Throw Away Teen (12 page)

After lunch, I read a few more chapters of
Anne of Green Gables
. Then, I tried to sketch Guard again, but he still wriggled around when he was supposed to be sleeping. Liz suggested taking a photo of him and working from that, but I didn’t have a camera and she was out of film in hers.

Partway through the afternoon, Liz said she was going to take a nap. “I didn’t sleep very well last night,” she said. “I was afraid you might decide to go back to Seattle.”

Her admission surprised me, and I struggled to keep my face impassive.

I was tired, too, but I wasn’t about to go to bed at two-o-clock. “I think I’ll lay in the yard and read some more.”

“I’ll find you a blanket.” Liz headed for the linen closet in the downstairs hall.

I followed her. “I don’t need one.” Kids who were an inconvenience got returned to sender. I knew that. “Don’t bother, Liz. It’s too much trouble.”

“It’s not any trouble, B.J. I want to give you a blanket so you don’t catch cold lying on damp grass, and I will. So, put that in your pipe and smoke it!”

Wow, did that just come out of a sweet, little old lady? I shrugged and said, “Okay, but it’s going to wind up with dog hair on it.” I knew darned well that at least three dogs would be on it with me. After all, only Bull and Fifi slept on the floor in my room.

“Blankets are washable.” Liz handed me a blue one covered with unicorns. “This is too worn out to be used on the beds anymore. Shake it out before you come inside.”

“Okay.” I started for the back door. I stopped at the fridge to grab an apple and picked up my book off the counter. Liz had followed me into the kitchen, so real quick, I said, “Thanks.” I escaped outside before I added anything sappy. I had to remember to not get attached if I wanted to survive. I liked it here, but that didn’t mean I was here for good.

I spent the rest of the afternoon reading. Guard curled up next to me, his head on my side. He’d wake up occasionally to chase butterflies and Samson, but mostly Guard stayed with me. I dozed off while reading about the orphan girl’s adventures.

CHAPTER 7

Ted arrived home shortly after five. After dinner, I did the dishes while he fed the dogs. Since I was in the kitchen, I could call Guard back to eat his food when he got distracted by the pom-a-poops. It was only fair for us to do the chores since Liz had cooked supper. Then, we piled into her Pontiac. All my worldly possessions would fit in the trunk—no problem. Before Ted started the engine, I asked, “Can I bring Guard and show him to the other kids? Otherwise, they won’t believe me when I tell them about the puppy.”

Liz and Ted looked at each other. Finally, Ted said, “Okay, B.J., but you’ll have to keep him on his leash. He doesn’t know what traffic is yet, so you’ll have to be responsible for making sure he stays away from the street. If he wets on the floor—”

“I know already. I’ll have to clean it up.” I jumped out of the car and raced for the house before they could change their minds. Guard still didn’t like wearing his harness and leash much. He jumped and pulled away, then plunked down on his little furry butt and cried. I waited for him to get over his sulking and petted him whenever he came to me. Finally, he opted to follow me, so I walked him around the yard for a few minutes before I took him to the car.

The trip to Seattle was a lot more fun with Liz, Ted and Guard. It didn’t take us that long to get there. The center was on a busy cross street and the traffic sounded really loud compared to Stewart Falls. I wondered how I’d ever managed to sleep there.

I kept Guard close to me when we went inside. Dr. Murphy was the first to spot us. He dismissed the rent-a-cop he’d been talking to and came over to us. Herphy Murphy was a short, fat guy with thinning hair that he combed over to hide his bald spot, which was pointless since most of his scalp showed through anyway. There was always dandruff on the shoulders of his black suit jacket.

He was the director of the group home. He always told Carol to act like a professional instead of a delinquent when she came to see the kids assigned to her caseload. Since he chewed her out and dissed her in front of us, we tended to take her side. It was probably all just an act anyway, to get us to cooperate with our caseworkers, but no one really cared.

Herphy Murphy only nodded at me then immediately sucked up to Liz and Ted, like usual. “Good evening, Mr. Driscoll, Mrs. Driscoll.” He shook hands with Ted and pretended to see Guard for the first time. “And who is this, B.J.?”

“My puppy. Liz and Ted gave him to me. I want to show him to the other kids.”

