The Sinner's Bargain (Contracts & Deceptions #2) (20 page)

“She’s not your anything,” Colin replied in a menacingly low tone that made the hairs on the back of Amara’s neck stand up.

Philip smiled at that. “I admire your tenacity, Mr. Wolfe, but this is not the time for you to try to be a knight in shining armor. Why don’t you do us all a favor and get out of the car, go back inside, pick up your fiancée—“

“She’s not my fiancée.”

“No? Didn’t seem that way.”

“Fuck you. I don’t answer to you.”

“No, but you answer to Samuel.”

“He answers to me.”

Philip chuckled while Amara shifted in Colin’s hold and shot him a curious look. “What does Samuel have to do with anything?”

“Samuel has a lot invested in Wolfe,” Philip said, smiling. “He would hate to see his little protégé throw it all down the drain because he refuses to marry before Benjamin takes over the company. I don’t think anybody wants to see what would happen if Benjamin were to take over, do you, Mr. Wolfe?”

Colin’s hand shook and gripped Amara’s with a force that made her yelp and pull away. “Go to hell. You think I don’t have anything on you? You think you’re the only one who uses information to blackmail?”

Amara looked at Philip, whose smile was only slightly defused by Colin’s words. Shaking her head, she put a hand over Colin’s and spoke before any of them had another chance.

“What do you want?” she asked Philip.

“I will tell you as soon as he gets out of the car.”

“He’s not getting out. You might as well drive where you need to go.” Her hand squeezed Colin’s to keep him from speaking.

“Very well. It’s his funeral,” Philip said with a shrug. He paused to tell the driver where to go and shrugged when he saw it register in Amara’s face that they were headed to the hospital. “You left this behind. The nurse called, Anna isn’t doing very well. I figured we would go there first since you may not have a mother tomorrow.”

Amara blinked and blinked again. Philip tossed her phone and she was glad Colin caught it for her, because it would have hit her head. He held it out for her and she took it, scrolling through the numbers as if on autopilot. Three missed calls from the hospital. Her finger shook as she selected the last call, and once it started ringing, her heart lodged itself in her throat as she waited for a response.

“Amara!” the nurse said, and if her shrill voice was any telling of the situation, Amara wasn’t sure she could handle the words that came next. “I’ve been trying to reach you. She’s taken a turn for the worse. Her blood count is too low—you need to come in.”

Amara’s mouth opened, but nothing would come out.
Taking a turn for the worse. You need to come in
.

“Hey,” Colin said, concern etched in his voice as he took the phone from Amara’s hand. “She’ll be right there,” he told the nurse, hanging up as he pulled her toward him. As he held her, Amara was thankful he hadn’t gotten out of the car. She knew that had she been alone—or alone with Philip—she would have completely fallen apart.

Colin’s warmth held her together. The strong grip he held her with told her everything would be okay, even though she knew some of the worst was yet to come. Amara took a deep breath and gathered her thoughts as best she could before pushing away from Colin. She looked at him, into his eyes, the ones that said he would be there, that everything would be okay no matter what, and she nodded as she took a deep breath. She wasn’t going to panic, not until she knew what was going on. Her mother had taken a turn for the worse before, five years ago, and here they were. Amara would not panic. Still, as she sat in the limo holding Colin’s hand, the air pregnant with silence, she couldn’t help but wonder if her mother’s sudden turn wasn’t a natural cause. Was it Philip making good on his threat?

“You poisoned her.” Amara’s voice didn’t shake with the accusation, but her eyes felt like they were firing dart as she stared at Philip. “You fucking bastard! You told the nurse to inject her with whatever it was you threatened me with!” She lunged at Philip before Colin could react quickly enough to stop her. Her fist met Philip’s face first, landing on his jaw. Her other fist came up, but he was ready for that one and grabbed her hands. Colin’s arms circled Amara’s waist and pulled her back. His calming words were lost on her as she continued to thrash against him in attempt to claw at Philip once more.

