Read Tortured Beginning Online
Authors: V. M. Holk
She would always hid me in the closet, so I didn't have to see what happened. She knew it would be bad, every time he came home drunk. I would curl up in the corner and cover my ears. I would pretend I was somewhere else, and make up that we were a normal, happy family.
I heard my mother scream that night, then silence. I was so afraid to the closet. That was where the police found me. The neighbor had called the police, when she heard my mother scream. My father was passed out on the couch with a whiskey bottle in his hand. Thankfully, Mrs. Johnson told the police about me, or they may have not found me.
That's when I went to live with my grandparents. They were my mother's parents, but they never got over losing their only child. There were times when my grandma would look at me and burst out crying. I think they saw my mother in me, and they didn't know what to do with me.
When I was a teenager, I stayed away as much as possible. I was trying to make things easier on them. My grandma died when I was sixteen, and my grandfather died three months later. Instead of going into the system, I ran.
I got into trouble, living on the streets. Stealing to get money, so I could eat. One day while I was shop lifting, I met Randy. He was in the corner watching me and followed me outside. He grabbed my arm, and I thought I was toast.
He introduced myself, and offered me a job. He owned a tattoo shop, and he taught me everything I know. I thank god, that he saw something in me and saved me.
I look up to see Jaylah standing at the rail of the boardwalk, looking at the small waterfall. Maybe it's the same for us, we need each other to heal. I walk over to her and wrap my arms around her middle. She leans back into me and we stand and admire the view.
After walking around for awhile, we decide to leave and head back to town. There is a nice downtown area, with all kind of shops. If we buy anything, we can always ship it home. Once back on the bike, I feel better. I love my bike, it's such a freeing feeling being on it. I always get depressed in the winter, when I can't ride it.
The short ride, is enough to clear my thoughts. I want us to enjoy our days, without the past hanging over our heads. I park down the street from where we ate breakfast. We strap our helmets to the seats and start walking along, looking at the shops.
As we walk along the street, I can tell that he has snapped out of whatever was bothering him. I gave him his space at the boardwalk, not wanting to intrude on his thoughts. When he wrapped his arms around me, I knew he was better.
I see an antique shop, and pull him into it with me. As soon as we walk in, I look around in awe. I love old things, I fell drawn to them. As I feel the furniture and look at all the history in one place. I always wonder what their stories are, where they have been.
"You look like a kid in a candy store."
"I love this stuff, can you imagine the history in this stuff?"
"I never thought of it like that."
I watch him looking at the liquor section. It has items from, shot glasses, martini mixers and nice drinking glasses. I walk off towards a section in the back. I look around and find a little table, that I fall in love with it. It's not the the most ornate piece, but something about it, I want it.
It's the size of an end table, it was painted white, but has the worn look. It has a small drawer and under that a shelf. I open the drawer and a see a black and white photo. I see this table in a little girls room. No person in the picture, I turn it over and see writing on it. Made for me by daddy.
It brings tears to my eyes. And I know I have to have it. A woman walks up to me, and I look up at her.
"It's a nice piece."
"Yeah. I love it. Do you know the person that use to own it?"
"She died last year. I left the picture with it, I couldn't bare to not have it in there."
I nod, "Can you ship this for me?"
"Of course," she smiles at me.
Nico walk over and looks at the table, "You getting this?"
"Yes. But I want to look around some more."
"I'll put it by the counter for you. Let me know if you need anything."
We walk around some, more and I find a few small things, I want to buy as well. Nico finds a couple of things he wants as well.
We are at the counter, paying for our purchases.
"The shipping will be cheaper if we send it all to one place. Is that okay?" the woman asks.
I look over to Nico, and he nods. "That will be fine, thank you."
I smile to myself, to know that he isn't running away from, or me from him. I think of Trevan, and turn away from Nico. Both men, bring me something that I need. I don't know if I can ever move on, but I need to figure out what I do want. How I ended things with Trevan, he wouldn't want me anymore. I'm surprised all the shit I've Nico through, that he is here with me. I shake myself from my thoughts, and walk back to Nico.
