The Journey (13 page)

“Is that so?” He smiled. “You are even stranger than I realized. Most people like to watch the sun set and the moon rise.”

“Oh, don’t get me wrong. You’d be hard pressed to find anything more beautiful than an autumn sunset in the Smokey’s. But still… dusk—it makes me uneasy.”

“I know why,” he whispered.

“Know why what? Why I get goosebumps at twilight?”

“Yes.”

I smiled then. “Do tell, Angel. Please, enlighten me as to why my skin crawls and my spine tingles, just after sunset.”

“Because,
smarty
pants
, that’s when the veil between worlds is pushed back. It is only for a few moments. That tiny span of time—just after the sun hides but the sky has not yet darkened. During that tiny blip of the day… our realms blend for a heartbeat. Then, we are separate once more.”

I sat there, just staring at him. “So…
that’s
what it is,” I whispered, mostly to myself.

“Yes, little one. Many unknown things can and do happen within that tiny breath of time. Do yourself a favor—and me as well—do not cross into the Nether during dusk. It is only a slight possibility, yes, but it only lasts for a moment. Why take the chance?”

“Chance of what? What possibility?”

“Just listen to me. Do not cross over while the veil is down. And
that
is my gift to you.”

I matched his poignant gaze, then slowly nodded my understanding… even though I didn’t really have a clue. But I would definitely heed his warning—understood or not.

“Now then. Come. Fill your amulet and let your amazing new journey begin.”

I smiled when he did. How could I not? Although feeble and ancient, his smile was as captivating a thing as I had ever seen.

“You must have been truly amazing, Azazel. I mean… before—”

“Before all this?”

He glanced down at the binding rocks as he spoke. I only nodded.

“Yes. I guess I was.” He squeezed my hand again and I met his gaze. “You would have been as willing clay within my skilled hands.”

“Yeah, right.” I rolled my eyes. “The other way around, I’d say. You would have been all like…
Jem, my love, why do you toy with my heart so?
”

He growled at my mimicking tone. I only laughed.

He sighed then and looked down at my hand upon his chest. “You are not far from the truth of it, I fear.”

“Oh, please. You know that’s a load of bull, same as I do.”

“Perhaps. Perhaps not.” The corner of his mouth turned up in a smirk. “Had I met you before this Drella person, you would have been mine… and happy in the chains that bound you to me.”

“Umm… Should’a, could’a, would’a—didn’t. Enough with all the things that never were and never will be. My
sparkle
would have gone out, just like everyone else’s, then you would have tired of me. Besides, we met when we were supposed to meet. And… I’m happy that we did.”

“As am I.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle then. “Ahh… Who would have ever guessed? If the absurd thought had ever even crossed my mind that one day I’d be having a playful chat with the great Azazel, people would have said I was a total nutter—an absolute lunatic, beyond hope.”

He smiled. “And if they could see you now?”

“Then they wouldn’t just
think
I was an odd bird. They’d know the truth of it.”

“The Great Azazel, huh? I kind of like the sound of that. Tell me. Is there anything about me you have yet to read, but wish to know?”

“Duh. Only about a gazillion things.”

“Truly? Name one and I shall answer it.”

“Seriously? Are you just pulling my leg?”

He only looked at me, quizzically.

“I mean, no matter what I ask… you’ll answer it?”

“If I know the answer, you shall have it. Seek and ye shall find. Ask and it shall be given.”

“Hmm… Well, I’ve always been curious about the dynamics of your mating.”

“My what?”

“Wait. I didn’t mean that all pervy, like it sounded. I only meant that, well… you
are
an Angel. Being such, your offspring would have been Nephilim, correct?”

“…Yes. Why is that curious to you?”

“Azazel, you are the father of
giants
. And I don’t just mean fairytale giants—real ones…
giants
.”

“So?”

“So… how did a human woman give birth to a giant? Were the Nephilim just born normal sized and then grew super big? Or were they giant babies? Did it kill her? —the mother. Did it tear her apart? I had this friend who used to breed show cows. Yeah, I know. Don’t even ask. Anyway, he bought the biggest, best, most award-winning Charolais bull in the whole world. But when he bred it with the biggest and best Charolais cows, the calves were so big they killed the mamas during birth. It was financially disastrous—spending thousands of dollars on a cow, only to lose it during the birthing process.”

