Unbroken Pleasures (20 page)

He flipped me
onto my back without pulling out and we lay together that way for a long time
just staring into each other’s eyes. How much further could I fall if I
continued to be lost in him this way?

“You must have
things you need to do,” he said. He planted kisses on my face and I felt his
reluctance to let me slip out of his arms. I didn’t want this moment to end.

“Not really. Do
you?”

“A few things,
yes. I took the liberty of throwing our clothes in your dryer while you were in
the shower. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Not at all,” I
said wondering if our recent romp in bed was merely a way to pass the time
while he waited for his damp clothes to dry.

“I should
probably get dressed.”

I wasn’t ready
to let go of him so easily. “Tell me something about you.”

“What do you
want to know?” He kissed me again.

“Anything. What
do you do for living? Where do you live? What do you like to do in your free
time? I don’t know anything about you, Reese.”

“This is what I
like to do in my free time,” he said playfully stroking my body and running his
hands down my belly and between my legs.

“I’m serious.” I
pushed his hand away. If he kept touching me then inevitably I was going to
want more and then we’d be right back where we started. Not a bad thing
admittedly but first I needed to know something more about the man who had such
a hold over me. He resisted.

“I’m serious
too,” he said.

“What are we
doing?” I pulled away from him to put some distance between us and he finally
relinquished his game.

“I thought we
were enjoying each other’s company.”

“That’s all this
is then? Just a way to pass some free time? I’m a hobby?”

He stared at me
for a long time without saying anything and I wished that I could take back the
words. I knew how needy and desperate I must have sounded.

“I’m sorry, I
didn’t mean that,” I said.

He pulled
himself into a sitting position and turned his back to me to drape his legs
over the other side of the bed. I just sat on my knees, naked and vulnerable
but no longer caring.

“I should go,”
he said quietly.

“I’m sorry.” I
put my hand on his shoulder to stop him from walking away and leaving me like
this. Moments ago we were tangled together and nothing had ever felt more
perfect or right in my life. I didn’t want to let go of that feeling, and I
especially didn’t want to think that I’d just pushed him out of my life just by
the few thoughtless words that I spoke. He put his hand over my hand but he
didn’t turn to look at me and this really bothered me. It was in that moment
that I realized that there was some outside factor that stopped him from being
with me. It wasn’t just that he had to go, he shouldn’t have been here with me
to begin with.

“Am I going to
see you again?” I asked but I wasn’t sure I wanted to know the answer. Whatever
had happened between us had pushed things well out of control for both of us.

“Yes.”

My pulse
doubled. “When?”

I felt his body
tighten as he warred with himself before he could answer and I wondered what it
was that he had to fight so hard against.

“I will return
to you tomorrow night.”

I wrapped both
arms around his shoulders and pressed my chest against his back. I wanted to
tell him how much I wished that I could keep him there with me but I knew it
wouldn’t make any difference to speak the words. He could feel it. He turned in
my arms so that we were face to face and he kissed me, gently at first but then
with more urgency. I wrapped my legs around his waist and pulled him down onto
the bed with me and I kissed him and clung to him with every once of strength
that I could manage. I felt him hard against me and I knew that we would give
in to each other once more before he got dressed and walked out my door but
just as he pressed his weight into me, I heard a knock at my front door. We
both froze still reluctant to let go of the passion that overwhelmed us.

“Do you need to
get that?” he whispered into my ear before replacing his words with his tongue.
I moaned.

“They’ll go
away,” I said thinking of nothing but the feel of him inside me to replace the
aching need that burned there.

The sound of
knocking became more insistent followed by the muffled voice that I knew so
well on the other side. “Alex, I know you’re in there.”

“Shit,” I said,
“It’s Sylvia.”

“I should go.”
He started to pull back but I held him in place with arms and legs.

“No. Please
don’t go.”

