Authors: Riley Jean
We both looked down at my own bare wrist.
“I cut it off,” I stated simply.
She gasped dramatically. I didn’t know why she was pretending like she cared. Just like our friendship, the bracelet had been gone for months. Not even a faint tan line remained. I was fairly certain Gwen had removed hers a long time ago, too.
“Should I also assume you forgot next weekend is my birthday?” she bit out.
I blinked. Yep. She definitely assumed correctly.
“Don’t remember seeing you here for Scar’s birthday,” Ricky butted in.
She pointed an accusing finger at me.
“She’s
the one who left.”
“Guys! Enough!” I held my hand up. It was a pet peeve of mine when people talked about me like I wasn’t right in front of them. Lexi knew I hated attention. She was doing this on purpose.
“Anyway,” Lexi smiled at me. “I was just going to invite you to my party next Saturday. Zack’s throwing me a huge kegger at his place.”
Zack—No doubt her newest flavor of the week.
“There’ll be two hundred people there and a live band! You still like live music, right Scarlett?”
My face scrunched. I hated going to keggers and she knew it. Even live music wasn’t enough to make up for the drunken crowd, the drive to the beach, and most of all, returning to the place I spent the worst time of my life.
“It’s the least you can do after you ditched me last year. Besides,” she continued without giving me a chance to rebuff, “I have something of yours. Something you’ll want.”
“Oh? And what’s that?” I said. It had been eight months since I left that dorm. If I hadn’t already noticed anything missing, she was free to throw it away for all I cared.
“It was in a large sealed envelope,” her eyes twinkled. “But it felt sort of like… a notebook.”
What was she… ah shit. SHIT. I hadn’t realized… My large eyes met Ricky’s, and I could tell he read my mind.
“Seemed pretty interesting,” Lexi smiled wickedly, glad to finally have my attention. “Especially because it came from—”
“Fine!” I cut her off. “Fine. I’ll come to your party.”
Ricky spoke. “Hell no. Forward the damn package. Mail it here.”
“Sorry,” Lexi shrugged. “I don’t have any stamps.”
“I’ll come to your party,” I said again, ignoring Ricky’s glare. “Bring the package and
do not
open it.”
“Great!” she clasped her hands together victoriously. She had won, and she never wasted an opportunity to gloat. “I’ll email you the deets. Bring a friend or two. See you then!” She blew a kiss to each male, then finally turned around and left.
I had forgotten how frustrating it was to deal with Lexi. I reverted to the old doormat Scarlett, caving to her demands within five minutes and one heartless bribe.
“What were you thinking?” Ricky bellowed—a crack in his unaffected armor. I was getting to see all sides of his personality in one night. “You don’t have to go anywhere for her.”
“What if it was your sketchbook?” I said quietly, hoping he would understand.
“Let her hold it hostage and see what happens. Fuck if I let her manipulate me like that.”
I lowered my voice. “You know what’s in there… I don’t trust her with it.”
He let out a frustrated sigh, reflecting my thoughts exactly. He couldn’t even look at me. “Do what you want. Don’t even think about asking me to come this time,” he said, and stalked off.
I hated that he was mad. What’s more, I hated that he was right. If tonight had been a test to see if I had overcome my past and was able to stand up for myself, I just failed miserably.
“Your friend’s a bitch,” Evelyn snickered.
It takes one to know one
, I wanted to say, but held my tongue until the urge passed.
“That’s enough,” Vance pushed her away with a firm voice. “Let go, Evelyn.”
“But
baaaabe!”
she whined. Goodness, this girl was shameless, and her griping was like fingernails on a chalkboard.
Vance appeared in front of me and his hands slid around my waist. “You alright, Rosie?” he asked, his thumbs making soft circles on my hips. Nervous energy spread through my entire system at the contact, but I was too stunned from the whiplash of the last five minutes to push him away. Instead I looked down at his hands and froze. He should have known that this was off limits. It was a strange sensation—the gentleness of his fingertips, the concern in his voice. It felt too… I don’t know… Different.
But for just a moment, it distracted me from the whole mess of this evening: the crew’s snub, Lexi’s appearance, Evelyn and her whining. There was only me and Vance… my
friend…
who was standing too incredibly close. I lifted my eyes to his, nonplussed and a little hesitant. Why was he touching me like this?
