The Secret Love of a Gentleman (44 page)

She longed to hold his arm. But she thought it might make it harder for him to walk.

Love swelled within her as they talked. But when she asked him about his accident, his answers became evasive. He asked her not to tell anyone his leg had been broken because he did not like to be fussed over.

He was still stalwart and idealistic. That was what his desire to be married in St George’s was about, because he would not do anything less than he ought to.

She did not mind that he was, though. They were good qualities and his determination had helped her break the glass prison she’d created for herself.

She would be proud of him, and their child would be proud of its father.

Her fingers pressed over her stomach, over the slight bump hidden beneath her cloak as she felt a flutter of movement within her.

“You know, they are going to make a fuss,” Rob stated when they reached the Duke’s property. “All my family are still here. Because of my accident they did not return home at the end of the autumn season, as they normally would. We will not tell them about the child, though. You do not obviously show. We will keep it our secret.”

She nodded. It would probably embarrass him. Yet would they not think her presence in London, and the two of them suddenly arriving, odd?

The butler, Finch, opened the door. “Mr Marlow and Lady Caroline.” He bowed, as though it was not at all odd that she’d turned up unexpectedly.

Rob nodded at him and walked past, heading towards the stairs.

Caro longed for Rob to take her hand, but when he reached the stairs he gripped the banister and his limp became more pronounced. He must have been severely hurt. She wished she had been told.

He took her hand at last as they walked along the landing. The sound of conversation called them forward.

A tremor ran through her.

“You need not worry,” he said in a low voice.

He seemed different. There was something new in the tone of his voice. More confident.

“Ready?” he asked as they stood outside the drawing room.

“Yes.”
No.

He lifted her fingers to his lips and kissed the back of her glove. Then he led her in, walking straighter, as though he tried to hide his limp.

“I have a visitor,” he stated, lifting her hand.

She bobbed a curtsey to the room in general, relieved to see that it was only his close family, his mother and father, and his sisters, and the Duke and Duchess. His mother stood, the look on her face expressing shock.

“You did not say you were travelling today… and you did not take your curricle,” his father stated as he stood.

“I did not travel, Caro did.”

His father threw Rob an odd look. There was a question in his eyes as he smiled.

Rob let her hand go and took off his hat, then set it aside. A footman immediately appeared to pick it up.

His father walked forward.

“Caro and I are engaged to be married,” Rob said to the room.

“Robbie!” His sisters, Helen and Jenny, squealed, stood and ran at him.

“Steady,” he urged them as their arms wrapped about his middle.

“Congratulations,” Kate said to Caro.

“Thank you.”

Rob’s mother, Ellen, came forward and gripped both of Caro’s hands. “Are you happy? But of course you must be, you came to town. I assume you must have come to speak with Robbie.”

Caro nodded as the heat of a blush flooded her cheeks. It was not the normal way of things.

“I am more than pleased for you, son.” His father embraced Rob as the girls wished Caro well.

The Duke stood before Rob, holding out his hand, as Rob’s father took hers.

“Caroline. I am thrilled,” he said quietly. “I have thought you a part of our family for a long time, and so I shall not say welcome. I shall be very glad to think of you as a daughter.”

“This ought not to be a surprise, I suppose,” John said to them both, “after the two of you formed such a friendship in the summer. But I am still surprised.”

Rob settled an arm about her shoulders.

“Robbie let Caroline take her bonnet off and come and sit down, you look peaked, Caroline.” Ellen smiled at her.

Rob’s arm slid from her shoulders, and he turned to pull the ribbons of her bonnet loose as she looked at him. Then he lifted her bonnet from her head and passed it to the footman, who had taken his hat, before beginning to unbutton her cloak.

There were four buttons across her chest and he struggled with them a little, as though his right hand was stiff. He slid her cloak off and passed it to the footman.

Her hand hovered near her stomach, afraid someone might notice the slight curve.

