The Right Time (50 page)

‘I know,' she sniffed, pulling back to look at Emma. ‘It's just such a relief. I've been so worried, ever since that day, knowing what could happen . . .'

Emma took her hands in hers. ‘And I didn't listen to you. You must have been so angry with me. I've been on the internet at home, and it's terrifying. I came so close, I can't believe it. I was sure today we'd find out . . .' Her voice petered out, and Blake stood up and put his arm around her.

Emma took a breath. ‘I dodged a bullet, I know that, and it's only because of you, Liz. If you hadn't pushed me to have that mole removed, and then called Blake . . . well, there's no question what would have happened. I don't know how to thank you, Liz, I owe you –'

‘You owe me nothing,' she said. ‘Except to stay away from solariums.'

‘Don't worry,' said Blake. ‘They're out of bounds from now on.'

‘Like I need to be told that,' Emma assured them.

‘And, look, you are going to have to have regular check-ups,' said Liz.

‘Of course.'

‘Seriously, every six to eight weeks at first. This is not me overreacting,' she insisted. ‘I hate to put a dampener on things, but you do have a higher chance of recurrence. But now that we're aware of it, we can keep a close eye on you, and anything that crops up will be detected early and dealt with straightaway. We can keep it under control.'

‘I promise I will do whatever you tell me to from now on, Liz,' Emma said solemnly. ‘I can't believe it's over,' she went on. ‘I've got so much to do now.'

‘For the wedding?'

‘Oh, yes, of course, but I wasn't talking about that,' said Emma. ‘I know it's only been a week or so, but that's a very long time to have your life flashing before your eyes.'

Blake gave her arm a squeeze.

‘Everything changed. I had no idea what was ahead of me, my whole life was on hold.' She looked at them both. ‘I have so many things buzzing around in my head that I want to do, and now I'm going to get the chance to do them.'

Liz pulled a face. ‘You're not talking about hang-gliding, are you?'

‘No way,' Emma assured her. ‘I'm talking about getting out there and doing something really worthwhile.'

‘Don't forget you only got out of the hospital a couple of days ago,' said Liz. ‘You have to take it easy.'

‘I'll make sure she does,' Blake promised.

‘So when are you going to tell Mum and Dad?' Liz asked them.

Emma hadn't wanted anyone to know when the results were going to be ready, she didn't need the pressure. So Liz had told everyone else Monday, so that Emma would have the entire weekend to come to terms with the news if she needed it.

She glanced at Blake. ‘I think we might go see them right away. What are you doing now?' she said to Liz. ‘Do you want to come with us, we could all go and have lunch afterwards?'

‘To celebrate,' added Blake.

‘I'd love to,' said Liz. ‘But I'm meeting Andrew for lunch.'

Emma nodded. ‘Do you know what you're going to do?'

‘Yeah . . . but I better tell him first.'

‘Wow,' she murmured, leaning forward to hug her again. ‘Call me later, if you want, if you need to talk.'

‘Thanks.'

Liz had arranged to meet Andrew in a café up the road from the hospital, giving them some privacy away from staff and people they might bump into, but not too much privacy. He had suggested meeting tonight instead, at her place, but Liz knew that wasn't a good idea. She still loved him, still found him just as attractive; none of that had changed . . . so if she was going to get through this, they needed to be in a public place.

After they ordered at the counter and found a table, Liz told Andrew about Emma's results.

‘That's great news,' he said. ‘Everyone must be so relieved.'

‘Everyone doesn't know yet,' said Liz. ‘She's off telling them now. You know, it was a horrible thing to go through, and I wouldn't wish it upon anyone, but life and death experiences change people. She's brimming over with all the things she wants to achieve, she and Blake are stronger than ever. The wedding's back on, they were just waiting till after she got the results to set a new date.' She paused. ‘I'll let you know when they do, maybe you'll come?'

He looked uncomfortable. ‘Lizzie, you know I'd love nothing more, but . . .'

‘Yeah, I know.' She gave a resigned sigh.

‘Is that why you wanted to meet,' said Andrew, ‘to put me through some kind of a test?'

