Wellesley Wives (New England Trilogy) (51 page)

“I hear you.”

“What are you going to do about Marcus?

Rosie winced. “I don’t know. Maybe a trip to Ireland would be a good idea?”

Her mom laughed. “You can’t run away. He’s your husband, and you have Natasha to think about. You’ll have to work it out. You know, your dad and I had our arguments, too. We tried to keep them hidden from you, but every marriage has friction. If it didn’t, it would be a very dull marriage.”

“But there’s a difference between friction and World War III,” Rosie said.

“I guess the more passion there is in the good times, the more passion there will be in the bad times.”

“Lucky us,” Rosie said.

“What do you make of Lily?”

“Wow, that was a hell of a bombshell. I certainly didn’t see it coming—ditched by an oldie.”

Her mom laughed. “Hey, watch what you say about oldies.”

“Natasha did very well.”

“What do you mean?”

“Did you see the necklace she was wearing? I assumed it was a piece of costume jewelry, but then I had a closer look. Lily gave her a platinum and diamond-encrusted Tiffany’s key on an beautiful diamond-studded chain.”

“What?”

“Nat said Lily told her she was finished with it. Needless to say, I traded it for a chocolate chip cookie.”

“Rosie!” Popsy looked appalled.

“What? I couldn’t let her keep it. She would lose it. I talked to Lily, and evidently it was a present from Jack she no longer wanted. I told her I would keep it safe and she could give it to Natasha when she’s around sixteen.”

“Good thinking. Poor Lily.” Popsy sighed.

“Other than the wealth, I don’t know what she saw in him in the first place, but I’m guessing her self-esteem will be at an all-time low after this.”

Her mom looked pensive. “Unless . . .”

“Unless what?”

“Unless Jack did the first decent thing he’s ever done in his life. Natasha said that Jack wanted Lily to have babies. Maybe he let her go because he loved her and wanted her to have a full life.”

Rosie slapped her forehead. “Mom, you’re too much of a romantic. I don’t think Jack is that benevolent.”

“Maybe not,” her mom said with a shrug. “So you see, you’re not the only one with problems in your life.” Then she stood and put her hands on her hips. “Now, up to bed you go. We’ll both have a good night’s rest and tomorrow we can have a proper think about how to get Marcus to calm down and get you guys back together. Okay?”

Rosie stood and wrapped her arms around her mother who was a good two inches shorter than she. “Okay, Mom. You’re the best. Thanks.” She started to walk away but then turned around. “Oh, by the way, I was wondering. Have you given any thought to your future with Matilda?”

Popsy shook her head. “I really don’t know. The truth is, I don’t need her that much now that there’s only me and Sandra to look after, but we don’t even know where we’ll be living soon enough. Then there’s the cost of keeping her, which I really can’t afford anymore.”

Rosie put her hand on her mom’s wrist.

“Mom, I would love it if Matilda came to live with us. She’s an incredible help with Natasha, and they love each other. I wouldn’t have asked if you’d said you wanted to keep her.”

“Are you kidding? It would be the perfect solution,” her mom said and hugged her. “You see? Things have a way of working themselves out.”

Sunday morning should have been a late start, but Popsy and Sandra were up with the dawn because their bodies were still on European time.

“I’m going for a run,” Sandra said. “I think I gained a few pounds in Ireland.” She groaned.

“Knock yourself out.” Popsy laughed. “I’m going to have all-American pancakes. They really don’t know how to do them over there. Not even at The Four Seasons.”

“Oh, good idea. And I want some burned toast smothered in coarse-cut marmalade.” Sandra looked at Popsy and smiled. “I think you’re glad to be home.”

“I am. My girls need me, and I love this old house.” She looked around her kitchen and stroked her beloved pine table. “That said, I know things are about to change. We’ll have to make some plans now that we’re home.”

“Let me go on my run. You cook up your all-American breakfast, and after that we’ll go through your mail and talk about our options. We’re in this together, kiddo, don’t forget that.”

It wasn’t long before Natasha turned up, pulling her mother by the hand. Rosie was just awake. Her hair was messy and she was rubbing her eyes. It looked like she’d slept in a baggy, creased T-shirt.

“I smell pancakes!” the little girl squealed with delight. “Aunt Lily makes great pancakes, too.”

