over our weekend together. It seemed so distant already.

 

“I’ve got an interview for the Fire Brigade next Tuesday” James said.

“Wow, that’s great news you’d better let me know how it goes” I replied “I’ll be keeping my fingers crossed for you” I finished. A vision of James in uniform filled my thoughts and I sighed.

“What’s the sigh for” James asked

“Just imagining you in your uniform, you can save me any day of the week” I flirted.

“Well I may need to practice my fireman’s lift next time I see you” he laughed. When we eventually finished our conversation I lay back against my pillows and smiled, my life was fantastic.

 

Feeling sleepy Charlotte leafed through the next few pages as they seemed to be all about school, exams, homework and apart from her Mum’s usual missing James so much at the end of almost each entry there was not much of interest until she reached the Easter weekend entries.

 

Friday 1
st
April, 1988

 

I woke early and after breakfast I got the spare bedroom ready as I told Mum that I would sleep on the small pull out bed and let James have my room instead. Also I knew that I could probably sneak up the flight of stairs to my room once my parents had gone to bed without stepping on any creaky floor boards. I had already arranged with Sarah that we would meet and go swimming on Saturday and she hoped that Chris would come again as since Valentine’s Day she had not even managed to pluck up the courage to go into the video shop. After that I was not sure what we could do but I was sure that between us we could think of some way to pass the time.

 

Just after ten I heard a car pull into the driveway and quickly dashed down the stairs to open the door before my Mum could beat me too it. I ran into his arms as he held me close and breathed in the scent of my freshly washed hair.

“Are you a sight for sore eyes” he responded as he bent down for a quick kiss, aware that my parents might spot us

“You too” I replied as I pulled away and he followed me into the house. We wasted some time over coffee and then eagerly headed up the stairs to my room. He pulled me into his arms and we had a proper hello kiss that literally left me gasping and shaking in his arms as we moved the few yards to the bed and sank onto the duvet so that my legs would stop shaking under his fingertips as they travelled the length of my body. Oh the feel of his touch after a fortnight apart felt like heaven as my body pressed against his in such as way that we felt like one.

 

“Lunch is ready” Mum shouted, so we headed downstairs and then afterwards we walked into town to meet Chris at the video shop.

“Can you invite Chris to come swimming tomorrow as Sarah wants to come” I said, as we walked along together our hands tightly clasped together.

“Sure I can, I like match making” he grinned. We headed through the door of the shop.

“Hi Chris” James said, as I wandered over to the shelves to give them some space to catch up. As I joined the conversation, Chris smiled at me.

“We’ve decided to go to the cinema afterwards” James said, pulling me close.

“Sounds great, I’ll give Sarah a quick call later and check she is free all evening too” I replied.

As we left the shop James gave me a sly wink and I realised that he was just as eager to match make as I was. This was going to be a fun weekend, I could tell.

 

Back at home we watched some television with my parents, feeling it would be a little rude to go to my room too early but by eight I was eager to be in James’ arms again. I was addicted to his touch.

 

Charlotte was startled when her phone beeped and there was a message from Mitchell “It was great to meet you too, are you on Facebook? As we can talk through that as well as with text, I want to get to know you a bit more, Mitch x”

He had signed his with a kiss too, what did that mean? She replied back immediately with her Facebook user name and then as it was late wished him goodnight as she put the diary down and just before sh
e drifted off a text from Mitch wished her goodnight too.

Chapter 1
4

 

The following morning Charlotte woke late but immediately reached for her mobile phone to check Facebook on it, there blinking at her was a friend request from Mitchell Cooke accompanied by a small picture of him looking gorgeous. She immediately accepted the request and then while she tidied her room and finished her home work she waited for the beeps alerting her to messages. There was still nothing when she went down for a sandwich at lunchtime so she quickly phoned Julia for advice, who told her to calm down and just be patient. Her patience was rewarded by a message on Facebook later that afternoon saying Hello and a link to a video clip he had recorded of her groups dance routine from yesterday. Wow he had filmed it; she wished that she had filmed his too.

 

Lying on her bed Charlotte responded to the message and then settled down to an afternoon of more from her Mum’s diary, as now even more so she needed to know what older guys did differently so that she could learn to read between the lines of her messages from Mitch.

 

Saturday 2
nd
April, 1988

 

Creeping up to my room at around midnight I was rewarded when James pulled the duvet aside and I squeezed into my single bed next to him. Once I had set my alarm for six in the morning James pulled me close as we shared some extremely long and devouring kisses before he pulled my nightshirt away from my body. I let his hands wander down to gently bush over my already erect nipples. Then we moved so that I lay beneath him as he ran a trail of kisses down my neck, and lower. Glancing up at me in the semi darkness I nodded my consent for him to continue as I stretched out under his expert touch. As his lips moved carefully over my breasts, I ran my fingers through his short hair and held him there so that he would continue with his kisses. His tongue licked over them as my body melted into hot, burning liquid, I was on fire beneath his touch.

