Walk of Shame (20 page)

"He doesn't deserve
white," I countered as I flopped backwards across my bed.

Goldie's eyes opened when I
jarred her, but otherwise she didn't move from her curled up position on the
pillows at the head of the bed.

"What if you put him on a
plane and send him to me?"

I rolled my eyes. "One
decent phone conversation with the guy and you want me to fly him across the
country for you."

"Hey, he's been screened by
the network far better than anything I could come up with. He's perfectly
dateable, even if you don't want him. Gimme."

"I'll give him your number
the second I reject him."

"Thank you."

"What if he's not the one I
send home?"

"You're messing with me now,
right?"

"It's only Tuesday. The
Walk
of Shame
isn't until Sunday night. Anything could happen between now and
then."

"I thought you weren't going
to keep guys around just for the sake of keeping them around?"

"Yeah. But if I'm not
careful, I'm going to ditch guys so fast that it forces me to pick one before
I'm sure of which one it should be."

"Okay. So, unless the Earth
shifts on its axis, Ardent is not the one for you. How are you feeling about
Drake now, after today?"

I let out a noise that started as
a groan, but quickly turned into a whine. "I want to feel something for
him."

"What do you mean?"

"I like his outlook and
attitude. I like the way he sees things. I really do like him. Just not in the
way this show is trying to elicit."

"Sounds like you've found a
good social networking friend."

"I'd call you a smart-ass,
but I think you're right."

"Emmy, it's all well and
good that you're reinforcing your opinions of those two from last week, but you
still have six more guys. Have you gotten anywhere on where they'll be standing
towards the end of this?"

"Nooo," I moaned into
the phone. "They're all weaving their way into my heart. They all have
their own pace and way of going about it, but they're all doing it."

"Then do me a favor."

"What?"

"Don't freaking whine and
cry about having two that aren't. You have six good guys, that you're attracted
to in varying degrees, vying for your attention."

"Point taken. Thanks for the
perspective check."

"You're welcome. Now, any
colors decided?"

"Mike is red."

"Why?"

"Because, he puts me at
ease. There's a quiet way about him, and it relaxes me. He's run with me in the
morning a few times, and he totally doesn't annoy me."

"Only people who know you
can possibly understand what high praise that is. Did he kiss more than your
forehead this time?"

I frowned. "No."

Chloe laughed. "You sound
irritated."

"Frustrated is more like
it."

"You could try kissing
him."

"I haven't had to initiate
with anybody else," I muttered.

"Maybe that's what he's
waiting for, to be the one you want to chase after."

"But that would feed into
his whole insecurity thing, that's the part I'm least attracted to."

"Cut him some slack. He's
doing this on national television. Maybe he's just trying to preserve some
semblance of pride. And if he fears you're keeping him around for ratings or to
satisfy some sort of diversity requirement, he's probably just protecting his
heart."

"What if he doesn't feel
that way for me and is just along for the ride?"

"Then why the hell would he
keep showing up to run with you, off camera?"

"Yeah."

Goldie's head popped up and she
gave a soft 'woof' as her head snapped towards the window.

I got up and looked out.
"Oh. My. Goodness."

Chloe got excited, "Is it
Trevor?"

"Nope."

"Then who is it?"

"It's Liam," I
answered, a little stunned.

"It's after midnight! What's
he doing?"

"He's in the hot tub next to
my pool."

"Ooooo, he's waiting for
you."

"How does he know I'm awake?
I was laying here in the dark!"

"Maybe he's just hoping
you're up and will notice him."

"Maybe he just needs a break
from the group and figured I'd be asleep, so he thought coming down here would
get him some alone time."

She let out a disgusted snort.
"If he wanted to be alone, he could have spent the night in his rig. But
he isn't. He came down there to see if he could lure you outside."

I snorted. "Maybe I should
wait and see what else he does."

"Don't be stupid. Go on out
there and see what he has up his sleeve!"

I smiled. "Well, if you
insist," I said and hung up on her. I watched him for a moment, his head
tilted back on the tub edge, enjoying the massaging jets, before I moved into
the bathroom to change into my bikini.

I tiptoed down the stairs,
grabbed a couple hard lemonades out of the fridge, and opened the front door as
quietly as I could. A small, smug smile appeared on his face, even though his
eyes had remained closed. My smile broadened at knowing he'd heard me.

I had a small internal debate
about whether or not I should just stand there until he doubted himself and had
to look. In the end, though, I figured being stuck in a house with seven others
guys, who were all dating the same person he was, was enough of a hoop to jump
through. I walked over, stepped down into the spa, and chose the spot next to
him.

"Couldn't sleep?" I
asked and handed him one of the bottles.