The moment broke as Evelyn spotted his hands on me, then glared in my direction. Her words were filled with venom. “Now I think I know where you got that
ridiculous
hair style idea, Vance.”
When I looked at him again, I understood.
“I think it rocks,” I smiled sweetly up at him, running my fingers through the back of his hair.
Evelyn was messing with the wrong person tonight. I was in no mood to deal with her tantrum. I was
fed up
with mean girls and evil exes. In that moment, all I could think about was getting this spoiled, controlling girl to leave him alone. For years, he let her mistreat him, just like I’d let Lexi mistreat me. And after the last five minutes, I couldn’t take any more. I was angry at my own weaknesses, angry that just when I thought I had finally grown up, I let her come along and shove me down again. Well, I knew one thing for sure—we didn’t have to both fail tonight. If I couldn’t stand up for myself, I was going to stand up for Vance.
Driven by new determination, I wrapped my arms around his neck. He played along seamlessly, pressing into the small of my back to pull me closer. I knew Evelyn was watching, and I wanted her to see that he didn’t answer to her anymore. That for once, he was free to do whatever he wanted, and she had no control over him.
He was really getting into the charade, trailing his hands up and down my hips with long, slow strokes, smoothing over me like I was made of glass.
“Vance Holloway!” his ex hissed, her voice taut with anger.
Ha!
I smiled nefariously at Vance, enjoying our little game. He was a good actor and pretended not to even notice the girl fuming beside us. The way he ignored her—looking into my eyes as if I were the only thing he saw—would tick her off for sure. I wasn’t able to match his focus but met his reverent expression with a devious, dimpled grin. I didn’t even care that he was touching every inch of my back and arms and shoulders with little caresses. All I cared about was winning this standoff.
Oh, he was good at this alright, and having just as much fun as me. Clearly we were making Evelyn angry, but we weren’t finished yet. Oh, no. I’d been pushed over the edge tonight and now it was her turn. In order to make her disappear from his life forever, we would have to raise the stakes. That’s when I knew my next move—I would kiss this boy, right now, right in front of her. I bet she’d love that.
Before I had a chance to lean in more than an inch, she stepped forward in a huff and tugged on his sleeve. When he didn’t budge, she lifted her bulging purse over his head! Was this girl for real? I barely had a second to react. Just as the bag was about to hit its oblivious target, I blocked her and slapped the offending sack away, meeting her glare with one of my own. Hers was sharper and much more effective than mine, but I wasn’t backing down.
Just then, Cole appeared and grabbed Evelyn’s arm to stop her from swinging her purse again. She continued to grumble curses at us and flail like a feral cat. Once Vance woke up and saw the spectacle she was making, he let go of me and took hold of her other arm. Together the two boys dragged her away like a couple of security guards.
Good riddance
, I thought, feeling accomplished.
As I watched them disappear into the crowd, probably looking for some friends to unload her on, the smug smile slowly evaporated from my face. The scene that made me feel so proud a minute ago suddenly only made me feel ashamed.
I didn’t like his ex, and after everything I’d observed about their relationship, the girl did not deserve sympathy.
But on the other hand, she was just a girl who had been dumped by her boyfriend of four years, only to find him in the arms of another girl within a week. And here I was, rubbing it in her face. She didn’t deserve that either. Just because I wasn’t a fan, didn’t mean she was
all
bad. After all, Vance had dated her. Vance—the golden boy. The perfect boyfriend.
Evelyn had held his heart for four years, and therefore she held the trump card. For all I knew, he was off apologizing to her right this second. Maybe even kissing and making up. If that was the case, my time as his friend had already expired.
Served me right for trying to
kiss
him to prove a point. Here was my opportunity to prove that the new Scar didn’t solve problems by kissing boys or causing drama. Another test failed tonight. Thank goodness we were interrupted before I made an absolute mess out of everything.
Things came back into focus when I noticed Summer and Kiki staring at me curiously.
“Did you do that on purpose?” Kiki asked.
I shrugged. “She pissed me off.”
The girls exchanged a glance. Kiki whispered something in Summer’s ear and her expression finally softened. An approving smile touched her lips when she said, “You and everyone else.”
Funny how Summer’s words of acceptance had the exact opposite effect. It hit me—how immature these kinds of dramatics were. I had been so eager to stand up for Vance, but I resorted to the kind of tactic that Lexi would have used. I was no better than any other manipulative, competitive mean girl I claimed to hate.