“And how did he solve such an expensive problem?”

“Well, I know this sounds awful, but… he bought a bunch of
field
cows
. You know—cows that just cost like three or four hundred bucks. Then he hired a veterinarian. The Vet would take eggs from the Charolais cows, sperm from that enormous bull, and then artificially inseminate the fertilized egg into the plain old field cows.”

“Ingenious.”

“Yeah, I guess. Great for the Charolais—sucked for the regular cows. They were basically living incubators for the pricier, higher-classed cow.”

“So… their lives were given to the betterment of a superior race of cow.”

“Well, I guess that’s
one
way to look at it,” I grumbled. “There are many opposing views as well—arguments that we’ll not get into right now. But… that whole thing always made me sooo curious.”

“Breeding giant cows?”

“No, silly. Breeding giant people. Did Angels use women as just living incubators for, as
you
said, the betterment of a superior race? I mean… unless there are girl Angels—”

“There are not. And just how would that work, Jem? If I had a child with another Angel, the babe would be Angel. Not a mix blood.”

“…Yeah. I guess you’re right. So… how did it work with human women?”

His eyes sparkled again. “Shall I show you?”

“Eewww… nooo… duh.”

He laughed then. “Fear not. Such a thing is no longer possible.”

We both glanced down at the large stones and fell silent for a time.

He gently tugged on my ponytail. “Are you yet pure, Jem? Have you not experienced what it’s like to be with a man?”

I nervously cleared my throat. “No! I’m not still pure.” My voice cracked then. “Jeez, Angel. What kind of question is that? Just because I’ve never felt about another man the way I felt about Drell, doesn’t mean I quit dating entirely—even married… a
few
times.” I swallowed hard. My cheeks felt like they would burst into flames at any moment. “I know how the sex part works. Well, maybe not with an Angel.”

“It works the same.”

“Ugh! Stop.” I held up my hands. “I don’t care to hear about that. That’s not even the part I was curious about. Jeez…”

He chuckled softly. “If you are so
experienced
, why are you stammering and fidgeting and sweating?”

“Shut up,” I barely mumbled, turning away from him.

Azazel gently tugged on my ponytail again. “Hey… Jem… Do you truly wish to know the answer?”

“I did.” I glanced back towards him. “I guess a tiny piece of me still does. But, no. No, I do not truly wish to know. Not anymore. Some things are probably better left to the imagination, I suppose.”

“Yes… I suppose.”

When I just sat there—silent, still blushing, lost in my own thoughts—Azazel softly cleared his throat.

“We have put off the inevitable long enough. Do you not agree?”

When I didn’t answer, he paused a moment before going on.

“Lovely Witness.” He gently touched my back. “Have you forgotten about the man who is yet waiting for you?”

“The what?”

“The man who brought you here. I heard him say that he would be waiting for you… right there.”

“Oh crap… Drella.” I immediately started fumbling around with my things. “Crap. Crap. Crap. He’s gonna be sooo pissed.”

I stopped fumbling and took a deep breath, trying to steady my hands
and
my nerves.

“Is this the same Drella who left you?” Azazel softly whispered. “The Drella who died? The one you loved above all other men?”

Tears burned the backs of my eyes when I turned to face the Angel. “…Yes. The same.”

He tenderly stroked my cheek then. “How very painful for you, little Jem. So close, yet—”

“Yes. I know.” I cleared my throat. “Okay, Gramps. You ready? Tell me if I hurt you.”

I heard him suck air in through his teeth as my thumbnail pierced his flesh.

It was nothing like I had imagined. I believed I would have to
jab
through his crinkled, rough hide. Nothing could have been further from the truth. When my strangely-imbued thumbnail but
touched
his ancient skin, it was like sinking a knife into warm butter—easy in, easy out. The underneath of my nail held the single drop of blood needed to fill the small stone on my amulet. Nothing oozed forth from the wound. Not even a tiny bit was wasted.

I hurriedly picked up the circular pink bandage and gently covered the tiny half-moon cut I had left him with.

“See?” He lightly touched the bandage, smiling. “All that fretting over such a tiny thing.”