"I probably could, if I had
tried," he said, taking the bottle and unscrewing the cap. "How about
you?"

"Well, I was about to turn
in, but something more interesting came up."

"The house is completely
dark, what were you doing in there?"

"Talking to my sister on the
phone."

"How's that going?"

"Well, I figure she's either
trying to keep me sane through all this, or she's trying to figure out who she
wants for herself."

He laughed. "Are the
producers aware of her possible plans?"

"I don't think so. Maybe I
should warn them. I wouldn't put it past her to show up here."

"So you're not the only
rule-breaker in the family?"

I chuckled. "Nope."

"And do you like it when a
guy breaks the rules, as well?"

I took a swallow from my bottle.
"I came out here to be with you, didn't I?"

"How do your parents feel
about your leaving for long stretches of time, moving around the country the
way you do?"

I moved to relax back against the
wall behind me and Liam extended his arm, inviting me to lounge against his
side, which I did. "I think my Dad has a certain level of pride in that
I'm adventurous enough to do it, even if he does worry about me being out
there. And Mom, well, let's just say she's never been one to break any rules.
So she doesn't get it, doesn't like it, but realizes it's futile to try and
stop me."

"How do you appease
her?"

I smiled and snuggled a little
closer. "Technology is a wondrous thing. We instant message and text, and
she usually calls a few times a week."

"Usually?"

I sighed. "She can't handle
what I'm doing now. She hasn't contacted me since I left to come here."

"Does that worry you?"

"No, I know Chloe is talking
to her. She'll be fine with me just as soon as this is all done."

"How would she deal, if you
left the country for a spell?"

"She'd come to terms with
it."

"How would you feel about
leaving the country?"

"As long as I was
comfortable in the country I was visiting, I'd be content. I just would very
much like for my children to know their grandparents."

"All their
grandparents?"

"Of course."

"So, all the traveling isn't
just something you're getting out of your system? You pretty much want to keep
up this way of life until retirement, maybe?"

"That's my current
plan."

"And you're good with
mountains?"

"I'm very good with being
around mountains."

"How about being up on them
for a few weeks at a time, totally self-sufficient?"

"Hmm, see, now you're
messing with my ability to connect with the internet and shower every
day."

"You can get clean and
conserve water at the same time. And there are ways to get you connected to the
internet, provided you don't require a constant connection."

"So," I twisted against
him to face him, "what made you come seek me out in the dead of the
night?" I whispered.

He tightened his arm around me.
"I wanted five minutes where I didn't have to share you with the cameras,
or the other guys."

I smiled. "Well, you've had
your five minutes. Are you ready to go back now?"

His arm pulled me toward him.
"Not quite," he said and reached with his other hand to maneuver me
around to face him fully. "How about five more?"

I moved to straddle his lap on
the bench we were on and whispered, "At least."

He groaned in approval and closed
the small distance between his lips and mine.

We'd only had one other
mouth-to-mouth encounter before, and it had been good. This time was more than
good, it was amazing. Jared brought heat, and Phillip brought flair, but Liam
made it so that I just didn't want to stop. I found myself clinging against
him, engaged in a full-on make out session. And the longer it lasted, the more
aware I became of how little he and I were wearing in that hot tub.

The swimsuit soon became
annoying. On one hand, I was beginning to want it to disappear altogether. The
barrier was a little frustrating. On the other hand, it was small and not
substantial enough to slow us the hell down.

I broke the kiss, bending and
resting my forehead against his chest. I was all but panting, and groaned out
my reluctance to have pulled away in the first place.

He dropped a kiss down on the
back of my head, sighing with his own regret. "There's a part of me that
wants to pick you up and carry you inside that house."

I groaned again, lamenting the
circumstances. "There's a part of me that really wants you to."

He placed his hands on my hips
and gently massaged. "If I didn't think you'd regret it in the morning, I
would."

"I'd regret betraying them,
yes. And I'd be disappointed in myself. There's a certain level of trust going
around, and I'd like to not be responsible for either of us breaking it."

He reached
under my chin and tilted my face up to his. "For now, it's enough to know
that you want to," he whispered and brushed his lips across mine one last
time before moving me off his lap.

Mike was already halfway through
his run before I managed to stumble across the lawn and out onto the track the
next morning. Goldie was running alongside him, having adopted the early
morning run into her new routine.

"Somebody looks like they
had a late night," Mike said when I caught up to him and matched his
stride.

I struggled with what to say. I
didn't know whether or not to make up an excuse about having work to catch up
on, doing late-night interviews, or even just watching a movie. Or should I
maybe tell him the truth? But, I wasn't sure what good could come from that,
under the circumstances. "Yeah, it was."