Finally, Cole and Vance came walking back to our spot along the fence, deep in conversation. I plastered on a smile in an attempt to conceal my guilty conscience.
“Atta girl, Scar,” Cole grinned when he saw me, impressed. “You were badass! Like a ninja!”
Vance looked at me, concern etched on his face. “I wasn’t paying attention… what happened?”
“You didn’t see Evelyn go nutty bonkers?” Kiki snickered.
“Dude!” added Cole. “Scar just saved your ass from getting douched over the head with a fifty-pound purse!”
“Or were you too busy eye humping to notice?” said Kiki.
Vance stared at me with wide eyes, then reached for me. “You alright?”
“She’s fine.” Ricky reappeared out of nowhere and hooked an arm around my shoulder, pulling me in tight. “Keep your girlfriend on a leash.”
Vance retracted his hand. His mouth flattened. “She’s not my girlfriend.”
“It was my fault. I provoked her,” I tried to reassure Vance. Geez, I was like a tornado when it came to relationships. “I just couldn’t stand the way she was speaking to you. And I was angry about Lexi…” I shook my head, embarrassed. “I’m sorry. That was really stupid.”
Vance’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. He looked so disappointed in me that I had to look away. If he wanted off this crazy train, I couldn’t blame him.
With an arm still wrapped around me, Ricky ushered me towards the field. “Come on, you little troublemaker, you.” He kept himself between me and the others for the rest of the game. It might have been possessive, but as always, it was exactly what I needed.
And there, along the chain linked fence, we watched the Saints take home the Smudgepot trophy for another year.
To celebrate tonight’s Smudgepot win, the crew decided to hold the after party at Vance’s parents’ cabin, which was in the mountains, less than an hour away.
None of us had prepared extra clothes or toiletries to equip us for staying out all night. I wasn’t normally so spontaneous, but I forced myself to just go with it, to get out of my comfort zone and all that. Social invitations of this caliber rarely came my way these days, so I convinced myself not to turn it down.
To my surprise, Ricky agreed to join us, for which I was grateful. I still felt like a bit of an outsider with this group of long-time friends. Having him with me helped.
The ride felt a lot longer than an hour with all the twists and turns up the mountain. I had no idea how Vance found his way because it seemed to me like we were just going around in circles in the middle of nowhere.
Landmarks
, he had said. What landmarks? The hills and the trees all looked the same.
But eventually, by some miracle, we found it.
It was too dark to see much of anything from the outside, except that our only neighbors for miles were pine trees. The inside looked pretty cool. A large stone fireplace served as the focal point of the main room. A pair of antlers hung above it. There was plenty of open floor space, covered with a shaggy rug and comfy seating. It also had a full-sized kitchen, one bedroom, a bathroom, a Jacuzzi just outside, and apparently a small lake within walking distance.
The girls called dibs on the bedroom, but ran out screaming and barricaded the door when they found a couple spiders in there. I was secretly glad I hadn’t walked in there with them, because I would have reacted the same. I was fearless and all that, but
spiders
were a whole different story.
“Truth or dare!” Kiki blurted excitedly, warming herself by the fireplace.
“Um…” my eyes flicked to Ricky. I hated to be a party pooper, but Ricky was twenty-two years old. I doubted he wanted to play a game designed for junior high slumber parties.
“It’s okay, kiddo. I have just the thing to spice it up.” He pulled a bottle of Jim Beam out of a cabinet.
I shook my head and smiled at him. Of course he had already scoped out the booze. Motorcycle rides, tattoos, gambling and alcohol; he was the coolest pseudo big brother ever.
Kiki and Summer giggled and skipped into the kitchen to help Ricky find the shot glasses. Cole punched the air excitedly and followed as well. Vance looked back at me and shrugged.
“It could be fun?” he said hopefully.
I sighed. “If they suggest spin-the-bottle next, I’m putting my foot down.”
He laughed, and we headed over to the counter where six shots were waiting. Everyone grabbed one and held it up.
Vance lifted his glass and toasted first. “To friendship.”
Summer followed suit. “To love.”
Cole jumped in next. “To Smudgepot.”
Kiki. “To the San Dimas Saints!”
Then me. “To moving forward.”
Ricky was the final one to lift his shot. “To getting fucked up!”