“But… you lied to me.”

He looked up, a furrow now forming between his brows. “I did no such thing. How did I lie?”

“You said it wouldn’t hurt.”

“And it did not.”

“Don’t lie. I heard you suck in your breath when I first stuck you.”

He smiled. “That wasn’t a lie… and it wasn’t from pain, either. That tiny noise was merely the audible proof of my internal ecstasy.”

I rolled my eyes and looked away. I think I was blushing again. He laughed.

“Okay then. I better get going before I get into even
more
trouble.”

I removed the lid from my water bottle and tore open the wrapper on a new Hershey bar. “I’m just gonna leave this right here.”

“It is not necessary.”

“Necessary or not, I’m leaving it.”

Azazel only smiled in resignation at the stern look I gave him. “Very well. Do as you wish.”

“Thanks, Gramps.”

“Why do you keep calling me Gramps?” he mumbled before pinching my side, pretty hard, actually.

“Ouch. Stop it.” I slapped at his withered hand. “I’m gonna leave the candle burning as well.
If
you don’t mind. It’s not got a whole lot longer to go anyway. Do you want me to light another one?”

“
That
one will be plenty.”

“Okay, let’s see… I’ve already opened the water and chocolate… I put your bandage on… filled the blood stone…”

“There is nothing more to keep you here, Jem. Quit stalling.”

“I know. Ugh… I’m being ridiculous. You’ll be fine. You were fine before me, you’ll be fine after.” I slapped my hands down on my thighs and started to stand. “I’ll be back soon. Okay?” Without thinking, I leaned over and kissed his crumbling cheek. “Stay outta trouble. You hear me?”

“And you as well.”

He grabbed my arm when I moved to stand.

“Jem?”

“Yes?”

“Next time… come alone.”

I smiled. “I don’t think I’ll have a choice. This whole
escorting
thing—one-time deal, I believe.”

“Good.”

We smiled at each other, but he didn’t let go. I didn’t object, only waited until he was ready for me to leave. When his grip slowly loosened, I patted his hand and turned back towards the inclined corridor.

Chapter

4

“What
took
you so long?”

I let out a screech when Drella stepped from the shadows and grabbed my arm.

“Holy hell, Drell,” I said through a pant, clutching my chest. “You nearly scared the life right outta me. Jeez.”

The ground suddenly began to quake beneath our feet. An eerie, unearthly sound rumbled up the darkened passageway. I covered my ears, wincing.

“What in the—”

“It’s
him
,” Drella said coolly.

“Him? Who him?”

He rolled his eyes. “The Angel.
Who
him
did you think?”

“The Angel? Azazel?”

Drella only gave me a level glare.

“That didn’t
sound
like him. It sounded more like a beast… something dreamed up in nightmares.”

“It is.
He
is.” Drella jerked me by the arm and turned me back towards the darkness. “Tell him you’re fine.”

“Wh-what?”

“Tell him.”

“But…”

I took a step forward, but Drella quickly pulled me back to him.

“He can hear you just fine from here. Now, tell him.”

I looked back and forth, from Drella’s angry eyes to the thick blackness further down the tunnel. I was stunned… until that Otherworldly growl rumbled around us again.

“Tell him!”

“I-I’m fine, Azazel. I just got scared. That’s all. No worries. Okay?”

“…Jem…”

The whisper could have only been in my mind. I thought it was, until Drella grunted out his disgust. I knew then, he had heard it as well. He turned to go. I chased after him.

“Not big on following rules, huh?”

I didn’t answer.

“I want to ask. You have no
idea
how badly I want to ask. But the words that might spill from your lips… I dare not know the truth of it.”

“I didn’t do anything wrong,” I mumbled under my breath.

He spun back to face me. “Didn’t do any—” He glanced back over my shoulder toward the darkened tunnel. “Come on. Now.”

“…Drella…”

That second whisper froze me in my tracks. I cringed. Drella’s back stiffened.

“You told him about me.”

It wasn’t a question. More like an accusation.

“S-sorry,” I whispered. “I didn’t
mean
to. It just… slipped out.”

He grabbed my hand, dragging me towards the exit.

