THE GATE KEEPER (4 page)

Michael
was on time. He switches off the engine and the double main light. He removes
his helmet and leaves it lock on the motor bike. He gets off the bike and head
towards the mobile crowd of students at the main door. He force and bump his
way through them. He didn’t want to talk to anyone nor get a chance to know
them.

The
superficial teenager felt no need to spare his time of befriending anybody. He
felt too good about himself. He was reaching the end of college and he was
among the smartest kids in the school. Deep down, he felt physically as good as
his academic skills. He would work hard for it, through endless of sleepless
night, weeks before every tests and exams.

As
he walks through the crowd of students inside the college he sees Phil. He
stops and stares at him. At that point he realise that he had made an
exception. He had to break his own principles. He hated himself for doing so
but it had to be done.

His
nemesis was a competent adversary. The sole obstacle that could has prevented
his vision of a successive future. His desire to be the best had been motivated
by his own tailor-made and disciplinary core values. Winning had always been
his ultimate goal. He thought of himself as the fittest survivor. He had felt
disgusted with himself lately.   

He
walks with the flow of the crowd. Phil open his locker and Michael wait for
him. He quietly rests his back against the other lockers nearby. Michael
ignores the crowd passing by, turn and stare at Phil.

I
put my small day sack in my locker which was in front of me. I felt lucky
enough to have been given one which was the right height for me. I close the
locker after I was done. At the corner of my right eye I could see a blurry
image of somebody I could not yet recognise.

‘You’re
not going to run away from the trial are you?’ The teenage voice of a boy said.

It
made me feel quite jumpy but I hide my emotion. It felt creepy as he was
sneaking without warning.

‘
Jes
… men, are you sneaking on me?’ I asked.

‘I
wouldn’t if I knew that you’re not going to turn out with cold leg for the
trial.’

I
lock the locker and respond sarcastically, ‘I shall definitely be there but
don’t turn up with a heavy leg.’

‘Today
we’ll definitely know who’s the fastest.’ Michael said.

I
walk towards the same way I came in for my class. He follows and I respond,
‘It’s not going to be about speed, it’s a one thousand metres race and it’s all
about endurance. The question you should ask yourself Michael, is if you will
be able to cope with the pace at a long period of time?’

He
rushes in front of me that I had to stop. He looks at me deep in my eyes and
gives me a psychopathic face. Suddenly he point a finger at his temple and said
in an upsetting voice, ‘It’s all in the head Phil.’

‘Relax
man… just don’t take it too personal, after all it’s just a game.’

He
walks away and said ‘May the best sport man win. See you at PE then.’ 

For
a moment I wonder what has happened that he had to take everything so personal.
Michael and I have known each other since we were kids but it’s only recently
that we’ve become closer. A friendship which I could not fully comprehend as
for him it all felt as if he was competing with the whole world.

‘Yes
at PE then,’ I replied.

I
made a left turn for the closest class nearby and went for my early class which
was Geography. I walk in and sit in my normal chair at the back of the middle
row. A young pretty and blond female walks in. She walks towards me, smile at
me and I return the gesture. She sits in front of me in the usual empty chair.

Each
class we all attend we had to sit in our allocated sit given by our teacher. It
was how the teachers manage to remember our names. The empty chair and desk was
taken for the first time after being emptied for months. The new girl nervously
jolts both thigh and legs while awaiting for an introduction with Miss Harper,
our Geography teacher.

She
was a stunner. I wanted to get to know her but her beauty made me felt
speechless. Not just that she was gorgeous but because I felt that she was too
pretty for me. She turns around. She gives me a flush look and produces a
smile.

The
sign was there, come on say something… Just talk to her,
my
effusive conscience challenged. Inside I could no longer tolerate the childish
shyness that had enslaved me in my own cocoon shell for so long.
I had to
come out of it
.
I have been hiding for too long
. After a devastated
humiliation which I received in front of the class from Hailey a few years back
I had shut my world down. 

Speaking
to the opposite sex has not been easy. Hailey had knock off my audacious
confidence since the occurrence of that event. The existing phobia had taken
over my life drastically. It was really harsh of her and I still had bad dreams
about it. I could see most of them in convulsions of laughter. Some of them
their face burst with overwhelm joy. For them I was a farce and making a
mockery out of me was easy. They made me aware that she was out of my league.
And I wasn’t meant for her. A loser and a geek was how she had portrayed me to
the class.