All at once we cheered and clinked our glasses, then tipped them back. I closed my eyes as the potent liquid slid down my throat.
Hot damn,
how I missed that burn. The others were busy sucking down limes while Ricky was pouring himself another shot. I held up my own empty glass for a refill, and he obliged. I matched Ricky for a third shot as well, and he gave an amused chuckle at my tenacity.
“Slow down, will you?” said Vance, suddenly in my ear.
I rolled my eyes, but did not take another. Three was enough for now.
“Vance. Truth or dare?” Summer started us off as soon as we got settled in the living room area, the Jim Beam and our shot glasses at the ready.
He sighed, preparing himself. “Truth.”
“Did Evelyn use sex as a weapon?”
“Summer!” he shouted, disapproval laced in his tone.
“Dang Summer,” even Kiki admonished.
“What?” Summer looked between everyone in the circle. “Like you guys weren’t already thinking it! Might explain why he stayed with her for so long.”
My eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. Wow. I wasn’t keen on Evelyn either, but I wasn’t going to badmouth their relationship like that. Especially in front of Vance.
Vance shook his head, not looking at anyone. “I’ll take the shot,” he mumbled, and reached for the bottle.
Summer giggled. “Does that mean yes?”
“It means, I’m not gonna talk about her like that,” he frowned at her, then tipped the shot back and made a ridiculously scrunched face followed by a cough. I hadn’t been watching him during the first shot, but I was now fairly certain this was his first time drinking.
“Need a chaser?” I offered, tossing him a lime slice.
“Thanks.” He sucked on it greedily until his features became slightly less contorted. “This stuff is strong.”
I struggled to contain my smile. He was a rookie at this and it was oddly refreshing. Obviously, partying and drinking weren’t his normal scene. I remembered what it was like to be the only straight-edged person in a group of wild friends. But he was a big boy. If he didn’t want to drink, he could say no.
“Okay, Cole,” he cleared his throat. “Truth or dare?”
“Dude, you already know everything, but whatever. Truth.”
“Not everything,” Vance grinned mischievously. “Why did you get written up last year at Mooshi?”
“Aw, come on!”
Vance showed no mercy. “Answer the question or bottoms up.”
“Okay okay! Sheesh… I got caught eating the Butterfinger bars! Satisfied?”
Everyone in the circle laughed heartily at that. Even Cole joined in and laughed at himself.
“You’re so full of it, Elliott!”
“I swear! I swear!”
I decided that’s what I loved about these kids—even their worst secrets were
so
tame.
The friendships and camaraderie among this group were easy to see, and it reminded me of my old high school clique… the way it used to be, before we grew up.
“You nincompoop!” Kiki jested with a poke to his ribs.
Cole pulled a playful face at her. “Whatever, Kiki. Put your money where your mouth is. Truth or dare?”
She bit her lip and gave a cute, lopsided grin, with one eye completely hidden by her orange hair. “Truth!”
“Where’s the craziest place you’ve ever hooked up?”
Her jaw dropped at his question. It might have been the first time I ever saw her caught off guard.
She collected herself swiftly. “Inside a freezer,” she answered. “You?”
“It’s not my turn,” Cole said, unable to control his grin as Summer and Vance started laughing. Clearly it was an inside joke because I didn’t get it.
She rolled those sparkling eyes and turned to Ricky. “Truth or dare, Mr. Storm.”
“Hmm,” Ricky smirked. This whole thing was probably so ridiculous for him. But I appreciated him humoring my friends anyhow. “Truth.”
“Have you ever kissed Scar?”
Eyebrow quirked, he shot a quick glance at me, then back to Kiki. “No.”
“Told you,” I said under my breath. Kiki and Summer giggled uncontrollably but I just rolled my eyes.
Lightweights
. Now maybe they’d believe me and stop with their matchmaker nonsense.
He shook his head at their antics and turned to me. He kicked, tapping his shoe to mine. “Your turn, kiddo. Truth or dare.”
“Dare,” I boldly declared. The girls “oohed” and settled in for the show. I never understood the perception that picking dare was the braver choice. In my opinion, it was actually the truths that took real guts.
“Alright, first dare of the night!” Ricky rubbed his palms together. “I dare you… to dance.”
I blinked. He had gone easy on me. Sure, it was a bit silly to dance by myself while everyone watched. But at the moment there was enough liquid confidence in my system, I didn’t care.