“…Farewell… sweet Jem…”

I smiled to myself. “Later, Gramps!” I called out over my shoulder just as I was violently jerked out into the blinding light of day.

Drella released my hand and stomped off, grumbling under his breath. I kept a safe distance until we were a good three hundred yards or so from the hidden cavern entrance on the side of that desolate mountain.

“Drell? You still pissed?”

He spun back towards me, stomping right up to meet me. He was grinding his teeth. I could hear them. His fists were shaking at his sides. I didn’t look up to meet his gaze.

We stood like that for what felt like forever, before Drella released a long sigh and then wrapped his arms around me.

“Oh, Ladybug, what am I gonna
do
with you? Pooh… why didn’t you listen to me?”

I didn’t answer, only balled his shirt up in my fists and held him ever closer.

“The rules are not meant to protect
him
, my love. They are meant to protect
you
. You’re the only one who matters.
He
is of no consequence. He serves a purpose. That is all.”

“But… but that seems so cruel,” I mumbled into his chest. “He was so pitiful—lying there in the dirt, rocks covering three-fourths of his body, his skin all crumbly, face drawn, eyes vacant.” I shivered. “Tell me, Drella. How am I supposed to just stab him and walk away? I couldn’t do that. Not to an animal. Not to a man. And not to an Angel… even a fallen one.”

“…Pooh.” He squeezed me tighter.

“If I was meant to hate him, he should have been presented to me whole and beautiful and full of fire. Had I seen him standing there in the dark like
that
, it would have been easy to hate him, easy to blame him for all the harm he brought into this world. But lying there… like
that
—all broken and miserable and resigned.” I swallowed down the lump rising up in my throat. “I couldn’t, Drell. I just… couldn’t.”

“I know, Pooh,” he whispered. “I know. That’s one of the reasons I love you like I do.”

He kissed the top of my head and finally released me.

“But… if you already knew that… why did you get so mad at me? If I only did what you already knew I couldn’t help but do, why such anger?”

He sighed. “That wasn’t anger, Pooh. It was jealousy.”

I snickered. “Jealousy? Of a bound Angel that cannot leave his darkened prison cell?”

“Don’t laugh. Shoe on the other foot, Jem. Shoe on the other foot.”

I sort of growled then. “You better never.”

“Oh, I won’t. But apparently it’s okay if
you
do.”

“Ah, Drell. It’s not like that. Have you ever seen him?”

“I have not.”

“Well, he’s all… I don’t know—mummified or petrified or something. It’s the most pitiful thing you’ve ever seen. Apparently everyone before me just came in, felt through the dark, sliced him open, and then just left.”

“That’s what
you
were supposed to do as well.”

“He’s
covered
in scars, Drell. Covered. I can’t even describe it properly. There’s only his head, chest, and one arm even visible. The rest of him is covered in these giant rocks. Rocks so big I couldn’t even see their tops. And he’s just lying there… covered in literally
hundreds
of knife wounds.”

“It’s his own fault.”

“I
know
that. I just… just couldn’t add to the harm. That’s all.” I sighed, rubbing the sweat from my brow. “We talked a little. Nothing important. Nothing world-altering. I rubbed some lotion on his arm because I was afraid to cut him otherwise. I clipped his nails, gave him some chocolate, and then put a bandage over the spot I drew blood.”

Drella furrowed his brow. “Why on Earth did you give him chocolate?”

“My sugar started to drop. Nerves, I guess. I couldn’t eat something and not at least
offer
him some.”

“Your sugar dropped? Pooh, I
told
you you needed more than just an apple.”

“I’m fine. Don’t worry. But… I could definitely go for some ramen right about now.”

“Good. Let’s go get something to eat.”

He dropped his arm over my shoulders, leading me further away from the mountain.

“So… this
bandage
…”

“Yeah?”

I glanced up at him. Drella was smiling with only one corner of his mouth.

“Was it the little pink pony ones you always used to keep?”

“Yeah. Why?”

His smile grew. “Nothing. Pffts… I bet he looked sooo cute.”

I playfully punched him. Then we
both
laughed.

*****

“I like the way you travel, Drell.”

I leaned back in my chair, stretching my arms.

“Ready for a nap?”

I glanced at him, smiling. “How’d you know?”