Liz shook her head. ‘No. That's not why. I did want to let you know I've applied to join a surgical program.'

He nodded slowly. ‘So you went ahead?'

‘I did.'

‘Where did you apply, here?'

‘No. I put Westmead or St George as my preferences.'

‘Why?'

‘Because near either of those hospitals I can get a house with a yard. A proper yard, not a pocket handkerchief courtyard.'

‘What do you want with a big yard?'

‘It's for the dog.'

‘You don't have a dog.'

‘I will once I have a yard to put one in,' said Liz. ‘Besides, it's time to move out of the area. Mum and Dad have moved now, and who knows where they're going to end up, they certainly don't. Ellen will have to move eventually; Emma and Eddie are both pretty central, and if I get Westmead I'll be closer to Evie.'

‘But not to me.'

‘This is not about you, Andrew,' Liz said plainly. ‘But you know I wouldn't be able to work at the same hospital. I had to try this, I had to at least give it a go. If I am too old and they don't want me, well, I'll have to rethink my options.'

‘You won't continue with dermatology?'

‘I don't think so.'

‘I'm surprised you're still so set against it after what's happened. Surely you see the worth in it now, given you probably just saved your sister's life.'

Liz nodded. ‘That's the thing, that's why I can leave it now. All those years plugging away at something I wasn't really committed to, well, if that put me in the right place at the right time to help Emma, then it's all been worthwhile. And now I can walk away.'

Andrew was listening intently.

‘You see,' she went on, ‘when you invest so much of your life into something, you can get stuck. It doesn't matter if you're not happy or fulfilled any more, it feels like a waste of all those years if you walk away.' She paused. ‘But that's what you have to do if you don't want to waste the rest of your life.'

‘You're not just talking about work, are you?' said Andrew. She could see the defeat in his eyes.

Liz reached over and covered his hand with her own, gazing steadily at him. ‘I can't do it any more, Andrew. I might have given you the best years of my life, but I hope not, I hope there's something better for me ahead. I've been more tied down than if I was married to you. It's time for me to get on with my own life.'

He was staring down at her hand on his, and gradually he lifted his head to look at her. His eyes were glassy. ‘I know it hasn't been fair on you all this time. I hated that I couldn't give you more.' He shook his head. ‘Funny thing is, now the end really is in sight, I reckon maybe only a couple more years.'

Liz sighed. ‘Andrew, do you know how many times I've heard that?'

‘I do, and I'm sorry. But I just couldn't do it to Jen,' he said. ‘Do you know how hard it's been for her? What it would do to her if I . . . ?' He sighed heavily. ‘She's a good person, she doesn't deserve it. I couldn't dump her with all this now.'

‘I'm not asking you to,' said Liz. ‘I wouldn't even want you to. What I want you to realise is that you still love her.'

He hadn't been expecting that. ‘No . . . I mean, yes, in a way, but not the way I love you. I feel compassion for her, but I feel passion for you.'

‘That's not enough,' she said. ‘You need to realise what it means that you've hung in there for your family, and how much they really mean to you. See, I do know how much you love me, Andrew, and I'm sure you know I would have been there for you in a heartbeat. You could have walked away, you could have had it easier, but you stuck with your family. So it's time to give them their due. And their rightful place.'

‘Where are you guys?' Liz covered her other ear, shouting into her phone as she walked along the street away from the café. Someone was tearing up the footpath with a jackhammer opposite, so she could hardly hear. ‘Sorry, can you say that again?'

It turned out that Emma and the others were in a restaurant only about a block away up on King Street. Liz gave up trying to hear anything beyond the name of the place; she hung up and hurried out of the street and away from the jackhammer.

When she arrived at the restaurant, only Ellen and Emma were sitting at a table towards the back, and they waved her over.

‘I didn't know you'd be here,' Liz said, leaning down to give Ellen a kiss.

‘I've put in for long service leave,' she said. ‘The boss said I
should just stay off. The approval is only a formality, and they already have a casual covering for me.'

‘Where's everyone else?' Liz asked as she took a seat.

