The Winner's Game (24 page)

Then it happens.

The sharp pain in my chest. Same as yesterday when Cade made that comment about me blowing it with Tanner, only…not the same as yesterday. This is worse. It starts in my chest, then runs down my arm.

There are no friendly butterflies, only the sting of a bee.

I want to scream, but it hurts too bad. All I can do is double over. As I do so, I faintly hear Tanner asking what's wrong.

“Nothing,” I lie. Then everything goes black.

This is just like the swim meet! Oh, please, God, don't let me fall off the dock and drown…

When I first open my eyes, everything is foggy. There is a boat. And another one. The dock. The herd. The sunset.

A spot on the side of my head is pounding, but at least the chest pain is gone.

I crane my neck a little farther and find what I'm looking for:
Tanner
! As the cobwebs continue to clear, I ask him what happened.

“You tell me.” His voice is hoarse. And worried. No, not just worried…he's kind of freaking out. “You threw the fish, bent over, and then…I tried to catch you, but I was too slow. Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry.”

“That's why my head hurts.” I wince in pain when I touch the spot with my hand.

“The bucket broke your fall.”

I look around once more to get my bearings. I'm definitely still on the dock, but sitting rather than standing. Something smells. I look down and see that my shirt is completely soaked. I look down a little father and realize that all of the fish that were in the bucket are now lying around and under me on the wood. In half a second I'm on my feet, scrambling for safety.

Tanner bends down, grabs a couple fish, and tosses them to the sea lions. “There, now we can both say we fed them.” When he says it's time to go home, I tell him flat out that I don't want to.

“But you passed out.”

“So.”

“So? Ann,
you passed out
!
Doesn't that worry you?”

“Not really.”

“Does that happen a lot?”

I don't respond.

“Has it ever happened?”

“Once. The last time I swam.”

“Oh, you mean the time you nearly died? Like I said, we're going home.
Now.
”

“It's no big deal. I just got a little woozy. Seriously, don't let this ruin our date.”

“It's home or the hospital, your call.”

“Home,” I mumble.

He snickers, flashing that adorable crooked smile, and leads me toward the stairs. “Even if you hadn't passed out, you have fish scales all over you. You really want to stay out smelling like that?”

I know he's right.

I wish he wasn't.

I don't want the date to be over, but by virtue of the circumstances, it kind of already is…

I
'M NOT REALLY
much of a snooper. Spying on people just isn't my thing. If I want to know what someone is up to, I prefer just asking them. But this is different. I mean, I was just drawing a picture in my room, minding my own business, when I heard a car pull up. So I went to the nearest window to see who it was, and Cade's binoculars were sitting right there, so I picked them up.

I guess I should have shut the door so nobody could see or hear me, because while I'm staring through the binoculars, I happen to mumble, “Oh crap,” just as my dad is walking up the stairs to check on me.

“Uh, what did you just say, young lady?” he asks as he steps into the room. “You know I don't like that word.” I quickly try to hide the binoculars and wipe the guilty look off my face, but it's too late. “And what, exactly, are you up to?”

“I was just…I mean…Ann's home. Parked outside.”

He checks his watch, then calls downstairs. “Hey, Emily, can you come up here for a second?”

While we're waiting for Mom, I keep trying to steal peeks out the window to see if anything else has happened.

Twenty seconds later, Mom reaches the bedroom door, trailed by Cade. “What's wrong?”

Dad folds his arms. “One of our daughters is spying on another of our daughters. And she swore.”

“I said ‘crap'!” I snap defensively. “That's not swearing. Dad, you say it all the time.”

“Only when I'm mad.”

“Well…
I'm
mad
.”

Mom steps closer to me and looks out the window at the car. “Bree, there's no need to be mad. Or jealous. Just let Ann enjoy herself.”

I fold my arms defiantly. “Look closer, Mom. I think they're fighting.”

My mother puts the binoculars to her eyes and leans in close to the window. “Boy, she doesn't look too happy, does she? I hope her blood pressure is OK.”

Dad puts his forehead against the glass too. “Should we go out and say something to them?”

“No!” gushes Mom. “Leave them be. Maybe they'll kiss and make up.”

“Gross,” Cade mumbles.