We are walking out, I hear my stomach growl.
"Well, I better feed you."
"Yes, you better." I smile up at him.
"We can walk to the same restaurant, or we can ride around and see what we find. It's up to you."
"Let's walk to the same restaurant. I'm too hungry to wait."
As we are walking, Nico grabs my hand. My first thought was to pull away, but I don't. We walked the short distance, enjoying each others company. We get to the restaurant and Nico opens the door for me.
As soon as we walk in, the smells of food make my stomach growl, again. Nico puts his hand on my lower back and we take a seat in a booth by the window. The waitress follows us over and sets down two menu's for us.
Once the waitress takes our order, I fidget with my silverware. I'm not use to having this anymore. Most of the times Trevan and I went out, was with friends. When we were alone it was at my house or his. I haven't done this since, Ben. I really don't want to start thinking of him.
"Penny for your thoughts."
I look up, "What? It's nothing."
"Come on. You are definitely thinking of something."
I sigh, "I don't know how to act. I haven't done this for a long time." I move my hand between us. He smiles back at me, and chuckles. "What?"
"I haven't done this either, since Elizabeth. We can figure it out together."
I nod. The waitress brings our drinks and soup. We start eating and I feel relaxed, for the first time. Well the first time, in a very long time. We talk about our plans for tomorrow, and it's a nice meal.
I wake up, to see Nico sleeping next to me. I smile, remembering our night. That was a nice change for me, we usually do it fast and hard. This time we got to know each other, feel each other.
I put my fingertip to his forehead, and brush the hair from his eyes. I see a smile creep over his face. I smile back at him, when his eyes slowly open.
"Mmmmm. What a beautiful sight to wake up to."
I laugh at him and start to get out of bed. He grabs me around the waist, back down to him.
"Where are you going?"
"I was going to brush my teeth and make coffee."
He kisses me gently on the lips, "Fine. But only because, I need coffee."
I smack him gently on the arm and get up. Once in the bathroom, I lean on the counter and take a few deep breaths. I look at myself in the mirror, and I don't hate what I see.
I finish up in the bathroom, and make the coffee. I walk out to see Nico sitting on the small patio. I change into warmer clothes, and wait for the coffee to finish.
Once the coffee is done, I make each of us a cup. I open the door and step out, handing one to Nico. He smiles up at me, and I sit on his knee. He wraps his one arm around my waist and I nestle back onto him. We sit drinking our coffee and looking out at the water.
I wish this time could stand still. To be here with him, at this place. It's almost to perfect, and I don't do perfect. I chuckle to myself, and smile.
"What?"
"I was just thinking." I look down at him and smile, "This is too perfect."
He laughs at me, sliding his hand up my back. He grabs me around the neck pulling down to him. We kiss gently on the lips, and I wrap my arm around his neck. I put my fingers in his hair and play with it. I look back out at the water, still playing with his hair.
"I know what you mean, it is too perfect."
"It's not as bad as I thought it would be."
"Yeah. I can see why people do it."
We look into each others eyes and start laughing. It's a full on laughing, it feels good. I haven't laughed like that in awhile.
I stand up and look back at him, "Let's go get some breakfast."
He nods, as he gets up. As we step back into our room, Nico smacks me on the ass. I smile to myself and keep walking. We get grab our things, lock up and leave.
After we eat, we decide to go see the Lighthouse. Later we are going to the local festival. I haven't done so much sightseeing, or just enjoying myself in a long time.
The lighthouse tour wasn't a long one, only a half hour. We walk around the beach, finding a spot to sit. We sit side by side, looking out at the water. This really is a beautiful place to live. I envy the people that get to wake up to this every morning.
"How nice would it be to look at this everyday?" I look over at Nico.
"You aren't kidding, it would be great."
"I'm not looking forward to going back. I wish we could stay."