“Helen, would you ring for tea and ask for some warm chocolate too? I think Caroline is in need of a little sustenance.” Rob’s mother requested. “What time did you set out, Caroline?”

“At seven. But I took tea in a shop, while I was waiting to see Rob.”

He sighed, as though he felt responsible for her having not eaten luncheon.

Caro breathed deeply. Rob held her hand. “May we sit?” he said quietly. His limp was much more pronounced when he began to walk. She felt as though she ought to help him.

They sat next to each other on a sofa.

“Mama, you will have to help us. We wish to be married as soon as possible. I am postponing my journey to Yorkshire and I would like the wedding to take place in St George’s.”

“Then you will have to speak with the vicar, and the banns must be read.”

Rob looked at Caro. “I will speak with him tomorrow, before I take you home.”

“Yes.”

“Kate, I have made a presumption. Caro was due to travel back by mail coach. She has already missed it, I’m afraid. Would you mind finding a room for her here?”

“Of course! She will be welcome. I shall ask Finch to let the housekeeper know and have a room made ready, and another place laid for dinner.”

“I’m sorry. I have nothing to wear for dinner.”

“Never mind, there are only a few of us, we may be informal. It will not be the first time,” John stated, smiling at her. Then he looked at Rob.

They wished her out of the room. They wanted to speak to Rob alone and discover the truth about the sudden engagement. She wished she had insisted on going home.

“Will you have bridesmaids?” Georgiana asked.

“I think not, we will be planning everything in a hurry so that we might travel to Rob’s new property. I’m sorry.”

“You need not be sorry,” Rob said, his hand reaching out to hold hers.

She smiled at him. She would rather be alone with him too.

“Here is some chocolate,” his mother stated as she brought some over from a tray a maid had delivered.

Caro took it, her cheeks warm, as pain stabbed at her heart. She felt as though she’d snuck up like a thief to steal Rob from them, having hidden in the heart of their family for years.

~

Caro retired early, rising from the dinner table and excusing herself, too early for Rob to follow without it looking wrong, and once she’d retired, Kate, his mother and sisters rose to leave Rob, his father and John to their port.

“She came to you…” His father stated as soon as the women had gone.

“Yes. She was waiting for me at my apartment.”

“You had no idea.”

“No.” Rob’s heart beat out a sharp rhythm, while discomfort leaned heavily on his shoulders. He had not wholly adjusted to the reason she’d been waiting for him. He wished to speak with her…A child… “But this is what I wished for. You know it is.”

“Yes,” his father sighed, “although I had not imagined it to be so immediate. But we shall be happy for you, and supportive.”

John smiled broadly. “Mama will love it. She, at last, has a wedding to plan. She was deprived by Mary and I.”

Rob laughed, but it had a bitter note. He did not think his mother would be so happy when the news was out that he would be a father in mere months. Perhaps he would tell them after the wedding, and let her live in happy ignorance until he and Caro left for Yorkshire.

He swallowed his port.

“You are still so young,” his father said, “at least when John surprised us he was older. Yet you have common sense in droves, and I shall trust in that.” His father leaned across to top up Rob’s glass. They had dispensed with servants, so the conversation would remain private.

Rob covered the glass with his hand. “No, I will retire. Which room is Caro in, John?”

“Your Mama would be horrified if she heard you ask that question,” his father answered.

“I only wish to speak with her. I want to ensure she is not distressed. It will have been difficult for her this evening.”

“The second floor, on the right, the third door along,” John responded.

Rob rose and nodded at them both, before turning to walk out.

“It had better only be to talk!” his father shouted.

Rob turned and smiled. “It is none of your business.”

John laughed.

Rob wished for the flexibility in his leg to be able to easily jog upstairs, in case someone came, but he did not have it, and so he painfully and slowly climbed the stairs and found his way to her door. Then he knocked quietly, “Caro.”

“Rob…”

“May I come in?”

“Yes.”

She’d left a candle burning by the bed, but she was in bed, and the covers were tucked up beneath her chin. She rolled to her side looking at him.