 

James headed lower to my belly button and I tried to stifle my laughter as it tickled too much. When his lips returned to mine I felt his weight crushing me into the mattress, I didn’t mind this as I always seemed to find it hard to breathe easily, even when we were not touching. Then we curled up very tightly together.

“Sorry I laughed when you kissed my belly button” I whispered

“At least I know where it is now, in case of emergency” James whispered back.

“What emergencies”

“The tickling kind” he said as he pulled me into his arms.

His breathin
g slowed and I enjoyed the feel of his taunt muscles around me, I didn’t want to sleep and loose the opportunity to drink in everything I was feeling at this very moment. Before drifting off I vowed that tomorrow night it would be my turn to explore.

 

When the alarm sounded at six, I kissed James gently goodbye and left the room

“I’ll give you a shout when I wake up” I said

“I’d prefer a wake up kiss” James replied, as he watched me creep out of the room. In the spare room sleep eluded me so I ran my hands over my body trying to recreate the feel of his touch. I knew how responsive my nipples were under his fingertips and tongue. I could only guess how good it would be when I let him explore further.

 

I must have slept for the sound of voices downstairs woke me up. I quickly got dressed in my leggings and long jumper and headed down too. James smiled as I entered the room and I sat down next to him as he continued to talk to my Dad about the training involved in becoming a fire man.

“Morning Mum, Dad, James” I said, as Mum passed me a mug of coffee.

After breakfast we headed over to see Chris.

 

Arriving at the pool I saw Sarah waiting for us.

“Hi Sarah” I said, as I linked my arm through hers and we headed into the changing room
.

“So what’s the gossip” she said
.

“Your Valentine card is still on the mantelpiece at Chris’ flat” I said, as we started to get changed.

“Really, don’t tell me surrounded by lots of other cards” she replied.

“No it’s the only one. James told me that Chris told him that he likes you” I finished. I straightened my pony tail and waited for Sarah to emerge from her cubicle.

“Come on then let’s go and have some fun” I said, as we walked out onto the poolside and spotted the guys already in the water at the deep end.

 

James and I spent our time in the pool larking around and trying to get Sarah and Chris to talk by leaving them alone and swimming in other areas of the pool. It did seem to be working and as we headed to the burger restaurant later I watched them taking secret glances at each other, perhaps the cinema would help too.

 

Beetle juice was a fantastic film, I loved every minute of it as we shared popcorn and a drink and it was a shame when the lights came on and we reluctantly left the cinema. As we drove home I spotted that Sarah was holding hands with Chris the same as I was with James, this was a definite result and I couldn’t wait to talk to her after the weekend. Once we were back at home we headed straight upstairs to my bedroom and put some music on.

“So how do you think that went” I asked.

“I think it went very well, just call me cupid” James laughed, as he stretched out on the bed and I followed suit.

“So how was your interview” I asked

“Good I think; I’m just waiting for a letter to confirm the next stage” he said, casually stroking my arm.

“Radio DJ is that even a proper job” James continued, smiling at me.

“A very important job, entertaining people” I retorted “I’m hoping to get some practice in by applying for some work experience at Hereford Hospital”

 

What I really wished I could say was that I just wanted to be with him forever and that I loved him so much it hurt when we were apart. In the pause I crawled onto his lap and started to kiss him as my hands entwined in his hair and he lay back so that I was on top of him.

 

Sitting astride I was filled with desire and longing so strong that I was brave enough to run my hands down and then un button his shirt so that I could feel skin on skin running my hands over his smooth chest.

“Do you like having your nipples kissed?” I asked,

“I don’t know, no one has ever tried it before” he replied “so you will be the first” With a smile I dipped my head and cautiously at first kissed his nipple and then the other before I looked up.

“Feels great” he breathed as he reached up and pulled my jumper over my head and his eyes drank in my body and his hands reached around to try and find the catch on my bra. He looked at me puz
zled as the strap was smooth, and I giggled and reached up to release the front catch and as it slipped from my shoulders his hands explored.

 

He worked his belt buckle free and then I helped pull his jeans down, trying not to notice the bulge in his boxer shorts that literally terrified me. As he did this I wiggled out of my leggings and then I laughed out loud

“What’s so funny” James said

“Us in just our underwear and socks” I giggled.

