The Right Time (48 page)

‘You poor thing,' said Liz. ‘You even went to the place for his sake?'

‘Was it totally disgusting?' asked Emma.

‘Pretty much,' she admitted. ‘But I kept well clear of the . . . action, so to speak. I met a nice man, though.'

‘What?' said Liz.

‘Nothing happened,' Evie assured her quickly. ‘He was just a kindred spirit. His wife was into it but he wasn't, so I had someone to talk to.'

‘This is so weird,' muttered Liz.

‘What are you going to do about it, Evie?' said Ellen. ‘I assume Craig has given up on the idea?'

She shrugged. ‘I guess so, but we haven't talked about it. Things are at a stalemate.'

‘What do you want to happen?'

‘I'm not sure.' Evie looked around at her sisters. ‘I don't know how I feel. My whole reason for being has always been to make sure
he
kept loving me, so I put up with anything for the sake of that.'

‘That's not the way it's supposed to be, Ev,' said Emma.

‘I look at my life now,' said Evie, staring at her hands, ‘and who I've become . . . I don't like what I see. I've been a doormat as a wife, and I'm not even a very good mother.'

‘Yes, you are!' Emma insisted.

‘Of course you are!' Liz agreed.

‘You're a wonderful mother,' said Ellen. ‘You're incredibly devoted.'

‘Then why are my kids so awful?' she said bluntly.

Ellen blinked. ‘No they're not. They're just . . . spirited.'

‘Cody's gorgeous,' said Liz.

Evie nodded. ‘He is, he's a sweet boy, for some reason.'

‘Takes after his mother,' said Emma.

‘Thank you,' she said. ‘But Tayla and Jayden, they're so naughty, and defiant, and rude, especially. I don't know what I've done wrong.'

‘Who said it's you?'

‘Like it or not, I'm the parent at home, I'm the one with them all the time,' she said. ‘I can't blame it on Craig.' She took a breath. ‘I think I lost myself somewhere along the way. I thought it was more important to please everyone than to stand up for myself. And look where it's got me.'

‘Well, see, you've figured that much out for yourself,' said Ellen.

Evie turned to her. ‘So what am I supposed to do about it? You're a wonderful mother, Ellen. Your kids are lovely. How did you do it?'

‘Boundaries,' Ellen said automatically.

‘What do you mean?'

She thought about it. ‘You have to set clear boundaries and then stick by them. You can't let the kids dictate to you. They feel secure when they know what's what, and who's in charge.'

‘Perhaps you should listen to your own advice,' Emma muttered.

‘What?' said Ellen.

‘She has a point,' said Liz. ‘You keep saying that your needs come second to the kids.'

‘That's entirely different,' Ellen argued. ‘My kids aren't dictating to me, I'm the one setting the boundaries . . . about what I think is best for them . . . and for all of us,' she added uncertainly. ‘Anyway, we're talking about Evie now.'

‘Boundaries,' Evie murmured thoughtfully. ‘I don't know, isn't it a bit late?'

‘Of course not, they're ten and eight, they're not exactly hardened criminals,' said Liz.

That made Evie smile.

‘Look!' Emma declared. ‘She's smiling again.'

‘Smiling at what?'

They all turned to see Eddie walk into the room.

‘Eddie!' they chorused.

‘Greetings, my adoring fans,' he replied, holding his arms out towards them.

‘Oh, get over yourself,' said Emma as he came over to give her a kiss on the top of her head.

‘How's the patient?' he asked.

Emma looked around at her sisters. ‘All the better for the company I'm keeping,' she declared.

‘Looks like you've formed a coven here,' he said. ‘Is it safe for a man to break the circle?'

‘No, but you're just a boy,' Liz grinned. ‘You'll be all right.'

Eddie shook his head and smiled, perching on the arm of Liz's chair. ‘So when are they going to let you out of here, Em?'

‘In a day or two, apparently.'

‘And then what? Will you have to have more treatment?'

Emma looked at Liz. ‘Ask the doctor.'

‘Well,' Liz began carefully, ‘they might know something in a couple of days, but the full pathology report will take about a week.'

‘And?' Eddie prompted her.

‘Hopefully it will show no spread to the lymph nodes and she won't need any further treatment right now. We'll just have to
keep a close eye on her after that, regular follow-ups, that kind of thing.'

Eddie frowned. ‘And if there is cancer in the lymph nodes?'

‘They'll take them out,' Liz said, making it sound simple. ‘And there's various options after that – they might prescribe ray treatment, for example.' She didn't want to say more now. Because if cancerous lymph nodes were found, that would be a fairly strong indication it had spread further, and Liz didn't even want to entertain that idea. It was better for everyone to stay positive.

‘Okay, well I for one have got big plans for you, Emma, when this is all over,' said Eddie.

She looked at him, waiting.

‘I am going to take you for a tandem glide.'

She groaned along with her sisters.

‘I'm not going to take no for an answer,' he maintained. ‘In fact, I'm determined to talk you all into it.'

‘You can talk till you're blue in the face,' said Liz.

Evie was shaking her head. ‘Not going to happen, Ed.'

‘I already told you no way,' added Ellen.

‘Oh, you're all such fraidy cats,' Eddie dismissed. ‘What do I keep telling you? You have to face your fears. It'll make you stronger.'

The girls exchanged a knowing smile between them.

‘What's going on?' he said.

‘You have no idea, little brother,' said Emma. She winced as she propped herself up on her elbows. ‘In this room right now are four of the strongest women you're ever likely to come across.'

‘Oh yeah?' he said dubiously.

‘Oh yeah,' she nodded. ‘Look around you. I'm not going to give away names, but between us, we're fighting cancer, saving lives, raising kids, dumping men and being dumped by men, visiting swingers' clubs, and having a great deal of very hot sex.'

