We're Working On It (22 page)

Cory cried after reading that letter. He missed Mike. Until that moment, Cory had never understood what a true friend Mike was, no, is. Kevin had taught him what a friend really means and how sacred that relationship is, and Cory now understood. Mike would always be there for him, no matter where he was.

Fifteen

The Taking

A week had gone by and school droned on, but there was a feeling of togetherness that this group had never before experienced. Cory was finally happy, truly happy. Life was finally coming together for him.

As school ended he thought of his friends as he walked out the doors to face the sun. His life was coming together. He was out to the people that mattered in his life. He had a boyfriend who loved him, that was going to share his life, no matter where it went or they went. He wanted nothing more than to be with them right now.

Within minutes all three boys had hooked up and were walking together towards the soccer fields to leave the school and head for home. Cory had stopped riding his bike as neither Kevin nor Matt had bicycles. He preferred just walking with his friends. Many other students were passing them as they walked slowly, but Cory didn’t care. He was with Kevin and Matt again.

Hey guys,” Cory said to both of them, “What do you say that we get jobs together this summer? It would be great if we could stay together over the summer.”

“That’d be so cool,” Matt said. Cory knew that Matt was now daydreaming about the three of them staying together over the summer.

“Do you know any place that has openings?” asked Kevin. Cory didn’t answer because he had spotted Johnny standing up ahead across the soccer field. His mind was shifting away from the pleasant thoughts of working together with his friends to that sickening gnawing feeling in his stomach. Something didn’t feel right.

Johnny was standing still, feet slightly spread apart with defiance, just staring at the threesome. Cory stopped walking and stood still, staring back at Johnny. He looked to his side and saw that Kevin had also stopped walking. Both boys continued to stare at Johnny, knowing that something was up.

Matt hadn’t seen Johnny yet as he continued walking forward, lost in his daydream. Finally Matt realized that he was alone and turned back to see where his friends had gone.

“Hey, what’s up?” Matt asked.

Cory was quiet for a second.

“Johnny’s up ahead and I think he means trouble.” Cory said with seriousness in his voice.

Matt turned around and saw Johnny for the first time. Johnny was too far away to be certain, but he felt that Johnny’s eyes appeared to be red, and the dust from the fields was sticking to the outlines of tear streaks on his cheeks.

The silence was broken by Johnny’s scream.

“Matt. YOU FUCKING PERVERT! What have you been saying about me?”

All motion on the soccer field stopped. Everyone started watching the scene unfold before them.

Matt just stood and watched Johnny.

“Answer me, queer boy. What have you been saying about me?” Johnny yelled again.

“Ah. Nothing. Nothing, really,” Matt finally was able to answer.

Johnny was still about 50 feet away. “Like hell you haven’t.”

Matt fell to the ground as Cory and Kevin were splashed with blood. A millisecond later, the sound of a gunshot was heard. Disbelief was showing on the faces of every kid and teacher present. Slowly the realization of Johnny standing alone holding a pistol in his right hand came to focus in everyone’s minds. Matt lay bleeding on the school playground.

But no one moved, watching a picture out of Time magazine, a moment of great emotional trauma, frozen in time.

Cory didn’t know what was happening, but then the truth finally hit him. The truth crushed him.

“NOOOOO!” Cory screamed as loud as his lungs could force out the air. He dropped to the ground and tried to pick up his friend, Matt. The truth raced through him as he knew Matt was dead but prayed it not be so.

“Matt! Matt! Don’t be... Oh God. How did this happen? HOW!?” Cory continued to scream. He was now crying openly, tears streaming down his face as he held Matt’s body close to his heart.

He looked up and through blurry, tear filled eyes he saw Johnny still standing alone. Cory was scared. What was going to happen next, he wanted to know. He saw that no one was moving toward Johnny to stop him, and people were actually backing off.

Hatred of Johnny, hatred of the school, hatred of his teachers, hatred of anyone in authority welled up within him and his fear was gone. He felt nothing except rage at the boy in front of him that had just ended a dream.