He groaned as he
sank into me. I wondered if I would ever get used to that feeling of him and
the amazing pleasure that it brought me when we were locked together. I closed
my eyes and gave in to the feelings as I blocked out all sounds of the world
outside us.

“Oh my god, I’m
so sorry!”

I opened my eyes
and turned my head just in time to see Sylvia backing out the bedroom door
quickly. Reese stopped moving and collapsed against me on the bed smiling
again.

“I think I
really should go,” he said almost laughing.

“You don’t have
to go. Just give me a minute.”

I got up and
wrapped my robe around me knowing that Sylvia would be waiting for me in the
living room. I ran through a list of plausible explanations as I approached her
but I wasn’t prepared for the conversation that we await me.

“What are you
doing, Alex?”

“I thought that
might be a little obvious,” I said feeling my face flush, “Why did you let
yourself in?”

“The door wasn’t
locked and I knew you were here. I just thought you weren’t talking to me after
what happened last night. I never thought in a million years that I would catch
you in bed with a man… with
him
.”

“Relax, Sylvia,
it’s not a big deal.”

“What the hell
happened to Adam? Does he know about this?”

“Adam and I
broke up last night.”

She looked at me
stunned for a moment. I could tell that she was trying to put two and two together
but I’d completely broadsided her with the revelation that she might find me in
bed with anyone other than Adam.

“That dinner
then really was just a big lie to get me together with Ben,” she said.

“No, I really
did want you to meet him. I wasn’t planning on breaking up with him. It’s just
the way things worked out, I swear.”

“You sure didn’t
waste any time, did you?” she accused.

“You’re one to
talk.”

“What’s that supposed
to mean?”

“It’s not like
you pick a guy and stick with him, Sylvia. Don’t play all prudish on me now.”

If looks could
kill, I would be dead.

“You have a lot
of nerve.”

I felt Reese
walk up behind me and put his hand on my arms and my heart sank. He had gotten
dressed and planned to leave. I still needed him.

“Sylvia,” he
said by way of greeting and I could feel the tension in his body as he spoke.

“Reese,” Sylvia
shot back equally as tense. I froze in panic. She didn’t make assumptions about
who I was with, somehow she knew. I felt my heart fall to my stomach and twist
and I wasn’t sure I wanted to know the answer, especially after the reputation
I just accused Sylvia of keeping. Was Reese one of her many cast-offs? Could I
ever feel the same way in his arms again knowing that Sylvia had been there
before me? I tried to find my voice to speak but nothing came out. I felt him
kiss the top of my head lightly.

“Alex, I will be
back tomorrow night,” he said before he walked out the front door. I was powerless
to stop him. I couldn’t even utter a goodbye.

“It was him? All
along it’s been
him
?” Sylvia said to me as soon as the door clicked.

“You know him.”
It was all I could manage to say.

“Yes, you could
say that.”

“Do I want to
know how you two know each other?”

“You told me you
weren’t going to see him again.”

“I don’t see the
harm in a little fun.”

“Is that really
all it is because the look on your face says a whole heck of a lot more.”

“Yeah, it’s
really only a little fun. Is that so terrible?”

“Actually, in
this case it is.”

“Do you mind
telling me why?”

“He’s not your
type, Alex, I guarantee you if you, you’re playing with fire. If you keep
messing around with that man, you are going to get burned.”

“Just because it
didn’t work out with you doesn’t mean that it isn’t going to work out with me,”
I said feeling a little taken back by the strong words. All the years that I’d
known Sylvia, she’d always taken a playful approach to dating and had never
talked badly about a relationship gone sour. The curiosity was killing me. What
did this man do to her? Was she in love with him the way I was certain that I
was in love with him and he ultimately rejected her? The thought made me feel
sick to my stomach.

“That’s not what
I mean.”

“Well then why
be all secretive about it? Why not just tell me what you really mean? If it’s
so important that I stay away from this guy then give me a good reason and it’s
done.”

“Just take my
word for it on this one, Alex.”

