The Tibetan Yoga of Breath: Breathing Practices for Healing the Body and Cultivating Wisdom (15 page)

Exercise 12

RECOGNIZING OUR DOMINANT EMOTIONAL TENDENCIES

To practice the style of wind energy training presented in this chapter, first establish a focus for the practice. The focus will be your dominant emotional tendency or mind-set. In other words, how do you tend to react emotionally? What emotional tendency would you most like to alleviate? You probably have some idea of the answer to this question because whatever you react to the most probably causes you the most mental and emotional suffering. What kind of emotional reactions cause you the most pain? For example, you might think, “If I didn’t get so angry so often, I’d feel so much better.”

Each of us has a sense of our own temperament; however, we often see ourselves differently than others see us. We sometimes lack insight into ourselves. For example, we might not think of ourselves as a particularly impatient person. However, this perception might not be shared by others whom we interact with on a daily basis. Because we may lack insight into ourselves, we should take time to reflect on and take stock of our dominant emotional habits so we can get a more accurate “self-portrait” before starting these practices.

One way to do this is by talking with a spouse or trusted friend whom you can count on to give you honest and compassionate feedback. You might ask them how they perceive you, or how they characterize you in their own mind. Of course, they will likely offer some positive feedback, but they will probably also share some insight into your vulnerabilities or emotional tendencies.

If this approach is not suitable, another way to gain some insight is to carry a notebook with you during the day. When you notice that you are frustrated or emotionally upset, you can make a note about how you see yourself reacting to emotional triggers.
Later, as these notes and personal reflections accumulate, you can see the common denominators. It might be helpful to keep in mind that several emotional tendencies can play off of one another—maybe you do not just have one!

There are several dominant emotional patterns that might be at work in your mind. Do you notice any of the following patterns in your daily life?

• Some of us are extremely hot-tempered. We become easily angered, impatient, or frustrated.
  
• Some of us are extremely emotionally attached to our friends and loved ones, and have difficulty doing things or making decisions on our own.
  
• Some of us have an extremely strong craving for creature comforts. We might spend all of our resources, both time and money, making ourselves and our environment beautiful.
  
• Some of us are greedy, even at the expense of our own health. We deny ourselves health care, healthy food, and other necessities because they cost money. We might have a poverty mind-set, never feeling that we have enough. We could be so tight with our money that we refuse to spend it, and instead hoard it in the bank, for no other purpose than as savings.
  
• Some of us are extremely neurotic. Our mind has the quality of being a “fire starter.” We make something happen through the sheer power of our suspicions and doubts by finding, and making, trouble even where there is none.
  
• Some of us have the tendency to be jealous. We create disharmony because we feel excluded or not good enough, and have difficulty connecting with others. We can never quite get comfortable with ourselves.
  
• Some of us are extremely arrogant. We need to be the center of attention and we crave praise and the adoration of others.
  

After we have recognized our strongest emotional tendency and established a focus, we use that emotion as the basis for wind energy practice. The practice has two components: a formal sitting practice and an integrated daily-life practice. Each of these aspects will be discussed in detail later in this chapter.

The formal sitting practice can become the main part of our daily wind energy training. The integrated daily practice of wind energy training can be applied on the spot, whenever we see a particular emotional tendency rise up during the day.

M
INDFULNESS AS A
B
ASIS FOR
W
IND
E
NERGY
T
RAINING

Mindfulness is the link between wind energy training and our emotional responses. How does mindfulness enable us to not chase after unhealthy habitual responses and emotional tendencies? To understand this, take a moment to understand how mindfulness works.

In the English language,
mindfulness
is a single word, which many of us have come to understand as meaning “being extremely aware.” In the Tibetan language,
mindfulness
, or
dren she
(Tib. dran shes), is a compound word with two aspects. The first aspect of the word,
dren,
can be translated as “remembering,” and is the aspect of our mind that remembers to practice. The second aspect of the word,
she,
means “introspection.” In the mind, introspection is like a gatekeeper or a shepherd who is constantly watching what is going on around us, what influences are coming into the mind, and what the mind is reacting to. So, reflecting on the Tibetan etymology, when we have true mindfulness, we first notice that the mind has been snagged by something, and then we remember to practice.

Working directly with our emotional tendencies and reactions requires strong mindfulness. Without strong mindfulness, we will not notice when an emotion has arisen in the mind, and we will not realize that we need to apply wind energy training.

How Attachments Form

To introduce how to practice mindfulness as a basis for wind energy training, let’s use the example of the strong emotional tendency of desire. The emotional tendency of desire can manifest in all sorts of ways, such as wanting or seeking material, emotional, or sexual comforts. We might not think of comfort as being an expression of desire. We could use the word
attachment
instead of
comfort
. We express the emotional tendency of desire when we want to possess something or someone, want to maintain a certain experience, or wish to possess someone or something in the future.