“Oh, Rosie, I’m sorry you didn’t get to sleep in. Would you like coffee?” Popsy asked as her daughter flopped into a kitchen chair.

Sandra poked her head around the door. “Morning, Rosie.”

“Oh, I thought you were gone,” Popsy said.

“I was heading out, but I found this guy hovering around outside looking like a lovesick puppy.” She pulled Marcus into the kitchen by his sleeve.

“Daddy!” Natasha ran toward her father at full-force. Marcus lifted her up into his arms and kissed her all over her face. “Oh, baby, it’s so good to see you.”

Popsy glanced at Rosie who was manically pressing her hair down and sitting up a little straighter. It was obvious she still loved Marcus. That was a good place to start.

“Will you have a coffee, Marcus?” Popsy asked as if his arrival was the most normal thing in the world.

He looked nervous. “Uh, yeah, that would be great. Thanks, Popsy.” Then he looked at Rosie. “Can we talk?”

“Natasha, I need your help to make the pancakes as well as Aunt Lily does them. Will you show me how she does it?” Popsy asked. Nat seemed excited to move on to higher callings like Pancake Cook.

Marcus and Rosie walked into the drawing room where they could talk in private.

“I’m sorry,” he said, looking at her with desperation on his face. “I had no right to fly off the handle like that. I was totally in the wrong, and everything you said was right. This vacation was my idea. I pushed it on you, and I’m sorry I got so jealous.”

Rosie sat on her mother’s sofa and let him talk.

“I see some of the guys at work having affairs, and I didn’t want to do that, but I was curious about what they had, what I was missing. This was the only way I could figure out how we could explore it, and yet stay open and honest. Rosie, I don’t know how you feel about other guys, but you’re by far the best woman I’ve ever been with. What I mean is, it’s different with you. It’s real. It’s us.”

“You think that now?” she asked calmly. “Funny. That’s not what you’ve been saying for the last week in Mexico. Down there it was all ‘great’ and ‘wild.’ ” Rosie rolled her eyes. “In Mexico I was the one who was being dull and conservative. What is it you said? I should live a little and loosen up? Stuff like that.”

Marcus began to pace the floor. “I admit it, in Mexico I did try, but it’s only when I got back here—alone last night—that I was able to think clearly. Empty sex is crap sex.”

“Ha,” she interrupted him. “Ha and double ha. Jesus, you couldn’t get enough of it last week, Marcus. Anytime, anyplace, anywhere. You were at it like a jackrabbit. And me? I made a friend. That was my big sin. I found a nice guy to talk to. How in the hell do you think talking with someone could be as bad as what you were doing?”

Marcus stopped pacing. “Look, Rosie, I came over here to say I’m sorry. Really, I am. I love you and Natasha. Can we please go home?”

She looked at her husband—the man she’d loved so much for so long—and for the first time in her life, she wasn’t so sure. “You made me do that, Marcus. You railroaded me into a horrendous situation, a situation you knew I didn’t want to be in, and now that we’ve done it, you’re sorry. Well, I have to tell you, I don’t think that’s enough.”

“What?”

Rosie was surprising even herself. “I know that maybe Natasha might have come into our lives a little while before we planned it, but you proposed of your own free will. I never pushed you into that.”

“I never said you did.” He combed his hands through his hair.

“No, but I think a big part of me was seeking forgiveness for getting pregnant before we were married.” She shook her head. “But I don’t feel that way anymore. I’m very comfortable with the person I am. I have a daughter and family I adore. You, on the other hand? I really don’t know if I even know this reckless, marauding asshole you’ve turned into.”

“Asshole?”

“Yes, Marcus, an asshole! What would you call a guy who forced his wife into a swingers’ resort?”

He looked confused. “I didn’t force you, I might have convinced you, but I didn’t force you.”

She needed to think about this. She heard Natasha squealing with pancake-making-delight in the kitchen. There was her daughter to think about, too.

“So that man . . . Sam?” Marcus asked sheepishly and sat on the sofa, but with at least two feet between them.

“Like I said, he was just a guy in the same boat as I was—literally.”

“Yeah, he took you out on a boat.” He looked hurt. “But you didn’t have sex?”

She shook her head. “His wife is into all that swinging stuff. I think you even met her.” She used air quotes when she said the word
met
. “But Sam and me? We just talked. And the day we went into town, we went on a commercial tour boat. It was a public cruise. Nothing odd or intimate about it. He was a great guy, and I was happy for his company, because it saved me from all the other lechers.”