I sighed.
Whatever it was, Sylvia seemed determined enough not to tell me.

“What are you
really here for?” I asked her feeling suddenly exhausted. The lack of sleep was
catching up with me quickly now that Reese had walked out the door.

“I was going to
come here to apologize for what happened at the restaurant last night.”

“But?”

“But I’m not
sure you deserve my apology anymore.”

“Sylvia, that’s
hardly fair.”

“You lied to me,
Alex.”

“How?”

“You lied to me
about him. You lied to me and you lied to Adam. You are probably even lying to
yourself.”

“That isn’t
true.”

“Are you going
to tell me what’s really going on here?”

“I don’t think
that’s really any of your business,” I said. She stared at me for a long time
without saying anything, as though she were weighing her options before
choosing what she would say.

“I can’t believe
you broke up with Adam for this,” she said at last and then started heading for
the door. I stood in shocked silence watching her leave. There didn’t seem to
be much point in trying to reason with her. For whatever her reasons, she was
ticked about my decision and I was feeling rather ticked myself that she found
it necessary to keep me in the dark about her reasons why.

I fumed for at
least a half hour after Sylvia left me that morning. I tried to conjure all the
possibilities that made her so anti-Reese. I tried to imagine her dating him,
sleeping with him and quickly steered clear of those images. I didn’t like
imagining Reese with anyone other than me. I’d never felt this way about any
man before, not even Ed. More than anything, I fumed because I wanted Sylvia to
be as happy for me as I felt and I wanted her to encourage my relationship,
however unusual it may be, simply because it was what I wanted. I’d always
supported her even when I didn’t agree with her casual approach to men and
dating. If she couldn’t do the same for me then I was faced with the
possibility that Sylvia was not the friend that I’d always believed her to be.

This fact broke
my heart and left me feeling lost and alone. Was it really worth pursuing
anything with Reese when it meant that my best friend would never speak to me
again? After all, even Reese wasn’t even willing to tell me about himself so
maybe Sylvia was right. Clearly he had something to hide. It would hurt a lot
less if I broke the ties now before I sank any deeper. The only problem was
that I didn’t think I would ever be capable of saying no to Reese.

Chapter 18

I scoured my
dresser until I found the black silk panties and matching bra and garter that I
had purchased for a special occasion. I enjoyed the feeling of the fabric
against my skin and admired myself in the mirror as I waited for him. I felt a
flurry of anticipation in my belly. No matter how many times Reese walked into
my bedroom, it would always feel like the very first time, of this much I was
convinced.

I heard the
latch on my front door. It opened almost soundlessly except for a subtle creak.
My heartbeat increased instantly. I didn’t move from where I stood in front of
my bedroom mirror. I didn’t say a word. I knew that he would find me. I sucked
in my breath as I heard his footsteps down the hallway and I felt more than saw
his large form fill my doorway. I didn’t turn around to look at him. Every cell
of my body felt alive with anticipation as he walked up behind me. Our eyes
locked in the reflection of the mirror and I could tell that he approved of my
choice of attire for this evening. The weather was warmer than usual, hot and
sticky with a humidity that clung to the air but yet I shivered when he took my
shoulders in his strong hands.

“You look
beautiful this evening,” he whispered in my ear and my entire body trembled.

“Thank you,” I
managed to whisper even though my throat was dry.

He lets his
hands slide my arms from my shoulders to my hands and he took both of my hands
in his as we continued to look at each other in the mirror. After a moment, he
used his hands to place mine against my breasts. I was no stranger to touching
myself. I had been doing a lot of it, especially since meeting Reese, but
somehow with his hands guiding my fingers to caress myself, the sensation was
alien to me and highly erotic.

He guided one
hand down across my bare stomach to the outside of my panties but stopped just
above my panty line.

“Do you like to
touch yourself?” he asked me breathless.

“Yes.”

“Do you think of
me when you touch yourself?”