Unplugged (11 page)

“
Lucky snowflakes,” he says.

“
Why?”

“
They get to kiss your skin.” He looks at my mouth. “Your lips.”

I hitch a breath. Liam should step back and let me go, not rewind my thumping hearted self to summer five years ago. Does he remember the last time we were at the pub together, when I was drinking illegally and thought I was so grown up? I threw myself at Liam that night and would
’ve had sex with him if he’d offered. Liam was drunk too and we shared a kiss but no more. The next day he was gone.

Two months later
, I was pregnant by Craig and had to grow up fast.

Reinforcing his point, more snowflakes settle onto my cheeks and
Liam touches my lips. “You deserve to be covered in a snowstorm of kisses by a man who sees the strength and beauty in you.” The intense emerald eyes drag me further into the moment. “There’s a man who craves the love held in your eyes when you look at your daughter, who wants to pull you into the blizzard and show you how to love yourself by being passionate about everything you are.”

The strange poetry of his words wrap around my heart, melting with the snow on my heating skin. If the only thing hovering in the space between us was the sexual spark, I
’d pull a face at his smooth talking, but the Liam I’ve learnt about over the last few days isn’t smooth talking.

“
You’re a sweet guy,” I say.

Liam pulls a pained
face. “Do you know how insulting that is? Lollipops are sweet, kittens are sweet...”

“
No, I think you’ll find kittens are cute.” 

“
Badass rock stars aren’t sweet!” he continues.

“
No, but you’re not a badass rock star, are you?”

“
Jeez, you dent my ego more every minute!” His eyes sparkle with amusement and I’m disarmed. He grabs me around the waist and pulls me close, my hips against his and Liam’s mouth against my hair. “What do I need to do to show you I
am
a badass rock star?”

I pull my head back and look into his eyes, aware of the sensation of the point our bodies connect and nothing more. He moistens his lips.
“I’m not sweet, though, Cerys; the thoughts I have about you are far from sweet.”

I place my hands on his chest, against the leather and wish I could run them beneath and feel the muscles I know are hidden there.
“I wouldn’t want you to have sweet thoughts about me.”

Liam
’s hands roam around to my backside and he tugs me closer, against his lean body. “Believe me, they’re not.”

Our faces touch, his rough cheek against my forehead
, and I know if I move my head a few centimetres, our mouths will meet and our worlds will shift.

“
Is kissing you still wrong?” I ask.

Liam
moves his face. The static charge of our mouths so close and the snow drifting onto our bodies drag us into a surreal world. The shift happens. I slide my cheek along his, the stubble scratching my skin as my lips meet the edge of Liam’s.

The world is covered in
white, hidden from reality; a reality that I hate currently. I can escape for an evening, maybe a few days, and allow his blizzard to overwhelm me. If life is the same struggle when everything melts away again, a few moments lost in a fantasy after months of feeling worthless are what I need and worth the consequences.

Liam digs his hand into my hair and
crashes his mouth against mine. I gasp in surprise at the force as he delves his tongue into my mouth, sliding it against mine. When Liam kissed me in the bedroom the other day, there was a tension in him where he held back part of himself. Was this because Liam knew I held back too? This time the world falls away completely as we kiss frantically, noses bumping as he pulls me into the snowstorm that is Liam Oliver.

Liam moves to kiss my cheeks,
his rough face scrapes against my skin as his hot lips burn into my cool neck. He slides a hand around my waist, beneath my coat and holds me against him; the unexpected feel of his hardened length against my hip shoots hot arousal through me. God, I want this man to touch me.

Convinced my legs are going to give way and cursing the lack of walls for Liam to press me against, I grip his sleeve. Liam nudges his nose back across my face, hot breath mingling with mine and misting in the air.
“Definitely feels right,” he whispers.

Then
Liam kisses me so gently that he takes my soul and pulls it apart. My head spins as the intensity of the slow kiss fills me with a craving for this man that will never be satiated. This is more than feeling right, this is our hearts open and raw finding their way together.

Which means when they
’re torn apart again the pain will kill me.

The heat we create counteracts the falling te
mperature around us but the cold of reality isn’t far. I pull my face away; I need to pull myself out of this.

“
We should go back to your parents’ house,” I say, the dizzying high warming me against the cold.

Liam
’s disappointment at losing my mouth on his is as clear in his darkened green eyes as his desire. “I’m a super smooth guy taking a girl back to my parents.”

“
Not your usual seduction technique, I guess.”

Liam slips his hand into mine.
“I don’t need to get you into my bed; you already sleep there.”

The words touch on what definitely won
’t happen when we get back to the house and I’m relieved we won’t face the opportunity to step too far over the line. If sex underlies Liam’s motives, he’s facing disappointment.

The walk home from the pub is short. As we approach the house, Liam wraps an arm around my shoulder and hugs me close, fiercely kissing the top of my head
, but saying nothing. The cold overwhelms my stiffening hands and feet, the warmth of the kitchen is a relief. Only Goldie greets us, the house dark and quiet. I busy myself making a hot drink, the alcohol and excitement coursing through. Liam rests against the kitchen counter with his hands in his pockets, watching everything I do.

“
Coffee?” I ask, holding up the jar of instant.

“
Put that down and come here,” he says in a low voice.

