Waking Up Gray (26 page)

Gray let out a heavy sigh. She let go of Lizbeth, stood up, and walked to the top of the stairs. “Lizbeth, when you get yourself together, call me. I’ll try to get back as soon as I can.” Gray’s voice was shaky and betrayed her own fear of what was happening to Lizbeth. “I do love you.” She paused there for a moment longer. Lizbeth heard her descend the stairs, and leave through the front door.

They had opened the windows last night. Lizbeth heard Fanny’s voice, from the porch below, “How’s she farin’, Gray?”

“I don’t know. She sure as hell has had a fit and fell in it. I tried to tell her it didn’t make any difference, but she won’t listen.”

“It does make a difference, Gray. She saw the same thing I did. You lost your color when I said that girl’s name. You got unfinished business there and you damn well better get it done, or you’ll lose the one person that might have been what you’ve been pinin’ for all this time.”

“I didn’t ask Dana to come here. I haven’t talked to her in years. I don’t know why she’s here. You, of all people, should know I’ve been done with her for a long time.”

“No, you ain’t been done with her by a long shot. Fanny Gray O’Neal, I know you better than you know yourself. You got wronged. You got fooled. You got lied to. Ain’t never taken to that in yer life.”

Gray defended herself. “Who would?”

“But you took it this time. You took it to heart and you brought it home with you.”

“What else was I supposed to do? You’re not suggesting I should have stayed with her, after…”

“The Gray I raised gets revenge. Like that dye you put in that girl’s shampoo up to the campground. My Gray gets even.”

“I don’t think coloring Dana’s hair blue would have solved anything.”

Fanny chuckled. “No, Gray, I don’t ‘magine it would have.”

Gray’s voice dropped lower. “How do you get even for betrayal? I couldn’t betray her back. There wasn’t any point to it.”

“Darlin’, the best revenge for betrayal is to live your life and be happy without ‘em. Gray, I’m gonna say it plain. You ain’t used the brains God gave you on this one. Sleep walkin’ through the days. Hard headed enough to think you couldn’t be hurt again, if you just never loved anybody else.”

“But Fanny, I’m trying. I let myself fall in love with Lizbeth and look what’s happening. She’s upstairs balling her eyes out, won’t talk to me, and I haven’t done anything wrong.”

“Neither one of you has a lick of courage when it comes to broken hearts. You both had one and vowed never to have one again. Now, you let yourselves fall in love and it scares the hell out of you both. You go on to work. I’ll watch out for Lizbeth.”

Lizbeth listened to the silence. During the conversation her sobbing had subsided. She was concentrating so hard on hearing what the O’Neal women were saying, she forgot to be lost in her misery. She heard Gray clear her throat. When Gray began to speak, her voice was hoarse with emotion.

“I do love her, you know.”

“Which one?” Fanny asked. Lizbeth thought it was a fair question.

Gray reacted to the question angrily. “Dammit Fanny, Lizbeth! I’m in love with Lizbeth.”

Fanny out right laughed this time. “Lord child, I believe you.”

Gray added, solemnly, “Now, if you can just convince her of that.”

Still laughing, Fanny said, “Oh, I’m gonna leave you to your own convincin’. I’ll just try to put her back together before you get home.”

Lizbeth heard Gray say, “Thank you. I love you, old woman.” She knew Gray was hugging her grandmother.

Lizbeth heard the screen door open and shut and Gray was gone. In a few seconds the front door creaked as Fanny entered the cottage downstairs. She closed the door quietly behind her. Fanny’s house shoes made shuffling sounds across the floor below. The noise stopped at the bottom of the stairs. After a moment of eerie silence, Lizbeth heard Fanny speaking softly.

“Minnie, I sure do miss you.”

A moment later, Fanny stood before Lizbeth with her hands on her hips. Lizbeth, upon hearing Fanny’s approach, sat up against the headboard and clutched the sheet to her chest, like a security blanket. Still sniffling and trying not to all out sob again, Lizbeth looked to Fanny for the answer.

“Miss Fanny, what am I going to do?”

Fanny’s approach was straightforward. “You panicked, Lizbeth. Sure as yer born.”

“It overwhelmed me. I couldn’t control it. I treated Gray horribly.” More sniffles followed.