Cory bolted upright and started racing toward Johnny with every ounce of energy that he could muster. The water puddles on the playing field exploded under Cory’s feet as they hit the ground. He kept getting closer to Johnny, each racing step another watery explosion.

Johnny saw Cory coming at him and brought the gun up and took aim at Cory.

Closer.

Cory knew of nothing but Johnny.

Cory didn’t see the gun aimed at him, and Johnny slowly pulled the trigger again.

Misfire.

Closer – watery explosions growing more rapid. Johnny brought the gun down and hit it with the palm of his hand, several times trying to get the hammer to come back. It seemed to free itself as the hammer suddenly re-cocked, and just as he brought the pistol back to aim at Cory, Cory dove into Johnny and was inside of Johnny’s arms as the gun barrel erupted.

The bullet went wild into the air as Johnny was knocked backward by the force of Cory’s attack. The gun was knocked out of Johnny’s hand by the blow and landed on the ground several feet away.

Cory was in a rage, his rational being no longer existed. Cory hit Johnny again and again with his fists without realizing what he was doing. Cory knew nothing of the world around him except for Johnny in front of him.

Teachers still too shocked to move, still watching, suddenly began running toward Johnny and Cory.

He now realized that he was being confined. His arms held, couldn’t move them anymore. His mind finally cleared as he began to calm down. Cory was being held by his gym coach and his Geometry teacher, Mr. Parks.

Johnny had been grabbed and thrown to the ground by two teachers and two other students. He was being tightly held.

Someone screamed to a teacher, “Call the fucking police.”

Panic and pandemonium had broken out at the school. Thoughts of Columbine raced through everyone’s mind and students as well as staff were either running away, hiding behind whatever they could find or standing still, crying.

Cory looked around and he then focused on his teacher.

“Mr. Parks, PLEASE, I’ve got to go see Matt,” Cory pleaded.

The coach and the teacher let Cory’s arms go and followed as Cory ran back to where Matt lay on the ground. Kevin was on his knees just behind Matt looking up in the sky. He was openly crying.

Cory slowed his run as he approached and kneeled down next to his boyfriend. He put his arms slowly around Kevin and started to sob. They held onto each other for an eternity, neither of them wanting to move, completely wrapped up in each other’s grief.

Cory looked down at Matt as someone spread a blanket over Matt’s lifeless body. He realized that it was over. Matt was gone.

Shaking like an old man, Cory slowly got to his feet. The gravity of what had happened had hit him with the force of an on rushing train. Cory screamed.

“You are all to blame for this. Johnny only pulled the trigger. He was doing just what you all wanted, what you ordered, every one of you!”

Parks started to put his arm around Cory’s shoulder, but Cory forcibly pushed his hand away. He looked into Mr. Park’s eyes with hatred for a moment and then turned away and started to run. Tears were streaming down his face, and he wanted to run forever, to get away from all of this, to not have had it happen.

Cory ran down the middle of the street, past homes, past the park, past the nothingness around him. He wondered if anyone in the homes knew what had just happened. Cory slowed as he approached his own house, and he saw that the garage door was open and there was no car in the driveway or the garage. Richard was not home.

Cory had left the school just before the police had arrived, and the school was locked down immediately to protect the students and staff. No one knew if Johnny had acted alone in the school shooting. Johnny was being taken away by a force of four officers as a SWAT team began to search the school in case another shooter was involved. The school was in panic, and the town was about to erupt.

Not wanting to go inside to an empty house, Cory sat on the curb in front of the house, waiting for Richard to come home. Cory was visibly convulsing.

Richard first heard about the shooting when one of his employees ran into his office.

“Get the news on, now! There’s been a shooting at Cory’s high school,” he yelled.

Richard immediately went blank, panic enveloping him as he thought of his son. He grabbed the remote and pushed the ‘on’ button, waiting for the tragedy to show itself. He prayed it not be Cory.

Police patrol cars, lights screaming, were everywhere on the screen. A female reporter was on the right side of the screen speaking into a microphone, but all Richard heard was, “...the shooting was fatal. We don’t know the boy’s name yet...”

Richard threw the remote, and almost broke the door off its hinges as he ran from his office.