“Oh, they're getting out of the car,” says Mom. “How cute! He's making her get back in so he can open her door.”

“But she doesn't seem too happy about it,” I note. “Look at the scowl on her face. Even without the binoculars, I can see—
Duck
!
She saw us!”

Instinctively, the whole family crouches down below the level of the windowsill. A few seconds later the front door opens and Ann calls up the stairs. “Hello! I know you're all up there spying on me. You can come down now.”

“Phew,” says Cade. “That wasn't long enough for a kiss on the doorstep.”

Dad smiles and pats Cade on the back. “Exactly what I was thinking.”

When we come downstairs, Ann is waiting for us in the entryway, still frowning.

“Uh-oh,” says Mom delicately. “I smell trouble.”

Ann's frown deepens. “It's fish, actually.”

The scent hits all of our noses right about the same time. “So the date really stunk, eh?” says Dad, trying to keep things light.

“No. It was great. I just…spilled fish on me.”

Mom cocks her head to the side, smiling. “What were you doing with fish?”

“Oh, like you don't know. We fed them to sea lions.”

“How would I know that?”

“Because it's on my bucket list, on my bed. It's OK, though, I'm glad you told him. It was really fun. Well, most of it was fun.”

“You wrote on your bed?” asks Dad.

“You wanted to feed sea lions?” asks Mom.

Ann isn't buying it. “Whatever. I know you told him.”

“You really stink,” I tell her. “You should go change your clothes.”

Dad agrees with a nod. “Good idea. Ann, you go up and change, then we want to hear all about your fish story.”

Ann turns to her left. “Tanner, are you staying or going?”

“Staying. At least until you tell them.”

“Fine,” she huffs, then marches up the stairs to her room. Five minutes later she returns in sweats. “You didn't say anything, did you?” she asks Tanner as she sits down next to him on the couch.

“Nope.”

Dad crosses one leg over the other. “So what's going on?”

“It's nothing. We shouldn't even be talking about it. In fact I wouldn't if Tanner wasn't forcing me to.”

A small smile tugs at the corner of Tanner's mouth.

“So here's the deal,” continues Ann. “Not a
big
deal, though. Tanner took me to feed sea lions in Astoria, which was way cool. There's this dock there with a big herd of them, and Tanner had a bucket of fish to—”

“Herring,” Tanner clarifies.

“Right. Herring. And so I threw one of the fish to them, and the thing caught it in midair—totally awesome—but then I sort of…
stumbled
, and fell on the bucket of fish, and they got all over me. I was lying in them, actually. On the dock. So then…I was wet and smelled like fish, so we came home early.”

“That's it?” asks Mom.

“Yep.”

Tanner crosses his arms and clears his throat. He obviously thinks there is more to tell.

“Spit it out, Ann,” Dad tells her.

My sister rolls her eyes with a long sigh. “Fine. There was maybe a little bit more than that. See…I sort of, like…passed out a little bit after I threw the fish. That's why I fell. Actually, I hit my head pretty good on the bucket when I went down, so I have a bump up here, but it's really no biggie.” She rubs the left side of her head, just above the ear.

“Oh my gosh!” says Mom.

“You should have called us,” Dad adds. “How long were you out?”

“It was like two seconds!
So
not a big deal. This is why I didn't want to tell you, because I knew you'd blow it way out of proportion.”

Mom stands up and starts pacing. “Ann, we're your parents, so we have the right to be concerned. And this is your life we're talking about. We're not blowing anything out of proportion. We just want you to be safe.”

“Well, I am safe,” she shoots back. “See?” Ann points at herself and smiles. “People pass out all the time, Mom. This has
nothing
to do with my heart.”

“You're sure?”

“Positive. I was just all excited about feeding the sea lions and I jumped and shouted and…I don't know. I think the smell of the fish got to me. I got a little woozy and then…
plop
. Right on the bucket.”

Mom and Dad share a concerned look. “That's it? No sharp pains?”

“None.”

No way…she's lying right to their faces! Am I the only one in this family who can tell when Ann is lying?

“Any other symptoms?”

“Nope. Just a lot of fishy smells, and it made me dizzy.” Dad and Mom still don't seem fully convinced, so Ann throws in a heartfelt,
“Honest.
”

“Fine,” Dad says at length. “If that's all there is to it. But you'd tell us if there was more to tell, right, Ann?”

