The Secrets of Boys (23 page)

“I was hardly
there
,” Joe pointed out. “I mean, I was several states away.”

“I know; how ironic is that?” Cassidy said. “You were pretty far away, but sometimes you felt like my closest friend. Like when I called you freaking out about my face the night of my anniversary with Eric?”

“It wasn’t really your face you were freaking out about,” Joe said.

“True, but you helped me figure that out. I mean, even if you hadn’t, it was just so great of you to talk me down that night.”

“Hey, that’s what I’m here for,” Joe said. “People freak out. It’s normal. People freaked out at Camp Crackhead all the time. I kind of got used to it—

although dealing with your freak-out was way more pleasant than talking Lloyd out of killing a counselor so that he could go to jail and become a big-time dealer’s bitch and get some good drugs for a change.”

“That’s the weirdest compliment I’ve ever gotten,”

Cassidy said. “I think I’m going to use that as my year-book quote.”

“What? I thought we both vowed to use ‘let it pee.’”

Cassidy giggled at the memory of singing with Joe in sixth-grade chorus. “Oh, my God, why did we think it was
so funny
when we sang ‘let it pee’ instead of ‘let it be’? I haven’t thought of that in ages.”

She had missed Joe, she realized. Not just over the summer, but for the past few years. Joe snorted a little as he laughed. Cassidy couldn’t explain why it sounded sort of cute.

“So did Camp Crackhead end up being as awful as you expected?”

“Even worse.” Joe laughed. “Sometimes I thought I would be stuck in a moldy cabin in Idaho for the rest of my life. But I guess it ended up being worth it in the end. It was, like, a ‘growth experience’ or something.”

Cassidy laughed and unwrapped an egg, letting the chocolate melt slowly in her mouth. Leaves rustled against the roof of the tree house, and the smell of cut grass wafted up from the lawn. Even the shadows falling across her bare ankles seemed like they were in the perfect place.

“How about for you?” Joe asked. “I know your life was pretty turbulent for a while there, but did things turn out as bad as you expected?”

“I guess not,” she said. “I mean, so much happened.

I was friends with Larissa and then I wasn’t, I was dating Eric and then I wasn’t, and then I was dating Zach and then I wasn’t. It feels like it all happened so fast.”

“That’s how I feel about—I don’t know, everything,”

Joe said. “In a split second, your entire life can change.”

Cassidy leaned back against the rough wooden walls of the tree house and stretched her legs out in front of her. Her ankle brushed against Joe’s and she left it there, feeling the fine golden hairs on his legs tickling her skin.

“Hey, I have something for you too,” Joe said around a mouthful of Cadbury chocolate. He reached under a pillow and brought out a present wrapped in plain green paper and tied with twine, which he held out shyly toward her.

Cassidy gently eased her thumb under the tape. “You didn’t have to wrap it.”

“But I wanted to.”

Joe smiled expectantly as Cassidy peeled the wrapping off to reveal a small paperback book.

“The Meaning of Mindfulness,”
she read, turning it over in her hands. A tiny, elderly Tibetan monk with twinkling eyes smiled at her from the cover. The book smelled of wood smoke and pine tar. It was obviously the same copy Joe had read alone in the wilderness.

“This book helped change my life,” Joe said. “I hope it’ll help you too.”

Cassidy didn’t say anything. She just threw her arms around his neck. She meant for the hug to last only a second and be a friendly way of saying “thank you,” but she held on for a little longer and tighter, thinking of all the good times she and Joe had together back in middle school and how she wanted to have more times like that with him. She remembered how he had been there for her over the summer, all the wonderful things he had said and how he had tried to keep her grounded when she thought she might come undone.

“I missed you,” she whispered in his ear.

“I missed you too,” he said quietly. “But I’m here now.”

Looking back, it wasn’t the hug that stayed fresh in Cassidy’s mind. It was how she felt when she gazed into Joe’s eyes. A new year was ahead of her, and it was as if there were no more secrets for her to uncover. She’d found out everything she needed to know.

Hailey Abbott

grew up in southern California, where she split her time between creative writing and creative beaching. She is the author of SUMMER BOYS, NEXT SUMMER: A Summer Boys Novel, THE BRIDESMAID, GETTING LOST WITH BOYS, and THE

SECRETS OF BOYS. Hailey now lives in New York City.

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Typography by Joel Tippie

Cover art ©2006 by GettyImages

Cover design by Sasha Illingworth

THE SECRETS OF BOYS. Copyright © 2006 by Alloy Entertainment. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.

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