The Thing Itself (23 page)

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Authors: Adam Roberts

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After this time, my lord came to my bed on one occasion, but did nothing more than weep upon my chest &d sleep for a time.

It was soon Summer, &d the birds cried in the air beyond my window. It seem’d that my
Lord
the Judge had been absent for so long a time that I almost forgot me the look of his face, but in
June
he returned to the House &d staid several weeks. Theere was a Change about his manner, &d he was no longer pleased to see me, but marked my presence with signs of displeasure. Such prevalency had wrath in his soule that he struck at all the servants, &d myself also. He came to my roome on three occasions, &d us’d me ill, but it was brief &d he was briefly gone. Hee said not why he was in sutch displeasure with me, save only (I guess it) my disfacement by the fire. At length he summon’d me &d I went to him. He was reading some Papers from off a great table, &d Parson
Wilmot
attended him.

Boy
, he said at length,
I can no longer maintain you at your leisure &d at my Charity. God did not put us heere to lie down &d slepe, but to work
.

I said, humblie I hope, that I had always thought so.

Well, well
, he said.
To work then. I must find you a place on a farm, if ye are hale enough to do farm work. I’ve a farm in Devonshire wheere ye might tend the cowes
.

The thought of this fate as my wished-for escape was strong in my mind at this news, although I vexed myself by weeping at the news, why I know not.

Tis no good mewling like a babe
, said my
lord
the Judge, harshly, &d howlding up his hand, as if in remembrance of the times he had struck me.
Needs must, my boy, needs must. &d I cannot find a place for you heere.

Yet that night my
lord
the Judge visited me againe, &d this time creepingly, coming into my roome when I slept &d waking me with kisses &d afterward Clasp’d me as if he would grapple with me. Then he wept againe, &d begg’d Pardon for my face, &d promis’d he would never let me depart.
I am to blame
, he said, &d then began railing againest himself, &d beating himself with his fists that I became most alarmed at his violence. After, when he had gone &d I trembled alone.

The Parson afterwards said to me and discoursed as to my Lord’s changeable moods.
Nor can I explaine it, excepting that my lord the Judge has a mutable soule, now cheereful now everything melancholic &d black-bile. Yet have I seen him with boyes who would dance at his behest &d him unmov’d, &d heere is this boye without birth or manner, without even Fair Face since yor fall in the fire, &d most of all, Rare!, who flinches from him who could do you so much good, &d actes coy. This is the one who captures his heart. So, so. But it matters not. My work goes well. I’ll confess to you, my boy, as if ye were a Romish confessitor, that I befeared me you had ruined all by hurling yourselfe into the fire. But mayhap this has fastened you closer in his affections. He’ll pay me a thousand Crownes, if you direct him aright!

At this I reasoned that this Parson was concerned to extract monies from my lord, &d hoped to use me to that end.

He went away at this time, &d later returned, telling me that the time was propitious for to meete his masters.

I was curiously affraighted at this News, for partly I was properly alarmed that this meant coming to a Black Masse or suchlike, abomination that the Lord GOD would strike with thunder &d wrath, a
scandalum infiniti
– yet was I also intrigued, with the curiouseness of a sapient mind, to discover whom these masters were.

The Parson did not take me away to these Beings this day, nor yet the next; neither did my lord the Judge visit me againe, save only to stoppe in a door-arch &d gaze at me as I swept a fireplace one morning, &d he sighed &d Rubbed his beard with great force as if caught up in some turmoil of the soule. My Hearte did rattle in my breast like a coach-wheel over cobbles, for I beleaved he would come into the roome &d use me as was his habit, but insteade he turned &d went away, tho slowly.

That night I lay me down &d slept as ever I had, but the Parson came sleekit into my roome &d woke me with a Hand upon my face.
Come now, boy
, he said.
The Moone is at full, &d this badge pleaseth my masters. By this lamp we shall make our way, &d feare no bandit, for rather they should feare us.

I pulled my breeches on &d shoes in a fumble, & I did not bethink me to gainsay this command, for I was not altogether awake. But stepping down the stairway, &d through the door into the Night woke me somewhat. Though the air was mild, yet the freshness touched my skinne &d I ope’d my eyes. Heere was my lord’s herb garden, all closed about by a wall; &d thro’ the ebon door at the far side heere was my lord’s lawn, on which he would sometimes play at quoyits. The grass beseemed black to my eyes, tho the Moone was sharply bright &d silver, glowing enough to throw long shadows. The Parson, who led my steps, seemed more giddie than ever before I had seen him, &d he fair pranced down the slopeing lawn towards that place wheere the River bounded my lord’s estate.

What hour is it
? he asked me.

I replyed that I knew not the time.

But I do, my lad
, he said.
It is past midnight, when the lampe burns blue &d the sky drapes itself in Royal Purple. Then ’tis the hour that the great Monarch of the upper world enters into his closet. Do ye know his name?

You are pleased to sporte with me sir
, I said.

I may believe my masters shall be well pleased with me
, he said.
Well pleased with what I bring them. An August month for an august proceeding
. &d heere he tweaked my cheek, as a man chucks a babies face, which I liked not.

We came betimes to the waters edge, &d heere we rested. The Parson tooke from his cloake a flint, or ovall of ivory, &d peered at it.
My boy
, he said,
you must prepare yourself. You are not to crie out in horror, for that might displease my masters.

Are the formes of deviltry so terrible?
I asked.

Deviltry?
said the Parson.
Why Thomas, who said twould be devils that attend our meeting? Sainte Peter himselfe! Saint Peter himselfe.