“Go ahead. They’re down in the rec-room, undoubtedly wreaking havoc.” Herphy Murphy laughed at his own joke. He always thought he was funny, even when nobody else did.

“I’ll just take him there real quick, then get my stuff and be right back,” I told Liz.

“We’ll wait for you.” Ted winked at me. “I wouldn’t leave a dog here.”

That almost made me laugh, but Herphy Murphy scowled. Guard and I weren’t even halfway down the hall when I heard him say, “I can’t believe you gave a girl like B.J. a dog. Studies show teens from her type of environment abuse animals. Statistics...”

I didn’t want to listen anymore. What did he really know about me anyway? I loved Guard-dog and I’d never hurt him. I still felt bad about walking off this morning when I left him on my bed, but I wouldn’t do it again and I’d prove Herphy Murphy wrong.

I bent and scooped Guard up into a hug. The black and white fluff ball wagged all over, licked my face and then woofed. The sharp bark instantly brought kids out of the recreation room. Well, most of them. The stoners stayed by the window, passing their joint around again once they realized it was only me. The other kids just turned a blind eye to their hobby. It was like the beer Irene kept under her bed. They were well aware of the butt-whumping they would get for snitching.

“He’s so cute. What’s his name?” Terry asked, as she petted Guard.

“Guard-dog.” I told her. “He’s mine.”

“Or you’re his,” Terry said. Her black hair was almost the same color as Guard’s. “Can I hold him?”

“Is he going to live here?” One of the little kids demanded. “Can we take him for walks, B.J.?”

“Nope.” Gabe pushed through them. Fury glittered in his dark eyes and his jaw tightened. He looked dangerous in black jeans and a tight black T-shirt. “B.J. has a home now with real parents. I’ll bet it doesn’t last a week.”

“Shove it. Liz and Ted are cool. And I’m only going to hang there a while and see how it goes.”

“’Yeah, right.” Gabe glared down at Guard who just cocked his head and then opened his mouth in what was almost a grin if a dog could smile. Gabe nearly lost it, but he’d mastered how to act tough, so he didn’t. He just ruffled the white collar of fur around Guard’s neck. “Let Terry have him. We need to talk, B.J.”

“Okay.” I gave Terry the leash and passed over the puppy. “You can take turns walking him up and down the hall if Terry says it’s cool. I want to see him all the time. If he makes a mess, you little brats have to clean it up.”

After they’d started parading Guard down the hall, I turned to Gabe. He was the closest thing I had to family. He was mine and I was his, but not in a vulgar way. He was the way I’d always imagined a brother might be.

“It’s different this time, Gabe. It might actually work out. Ted even took the door off the bedroom closet. I have my own bathroom. Nobody’s hit me or even yelled at me yet and it’s been almost four whole days.” I didn’t think my little tiff with Jocelyn was worth mentioning. I knew I could handle her.

Gabe reached in the front pocket of his sweatshirt for a cigarette. He knew I didn’t smoke and that just the smell would make me puke, but offered me one anyway. I shook my head. He stuck it in his mouth, but he didn’t light it. “You and I go back a long way, B.J. You’re still the five-year-old who thinks the right family will come along and love her. It
ain’t
in the cards, babe, not for people like us. Tell them you’re staying here.”

“I can’t, Gabe. Not this time.” I looked down the hall and watched the little kids play with Guard. “I have to take this chance. They deserve that much. They gave me a puppy.”

“The Nazis used to do that when they trained S.S. officers during World War II. Each trainee would get a puppy and when the guy graduated, he had to kill his dog, even though he’d loved and trained it for years, from when it was a puppy.”

“That’s awful.” ’My dinner rose up in my throat and I gagged. “Liz and Ted aren’t like that.”

“Then you’ve been smoking with the druggies if you think so. How many times do I have to tell you to use your brain, not waste it, Bertha Juniper?”

“Don’t call me that! I’m B.J. You should know. You gave me that name.” I wanted to smack Gabe, except he was right. We’d been tight for years. He was the one who’d taken care of me forever, before I was five. He moved into the house with the crazy lady who left me to be locked in the closet. Gabe was the one who let me out and threatened to bust heads if it happened again. “Even if this works out, you’re all I really have,” I said. “You know that, right?”

“I know, babe. It’s why I’m telling you not to do this.”