“You ate way too many carbs. Let’s go for a walk before we call it a day.”

“Sounds good. I’ve never been to Oharaimachi before. I’d love to have a look around, do a bit of shopping.”

“No shopping today, Pooh. Don’t worry. You’ll be back through here before long. In truth, you’ll probably see this place so much, you’ll get sick of it.”

“Sick of it? No way. An old Edo Period place like this? I could find a
million
things to ask questions about. Look at these buildings. It’s like we stepped back in time five hundred years.”

“About
four
hundred, no kidding.”

“It’s breathtaking.”

“Yeah, it sure is.”

I took his hand and pulled him right against me. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and kissed the side of my head.

“Hey, Pooh… you ever dream we’d be walking around in a place like this?”

“From Harrogate, Tennessee to Ise-Shima, Japan? Umm… Nope. Never.”

“I’m glad I’m seeing it with you, Pooh.”

His whisper tickled my ear. I giggled.

“I’m glad I’m seeing it with you, too, Drell. I love you.”

“Love me more than Azazel?”

“Well… I’m not sure how much Azazel loves you, but I’m
pretty
sure I could top it.”

He yanked on my hair. “Smarty pants. You know what I meant.”

“I don’t
love
Azazel. I felt sorry for him. That’s all.”

“Well… he
loves
you.”

“You’re insane.”

“No.
He’s
insane. You’d do well not to forget that, Ladybug.”

“I merely showed him a bit of kindness. What harm could it bring?”

“Perhaps… more than you know.”

“And perhaps not.”

“True.” He hugged me closer. “Just keep your guard up. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Promise?”

“Yeah, I promise.”

“Good. Now, for why we’re here.”

“You mean… this
isn’t
a jolly holiday?”

“It wasn’t meant to be, no, but we can make it what we want.”

He kissed the side of my head again. I smiled so big my cheeks hurt.

“I brought you here to show you the gateway.”

“The gateway to where?”

“To the beyond. When you meditate and try, you can reach the Nether from anywhere. And as long as you hang on to that pendant there…” He flipped it as he spoke. “…you can pop back out anywhere. But if you ever need to use the bridge, you can.”

“The bridge?”

“Yeah. It’s where we’re headed now.”

“I don’t understand. Are you saying… if I can’t meditate, I should fly all the way to Japan?”

“In case of emergency, yeah. Or…”

When he didn’t go on, I looked up just in time to watch the blush spread across his cheeks. I stopped, forcing him to stop as well.

“Drella… what are you trying to hide from me?”

“I’m not trying to hide anything. I only wanted to show you the way to… me.
If
you ever needed me and I wasn’t there. You know. Just in case.”

He looked like a little boy—blushing, fidgeting, looking away. He was sooo cute. I kissed him. I couldn’t help it. His gorgeous eyes lit up like stars.

“Thanks, Drella. If there was only one gateway open to me, I’d want it to be the one that led me straight to you.”

He
kissed
me
then. I almost fainted. Yeah, he makes me feel
that
way—the only one who ever has, ever could.

“I wish you didn’t have to go back to him.” He wrapped me up in his arms. “I wish there was another way to fuel the key. It’s not just the jealousy talking. I don’t trust him, Pooh.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you before. I should have nev—”

“If you hadn’t done exactly what you did… you wouldn’t be the little Pooh Bear I love so much.”

“Drell…”

“Come on, Ladybug. We’ve got a ways yet to go.”

*****

The bridge was long, arched, wooden, and completely ancient… mythical looking.

“Oh, Drella. It’s… beautiful.”

“I knew you’d like it.” He chuckled. “You were always fascinated with the strangest things. But I can’t take credit for
this
.” He motioned towards the magical-looking old bridge. “It serves as the main gateway to
me
, yes, but it’s actually the bridge to the Ise Shrines—Shinto’s most sacred shrines.”

“Shinto Shrines? Drella… are you a Kami?”

“No, silly. I’m not one of their gods. I’m a Seeker. Remember? And I was Christian, not Shinto. But this bridge
does
lead to the shrine of Amaterasu, the Sun Goddess.”

“Their most sacred Kami.”

“Yes.” He smiled. “You know a lot about religion, don’t you?
All
kinds of religion.”