“I had nothing to do with it!” Philip shouted, nursing his jaw.

The ache in Amara’s chest became unbearable, and the hot tears that were sad just minutes ago were now fueled with anger as they slid down her face. “You’re lying! You’re a liar! You wanted to kill my mother!” she cried. Her mournful shouts were muffled by Colin’s chest as he pulled her closer to him.

“We’re going to go see her now. She’ll be okay. Everything will be okay,” he said to her head, but the conviction in his voice was wavering as it hit him that it very well may not be okay. You couldn’t just shout comfort into the universe and hope it caught on and gave it back.

“Nothing is okay,” she said, her slim shoulders quaking as she sobbed against him.

BY THE TIME the limo pulled up to the hospital, Amara had recovered and wiped the tears from her face. Although her eyes were swollen, she looked composed for the most part.

“I’m coming up with you,” Colin said as he helped her get out of the limo, but Amara shook her head.

“Not right now,” she whispered, looking up at him. She was thankful for his support, but she needed to see her mom on her own.

“I won’t go in, I’ll sit in the waiting room; I’ll wait outside her door—whatever you want—but I’m not leaving you alone right now.”

When they reached her floor, Amara didn’t walk to the hospital room, she ran, tossing her heels aside and picking up her dress on the way there. There was just no way that this was really happening. It couldn’t be. Maybe she should have been grateful for all of the time she’d had with her mom. She could’ve died sooner and not lived a full life. Still, Amara wasn’t able to be grateful for that because she couldn’t think past the pain stabbing her heart. And even though she should have had time to prepare for this inevitability, Amara couldn’t fathom a world without her mother in it. She didn’t want to. She wasn’t ready.

The pain inside her heart radiated through her entire body as she pushed the door open and caught a glimpse of her mom in the bed—pale, IV dripping, and an oxygen mask strapped to her gaunt face.

“Did you come by yourself?” her mother asked in a voice that was barely over a whisper. Amara sat on the bed and cradled her mother’s cold arm on her lap and responded in a voice that was just as quiet, just as broken.

“Yes,” she said, keeping her head down. She couldn’t bear to look at Anna’s face—not yet. Amara focused on her mother’s fingers. They were cold and frail. She still wore her wedding ring, despite everything. She’d said after so many years, she would feel naked without it, and that some of the years were good —despite the man her husband had become. Amara hadn’t argued with her, even though she’d felt her mother was celebrating a ghost of a man and not a good marriage.

“I’m glad you came by today,” Anna said, and Amara could tell the oxygen tank was working overtime to help her lungs. She finally looked at her mother’s face—her beautiful face. It was possible to see she used to be lovely despite her almost skeletal state. She still had beautiful green eyes, almond shaped just like hers, and perfect, porcelain skin. Anna wore a hijab on her head now, Amara suspected, because her father was no longer around and she was in the presence of male doctors. It was something they never discussed. Religion wasn’t always a big deal growing up. Both of her parents turned their backs on Allah when they were shunned from their home. They never taught Amara to believe in anything in particular. “Be a good person” was their motto. Sex was never discussed, but Amara knew they were big on waiting until marriage, although she didn’t follow that rule and she was sure they knew it, especially now. Still, they never treated her like she was dirty for it, not until her father had shamed her at the gala.

Amara leaned forward, lying beside her mother on the bed, feathering the tips of her fingers across Anna’s cheeks, her small pointy nose, her chin, and back up to the cream colored hijab that covered her bald head.

“Do you want me to get you a Sunni for prayer?”

Anna smiled at her thoughtful daughter. “There is no time for that now. A Catholic priest came by and read me my rites.” Amara’s eyes filled with tears and this time, she couldn’t stop them from spilling.

“Are you in pain? Is there anything at all I can do to make this better?”

“You’re here. That’s all that matters.”

Amara began to cry harder. “There must be something I can do for you.”