As his car skidded around the last corner and approached the house, Richard could see a figure sitting on the curb. He strained to see who it was, and thought he recognized the figure.

‘Oh God, there’s blood,’ raced through his mind.

Richard’s face finally showed relief, and then dread, as he recognized Cory sitting on the curb. He saw that Cory had his head bowed down in between his knees. He looked terrified, but, Cory was alive. Richard’s greatest fear, the thing that he feared more than anything else hadn’t happened. His son was alive!

As the car slowed and approached the driveway, Richard jumped from the car and ran toward Cory.

Cory continued to shake, but looked up sharply at the sound of the car door slamming. Recognizing the car, and feeling the safety of Richard coming to get him, he tried to scramble to his feet, but only fell forward to his knees. He needed the safety of Richard and continued his scramble toward the car. Cory screamed as he approached the car and could finally see Richard.

“They killed him! They killed him!”

Cory collided with Richard, buried his head in his shoulder, sobbing uncontrollably.

Richard held Cory in his arms, burying him in an attempt to calm him. He glanced at the house and started to pull Cory towards the front door.

“Let’s go inside Cory, now!”

Cory wouldn’t let go of Richard, but Richard slowly started to move with him toward the front door.

As they entered the house, Cory began to feel the safety. He was home. Richard sat with him on the sofa, keeping his arms wrapped around him.

“Oh God, Richard, they killed him,” was all that Cory could manage to get out. He kept repeating those words over and over and over again.

“Killed who? Who was killed? Did you know him?”

“They killed Matt!” Cory screamed.

“Who? What? What happened, Cory?”

Richard began to shake as he heard the sound of Matt’s name. “Who killed him?”

“Everyone,” Cory screamed.

Cory could not stop crying but needed to tell him. Slowly, Cory tried to speak of what had happened, but he had trouble uttering the first word – couldn’t get it out. After a few aborted attempts, Cory swallowed hard. He had to do this.

“We were walking home from school today...” Cory began.

He told Richard everything that had happened on the school soccer field that afternoon, the shooting, the panic, the fear. When he had finished, he was drained. He continued his hold onto Richard and slowly began to relax. Cory had no strength left, his entire body had collapsed. He actually started to fall asleep.

Richard helped Cory to Cory’s bedroom, put him into his bed and pulled the covers over him. He knew he was already fast asleep. Cory needed that safety.

As Richard stood, he turned to look at the sleeping Cory. Richard then looked into the air. As the tears were streaming down his cheeks, Richard spoke softly to Cory although Cory couldn’t hear him.

“Cory. I don’t know what to do, son. I hope you can get through this, but I fear that your life will never be easy. Prejudice and fear will be like an anvil around your neck for the rest of your life.”

Richard saw the future and his anger billowed within him.

“Fuck your school. Fuck this town. Fuck our whole damned society for allowing this to happen.”

He was enraged.

Richard bit his lip as he turned from Cory’s room and found his way downstairs to the TV room. He had to ‘find’ his way, because he didn’t recognize just where he was walking. As the sun was fading from the day, Richard found himself sitting on the sofa in the living room alone watching the television. Wolf Blitzer was telling the CNN audience that there was only one boy killed and that they thought only one boy was involved in the shooting, he had no accomplices. There was speculation that the shooting had occurred because of a personal disagreement between the two. There was also an unconfirmed report that the victim’s sexual orientation was in question and may have prompted the shooting.

Richard immediately turned off the television and stared at the ceiling.

Suddenly the telephone rang, bringing him back to reality. He stared at the telephone for a moment, not wanting to answer, but reluctantly, he picked up the receiver from the side table next to him.

“Mr. Mathews?” was heard from the phone.

“Yes?”

“My name is Ryan Baker. I’m a school counselor at Cory’s high school. Is Cory there?” Richard didn’t answer right away. “Yes, he’s here, but....”

“Mr. Mathews,” the counselor interrupted.

“...he’s not going to be able to come to the phone just now.”

“Mr. Mathews. Please listen to me for a moment.”

Richard went silent.