Until Then (Cornerstone Book 2) (14 page)

One of her arms felt colder than the other. It was so cold that it stung, like touching an ice cube or snow, and her eyes flew open. Maggie stood over her holding a pint of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream in one hand and two spoons in the other.

Michelle sat up and rubbed her puffy eyes.

“I saw Sean’s letter on the floor. Are you OK?”

“That was no letter,” Michelle declared. “That was a brush off.”

Maggie climbed onto the bed and sat cross-legged facing her. “I’ve got the remedy.” She handed Michelle one of the spoons, and they dug into the Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough.

“I just don’t get it.” Michelle spoke with the spoon in her mouth. “I thought things were so good between us. I thought this was going somewhere.”

“Guys suck!” Maggie exclaimed.

“They really do.” Michelle took another very large scoop of ice cream and gobbled it down, then looked at Maggie. “Maybe he met someone.”

“Don’t think like that.”

“I can’t help it. It’s the only thing that makes any sense.”

Maggie held out the pint of ice cream again.

Michelle laughed a little and took another scoop. “This was a good idea.”

Maggie nodded as she devoured her own scoop.

“Should I write him back?”

“I don’t know.”

“Because there are a lot of things I’d like to say to him right about now.”

“Maybe you should take a day or two and think about it.”

“What I really wanna do is grab that phone and call him.” Michelle nodded her head in the direction of the telephone. “I want answers.”

“You should. You deserve to know what’s going on.”

“I do deserve that. I’m gonna do it.” She climbed off the bed and lifted the phone to her ear, dialing Sean’s number while taking deep breaths in and out.

It rang several times before an answering machine picked up.

She dropped the phone onto the base, and plopped down in the desk chair. “Machine.”

“I’m sorry, Chelle.”

“I wish I could talk to him face to face. I just wanna know what happened.”

On a bright, shiny May afternoon, Michelle walked along the sidewalk next to Simon. The breeze blew warm against her face, and the birds chirped as they darted between tree branches. Summer was on its way, yet her mood remained as somber as a midwinter’s day.

“You’re not
you
lately, Chelle,” Simon told her. “Where’s that smile I love so much?”

She gave him a weak smile.

“That was pitiful.” He put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her into him. “Smile! It’s a beautiful day. And you’re with me.”

She did smile at that.

“There’s my girl.” He kissed her on the top of the head and kept his arm around her as they walked, leading them in the direction of the mail room.

Michelle’s love affair with the mailbox was a thing of the past. There had been no more letters from Sean, and she never wrote him back. If he wasn’t man enough to be honest with her and admit it was over, then he wasn’t worth it after all. It broke her heart, but she was trying to move past it.

She walked to her box and opened it. Empty.
Of course.

Simon had three pieces of mail. A large, cream-colored envelope with an Evanston, Illinois return address caught her eye.

“What’s that?” She pointed at it.

He slid his finger under the seal and opened the flap, removing a thick card with fancy calligraphy from within. He read aloud, “The pleasure of your company is requested at the wedding of Lindsay Marie Bishop and Sean Aaron Davis on the fourteenth of June …” His voice trailed off. “What the?”

Michelle thought she was having an out-of-body experience. Did he just read that right? Sean was getting married? Her body sank to the floor as her heart sank to the depths of despair. This girl, Lindsay, was obviously the reason he had stopped writing. Tears sprung to her eyes, and she was visibly trembling.

Simon dropped to the floor next to her and wrapped her up in his arms. “I’m so sorry, Chelle. I know how much you cared about him.”

She pushed against his chest and scrambled to her feet, brushing the tears from her cheeks. “I’m fine. I’ve known it was over for a while now. It’s no big deal.” Her instinct was to push the pain aside as she always had when her dad left her. “I’ll talk to you later.” Her feet carried her quickly from the building. Simon called out her name, but she ignored him and made a beeline for the gym. She grabbed a basketball and proceeded to sink it over and over through the hoop, hoping it would help take her mind off the pain and heartbreak. It didn’t. The more shots she took, the more it reminded her of Sean and his scholarship and all that had happened between them.

“This really sucks, God,” she mumbled to herself. “Thanks a lot.”

8

While this day was filled with plenty of pomp, Michelle found herself unhappy with the circumstances. She had worked hard for four years to get to graduation, and here she stood with degree in hand, yet uncertainty clouded her future. She was supposed to have a plan by the time she earned her degree. Things were supposed to fall into place now. So why did she feel no closer to any real direction than when she first arrived on campus?

She truly believed God had led her to Cornerstone, but there had been many times when she felt completely lost. Everyone around her seemed to know exactly where they were headed, but Michelle bounced back and forth between majors. By the end of freshman year, she settled on psychology, but before junior year, her major had changed to business, then back again. Her grandparents became concerned that she was taking unnecessary classes and urged her to pick one thing.