“There’s nothing, my daughter. Death only requires a little patience, nothing else.”

“I don’t want you to die,” Amara said, her words almost inaudible through her tears. “I’m not ready!”

“Neither am I,” Anna whispered, tears gathering in her own eyes. “I don’t want to leave you by yourself without knowing you’ll be safe. I wanted to be around to see my grandchildren—to take care of them and watch what an amazing mother you’ll be to them.

They wrapped their arms around the other and held on tight, the way they used to do when Amara was just a girl and she’d been awakened by night terrors.

“I’ll always be with you. Every time you look up at the
khorshid,
you will be reminded of me, and whenever it’s not shining bright, look in a mirror, at those beautiful eyes that have enough light to power muted colonies. You’ll find me everywhere, Mara. In your heart, in your words, in your love…I’m only physically leaving you.”

“But who will I talk to? Who will I tell things to? Who will I go to with my problems? I’ll have no one,” Amara cried.

“You can still talk to me; you’ll just have to wait a little longer for your answers. You’ll have Colin. Don’t let that boy go this time. He has my blessing.”

Amara tilted her head up to look at her mother’s face as she waited for her explanation.

“He came by to see me the other day and asked for it. He knew it was important to you.”

“I saw him talking to Dad, laughing with him,” Amara whispered as she wiped tears from her eyes.

“They do business together, love, that’s something you’ll have to learn to deal with.”

“I don’t know if I can.”

“Tell Colin. I’m sure if he knows that, he’ll stop laughing with him,” Anna joked. Amara smiled; it was unbelievable that the woman could still find her sense of humor through the pain.

“I always loved seeing you and papa together, you know? Growing up, I always thought that was real love—that was what I wanted for myself.”

“It was real love.” Her mother said it with a small smile. “He saved me from a monster. My father wanted me to marry his second-in-command, this terribly ugly man. He was just as ugly on the inside as he was out. He tried to rape me once, and your father was able to stop him. When he tried again, I wasn’t so lucky. Amir beat him to an inch of his life, then resigned his position with my father and took me with him.”

Amara turned her body in the bed so she could pay closer attention. She’d never heard the story before.

“At first I didn’t want to go. I said no to your father. I stayed behind for three days,” Anna continued. “When I approached my father with what had happened, he beat me and called me a liar—a whore—and said I was sleeping around with Amir, who had been nothing but respectful to me. That man—that disgusting man—all round and scarred and terrible, had taken my virginity from me. Something sacred that I’d been saving for my husband… and he just took it because he deemed it right. As he raped me, he kept saying that he knew I wasn’t a virgin and he was going to prove it.” Her mother didn’t shed a tear as she retold her story, but took a couple of pauses in between words to sip on some water to soothe her dry throat. “So finally, on the third night, when I could stand again from my father’s beating, I left and never returned. Philip took me to Amir, who lived in a shack for a house, and that’s where we stayed. We married, and I was pregnant shortly after, by Amir, thank heaven. Philip somehow got my father to give us money.”

“How do you think he managed that? I mean, after everything your father did to you?” Amara asked quietly, holding on to her mother’s hand once more.

“He wouldn’t say. I suppose it could have been his money, or money he stole from my father. I guess I’ll never know for sure, but I was always grateful.”

“Is that why you were okay with me working at Méchant?”

Anna inhaled a long breath and exhaled in a heavy cough. “No. I wanted you to go because I knew Philip could protect you from the men trying to get to you.”

Amara had heard this story before. It was what her mother had replied when Amara had confessed to the contract.

“Mom, I have to tell you something…I have to go to Paris because I signed a contract with Philip, to protect Dad and to help you. Dad is in a huge bind.”

“Oh, Mara. I know.”

“You know how bad it’s gotten? He can’t even afford the house anymore.” Tears beckoned as the reality hit her about how their lives would be affected in the future. She was raised in that house, and sure, they didn’t need the ten thousand square feet it boasted, but it was still home.