Eddie was gobsmacked. And clearly uncomfortable.

‘Whereas you, little brother,' Emma went on, ‘are too frightened to even introduce us to your girlfriend. From where I sit, or should I say lie, I don't think this hang-gliding caper is making you very brave at all.'

Emma noticed Liz glance at her watch again.

‘You know,' she said, ‘if you have to be somewhere, Liz, it's fine. Same goes for all of you,' she added, looking at Evie and Ellen. ‘Mum and Dad will be here soon anyway. You really don't have to keep up the constant vigil.'

She was sitting up today. With the pillows propped behind her in a particular arrangement Emma found she could be quite comfortable, for short periods at least.

‘I've got nowhere I have to be,' said Ellen, flipping through a magazine from the stack that had been brought over from Emma's place. ‘I have to admit, I'm kind of enjoying taking a break from school,' she added. ‘In fact, I'm thinking of making it more permanent.'

‘What, you're going to quit?' Evie asked her.

‘Hey, I never asked,' said Emma. ‘Did you hear from the private school?'

Ellen nodded. ‘I didn't get the job.'

‘You applied for a job at a private school?' said Evie, wide-eyed. ‘Did Mum and Dad know about that?'

‘No, they didn't, and now they don't have to,' she warned. ‘Anyway, I think it was for the best, I'm actually feeling a little burnt out. Maybe I need a break.'

‘What will you do?' asked Liz.

‘I have no idea. But I have some long service leave owing. I might take some time off to figure it out.'

‘Hm,' Evie mused. ‘I'm starting to think I need to get a job, but I don't know who would employ me.'

‘Don't be so hard on yourself,' said Ellen. ‘You might not have worked for a while, Evie, but your qualifications are still good.'

‘Yeah, in childcare,' she said. ‘But I think I've had enough of that. It might be time for a change.'

‘I know how you feel,' Liz muttered.

There was a knock on the door. It was chocked halfway open, and they all looked around as Blake stepped out from behind the door.

Emma's heart dropped into her stomach. ‘What are you doing here?' she managed to say.

He looked uncharacteristically nervous. Emma had rarely ever seen him nervous. He was one of the most unflappable people she knew.

‘I . . . ah . . . I wanted to see you,' he said. ‘I was hoping we could talk.'

Her heart was beating so hard it was throbbing in her ears, and her legs felt twitchy. Part of her wanted to hear what he had to say for himself, but the other part didn't want to give him the time of day. And she felt angry just looking at him; but on the other hand, she was so glad to see his face . . . Emma had so many conflicting emotions running through her she couldn't think straight.

‘Okay,' she said finally. ‘Go ahead, what do you want to say?'

Blake glanced across at her sisters, all lined up in a row on the other side of the bed, like a guard of honour.

‘Um, do you think . . .?' he said. ‘Well, do you think I could see you on your own?'

‘No,' all four of them said as one.

‘Anything you have to say to me,' said Emma, regaining at least some of her composure, ‘you can say in front of my sisters.'

‘Oh, okay then,' he said. He took a couple of tentative steps into the room. ‘How are you feeling?' he began.

Emma sighed. ‘It's a bit late in the day to be acting concerned, Blake.'

‘I never stopped being concerned,' he said sincerely. ‘I know you probably find that hard to understand.'

‘To say the least.'

He took a breath, and another step closer. ‘I'm so sorry, Em, so sorry for hurting you, but I'm not sorry that I did what I did. It was the only way.'

She frowned. ‘What's that supposed to mean?'

‘If I didn't walk out, you would never have gone ahead with the tests, or the treatment. You would have stuck to your guns about the wedding, kept making excuses. I know you too well.'

‘Oh come on, Blake,' she said, ‘be honest. You were looking for a way to get out of the wedding. And you got it. It's all off now,
Evie's cancelled everything. But don't think for a minute you're going to get out of paying your share.'

‘I don't care about that, I don't care what it costs.'

‘That's all you cared about.'

‘No, Emma, all I cared about was you getting well,' he said, his voice becoming more insistent. ‘It's true, the wedding was getting out of hand, and no, it didn't matter to me the way it mattered to you.' He paused. ‘But it paled into . . . into such utter insignificance compared to the thought of anything happening to you.'

Emma just stared at him.

‘The only thing I could do was to walk out on you,' he went on. ‘You should have heard yourself – you were being so stubborn, so irrational, you just weren't making any sense.'

She glanced at her sisters. They all looked sheepish, avoiding her gaze.

‘I didn't know what else to do,' said Blake.

‘Well, you didn't have to do that,' she said. ‘Do you have any idea how much you hurt me?'

Blake sighed heavily. ‘I do, and I'm sorry, but I was prepared to piss you off forever,' he said, ‘even if you never wanted to have anything to do with me again. That was preferable to . . .' His voice faltered then. He cleared his throat. ‘I just couldn't go through with the wedding, Emma, and I could never have gone away for weeks on a honeymoon, knowing that every day . . . So I left. It was the hardest thing I've ever done because I was so worried about you, but I knew it was the only way.'

Emma was trying to steel herself. She couldn't forget how she had felt the night he walked out. Every doubt she'd ever had over all their years together had come to the surface, and for the first time in her life she'd understood why they called it being heart-broken. Her heart had broken. And she didn't know if she could get past that.

‘If you cared so much,' she said eventually, ‘if you were so worried, why didn't you call, or check how I was?'

He glanced at Liz. ‘I've been in touch with Liz several times a day most days.'

They all looked at her, and she nodded.

‘Why didn't you tell me, Liz?' Emma said.

‘I asked her not to,' Blake answered for her. ‘Not until you'd had whatever treatment you needed to have. So there was absolutely no chance you'd back out and not go through with it.'