Desire is generally an emotion based on the appearance of some kind of form perceived by the eyes. Some forms are extremely pleasing to look at; they almost seem magnetic. We want them as soon as we see them. We feel an emotional attachment to them. Yet we could have other reactions to the perception of form as well. Some forms make us angry, unhappy, or cause us to feel strong dislike. Some forms are completely neutral; we do not even notice them.

We accumulate karma, strengthen our existing emotional patterns, and even create new patterns and habits from our reactions to the forms we see. Another way of saying this is that we accumulate karma and strengthen our emotional tendencies based on chasing after, and wanting to possess, certain perceptions and experiences. For example, if we are caught up in the whirlwind of romantic intrigue, such as at the beginning of a relationship, we are overwhelmed by the intensity of our attachment when we see our beloved. Chasing after that intense feeling and enjoying the energetic charge of that emotion strengthens the emotional tendency of desire.

But desire is not limited to the people we love. We can desire anything the mind is attached to. For example, we might gasp in amazement and awe when we see a beautiful mansion, an expensive and elegant automobile, incredible artwork, or gardens full of flowers. Attachment arises toward anything we find aesthetically
pleasing, if we crave it or wish to possess it. The difficulty is not with the beautiful appearance itself. The difficulty is with the mind’s craving for more. A realized yogi sees the same beautiful appearances without that craving.

When we crave and chase after the forms and sensory experiences that the mind desires, we reinforce the habit of attachment. The more we reinforce the habit of desiring, the more we desire. Without mindfulness, which gives us the ability to break the cycle, we are sure to experience suffering based on these attachments. Ordinary attachment lacks the emotional understanding that our loved ones and the things we love are impermanent, and cannot be kept or maintained. Without this emotional certainty that all of life is impermanent, we are sure to suffer.

Exercise 13

BASIC MINDFULNESS TECHNIQUE

When we have mindfulness and introspection, it’s very easy to apply wind energy training to any scenario we can think of, whether it be pleasant, unpleasant, painful, or distracting. It does not matter if the situation is currently happening, or is something that appears in the mind as a memory or thought that we can’t seem to put down. Even during our sitting practice, the mind is barraged with memories of the past, sensations of the present, and thoughts of the future. Our thoughts and emotions are fueled by our wind energy—the “mount” that keeps the mind in perpetual motion—rather than being a direct result of outer circumstances. If this were not the case, the mind would be calmed simply by being in a quiet room with no distractions. Remember, the outer is a reflection of the inner.

We can use mindfulness at any time to help us calm the wind-mind, whether sitting on the cushion or walking about in our daily life. It can provide us with great emotional support if we cultivate it properly. To understand how mindfulness and wind
energy training break the cycle of unhealthy emotional responses, let’s use the example of a thought or scenario that causes anger to rise up on the wind energy.

First, we actually see, or the mind suddenly remembers or imagines, something that upsets us. Suppose we have worked incredibly hard planning and cooking a special dinner for our beloved. As we begin to share it with them, they push aside the plate saying they do not really like what we’ve prepared and that they would rather order in. The moment that the mind “sees” the scenario unfold, we react with anger and disappointment. Unbelievable! We have worked so hard, and they don’t even appreciate all of the effort we made. Based on that reaction, we accumulate negative karma and strengthen the tendency for the mind to express anger.

However, if in the first moment that the mind sees our beloved not appreciating us, introspection causes us to think, “This makes me feel angry,” and then in the second moment, we remember to focus on the inhalation and exhalation of the breath, we avoid accumulating karma and strengthening that tendency of anger in the mind. The moment we remember to focus on the breath and elongate our inhalation and exhalation, our respiratory rate and the buildup of wind energy in the chest begins to decrease, as does the physical feeling of anger. Here too, wind interacts with how we feel. So, by working with mindfulness, we are actually preventing the accumulation of karma.

Mindfulness practice gives us the choice to take proper and wise action. After focusing on the breath and gaining mental and emotional space, we have new choices available to us. We are able to think clearly and make the best decisions about how to act and what to say, or to evaluate if an action is wise and appropriate in the particular circumstances. We lose the tendency of bouncing around from one thing to the next based on our impulses and reactions.

Working with wind energy training in conjunction with any emotional reaction makes us feel more relaxed. When we relax, our mental and emotional peace of mind grows. How does it feel to be able to let go of something instead of letting it run around
and around through the mind, getting stronger and stronger? This feeling is the true result of practicing meditation and working with wind energy.

Exercise 14