V is for Virgin (26 page)

“So?” Kyle said. “If you really loved him, we wouldn’t be here right now. It wouldn’t feel like this.”

I sucked in a breath, fighting against the pounding in my chest, and managed to sit back. “You want me to cheat?”

Kyle sat back a little too, but his eyes never left mine. “I want you to be honest with yourself,” he said. “You and I have something, and you know it.” He took my hand and threaded his fingers through mine. “I want you, Val.” He brushed his other hand over my necklace and said, “More than just this. I want a relationship. Dump the tool and go out with me.”

“Kyle—”

“We could be epic.”

We really could. I was willing to admit that much. Or, more likely, we could be an epic failure.

I opened the car door.

“Promise me you’ll at least think about it,” Kyle said as I stepped one foot out of the car.

I knew I wouldn’t be able to think about anything else, but I was still surprised when I nodded in earnest and whispered, “I’ll think about it.”

Kyle smiled and kissed my hand. “See you tomorrow after the concert. I’ll cross my fingers that you decide to show up
as
my date instead of
with
a date.”

I rolled my eyes as I pulled my hand from his and shut the car door between us, but I hardly felt confident.

I didn’t go to school the next day. I faked a migraine. Or, maybe I didn’t fake it. After being sold out to the tabloids by Zach, my breakup with Cara, and the almost-kiss with Kyle, my heart hurt so bad that I could have had a headache too and I just couldn’t tell. Either way, my sick day felt justified. My parents didn’t even question me.

I stayed in my room with the shades down all day except for the two hours in which I soaked in a nice hot bubble bath. I tried to keep busy. I had plenty of make-up school work to do since I’d missed half my classes the day before, but no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t help logging on to the Internet.

There was a poll that had gone viral on Facebook. Sixty-four percent of the voters believed I was telling the truth, thirty-two percent believed I was a liar, and four percent thought that poll was the stupidest thing ever to be posted on Facebook. There were over three hundred thousand voters so far. I became one of them. I voted for option three.

Then, because I apparently like to torture myself, I logged on to VIsForVirgin.com. The forum was currently gone, replaced with a note from Robin. It read:

VIsForVirgin.com is meant to be a supportive, judgment-free environment. It’s here to help people, not hurt them. Due to the amount of inappropriate, profane and hurtful responses to the outlandish accusations made in yesterday’s tabloids, the chat forums have been disabled until further notice. We apologize to all of our current members and hope to be able to fix the problem soon.

Then she’d linked to my lawyer’s website where my official statement was posted along with the news that a lawsuit was being filed against both the tabloid that printed the story and the “person” who’d sold the false information.

I stared at the site, dumbfounded, until my mom braved entering my room. “You’re not paying attention to those people, are you?” she asked, worried.

I sighed, turned off my computer, and then sat down on my bed. My mom quickly joined me.

“Apparently it was so bad that Robin didn’t want me to see it. She’s disabled the forums and I’m sure she went to school hours early today to go on a deleting spree.”

My mom forced a smile. “She’s a good friend.” After a long weary sigh of her own, she pulled me against her for a tight hug. “I know I should tell you to ignore it and not let it hurt you, but when I can’t seem to follow that advice myself, I don’t see how I can give it.”

That started me off again, which brought on my mother’s tears. We sat there and cried together until I had it all worked out of my system. “Am I doing the right thing with all of this, Mom?” I asked when I was ready to face the situation.

“Oh, Val,” my mom said. “You’re doing a
wonderful
thing, but I don’t know if there’s really a right or a wrong here.”

“Everyone is so mad at me. I never have time for my friends, Cara hates me now, and
Zach
—” My voice broke. “Mom, I don’t want to quit, but sometimes I don’t even know why I’m doing this anymore.”

“You’re doing it for people like me.”

My mom and I both jumped at the intrusion. “Your dad let me in,” Olivia explained, barging into my room without waiting for an invitation. “I think you exaggerated my reputation a bit that day in the cafeteria,” she said. “But I understand why you were upset. I knew hooking up with Zach would hurt you I just didn’t care because it felt good to be the one he dumped you for.”

I wasn’t sure how to respond to that. I think it was as close to an apology I’d ever get from Olivia, but even that much was unprecedented. I couldn’t believe she was being real about something for once.

Olivia wasn’t the awful person I thought she was. I’d judged her a little harshly. We’d spent more time together since she became the prom committee chair, and I’d seen that beneath the evil exterior there was a decent human being inside her. She was just buried really, really deep beneath the surface.

Olivia tugged at the abstinence bracelet she’d been wearing around her wrist for the last few weeks. “I did stuff with guys I didn’t love because it made me feel beautiful, and special. I thought I needed that in order to be worth something,” she said, with an awkward shrug. She smoothed out her skirt. “I was wrong, though. I don’t need guys telling me I’m beautiful to know that I am anymore. I
am
special. I have a great fashion sense and a talent for making things beautiful. It’s like with the prom committee; I’m doing a good job with it.”

“You are,” I agreed honestly.

“We’re going to have the most amazing prom ever, and I’m a part of that. And I’m having fun with it. You showed me that, Val. You and your crazy V is for Virgin campaign, and your constant rejections of Kyle Hamilton showed me that being physical with someone isn’t the only way to make me feel good about myself. I owe you for that.”

I was downright shocked.

“Which is why,” Olivia continued, ending the rare glimpse of her softer side, “even though your best friend is completely self-obsessed, I’m not going to let you ruin your relationship with her.”