Quickly we took off our socks and
ducked under the duvet together as our hands and tongues took turns to explore, avoiding all tickly areas. I heard my parents head up to bed as we paused but then instead of heading down to the spare room I stayed with James. Luckily my alarm was still set for six as I struggled to leave James and head for the spare bed.

 

Sunday 3
rd
April, 1988

 

I was awake before James this morning and we spent the morning lazing around. My grandparents were coming over for dinner that night and James had been drafted in as a substitute for the local six aside football tournament with Chris so I wrapped up and went with him to watch. It was quite a game and I enjoyed gazing at James in his shorts and t-shirt. The home team won and afterwards we headed to the local pub for a drink. As I was still underage I settled for a glass of coke and enjoyed my first ever visit to a pub. Some of the other guys in the team had girlfriends the same age as them, I noticed them looking at me and wondering why James was with me. James noticed I was feeling uncomfortable under their gaze and put his arm protectively around my shoulders.

 

We shared a portion of chips while we were there before we headed back to mine. After a shower we sat and chatted to my parents and my Nan and Granddad. I think James was a little nervous at meeting them but he soon settled into the conversation over the dinner table and answered all their questions and complimented my Nan on her hairstyle. I thought I saw her blush but she gave me a smile and I could tell that she definitely approved of my choice in men.

 

Then we excused ourselves and headed to my room to listen to some music and do some more exploring. I was officially addicted to the feelings that were coursing through my body every time we touched. Tonight James started at my feet and after removing my shoes he reached up and pulled off my jeans and socks, careful not to tickle my feet he ran his hands up my long legs. His fingers carefully touched the lace of my knickers but as I stiffened he continued upwards and I was able to breathe again. As his fingers took in the familiar warmth of my breasts and the tight bud of my nipples as his lips followed his hands, whilst mine entangled in his blond hair. He pulled back to look at me once more as he peeled off his clothes and my hands felt the solidness of his muscles beneath his smooth skin.

 

Once we were under the duvet he reached for my hand in his and then slowly took it down over his chest to the point where the waist band of his boxer shorts lay. All the while his eyes held my gaze and his lips touched mine with such longing and need that my whole being melted away.

“Will you?” he asked me, as he pushed his hands down further to remove his boxer’s. Oh my god, I was about to touch him, all of him, was I brave enough?

Cautiously I stroked my finger down through his curly hair to a point and then I hesitated.

“What do I do?” I mumbled, suddenly embarrassed by my lack of experience. “Do whatever feels right”
he breathed as his lips captured mine once more.

 

Ever so gently I touched the whole shaft, which seemed to make it spring up even harder and larger. I stroked up and down with my fingers, taking in the feel of it, all I could think was how huge it was, it was never going to fit inside me. I felt the immense power that my touch seemed to have upon James as his breathing increased and his kisses became longer and deeper. I withdrew my fingers and paused for breath. Was he disappointed that I had stopped? I couldn’t tell as I pushed my body tightly into his embrace.

“Not bad for a first go” he smiled at
me; it was almost like he could tell what I was thinking and how nervous I was feeling. His arms wrapped tightly around me as we drifted off to sleep. I felt even more aware of his whole body pushed up against my back, separated by only my thin piece of fabric.

 

Charlotte breathed out, only just aware that she had been holding her breath as she had read the last entry. Her Mum had been scared, just like she had when she had touched Craig for the first time. He had been pushing her hard at that point and she remembered how she had pushed him away from her body and he had turned away in anger that she had not been ready for anything further. What a difference having an older guy obviously meant. Charlotte assumed that her Mum had not been James’ first sexual encounter and guessed that perhaps once a guy had done it a few times that they didn’t mind taking things slowly. Or perhaps James was just a rare gentleman and her Mum had been extremely lucky to have found a guy who was happy to take things at her pace and not his own. She headed back to the diary, keen to see what would happen next.

 

Monday 4
th
April, 1998.

 

The alarm didn’t get need to sound this morning as I was already awake and just happy to drink in the sight of James lying next to me. He stirred slightly as I trailed my fingers over his cheek and lent down to kiss him, before I reluctantly headed back to the spare room. Without his arms around me the spare bed felt cold and empty, pretty much like my life when we were apart.

 

Over breakfast we tried to decide what to spend our last few hours together doing. As it was a nice bright spring day we decided to go for a walk along by the river. Holding hands with James as we wandered along, talking about general things like my impending exams and his interview and avoiding the inevitable parting that loomed like a black cloud above us.

 

Sitting on a bench we watched the swans sail by before James turned to me

“I hate h
aving to leave you all the time. I wish I still lived here”

“I do too” I agreed “Then we could see each other every day”

“Yeah, that would be great” he replied as his finger traced a heart onto the palm of my hand

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