Liam shuffles down and stretches his legs out so he
’s closer to my height. I approach, heart rate skyrocketing as Liam pulls me toward him, the way he did in the snow. This time his jacket is unbuttoned, I place my hands on his chest, and Liam’s heart beats against my palm at a speed to match mine. Weirdly, I know what he looks like under his shirt because I used to have pictures of a naked chested Liam on my wall.

“
I want to kiss you again,” he says, “but each time I do, it’s harder to let you go again.”

“
I’ll make sure you let me go.” I grip his fingers in mine.

“
I don’t mean tonight. I mean the more I’m with you; the harder it will be to let you go. I don’t want to leave and hurt you more.”

“
Liam, I’m aware what this is.”

“
What?”

“
We’re both already hurt; this soothes the pain, but it’s temporary, I understand.”

He strokes across my cheek and places his fingers on my lips.
“Maybe I’m overthinking this.”

“
Yes, you probably are. But don’t stop in case you hurt me, someone beat you to that, and nothing you could do would come close.”

Liam
’s eyes soften and he hugs me to his chest, squashing the air from my lungs. “Cerys...”

I wriggle from his grasp.
“Don’t feel sorry for me.”

With both hands, Liam holds my cheeks.
“I don’t feel sorry for you; I’m in awe of you, of the fact you’re not a complete mess, that you’re so strong for Ella.”

I swallow back a lump
against the fact he doesn’t know what I keep buried. “You only see the edge of me. Please, Liam, don’t talk about this. Kiss me again.” For a moment, I don’t think he will, that Liam meant what he said. I move my mouth close to his. “Please.”

Liam groans and closes his mouth on mine, fingers disappearing under my shirt. When he touches my skin, he inhales sharply and shifts against me. My nipples harden as I push myself against his chest, heat pooling between my legs as he digs his fingers into my waist and kisses me with a desperate passion I share.

The front door clicks open and we spring apart like teenagers who are about to be caught by parents. Liam bites his lip and smirks at me. “You’re a fucking awesome kisser.”

I lick
the taste of him from my lips unsure whether he’s teasing, and straighten my clothes. Louise talks drunkenly to Goldie in the hallway.

Liam moves closer.
“I’m going to bed,” he whispers, “but I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep.” He kisses my nose before heading out of the door. The kettle boiled minutes ago but I no longer want a drink, or to get a grilling from Louise.

I creep upstairs after Liam and pause outside the door where Ella sleeps. His room is next door. For a minute
, I battle against continuing into Liam’s room. The thought of sleeping in someone’s arms, Liam’s arms, rather than with a four year old who kicks me in the night is a fantasy I can’t visit tonight. I’ve had a lot of things knocked out of me in the last couple of weeks, but self-respect isn’t one of them.

I walk into the room where my daughter sleeps.

CHAPTER
11

LIAM

I do
not
want to be here. A week away from the craziness of my real world isn’t enough, definitely not when I’m dragged into the worst Blue Phoenix scandal we’ve faced. Now I’m in Dylan’s house, with Dylan, Bryn, and Steve, around his kitchen table, unable to believe what the fuck just happened.

Following a restless night filled with images of Cerys in various positions, naked, with me, I crawled out of bed having slept in until early afternoon. My phone rang incessantly for an hour before I gave in and answered
. Blue Phoenix manager, Steve, calling me when I told him I was to be left alone over Christmas pissed me off.

Until he told me why he was calling
, and the world outside of magical Welsh Christmases in the snow gatecrashed my time with Cerys. Jem’s girlfriend, Liv, the heiress six years younger than him with connections to British nobility is dead.

Summoned to discuss how we
’ll deal with the media fall out, I had no choice but to come here.

“
Where is he?” I ask Steve.

“
Jem finally agreed to talk to the police, so he’s still there,” says Steve.

Our manager
’s hair greys more every week, I swear. Today his lined, pale face looks older; and understandably, by Blue Phoenix standards this is an off-the-scale scandal.

Dylan sits with arms tightly crossed over his chest, mouth set in a thin line. I heard him talking to Steve in terse tones about getting dragged into
the circumstances around her death. Dylan spent time at the police station too, guilt by association; but he was with Sky when Liv died. Apparently, Sky is around somewhere too.

“
Tina will be here soon, she needs to release a press statement ASAP. I need firm statements on where you all were last night.” He glances at Dylan. “I know you’ve been through this with the police, so probably not such an issue for you; but Bryn and Liam, we need to know everything you’ve been up to over the last week or so. The press is on our backs and you can guarantee any dirt they can dig will make a nice sideline to Jem’s fuck up.”

“
Jem said he had nothing to do with this,” says Dylan. “I believe him.”

“
Dylan, if this Sky chick is back in the scene, I suggest you hang around here until things die down. Unless you feel like deflecting some attention by announcing your relationship.”

Dylan stiffens.
“What the fuck, Steve? No way. Things with Sky are shaky; I don’t want her running for the hills again!”

Steve huffs.
“Bryn?”

Bryn wrinkles his nose.
“Nothing juicy going on in my life. Not that anyone knows about anyway.”

“
This isn’t funny, Bryn,” snaps Steve.

“
I’m not being funny. I just know how to keep under the radar.”

Steve turns to me.
“Liam. I kept out of this, but what the hell has happened between you and Barbie? We saw the pictures. You’re here; she’s in the US. Is it over?”

I knew
this question was coming. Three pairs of eyes train on me and I rub my hand over my face. “I ended the engagement and went back to Wales to get my head together. I haven’t spoken to her for over a week.”

“
So it is over?” asks Steve brusquely.