“How are you?”

A worried sound slipped past her lips. “Tired, but I cannot sleep.”

“Why?”

“Because I am so hopeful and yet so scared.”

He crossed the room to be near her. “What are you worried over?”

“That I will lose the child and that when your family find out about it they will dislike me.”

“You need not worry over my family. The blame will be put on me.”

“It will not. Even Drew guessed that I had begun this, because you are too decent.”

Rob laughed. “Except that that is not true. You did not force me into anything, Caro.”

She smiled at last, slightly. It was the first true smile he’d seen from her today. At the beginning of the summer that was all he’d wished for—to see her smile, dance and laugh. Look what it had become.

“May I share your bed? It will feel lonely if I sleep in my own. All I wish for is to hold you.”

She nodded, her plaited hair brushing over the linen.

He began unbuttoning his evening coat.

“You look very handsome in dinner dress. I have missed seeing you wear it.”

He smiled. “I have missed you in every setting.”

When he wore only his shirt, he snuffed out the candle and then lifted the covers to join her beneath them. The sheets were cold, but Caro was warm. She turned her back to him, and so he lay close behind her and put his arm about her, his hand resting against her stomach, to find hers there, as though it cradled the child.

He kissed the spot behind her ear, then whispered. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.”

Chapter 40

When Caro woke, Rob had gone. She rolled to her other side and smelled the pillow he’d slept on, his cologne had seeped into it.

She rose and called for a maid to help her dress, so she might break her fast with the family. Rob was not at the table when she entered the room. She looked at the clock. It was almost twelve. She had not slept so soundly for months.

“Rob went out riding,” his father stated.

It was only his father and mother there. They’d finished eating and were drinking coffee. Perhaps they’d been waiting for her.

“Sit down and eat, Caroline,” his mother encouraged.

They talked of her new cottage, not Rob. She’d assumed they were angry, but they did not seem to be.

A rush of cold air swept into the room when the door was opened, and Rob was there, still in his outdoor clothes, which carried the scent of the cold winter air. He walked forward. “I have spoken to the vicar, Caro, the first banns will be read this Sunday. They must be read three times and then we are to be married the following Tuesday. I have also posted an announcement in the paper, which will appear tomorrow, advising the world of our engagement.”

He looked at his father. “I have sent word to let Uncle Robert know he may travel without me. Caro and I will follow later.”

“Do you think he would leave and miss the wedding? He would not. He will not travel himself when he hears. Your mother and I will call on him today. You are keeping us all in London for an age, Robbie.”

He smiled. “Caro, when you are ready, we’ll leave. I wish to call into Drew’s before taking you home.”

“I am ready now. I’ll fetch my bonnet and cloak.” She rose.

“Is that coffee warm, Mama?”

“Yes.”

“I shall drink a cup then while I wait for you to come back, Caro.”

She smiled when she left the room. She felt as though she’d seen through a window into a future that was now possible for her. Her parents’ home had not been like this, nor had her marriage with Albert, and yet her marriage with Rob might include quiet, companionable breakfasts and family dinners.

She felt the same about her marriage as she did about her child: hopeful, excited and yet equally afraid, although she could not even say why she was afraid about her marriage.

Perhaps it was only because they had not really had a chance to talk.

~

When Rob drove up to the front of Drew’s house he was suffering from the events of the last hours, shock had settled on his shoulders like a cloak. They had driven out of London in silence, mostly. He hadn’t known what to say. He was to be a father, not only a husband. It did not seem real. Yet Caro sat beside him as testimony to the fact that those hours had occurred. He’d not dreamt them.

It was a physical pain to think that she’d known all this time and not spoken, and yet he’d never thought to ask, and so he bore his own guilt.

He’d called at his club after visiting the vicar, only for a few moments, but he’d wished to see his friends before they discovered his whereabouts through an announcement in the paper.

Their disbelief had echoed within him as exclamations rang. “You are too young to hang yourself in a parson’s noose.”