Marcus looked wounded. “Like me.”

“Look, Marcus, I did it your way. We tried that stupid swinging thing. But I’m telling you, if that’s what you want, you’re on your own. I’m not into that, and I know I’m not the young, wild thing you married. I’ve changed, but I’m glad I’ve changed. Now I’m a wife and a mother, and for what it’s worth, I’m proud to carry those new labels—or at least I was. Now I’m not so sure about being your wife. For me and Natasha, I think life is about moving on together and evolving to fit our new circumstances. What you’re grasping at, what you want me to be, that’s gone. It sounds a little like Jack Hoffman where you’re constantly looking for a newer, younger model.”

Marcus jumped up. “No, that’s not me. That’s what I’m trying to say.” He paced the floor again. “I was so stupid. I don’t want those women. I want you. You’re magnificent and beautiful and so much smarter to get all this stuff already. I’d be lost without you, Rosie. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.” He stopped. “I love you. You’re my rock. I need you. Will you please forgive me for putting you through that swingers stuff?”

Rosie stood. “Shhh,” she said. “Somebody will hear you.”

“I don’t care if they hear me shout that I love you and you’re the best thing in my life.”

She was so torn. She loved him, really she did, but he’d put her in an awful position. Yes, a family would be better for Natasha, but what sort of mother would forgive and forget such crazy carrying-on in her marriage?

She looked at the man she once loved so much, but now loved less, and shook her head slowly. “I’m sorry, Marcus but I don’t think I can go back to where we were. You’ve blown that bridge away. I can’t come back to you, into that marriage. I think I would make a pretty crappy role model for Natasha if I did.”

“What are you saying?” He looked crazy-panicked. “I’ll do anything, Rosie.” His eyes welled up with tears. “Don’t leave me. I’ll do counseling, I’ll go to therapy. I’ll do whatever you want, just don’t give up on us!”

She looked at his face with the tears flowing down as freely as her five-year-old. Who was she kidding? She still adored him.

“Okay, okay, we can try.” She was crying now. “But Marcus you risked our marriage and our family just to try and recapture your stupid youth. We really need counseling—both of us. We need to work through this, whatever the hell it was, because it damn near broke us.”

“Yes, yes,” he cried and risked taking a step towards her. “Can I, can I hold you?” he whispered. She had never seen him weep like this. Cautiously she walked back into his arms. “Dear God, in heaven, I love you,” he said as he kissed the top of her head. “I’ll never ever do anything to jeopardize us again, I swear it, Rosie,” he vowed with a trembling voice.

“And you’re going to a doctor to get checked out after all that, that—oh, Jesus . . .”

“Yes, of course. I love you so much. I’m sorry, baby. So, so sorry.”

Their reconciliation was just in time because Natasha had finally run out of patience. She came crashing in through the door. “Here you are! Pancakes are ready.” She looked at her father and tilted her head in concern. “Don’t cry, Daddy, we have plenty of pancakes.” Natasha didn’t spot that her mother was crying, too. She took Rosie and Marcus by the hands and pulled them back into the kitchen.

“Have you got a moment?” Lily asked her big sister.

Rosie nodded. “What’s up?” she asked as Lily walked her into the drawing room.

Lily sat down on her parents’ oversized sofa, put her hands on her lap, and studied her knees. “I’m sorry,” she said. “It seems to be all I’m saying these days. But I really mean it, Rosie. I’m sorry for being so mad at you and judging you the way I did. I see now that I’m the idiot in this family.”

Rosie sat down next to Lily and enveloped her in her arms just like she used to when they were small.

“Shhh, you don’t have to apologize to me. I need to apologize to you.”

But Lily’s eyes had filled with guilty tears. She looked at her sister and argued, “No, everything is my fault. I was so hard on you that day we had lunch. You had the courage to tell me everything, and now I get it. You were just trying to keep your marriage going.” She squeezed Rosie’s knee. “I think we all know at this point that I’m completely clueless when it comes to love.”

“You know more than you think,” Rosie sighed, releasing her sister from her hug but keeping an arm around her shoulders. “You were so right about that swinging vacation. We shouldn’t have gone. I should have stood up to Marcus back when you told me to, but I wasn’t brave enough. Why didn’t I listen to you?”