Fanny smiled at Lizbeth. “No, darlin’, I think you scared some sense into her. It’s piss or get off the pot time for Gray.”

Lizbeth didn’t smile. “I think I scared myself.” She was still unable fully to comprehend why she had acted so emotionally to Dana’s call.

Fanny came over and sat on the edge of the bed. She reached out and took one of Lizbeth’s hands. “You and Gray. Such beautiful and smart women and you let your hearts lead you ‘round by the nose hairs. You both got knocked down pretty hard, but that’s life. To lose your child would have been worse. There are so many things that could have been worse. You survived it. You put your life back together and you’re better for it. You are much stronger than you give yourself credit for. You’re just like Gray, lettin’ the fear of the unknown paralyze you. Darlin’, the unknown is what makes life exciting, worth living. Hell, if I knew what the rest of my days had in store for me I’d rather go now.”

Lizbeth managed a weak smile. “You can never go, Miss Fanny. What would Gray do without you?”

“Live happily ever after, I hope. I was thinking you were going to help her out with that and I could go to God knowin’ Gray’s gonna be all right, but if you’re gonna fall apart every time Gray O’Neal is faced with temptation, you’re right to give up now.”

Lizbeth laughed a little. “I’ve had a ringside seat to quite a few of Gray’s temptations. Women flock to her like geese on a cornfield. Last night I saw men checking her out. Everyone falls in love with Gray. I knew I was wrestling with Dana’s ghost, too. I thought I could handle it. I wasn’t prepared for this.”

Fanny’s chuckling accompanied her next pronouncement. “The Lord works in mysterious ways. He brought you here. Put you here for a reason. He put Dana here, too. Gonna bring this boil to a head and be done with it.”

Lizbeth couldn’t help but be amused at Fanny’s practical way of stating the facts. “You do have a wonderful insight, Miss Fanny. Gray’s lucky to have grown up with such a wise woman.”

“Darlin’, when I was y’all’s age, I was crazy as you. Age made me wise; my youthful follies gave me that wisdom.”

Sometimes Lizbeth wished she were recording Fanny. Pearls of profoundness spilled from her mouth endlessly and Lizbeth was worried she wouldn’t be able to remember them all.

“Do you think Gray will forgive me for behaving so badly?” Lizbeth asked.

“I think I’ll leave the forgivin’ and makin’ up to you two. I’ve stuck my nose in as far as I plan to. If I was you, I would get up, fix myself up, and go and make my peace with her, but I ain’t you.” Lizbeth started getting out of the bed, before Fanny finished. Fanny chuckled, adding, “She’ll be back at the dock around ten.”

Just before Lizbeth stepped into the bathroom for a shower, she watched Fanny leave the cottage. Fanny shook her head and laughed, looking up to the heavens. “Lord Minnie, these young’uns is blind with love and lust.”

#

Lizbeth showered, put on her clothes, and got herself together. She still had a few minutes to grab another cup of coffee. Lizbeth made up her mind to find Gray and apologize for her meltdown. She was embarrassed and afraid she might have scared Gray off. How could she explain it had all been a panic attack? She had them infrequently, but when she did, she had no control over her emotions. She heard Gray say she loved her. She knew the whole reaction was over the top and irrational. Now, she had to apologize and fix the mess she’d made.

She double-checked in the bathroom mirror, making sure her eyes did not look like she’d been on a crying jag. The little make-up she wore helped and the redness had almost gone. Lizbeth left the cottage resolved to trust Gray to handle the Dana business. It was a big decision and a hard one to make, but Fanny had said Lizbeth needed to put it in the hands of the higher power, and that, Lizbeth had decided, was a wise choice.

When Lizbeth left the cottage, Fanny was waiting on her porch. She had Gray’s little cooler and a small wicker basket, its contents covered by a red and white checked dishtowel.

“Gray left without taking any food or water with her. I thought I’d pack you two a lunch and maybe she can find the time to eat it with you.”

Lizbeth hugged Fanny. “Miss Fanny, you are the true jewel in the sea.”

“I don’t know about all that, but I’ve seen what happens to you if you get stressed and don’t eat, so I thought somebody ought to feed you. Now, go on get. Relieve her mind, ‘cause she don’t need to be worried about you out on that water.”