I kept my owne counsel at this.

We waited for a further halfe of an houre, or perhaps more. I could not resist the yawning that overcame me, &d notwithstanding the curiouseness I felt to discover what blacke masse the Parson was attendant upon I craved to sleepe againe. But the Parson did pinch me &d keep me from nodding.

Theere was silence for a long while, &d then the Parson did break it with a long speeche.
That doctrine is well-knowne
, he said,
wheereby the four elements of this worlde are peopled with creatures of a Forme &d species less corporeal than vulgar mortals. The wize Theophrast Paracelsus hath delineated this in his workes of philosophie. Those from the fierie regions do we calle
Scalamanders
, who beget kinges &d heroes with spirits that resemble their deietical sires; those from water we call
Nymphs
, &d such lovely inhabitants as dwell in that element. Those of the earth, earthie, are called
Gnomes
or
Fairies
or some times
Elfs
. Those of the air are
Sylphes
, &d it is these Sylphes that shall attend our revels this faire night.

&d howe
, I asked,
do these Sylphes appeare themselves before us?

As beings like to themselves
, he replied, &d againe he peered close at his flintstone, or whate’er he held, for I sawe not.

Do ye see the moon, master Thomas?
he asked me, shortly. &d in truth I could not miss seeing it, for it seemed larger than ever before I had seen it, glassie &d white &d shyning with a tide of light.

I do
, said I.

Diana herself, the ancients thought
, said the Parson, looking up.
But do ye see the mountains &d lakes in her Globe? Such pocks upon the goddess her face as a courtesan might fear from her
mal d’amour.
Have you ne’er considered what creatures may live in that place?

I had not til that moment bethought me of this question, &d said so to the Parson.

Yet I assure you that
the Moone
is a worlde, &d that it is inhabited. But this carries in its traine certaine questions of great import. For think ye: these Beings in this globe, created as the Divines tell us by
GOD
Almighty. &d aske yourself, how are they saved? Are they redeemed in the bloode of Christ, as are we? But how can that be, if Christ died in our world &d not theirs – &d if Christ took the forme of a man of our world, &d not a being of theirs? So are they redeemed in the bloode of their owne Saviour, who took the forme of their being, &d was cruxified upon a device fitted to their frame? But then theere were two Christs, not one, tho the Bible promised us our unique &d special favour in God taking man’s corpus. &d if two, why not three, or ten, or ten thousand? Or are theere as many Christs as theere be graynes of sand upon a beach? If so, then why do we worshipp the Christ instructed us by the Church that hath taken his name? For He is in no wise special. Perhap we should chuse another.

At this moment I felt a great turning-over in my bowells, as of fear, tho theere was naught to Hand at which I might be affrighted, save onlie the Parson who was no different to his selfe as always was. But I trembl’d with this feare, &d turned me around, &d about againe, expecting to see a Spectre or Ghoust approach.

Sir,
I cried,
I like not this place.

It is a charming spott
, he said, speaking tightly, yet perchance in jest.

I beg you sir
, I cryed, falling upon my knees in the wette grass,
if you can by any meanes prevail upon your Conscience to release me heere, I beseech you so to do, not scrupling anything for feare I should report to any person of what has passed, for I shall not, but onlie to have mercie upon my distress.

Fie, Master Tickletumble
, he said, mockingly,
do ye quail? Are you a man or a babe at suck?

Tho he spoke lightly &d in jeste, yet his Wordes might have been cries of great wrath for the effect they had upon me. I quail’d further, &d I beleeve I whimpered like a whipt dog. O I tryed to speake, but no wordes came beyond a stammer of
Pa-pa-pa
. I was on the grass, &d tiny &d fearful. Then they came &d fill’d me &d I stood up. Yea, I stood up as a flame stands from the summit of a candle, &d life was in me. My former pusillanimity &d timidity sloughed from me, &d I stood tall &d strong.

The Parson, seeing this change in me, shewed a change in his Countenance also. In the clasp of his great excitement he danced before me.
Are they in ye now, my lad?
He cried.
&d how do ye? Do they communicate?

But I was far beyond him now. I took him &d placed the padde of my Thumb &d Forefinger upon the skinne of his throat, such that he gasped &d gasped as a fishe without water. But I cockt my eare, as a hound does, to attend to the wordes of such Sylphis as were now speaking to me, or better to saye not speaking, for theere were neither speeche nor wordes in their discourse, but in some wize to reache me with sapience &d thought. Theirs were not Wordes, I saye againe: or (for it is precious harde to catch the truth of it in my saying) perhap their Wordes were Wordes of
Aire
, which is their element, &d the grosser matter of my ear was poorly tuned to it. Yet could I hear them, &d they were drawne to me, as the Parson had said.

&d. Peter spake

&d. he had searchd for me, over great times, as seventeen years, and two hundred and eighty-nine years, and more.

&d my sight &d hearing was wondrous increas’d, such that I felt the coming of divers gentlemen who in converse with one &d another reveal’d themselves to be colleagues of the Parson, come to revel in the Black Masse. Tho they were yet on the far side of the river I reach’d out for them anyway &d stay’d their path. These gentlemen, who were unknown to me quite, yet they lay down up’n their backs &d cried in fearful paine, for I had seiz’d their Ribbes &d their Spines &d rolled them twixt my fingers like pastry.

I shall have more to say of these gentlemen anon; for they were men in
conspiratus
with the Parson, &d soon I was finisht with them.

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