“No problem,” I said getting to my feet. I was a little wobbly and had to use Ricky’s shoulder for balance.
Mmm.
I had a pretty nice buzz going on and dancing actually sounded fun.
Maybe I was a lightweight too.
“One more thing,” Ricky added when I was standing. “I pick the music, and you have to dance to the whole song.”
“That’s two things,” I said, making a show of stretching my legs and rolling my neck. “Bring it on.”
He pressed a few buttons on his phone then held it up. His huge grin that followed was equally joyous and frightening. Techno music started playing, and it made me grab hold of my knees and laugh. And not just a drunken giggle… I’m talking a hearty, ab work-out kind of laugh. I couldn’t believe Ricky remembered this. Recognizing the song too, everyone else joined in, throwing their heads back and cracking up along with me.
Bless Ricky. We were having fun now.
Somehow I was able to break through the fog when the words started. I put on a straight face and lip-synced along to “What Does the Fox Say?” while doing little mimes for each animal named in the song. My friends got a huge kick out of my silly rendition of the viral hit. Peals of laughter and cheers burst through the cabin while I let my hair down and danced.
When it got to the fox part, I busted out the choreography from the music video. I had found it hilarious and watched it twenty times until I had it down. Each time the fox made a new sound, I stood right next to someone and danced the specific moves just for them. Kiki even pinched my butt, so she got a little lap dance action.
Everyone was rolling on the floor from laughter, clutching their sides and wiping the tears from their eyes. I never understood why girls tried so hard to look sexy while they danced. There was such a bigger thrill to be had in making them laugh. Who cared how pretty anybody thought I was, so long as they laughed with me.
The silliness, the buzz, and being surrounded by friends gave me a little high. I couldn’t remember the last time I felt so free. If I didn’t have such a disdain for attention, I might have been born for stardom.
After the song finished, I collapsed in the middle of the circle under a jungle of dark curls. I giggled, unable to see. The floor was hard against my back, but so what? I was swimming in endorphins and wearing a lazy smile. My hair parted from my face like a curtain and I looked up through heavy eyelids to see Vance grinning down at me. I had practically landed in his lap.
“I’m in the mushpot!” I proclaimed.
Upside-down Vance returned my smile and shook his head, eyes dancing with mirth.
“Was I funny?” I asked.
His smile softened and he ran his fingers through my curls, helping to smooth them down. “You were perfect…”
“Your turn, Scar!” Summer shouted.
We were all still giggling and catching our breaths while I chose the next victim. Since everyone had taken a turn, I could pick anyone I wanted.
“Vance! Truth or dare?”
He smiled conspiratorially. “Dare.”
It appeared I had started a trend. I flashed him a wicked smirk.
Let’s see how far the boy with no shame was willing to go…
“Strip down to your chonies and jump in the lake.”
Summer and Kiki squealed with laughter, sputtering over the word
chonies
. Whatever. So what if I used pre-teen language? We were playing truth or dare for goodness sake. Seemed fitting to me.
Vance met my challenging stare with a distinct little gleam in his eye. A devilish grin crept across his face in slow motion. I was totally prepared to pour him another shot when he got to his feet and made his way to the cabin door. In one fluid motion he tugged on his shirt behind his neck and pulled it up and over his head. Without looking back, he tossed it behind him. Of course it landed on my face. I pulled it off, but not before inhaling a warm, spicy scent that was oh so very Vance.
Yum.
The rest of us had kind of a delayed reaction. Then all at once the girls jumped up to follow him.
These woods were Vance’s second home. We did our best to follow, tramping after him in a clumsy tail of giggles and crunched leaves. Would he really do it? Autumn was already in full swing at this altitude. It was cold in the mountains in the middle of the night. The lake had to be freaking freezing!
At last we made our way to a clearing. I could see the moon breaking through the clusters of trees, its reflection rippling in the lake. The three of us huddled together and scanned the shoreline for our friend as our eyes adjusted to the darkness.
“There!” Kiki pointed. And when my eyes found him, everything around me slowed to a halt.
Vance stood by the lake, the smooth skin over his long, toned back glowing faintly in the night, silhouetted by a silver ribbon of one hundred thousand stars. I could write a whole novel on the beauty before me, and still never do it justice. Maybe it was the alcohol or the mountains or something in the air tonight, but seeing him there, clothed only by starlight… he literally took my breath away.