Lizbeth made it down to the dock, but Gray’s boat wasn’t tied up. She had not come back yet from her first run. Her next tour was gathering on the boardwalk. Lizbeth made her way through them and walked to the end of the dock. She put the cooler and basket down and peered out over the water. No sign of Gray.

Lizbeth stood at the end of the dock and looked back toward the boardwalk. There were quite a few children in the next group preparing for Gray’s ride to Portsmouth Island. She smiled to herself, thinking how much these kids were going to enjoy Gray’s storytelling. There were several young couples, still in love and enchanted with each other. An older white haired couple held hands and smiled at each other. They had a lifetime of love together. Lizbeth thought you could see it in their eyes, hers still twinkling when she looked at him, his forever on her. Lizbeth wondered if she’d ever have a love like that. They were so rare. Lizbeth imagined it could be that way with Gray, if they could work out their trust issues.

Lizbeth heard a motor slowing down as it approached the mouth of the harbor. She turned to see Gray’s boat make the turn into the “creek.” At the sight of Gray, Lizbeth’s heart began to beat faster. She was so ashamed of her breakdown this morning. Lizbeth hoped she would be able to convince Gray that she didn’t know what happened and she would do her damnedest never to let it happen again. She would make no promises, because promises got broken, but she would make a commitment to work on healing her own hurts and insecurities. She would, however, like Gray to do the same. Lizbeth had come to this realization after her talk with Fanny.

Other people began to join her on the dock. The tour group grew antsy. Lizbeth kept her eyes on Gray, waiting for Gray to see her, hoping for a favorable reaction. Someone stepped up beside her. Out of the corner of her eye, Lizbeth noticed it was a blond woman, but nothing more. Her eyes were glued to Gray.

Gray approached the dock, slowly coming closer and closer. She stood up behind the wheel, readying for the approach. She cut the engine back and idled toward the end of the dock. Lizbeth smiled at Gray’s look of concentration. She still had not noticed Lizbeth on the end of the dock. Once the boat was lined up correctly, Gray took her eyes off the landing and let them travel up to where Lizbeth was standing. Gray’s mouth fell open. Even though the ever-present Ray Bans shielded her eyes, a look of shock and dismay was clear on her face.

Lizbeth realized Gray wasn’t looking just at her in a flash of conscious awareness of the woman beside her. The blonde was almost as tall as Gray. She had a definite Charlize Theron resemblance, almost uncanny. Not the Charlize from “Monster,” by any means, but one of those roles where she oozed sophistication and sex appeal. This woman was drop dead gorgeous. If she walked in a room, heads most definitely would turn. Some necks would be sore in the morning. She certainly stunned Gray.

The recognition came slowly at first. The trickle became a raging river as the memories, of the picture on Gray’s dresser and the Christmas card, rushed into Lizbeth’s head. She had only glanced at the photos and had been mostly looking at Gray. This was
the
“Dana” in the flesh, and Lizbeth suddenly realized what she was up against. The ghost of this woman had been one thing, but the magnitude of her presence hit Lizbeth like a ton of bricks.

Dana smiled down at Gray, who was still stricken, frozen with the look of panic on her face. The only movement she made was when her head followed her eyes slightly, as they darted back and forth between the two women on the dock. Dana saw this too and turned to Lizbeth for the first time. The full effect of Dana’s beauty became all too clear when she smiled at Lizbeth.

She extended her hand and said, “Hello, my name is Dana.” Lizbeth noted the sophisticated accent of a well-educated and aristocratic Texan. Dana continued, “You must know Gray. I’m an old friend.”

Lizbeth reached for Dana’s hand. She knew she had to overcome her awe and say something. The first thing that popped into her head came out of her mouth. “I’m Lizbeth. I’m a… the new friend.”

Dana smiled and let out a little laugh. Both of their heads turned when they heard the boat engine go back into gear. Gray looked at the dock just once more, before plopping down on the console seat, whipping the wheel to the left, and driving the boat away from the end of the dock as fast as she could, pushing the No Wake rules to the limit.

#

“She never was good at confrontation,” Dana said, as she and Lizbeth stood side-by-side, hands on hips, watching Gray make a huge sweeping arc around the harbor.