Remembering all the times he came to my rescue, I put my arms around Gabe’s neck and pressed close. He held me tight. “I know you’re worried about me, but I have a good feeling about this. Ted took me to a karate class. He said he wants me to know how to protect myself. I think he knows how scared I am of men. I know it sounds crazy but I really feel like they understand me.”

“
I want you to call me every week,” Gabe said, holding me tight, muttering into my hair. “You better tell me how things
really
are, not the crap you give Carol.”

I’d memorized Liz and Ted’s phone number before we’d left, so I gave it to him. I knew Gabe would call on a regular basis, so I hoped Liz would be cool with it. Of course, Herphy Murphy said if I kept hanging with Gabe, I’d be pregnant before I turned sixteen. Just like all the other adults I’d met in my life, he didn’t understand me or my relationship with Gabe. I was just another street slut in his mind.

“
I’ve got to get my stuff,” I said.

“
And your dog.” Gabe let go of me. “I wonder if Candy-Coated Carol can find me a place where I can have a pony.” His tone was sarcastic but I knew him well enough to know he meant it. Raised on a ranch in Montana, his mom had dragged him off to Seattle when she divorced his dad. It didn’t take her long to decide Gabe was incorrigible and dump him at a fire station. He was only seven when we met in that foster home.

“
Are you really going to ask her for that?”

“
If she can get you a dog, she can get me a horse,” Gabe said.

I sighed and walked away. Guard had been having a tail-wagging good time with the little kids, but when he saw me he scrambled over immediately. I scooped him up and started for my old room, with Terry and the brats trailing along, Gabe behind all of us. It might feel like a parade, but I knew Guard was making me popular.

The room looked smaller then I remembered, though nothing had changed. Three beds still sat in a row under the windows, with three dressers lined up against one wall and a closet on the opposite wall. The brown tile floor looked cold and drab compared to the plush new carpet in my room. The bathroom we shared with the girls next door wasn’t much, just a toilet, sink, and a shower, while mine was three times bigger.

When had I begun to think of the room at the Driscolls’ as mine?

I stopped partway into the room when I saw Irene. She’d braided her black hair tight to her head and taken out the rings in her ears, nose, and eyebrow. Either she was turning over a new leaf and mending her rebellious ways, like Carol always suggested, or she was preparing.

The glint in Irene’s dark eyes and the smirk on her face told me it was the latter. That and the beer can I saw next to my bed. She walked over and flopped down on my bunk, stretching out like she owned it. She pulled a cigarette from the pack next to my pillow and stuck it in her mouth, but she didn’t light it.

She was bigger than me, but it wasn’t all fat. I’d seen that in our last fight when she jumped in to save me. A lot of Irene was pure muscle. Hispanic, African-American and Chinese, she always played the race card when there was trouble. If anyone crossed her, she would claim they were just prejudiced against her. But it never worked with me, which was why she was my best friend. She knew I’d bust a white chick as fast as I did her.

I might be leaving but I wasn’t gone yet, and already she was claiming my territory, looking for a fight. I almost laughed. She’d landed in the infirmary because of me, so I decided to oblige her. I passed off Guard’s leash to Gabe who’d followed me inside. I was across the room in a heartbeat. I grabbed her unlit cigarette and threw it on the floor. She came up off my bed, swinging at me. I ducked. She was in my space and we both knew I had to defend it. That was one of the rules we lived by.

I slapped her as hard as I could then backhanded her. She whirled toward me. I ducked the next punch and down-blocked the way Sensei taught me. I brought up my fist, hitting her in the mouth. Her lip split open and blood flew. I vaguely heard a little kid yell as Irene tried to grab my throat with her thick hands. I broke away with an elbow jab to her chin.

She spit blood on me. We didn’t speak, scream, or even cuss. We never fought like girls, clawing and scratching. We were street trash. We knew it and we dealt accordingly. She slugged me in the ribs and I reeled back, but she followed me. I kicked her in the knee. When she went down, I clocked her ear.

I heard Guard bark then yelp. That distracted me long enough for Irene to pull me onto the floor. She aimed a punch at my face, but I jerked clear and her fist hit the floor with a solid thump. I kicked her again and we rolled across the room. I tried to wriggle out of her grasp, but she hung on, struggling to get another shot at me.

Suddenly, we were pulled apart. Liz held me while a couple rent-a-cops had Irene.