‘Mum and Dad were about to leave for the bank when Blake and I showed up,' Emma explained. ‘You know they were due to settle on the apartment next week, when they originally planned to be back from Peru? Anyway, they rang the bank to confirm, and they told them the papers were just sitting there, waiting for their signatures. As soon as they sign, they'll hand them the keys. So Blake drove them straight over to the bank, and I waited for Ellen to arrive, said we'd meet up back here.'

‘How much longer do you think they'll be?' said Liz. ‘I could really use a drink.'

‘We're way ahead of you,' Ellen winked at her.

As if on cue, the waiter arrived at their table and popped the bottle for them.

‘Champagne?' Liz remarked.

‘Of course,' said Emma, ‘what else? We are celebrating after all.'

The waiter filled their glasses and left them again.

Liz held up her glass. ‘To you, Emma. What did I say last time we toasted? To a very long life.'

Emma smiled as they clinked glasses and drank.

‘I want to propose a toast to my sisters, not forgetting Evie in her absence,' said Emma. ‘I wouldn't be here without you all.'

‘I think that toast goes to Liz,' said Ellen, clinking glasses with hers.

‘So, tell us,' said Emma, ‘before Mum and Dad get back, how was lunch with Andrew?'

‘That was today?' said Ellen. ‘No wonder you need a drink.'

Liz nodded. ‘But it went all right,' she said. ‘Andrew took it like a grown-up. I think he'd seen it coming for a while now.'

‘What about you?' said Emma.

Liz thought about it. ‘I feel strangely . . . free, I guess. I've been waiting for so long . . . God, I've spent almost a decade waiting. And now the waiting is over. Not the way I'd hoped, but there's definitely a sense of relief.' She took a sip of her champagne and gave her sisters a rueful smile. ‘Okay, we all know I'll probably get
drunk and cry into my wineglass later and wonder what on earth I've done . . . but for the moment I feel free.'

‘Then here's to living in the moment,' said Emma, raising her glass again.

‘I'll drink to that,' said Ellen, following suit. ‘Which, I'll remind you, is what you told me I should do.'

Liz raised an eyebrow. ‘No, that was a completely different context. We wanted you to live in the moment while you were with Finn, not to dump him.'

‘He dumped me.'

‘Because you treated him like crap.'

‘Says who? Have you been talking to him?'

‘No, we never even got to meet him.'

‘Because you hid him away like he was some kind of dirty secret,' added Emma.

‘Why are we talking about Finn again?' Ellen sighed. ‘It's in the past.'

‘Ooh, that's right,' Liz muttered. ‘It was, like, a whole week ago.'

‘Honestly, Ellen,' Emma leaned forward on the table, ‘if you'd been through what I've been through, you might see things differently, and you might not be discarding him so lightly.'

‘Okay, once and for all, I didn't do the discarding, I was the discardee. And on top of that, I need to know, Em, are you going to become slightly unbearable now because you beat this thing?'

‘Yes, I believe I am,' she said with a grin. ‘It's just such an amazing feeling. I don't want to take anything for granted, ever again. And I will not put barriers up to stop myself from doing exactly what I want to do.'

‘Did you ever?'

‘I'm talking about you now, Ellen. Finn sounds like a really nice guy, why are you afraid to let him in?'

Ellen felt something snap inside her. ‘Why does everyone keep saying I'm afraid? Look at Liz, we all think she's brave for finally ending things with Andrew. I think it's a lot braver to be on your own rather than hide behind the safety of a marriage or a relationship. I was with Tim forever, and most of that was so stifling I could hardly breathe. I want to find out who I am before I get sucked into the vortex of another relationship and lose myself.'

‘It doesn't have to be like that, Ellen,' Emma said carefully. ‘Didn't you discover something of yourself being with Finn?'

‘I think it's called the G-spot,' Liz whispered.

Ellen groaned, reaching for the bottle.

‘Oh, come on,' Liz cajoled. ‘I'm only joking around.'

‘Yeah well, the jokes are beginning to wear thin.'

‘Okay, we'll drop it now,' said Emma. ‘We'll support you whatever you do, Ellen, won't we, Liz?'