I’ve
learned to accept the truth of reality, the hard way. This material world was
all about the presentation. The way you portray yourself and look was one of
them. As time pass by I realised that it wasn’t totally their fault. It’s what
the media and adverts psychologically triggers them how to think unconsciously.
For them I was in a dream world.

The
obese boy they once knew took a look at him in the mirror grew up and change.
Miraculously he managed to sort himself out. For years I had proved all of them
wrong.
I need to know her, I have to talk to her or I’m
gonna
miss a chance of a lifetime which I may regret,
I thought
.

‘Hi,
I’m Phil.’

She
turns around and said, ‘Hi, Samantha Burk.’

‘Wow.’

‘What?’
Samantha asked as she smiles.

‘For
a minute I thought you wouldn’t talk to a guy like me.’ I said nervously.

‘What
do you mean?’

‘I
mean you’re, you’re….’ I faltered.

She
nods in respond, ‘yes?’

‘Hot
and irresistible are the right words.’

‘Wow….,
that was quick. I didn’t expect that on a first day at school.’

‘Well….,
you got a fan.’ I said as I smile. She smile back and I respond, ‘Maybe, you
could spare out some of your free time to your fan some of these coming few
days….when…’

There
was a silence as we stare into each other’s eyes. I finally found the fortitude
to execute my last sentence, ‘you’re not too busy.’

Samantha
produces an amazing friendly and jovial smile which set my heart on fire. Then
she joyfully says, ‘do not push your luck.’

‘Is
that a yes?’

She
turns in front and said, ‘I’ll think about it.’

My
face was filled with joy and happiness as I knew I had caught a fish. All I
have to do is to be patient.

Normal
adrenaline of fear rushes through my veins as I laid one knee to the ground.
Unusual nervousness of losing my pride kept me from losing hope. Six other athletes
rest in the same positions and waiting for the sound of our coach’s gun. This
was it, the best of the athletes from the college chosen to compete against
each other so that the best of the best may represent the school for the final.

Most
of the athletes waited for their turn by watching the events they were not in.
Non-athletes like Samantha who wanted to watch it sat under the grand stand.
Others choose to record the events on their mobile and send it to those in the
classrooms.

One
lap of the stadium was what we had to do for the trial. Best effort was what
our coach was after. He blow the whistle and we all extend our kneeling leg
into a straight position at a forty five angle from the red running turf while
our hands  give support to our upper body.  I turn my head and face
Michael on my far left. We were both far apart but he was staring at me. I was
under the impression that he have been waiting for me to look at him.

He
sarcastically smiles at me, wink and quickly face forward. Then a sound of
command we were waiting for came through the barrel of a small gun which was
shot in the air. We all got off our hands with immense power from the help of
our proper leg postures stuck with the metals attached to the track.

We
all start with the same, fast and vigorous flow of movements. I try to build up
my momentum through a strategy method of conserving my energy. Behind me was a
thin keen young marathon runner. Ahead of me were four good runners with
Michael as the second leading runner. The first man was the muscly bully, Tony.
Convinced he can win it he burns himself to the limit by speeding at the first
turn.

We
all followed as if we were trying to catch him. I open my legs a bit while I
control my breathing. Half way Michael overtook him and builds an unstoppable
strategy. At that point I knew that I had to take control. Losing was not an
option. I knew what I needed to do,
Increase and step up the pace to get a
grip of the speedy Michael or leave too much gap that would become impossible
to overcome.

The
human train was at its height of speed. I run with the flow as if I was a back
wagon being pulled. I open up my legs and increase the speed a bit more. It
felt as if my legs were not touching the ground. I overtook the fifth man who
displayed an emotion of fatigue on his face. Then I was closer to the fourth
man who was half a metre away. This one, his breathing was all over the place.
Soon he shows sign of surrendering his position in my favour.

Ahead
Michael led the way but I have to go through the third and second man. I inhale
deep breath and exhale at a similar controllable rate.  It had to be done
to prevent early exhaustion. The human wagons scatters all over the place as we
made the last turn for the last few metres to the finish line. Michael was
approximately three hundred metres away.