“Of course, Dad.”

Liar.

He walks over and gives her a half hug, with one arm around her shoulder. “Good. Because any day now you're going to land at the top of that list, and that pager of yours is going to go off, and then we won't have to worry about stuff like this all the time.”

“Can't wait,” she tells him.

Dad lets go of her and extends a hand to Tanner. “Thank you for bringing her straight home. That was very responsible of you.”

Tanner shrugs it off. “It seemed like the right thing to do. Besides, it was either that or risk not getting to go out with her again.” He pauses. “Assuming you'll let us…?”

Dad nods. “Let's just take a day or two to make sure she doesn't have any other episodes like this, but then I'm sure we can probably find a way to make that happen.”

Mom and Dad thank him again, as does Ann, and then he lets himself out.

Even with the window open, the upstairs bedroom is too hot to sleep. Ann is on the bunk below me, but I'm sure she's awake too, thinking about her failed date. I don't get it. Why does this kind of stuff always happen to her? Why is everything always so messed up for her? Would I rather that Tanner liked me? Yes, that's no secret. But as long as she's on a date with him, can't it at least go well?

Is it something about her? Bad luck, perhaps? Or is life really so unfair that a teenage girl who's had a miserable couple of years can't have one good date with the one boy who has ever paid attention to her?

Right now, I'm sure she's asking herself similar questions.

After lying there in silence for a long time, I want some answers.

“So?”

“So what?”

“Are you going to tell me about it?”

She doesn't respond immediately.

“What do you want to know?”

“Well…I guess mostly I want to know why you were fighting in the car.”

She's quiet again, for a long time. Then I hear her roll onto her side. “When we got home, I told him not to mention the whole passing-out thing to Mom and Dad, but he said he signed a contract to keep me safe, so he had to. I kept trying to convince him that I'm fine, but he said if they ever found out that something happened and we didn't tell them about it, they'd never let us go out again.”

“That's true.”

“I know. And it was very sweet of him. I just didn't want to deal with them freaking out.”

“Is that why you lied?”

“When did I lie?”

“About passing out. You said it was from smelling the fish. I've seen you wincing a lot lately. It was from your heart, wasn't it?”

The bed shakes when she flops back onto her back. “Do you know what would happen if I told them the truth about my heart pains? Their kneejerk reaction would be to send us all back to Portland to be closer to my doctors. And what good would that do? Are the doctors going to operate again? No. Are there more medications they can give me to slow down my heart's condition? No. And most importantly, would I be able to go on another date with Tanner if I were all the way in Portland? Definitely not! Don't you see? I had to lie. For all of us.”

“Does Tanner know why you really fainted?”

In a whisper, she replies, “No.” After a few seconds she asks, “Any more questions? Or did you get the rest answered while you were spying on me?”

“I wasn't—That was an accident. I heard you pull up, and I looked out to see who it was. I didn't think it would be you, because it was so early.”

“Yeah, well…it was. But you didn't have to keep watching.”

“Sorry,” I whisper.

“It's…fine. There wasn't much to see anyway.”

“I saw him hug you in the car.”

“Like I said, not much to see.”

“Was it at least a nice hug?”

“Well…yeah. I guess. But I sort of spoiled it.”

“How can you spoil a hug with a cute boy?”

She lets out a long sigh. “After the hug, I opened my big mouth and said, ‘That's all?' I guess I was kind of hoping for something more. I know that's a little forward, but Cade is right—time is running out. Much longer and it might be too late.”

I have to laugh. “Oh my gosh! What did he say?”

“He was all embarrassed. He said, ‘I want to…you know, kiss you, Ann. But not tonight.'” Her voice is low, mimicking Tanner's. “I asked him if he was afraid that kissing me might kill me.”

“And?”

“He said that years from now, when we look back on today, he doesn't want to associate our first kiss with the smell of herring. He said he wants it to be just like
me
.”

“Like what?”

She takes a deep breath, then whispers, “I'm pretty sure the word he used to describe me was ‘perfect.'”

Perfect? Ann? It is SO not fair that I'm not a few years older…

“Good night, Ann.”

“Good night, Bree.”