“Just get any degree,” they had said. “You can always do something different than your chosen major, but having a degree will help you get a job.”

In the end, she settled on psychology, but she had no idea what to do with it.

She knew God had a plan, but it eluded her.

As “Pomp and Circumstance” played, she walked arm in arm down the aisle with Maggie.

“We did it,” Maggie whispered. “I’m so proud of us.”

“Me, too.”

They filtered out into the foyer of Calvary Church with the rest of the graduates to wait for their families. Michelle watched as the last of those in gowns exited, those with last names in the
W’
s.

Simon’s eyes met hers and he raised his degree high in the air as he maneuvered through the crowd to get to her.

“Congratulations!” he cried, as he scooped her up and swung her around.

She laughed.

“Can you believe it? We actually graduated.” He flipped open the cover of his degree and showed her.

“I know. They gave us actual degrees, and now what? We just go out into the world? What were they thinking?”

“I think they’ve made a huge mistake. In your case anyway.” He winked.

“Hey!” She punched him playfully on the arm.

“Congratulations, Maggie.” Simon glanced over at her.

Maggie smirked. “Thanks. You, too.” Her eyes scanned the room, no doubt looking for her family and … “Ben!” she exclaimed.

Ben pushed through the crowds to get to her, wrapped his arms around her waist, and kissed her firmly on the lips. “Congratulations, honey.”

Maggie beamed with happiness.

Michelle felt like gagging.

Simon looked annoyed. He hugged Michelle again. “I’m gonna go find my family, OK?”

“OK.”

“I’ll catch up with you in a bit.”

Michelle watched him walk away, then turned back to Maggie and Ben.

Watching them over the past eight months had been difficult. In the fall, Ben began to call almost every day and started showing up at their apartment often. Maggie would return home from seeing him with this blissful, dreamy look on her face. By Christmas, they were officially a couple.

It was difficult not to be jealous, not to want what Maggie had — a happy family life, a budding photography career, and happily ever after with the guy she had always loved.

Michelle wondered if she would ever have any of it.

Her family life had only become more complicated over the past couple years when, out of the blue, her father called to inform her that he had remarried and his new wife was pregnant. She suddenly had a step-mother and a baby sister on the way. That baby sister, Ava, was now a year old, and they had still never met. Michelle wasn’t sure why her dad had bothered to tell her since he made no effort to include her in his new life.

The news of Dad’s marriage seemed to trigger something in her mother. Louise had never dated after the divorce, which always made Michelle wonder if her mom hoped for a reconciliation someday. But when Robert married, it seemed to give her the nudge she needed to get back out there. She started dating a man from work, Marvin, who had been interested in her over the years.

It was strange having parents who were dating and having babies.
Shouldn’t that be me?

Louise joined her daughter in the church foyer. “Congratulations.”

Marvin followed close behind. “Good job, Michelle.” He was a nice man — kind of loud and a little rough around the edges, but he made her mom happy.

“Thanks, Marv.” Michelle looked over at her mother, who looked as if she might cry. “Mom, what is it?”

Louise shook her head and dismissed her with a wave.

Michelle stepped closer and gave her a hug.

Her mother spoke quietly in her ear. “I’m so proud of you.”

Michelle couldn’t remember her mother ever saying those words to her. They tugged at a place deep inside her heart, a place that longed for the special mother-daughter relationship she had seen between Maggie and her mom.

“Thank you, Mom. I love you.”

Louise let go of her then and straightened, smoothing her shirt over her dress pants, as if the time for serious emotion had passed. “Love you, too.”

The distance expanded between them again.

Maggie’s family gathered around, and they exchanged introductions and pleasantries.

Louise had never been very good at getting to know new people, so it was no surprise to Michelle when she and Marv left soon after.

At least they came. Dad certainly couldn’t bother himself to show up.

“You girls have worked so hard for this.” Maggie’s mother hugged Michelle. “I’m very proud of you both.”

“Thank you, Mrs. James,” Michelle said.

“Oh, sweetie, you know after all these years you can call me Patty.”

“I know.”

Ron scooped his daughter up in his arms. “I love you, Magpie.”

“Daddy.” Maggie closed her eyes as she held onto her father.

“I’m proud of you, baby girl.”

Michelle’s heart ached. No matter how much she despised her father, something inside still wanted the kind of connection Maggie and her dad shared.

“Congratulations, Michelle.” Ron took his turn hugging her next, and she fought hard to keep from breaking down.

“Thank you,” she managed.

He let go and turned his attention back to his family.

A tear slid down Michelle’s cheek before she could catch it.

“Hey, you,” a familiar voice called from behind.

She turned to see the friendly face of Janice, her former R.D.