He gave me a rueful smile and I
could tell he wanted to ask what had kept me up, but, to his credit, he let it
drop. We'd been getting quite chatty on our runs, and I wasn't readily chatting
about this. He had to know that if I wasn't giving an explanation, there must
be a reason.

He stayed with me until I'd
finished my run, instead of leaving at the normal end of his. He just kept
sneaking up on me with how easy he was to talk to. It made him so easily
likeable. But, I worried that while he was moving so slow with the romance,
while we built the friendship aspect, he might end up propelling himself into
the friend-zone without either of us even realizing it.

Was that a messed up way of
thinking? I wasn't sure anymore. Dating all these guys was messing with my
head. I knew that I shouldn't really be comparing one relationship with
another, that I should be viewing them individually. But, when one of the
objectives I had with this setup being to discard a man every week, you just
naturally started comparing and contrasting them.

But, to be fair to Mike, I had to
remind myself that aside from Trevor, he was the only one working on laying a
solid friendship down first. I was dealing with two different approaches to the
same end goal.

And before we parted ways, he
kissed me on the forehead. Again.

I sighed to myself on the walk
back up to the cottage. I wanted to know if there was a true, physical spark.
On the other hand, he'd never kissed my forehead when parting from a workout
before, only after a date. So, in the grand scheme of things with him, it was
progress.

On to my shower, hair, makeup,
and wardrobe routine. No dates today, but an extensive interview session with
Troy was scheduled.

"All right," Troy said.
"We're going to go name by name. You give me a list of pros and cons for
each one. Then, we'll go back and I'll have you elaborate on each point on the
list."

"That's going to take awhile,"
I muttered.

"Yeah, and they'll edit most
of it out. Only clips will be used here and there. And be warned, because we'll
take breaks for you to go change clothes and have your hair adjusted, so they
can weave the snippets throughout the week's episode and not have it look like
you only answered questions like this on one day."

"Ugh."

"Come on, princess. Have a
seat. Let's get started."

Four hours. That's how long it
took. And if I tried to glaze over one of the many points, he'd ask a more
probing question about it to get me to talk more. If I started to lose my
patience and turned snarky, he'd call for a costume change. I'd get up, get
something to drink, move around for a moment, and be more patient when I sat
back down.

It only took five wardrobe
changes before I caught on.

"Can I ask a question?"
I said at the end of his litany of questions.

"Sure."

"You've been doing this for
a few years now. Can you tell who I'll end up with?"

He smiled, then disappeared into
my office and came back out with an envelope and a piece of paper. He leaned
against the wall and wrote something on the paper before folding it up and
putting it in the envelope. He sealed it and waved it at me. "I'm going to
pin this to your empty bulletin board in there. At the end of the season, we'll
see exactly how good I am."

I'd started smiling before he'd
even begun talking. "How often are you right?"

"I'd say fifty/fifty."

I laughed and waved his
ridiculousness away. "Is my surprise ready for tonight?"

"Absolutely,
we'll see how many show up."

"I just told them about the
movie," Troy whispered as he waved me over from the shadows alongside the
house. "They groaned when I gave them the title."

I crept over to him and let him
usher me down into the basement of the main house. "How many do you think
will figure it out?"

"I don't know. None of them
looked too enthused." He gestured to the seats in the media room.
"You might not get anybody," he said as one of the production team
walked through with the disk. "I told them to be down here in fifteen
minutes if they wanted to watch."

"Okay," I said with a
sigh. "If no one shows, I guess I'll just have a quiet couple of hours to
myself."

He smiled. "Enjoy."

"I will."

Someone from production walked
over and placed a tub of popcorn and some sodas on the end table, trying to
finish setting the scene.

I glanced up at the seventy-five
inch TV and smiled. Since I was all but being held as a hostage, not being
allowed out in public without my merry cast of cameras in tow, I couldn't see a
way to go see the newest chick-flick at the theatre. And it had looked really
good to me in the trailers. So, being as connected as my producer friends are,
they got a copy of it for me to privately screen. All of the guys had been told
it would be playing downstairs and that the price of admission was a two-second
blurb at the end, of their opinion, that could be shown on the show as part of
a cross-promotion. But, they were also told that watching the movie, or opting
out of it, was totally their choice.

Troy never mentioned that I would
be here to watch it as well.

I waited until eight, alone,
until the movie started. No one came down. I wrinkled my nose over the
backfiring of my idea just before I decided to make the best of it. I got up
and pulled the couch up close to the screen, to make it feel more like a true
movie theatre. Then I grabbed extra throw pillows from the other seating in the
room, and got comfortable.

The movie was just getting
underway when I heard soft laughter at the doorway. "I was in the shower when
it occurred to me that the only reason they could have for showing a
chick-flick down here was if there was an actual chick in the room to watch
it."