“You what?” I asked. The conversation had changed so abruptly I’d failed to keep up.

Olivia rolled her eyes. “I’m here to take you to the concert tonight. I’m going to make you look fabulous, and then I’m going to make you face all those idiots out there who are celebrating your downfall.”

I was spared having to answer because Isaac knocked on my open door. “Hey.”

“Hey,” I said reaching out my hand to Isaac. He sat down on the bed next to me and I smiled for the first time since Kyle dropped me off the day before. “What are you doing here?”

“We were worried about you,” he said then looked to the door where Stephanie and Robin had followed him in to join the unplanned party. “Zach found me at school today. He told me about the picture.”

I was surprised Zach had bothered. “He talked to you?”

“He didn’t do it,” Isaac explained. “He broke up with his girlfriend last week and I guess she was really mad about it. She stole the picture from him. He wanted to apologize but you weren’t at school so he found me.”

“Oh.” I didn’t know what else to say, but understanding what happened made me feel a little better.

“You know I never thought you guys hooked up, right?” Isaac asked, looking really upset. “I knew it was some kind of misunderstanding. I knew you wouldn’t cheat on me any more than I believed you guys did what the papers claimed.”

“Thanks.” Though I suddenly felt guilty for all the time I spent with Kyle yesterday when I hadn’t even called Isaac.

“I’m sorry I didn’t call you,” I said, forcing Kyle from my thoughts. “I was just…”

“Hiding?” Olivia asked bluntly.

Robin gave her a dirty look but I nodded. “Hiding,” I agreed.

“Well it’s time to stop,” Stephanie said forcing a bright smile on her face. “We’ve come to take you to the concert.”

My stomach lurched. Going to the concert was the last thing I wanted to do. Not only would it be like the lecture yesterday times a million, but Kyle would be there and I wasn’t ready to face him.

I could have said no to Olivia, but blow off Steph and Robin? I was relieved to hear Isaac’s sigh. “Steph,” he said warily.

“No, Isaac. She needs to go,” Stephanie turned to me with a rueful smile. “We know how much Cara means to you. You’ll hate yourself if you let one concert ruin your friendship.”

“And you won’t be alone, okay?” Robin added quickly. “We’ll be with you the whole time, no matter what happens.”

“All of us,” Stephanie agreed. “Lacy, Dev, Mason and Jeff are all downstairs waiting for us.”

Robin nodded. “You can do this, Val.”

I looked at Isaac. He seemed reluctant but shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t think it’s a good idea, Val. You know how Kyle is. He can’t resist a spectacle. If you show up tonight he’s only going to make things worse for you.”

I knew Isaac was right. Even though Kyle had helped me out yesterday there was no way he’d be able to resist the ultimate Kyle Hamilton/Virgin Val showdown at his first “S is for Sex” concert in front of thousands of his fans.

“But Cara promised he wouldn’t do anything if she came,” Robin said.

“I’ve heard Cara promise that before,” Isaac replied. “She can’t control him.”

I agreed with Isaac. I didn’t trust Cara’s promise. But I’d also never seen her so mad before. It was possible she might never forgive me. If I didn’t go tonight, I could lose my best friend. I didn’t know what to do.

“It’s a stupid concert, Val,” Isaac said, frustrated. “It’ll happen whether you’re there or not. Maybe it’s important to Cara, but what about you? Aren’t you important to her? Why are you always the one to give in that friendship? You’re her best friend too. She should want to support you once in a while. She’s being too selfish this time.”

My mom squeezed my hand. “Maybe Isaac’s right, Val. Maybe this time you should just lay low until the whole Zach accusation blows over. The Tralse fans are out of control. Cara loves you. She’ll understand.”

I wasn’t so sure about that, but Isaac was right. Cara should have been a little more supportive this time. “She
is
being really selfish,” I admitted.

Olivia interrupted with a loud groan. “Cara is
always
selfish! This isn’t about her.”

“Of course it is,” I said, not understanding what she meant.

“No it’s not. This is about
you
. You’re
Virgin Val
! You need to act like it. Stop hiding. It’s pathetic. Go to that concert. Show the world that that story didn’t break you, and that you aren’t afraid of what people think about you. If you don’t, you’re going to let a whole lot of people down.”

“She’s not a machine, Olivia,” Isaac snapped.

Olivia shrugged unsympathetic. “She made herself a role model. Her actions have consequences now.”

Olivia was right, and her no-nonsense attitude was exactly what I needed. It was just like Cara’s. Everyone always thinks I’m so strong, but I’m not. I’ve always leaned on Cara’s strength, and now that she wasn’t there, I was going to lean on Olivia’s.

Isaac saw the determination creep into my eyes and sighed. “I’m sorry,” I told him. “Please don’t be mad.”

“I’m not mad. I’m concerned. Somebody has to look out for you.”

I managed another genuine smile. “And I love that you do. But Olivia’s right. I need to go.”

Isaac gave up. “All right,” he said helplessly.

“Will you come with me this time? I’d really rather not face the world without you.”

Isaac sighed again. He didn’t want to go. He hated the media attention, and as the boyfriend of Virgin Val, he’d had his fair share. I knew all the craziness of my life made him uncomfortable, and I wouldn’t normally have asked him to come, but I wasn’t sure I could do it without him this time. He must have understood that because he agreed to come, and he even tried to look excited about it.