This
was the point I knew would separate men from boys and winners to losers. I give
my ultimate best by opening and moving my legs faster than I had done before.
Sprinting I overtook the third man who was gasping for air due of exhaustion.

Further
challenge occurs as I pass the second man who seems fit enough to cope with my
speed. A metre away was Michael and sixty metres away from him was the finish
line. Loud noise of applauds and cheering came from the non-participants. Some
were clapping their hands.

‘Michael!
Michael
!,
Michael!...’ Michael’s fans’ applauds.

‘Kevin!
Don’t give up!’ A crowd nearby shout and applaud at my nearest competitor.

‘Phil!
Phil!’ It was a recognise voice but I made a quick glance at the corner of my
eyes to confirm what I heard.  It was the beautiful Samantha in person who
was cheering and waving at me.

‘Come
on Phil!!! You can win it!’ She screams at the top of her voice.

At
that moment I felt replenished psychologically. I take in deeper breath as I
extend my legs.  I was moving faster and I knew I could do it. The second
man struggles to cope with me that I easily overtake him. I coordinate my hands
in the same rigorous momentum so that my upper body strength may help to generate
enough power.

A
few metres were left to the finish line that I instantly found myself near
Michael. He was fast but I could keep up.
I had to win this and I need this
I thought. I release the animosity from within and unleash an unstoppable
speed.
It’s all in the head,
Michael had once said. I block the pain
barrier and put my mind somewhere else. Somewhere where my mind would be busy
thinking of the good instead of the bad condition my body was in.

My
thigh, calf and legs all give out a sensational burst of burning spasm. It felt
as if they were on fire. It took me by surprise but retreating was not a
desired option I was keen to take up and beside the few metres brought me
closer to the finishing line. I allow my mind to take control of the situation.

Though
I was running I saw myself sitting beside Samantha. We both stare at each
other’s face. Admiring and appreciating each other’s company. The love that we
had for each other was strong. The eyes never lied, she stares at mine and we
slowly brought our faces closer. We close our eyes and kiss each other.

Crucial
spasm of pain kicks out the day dream of sensual love. The spectators stand up
and cheer up at the top of their lungs. Ten metres was left ahead. I knew that
the time was either now or never. Michael was running at the same pace and at
my peripheral view I noticed uncontrollable frothy saliva falling out of his
mouth.

The
sign of exhaustion was there
.

He
was feeling it as well…

His,
might be worse than mine…

I
won’t go down of dehydration…

I
had drink four litres from yesterday’s evening till I went to sleep…

I
have to open up a bit more

I
can make it….

At
the edge of failing I give out the last remaining conserves fuel and I slowly leave
Michael at the back. I took in more air as I unleash a dynamic and hidden
energy. It felt as if I was floating. The cheering and screaming got louder
until I went through the finishing line. It blows out as my body goes through
it.

I
carry on with a light jog of appreciation of my win. Michael walks slowly while
he tries to catch his breath with his arms at the back of his head. He seems
breathless and his face displays emotion of embarrassment. The third skinny
competitor stand still but immediately bend half way to catch his normal
breathing rate. He then sprays vomit on the turf while the other competitors
run towards him at the finishing line. Fourth place was Tony.

‘Here
comes big Tony the bully…. who thinks that he’s better than anyone, cuffing his
way to the line like an old asthmatic pensioner with lung’s problem.’ Michael
said.

Tony
cuff out loudly as he tries to catch his breath. Four of his team mates run
towards him and hold him. Joey holds his face up while he gives Tony water from
a transparent sport’s bottle. Michael could not stop himself from laughing.

Then
he said aloud, ‘Look at him, Tony the inspired bully and his team of ghouls.
Only one lap and he can barely stand. The one who always make the weakest feel
insecure when he himself, he’s a weak link.’

Those
who was nearby and who overheard it starts to laugh. Hailey walk towards his
boyfriend and Samantha head to where I was standing. Tony raises his eye brows
and stares at Michael. Under each side of his big muscular arms two of his friends
bore the burden of his weight. They try to stand upright as their massive
friend relies on them to stand up.

‘Look
at him. Is he the true bully that he portrays himself to be? The flawless
character that he had wanted us to believe in.’ Michael said.

Tony
forces himself firmly on his legs. As if he had regenerated from the run. He
removes his two strong arms off the back of his friend’s back. It was apparent
from the body language of both of his friends that they were both relieved of
Tony’s weight.  