I hit the pause button and tilted
my head to look over the back of the couch to see Mike lounging against the
doorframe. "And are you the only one that had this thought occur to
them?"

"They all looked pretty
occupied with video games when I snuck down the back stairs on my way here."

I moved to the center cushion on
the couch and decided that if one of us didn't use this opportunity to make a
move, then it was likely not going to happen. "Are you staying to
watch?"

"If you're here, I'm
here."

"Then come cuddle with
me," I said with a pat on the cushion next to me.

He gave me a grin and pulled away
from the frame to come take the offered seat. He put his arm across the back of
the couch and I snuggled into his side. Once I was settled, he shifted his arm
to drape across my shoulders. I hit the play button, we focused on the movie,
and were sucked into the storyline.

The cameramen adjusted their
positions to settle in for the two of us to be boring for a while. I think they
actually started paying attention to the movie themselves.

Mike started shifting his weight
from one hip to the other. I sat up to let him adjust positions.

"Sorry, muscle cramp,"
he said.

"No problem." I hit the
pause button, stood, and grabbed our empty cans of soda. "I'm going to use
the bathroom, you get comfy."

When I came back, he had removed
the prosthetic and stretched the remainder of his leg against the back cushions,
his foot stayed on the floor and he had tucked a throw pillow up against his
torso for me.

"You said to get
comfy," he reminded me.

I nodded and sat, finding a
comfortable position leaning back against his chest. "I meant it."

Having settled, we finished the
movie. To his credit, he didn't utter a single complaint or mocking remark as
the female lead got her happy ending. The credits rolled and I didn't sit up.
The screen went black and I didn't move. I just waited, listening to his
breathing.

He gave my shoulders a squeeze
and I could feel him waiting for me to do something, anything, like sit up and
move away.

I twisted in his hold, but didn't
straighten. Our eyes met and I waited.

"Did you want
something?" he asked.

"Yeah," I answered, our
eyes not wavering from the other's.

He reached up, cupped the back of
my head, pulled me forward, and kissed my freaking forehead. Again.

He pulled back and his smug
expression was met with one of frustration.

He smiled. "That's all you
get for now."

"Why?"

"You have seven other guys
kissing you on your mouth. I'd rather be where none of them has gone before.
And as far as I know, none of them aim for your forehead."

"Mike..."

"I don't go around sharing
my woman. I just don't. I know what I signed up for, but I'm having a tough
time with it. The only thing I can come up with is to cover different physical
territory than they are."

I let that roll around in my head
for a moment. "So your answer is to claim a body part of lesser prominence
than what they have claimed?"

He gave me a simmering look.
"Would you rather I claim an area of greater intrigue?"

I dodged that question. "I'm
wondering why you haven't tried."

"Because if you cross into
anything more than kissing with me, it opens the door to you letting others
claim the same spot. I certainly don't want that."

"How long do you figure on
following through with this plan?"

"Until I can deal with the
idea of sharing that mouth with the others."

I pulled away and stood,
gathering our empty cans to throw into the recycling bin.

"You're mad."

"I'm not mad," I
muttered.

"You're something," he
said, his eyes following my movements.

"I'm irritated."

"Why?"

"Because I've gotten past
figuring out who I have a friendly connection to. That brings us to the eight
who are still here. Then, I moved on to figuring out who I have a romantic
connection with. That's going to knock a couple more guys out of here soon. And
now, I'm trying hard to figure out who I have a spark with."

"Spark?"

"Heat. Who makes me want to
melt against them? Your little no kissing rule of self-preservation, which I
respect, is interfering with my ability to determine that."

"Okay. I hear you. But
you're saying there are a couple other guys you can let go of, for sure,
right?"

"Yes."

"So we still have two more
eliminations to go through before you're hard-pressed to figure out who else
can go. Which should give us two weeks, and getting down to six guys, before
it's a real problem for you."

"In theory."

"All right. I'll use that time
to work on getting past the idea of wanting to pulverize the other guys for
touching you. And with any luck, we'll find that heat. Deal?"

"Deal," I said with a
reluctant sigh.

We said our goodnights, with him giving
me a playful grin when he leaned forward to kiss my forehead again, before we
went upstairs and I snuck out of a side door to head back to my cottage.

It was hard to
call the evening a wasted effort. Mike might have been the only one to show up
and still not kiss me, but I did learn a few things. One, Mike is interested in
being more than a friend. Two, he's also the only one who's picked up on enough
of my personality to realize that the movie wasn't about cross-promotion, it
was about my scheming for stolen time. Three, the man was jealous, but
reasonable. And four, when our needs differed, he was ready to hear me out and
propose a compromise. - I don't know if you can ask for much more than that.