‘You
must be looking for your best friend.’ Tony said.

‘Who
does this might be?’ Michael asked.

Tony
immediately punches Michael straight in his face and cried out, ‘Mr Knock out!’

Michael
fall backward but he quickly allow his body to roll with the flow of the
motion. He took everyone by surprise when he quickly got back on his feet.
Amazingly and energetically walk towards his opponent with a bloody nose. Tony
throws another punch at him and he dug. Without warning he seizes Tony by his
head with both hands and jump with one of his knee heading for his opponent’s
face.

It
fiercely made a full contact under Tony’s chin that it upset his balance and he
land on his butt. He was shock as it turns out to be an unexpected move. The
crowd cheer at Michael and laugh at his opponent. Tony wipes his bleeding nose
with one hand as his gang moves closer to Michael. They all stare at their
opponent as they slowly head towards him. 

Coach
got into the middle. He quickly blows a whistle to get everybody’s attention. Everybody
stand still, look at him and he angrily scream at them, ‘Both of you! In my
office
,…
now!’

‘You’re
lucky you’re still standing. My boyfriend would have kicked your ass.’ Hailey
said to Michael.

‘Shut
up whore, you’re a disgrace to your kind for the type of man you call
boyfriend. Wake up and taste reality. Your future will be bleak and darker with
him.’ Michael said.

This
took Hailey by surprise that she stays quiet, shows sign of reflecting on the
offensive language which she must had been aware that they were partly facts.

‘Who
are you calling Whore?’ Tony aggressively demands for reasoning as he
approaches his nemesis.

‘I
said both of you in my office. Shall we take it to the principal’s office so
that you both may be expels from the school? Your choice if you want to
graduate or not.’ Coach said as he aggressively points his finger to explain
their options.

‘Phil,’
a young lady’s voice said from the back.

I
have seen her coming towards me before the fight started. I had expected her
but I pretended to be occupied by the comic scenery. What I had failed to
prepare for was how to respond to her.
Perhaps there’s no such thing as a
proper way to respond to the opposite, be myself and act normal
.  

‘Phil.
Are you ignoring me?’

I
turn around and we were facing each other. Inexperience and nervousness hit me.
‘Yes, are you talking to me?’

‘You
see what I meant?’

‘What...
What is it?’ I asked in a stammering motion.

‘Why
am I under the impression that you’re trying to ignore me?’

‘M…Maybe.’
I said stuttering and swallowing the sentence.

She
smile and shy away from staring at me in the eyes. Unsure she chose to look at
her feet instead of me. At that time I knew that she must had been embarrassed as
well. Then she looked at me straight again through the eyes. As if she was
determined to know what I was thinking.

‘Yes?’
She timidly asked as she looks away.

‘Maybe
because I can’t think straight once beautiful eyes like yours stares at me,’
there was a pause. We both shyly glance into each other’s eyes. ‘As if staring
through the windows of my soul,’ I respond nervously.

‘Wow,
the windows of your soul. It sounds a bit like poetry.’

‘I
meant the way we stare through each other’s eyes.’

‘Yes,
I know but I want to know what you really meant by it?’ she joyfully teased.

‘Well,
it’s a start to build something. I call it a bridge of love. Where, it all
begins……’

‘The
beginning of a relationship…….,’she whispered.

‘Exactly…….Maybe
we should hang out together?’

‘Why?’

‘I
like you.’

She
smile and I smile back at her while we both stare into each other’s eyes with a
passion. I could feel some kind of connection being built between us. A bond of
friendship and a desire of a new beginning of a new found matured feelings
known only as love. It was all around us. It was an unexplained pleasant
feeling which came out from the gut of my soul.  

‘You
don’t have to.’ Samantha said as she smiles. ‘You’ve got yourself a number one
fan!’ Samantha added as she exclaims heartily. 

I
was speechless. She noticed that I was out of words. She smile and I return the
same gesture. Then Samantha said as she walks backward, ‘I’ll see you later in
class.’

‘Sure,
perhaps we can go out together.’ I diplomatically send my message across in a
more confident manner. I was no longer afraid as my fears had already been
consumed by her kindness and her envy to know me.

‘Sure,
why not? I would like that.’