the wind off the mountains. He nipped at them when he
crossed the wet ground by the shore. That wind was just
fresh sky and water. It could continue for many days in a
row, caressing the hardy yellow flower heads as they swayed
and bobbed. The rowans had unfolded their leaves in long
points like bird claws, white side up in the breeze. The wind
sang in the birch leaves.
The wind off the mountains never bothered him. It never
brought anything stinging or sticky, nothing worrisome or
threatening like the capricious wind that sometimes blew the
water in the rapids back against the flow. The wind off the
mountains was steady. Sometimes it picked up and then the
lake showed its white fangs off in the distance. High above,
the wind sang in the spruces. In the grass it was warm. The
creatures that rustled and squeaked weren't affected by the
wind, even when it made enormous waves in the grass.
The wind raised the fur on his back but his muzzle was
down among the voles. The grass was so full of strong smells
that he sometimes had to raise his head to clear his nose. It
smelled of yarrow about to bloom, a compact, heavily spicy
scent. The mouldering humus was steaming, crawling with
blind, hard-shelled insects that ground their teeth, crisscrossed
by fat, industrious bugs the thrushes could find by
listening. He himself caught them only by chance when his
sharp claws scratched the ground. The delicate scents of
cranesbill, cow parsley, buttercup, snakeweed and the slender,
hardy bluebell, sheep's sorrel and tormentil were intermingled
with that of the grass. The hoverflies and wasps and the
fuzzy bumblebees filled the world that was the flowering
roof of the pasture with a slowly rising and falling hum.
The dog ploughed through the grass, leaving deep furrows
behind him. Sometimes when the sun, the scents and
the sounds made him dizzy with languid pleasure, a delight
so sweet it almost tickled, he lay belly up, rubbing his back
against the grassy carpet. He wriggled, his body coiling,
front paws waving. Afterwards he got up quickly and shook
his coat. When he ambled off he was himself again, composed
and on guard. Behind him the grass was flattened and
the thin blades of cranesbill and starwort were pressed down.
Vessels had been broken, green blood was flowing. Slowly
the work began to restore everything to its pre-disaster state.
Fluids found their way to vessels that didn't leak. Wounds
dried up and blisters healed. By then, though, he was already
lying on a rock near the shore, licking his coat clean from
everything that had stuck to it in the sea of grass.
At night the large grey creatures emerged. They were often
standing down where the forest met the marsh. In the stillness
they resembled rocks and shadows, heavy shapes that
dissolved in the dark and seemed to disperse among the tree
trunks. His ears and nose told him where they were but his
eyes could no longer make them out.
Resting in his old sleeping place, he became accustomed
to them. Their movements were slow and imposing and they
made careless noises, breaking twigs and tramping through
mud with their hooves. They made wheezing sounds and
the bark ripped in their powerful teeth. He saw their legs
moving, white in the dim light. They were always together.
It was quite a while before he realised there were two of
them. If one appeared at the edge of the marsh in the erratic
dawn rays flickering before his eyes, if the shadows and the
sound of snapping twigs coalesced into a single body, then he
knew there would be another one down there too. He listened,
one ear cocked, for the one who was missing.
But he didn't know they were yearlings, or that the female
moose who had given birth to them and nursed them last
year was the carcass that had kept him alive from late winter
to spring. The hunters had sent the dogs after her but she got
away. She'd survived till midwinter with a shattered jaw, and
had died of starvation.
His nose was honed in on voles and mice and the concentrated
smell of bird nests; he ignored most of what the
ground and grass could tell him. There was a blur of smells
everywhere.
But he followed the tracks of the moose. Plunging into
the fresh trails they made gave him intense pleasure. His
entire body quivered in a frenzy of joy. But when he picked
up their scent he stopped. He could hear them wheezing. A
yelp forced its way out of his throat, confusing him, and he
pulled back.
Restlessness came over him. All the creatures living in
dens and holes, moving about in the pale light under the
trees, creating new wafts of scent in the night, all of them
had their own ways. Only he walked with his nose to the
ground, searching and listening, waiting. When he'd found
a mouthful that relieved the pangs of hunger he looked for
a place to sleep, but he was always expectant.
No one came. His restlessness stirred as the light faded. It
became intense when the smell of moose in the tracks
merged with their scent in the air. Bewildered, he withdrew
under a spruce, licking his paws and listening. It seemed as if
each and every creature around him had scents and trails that
were their own and he was the only one searching for a way
to make sense of a jumble of sounds and restless shadows.
But he didn't find it. He could find no trace of the pack he'd
once belonged to.
He was on his own, working out what he needed to
know. A short-eared owl had swiped him across the face
with the side of her wing. He'd thought it was a game bird
when he heard the swoosh, but game birds fled, flapping off
between the trees, not even attacking in self-defence. Owls,
though, dived down. From that day on he listened for that
swooshing noise, distinct from the sound of game birds.
One morning as he was standing at the water's edge,
nosing around for fish the otter had left, the stones shifted.
When he tried to pull himself up one of his hind legs was
caught. It was a long time before he managed to free himself,
and then only with great effort and intense pain.
The soreness stayed with him. The collapse of the stones
was a longer-lasting lesson than the reprimand of the owl. He
walked on three legs, hobbling and hopping when he had to.
During this period his corkscrew tail was often limp. He
didn't go lame, but when the wound healed he had a bump
on his hock that he often licked. When the mornings were
cold and rainy the pain reawakened. He grew accustomed to
it. The pain became part of him, just like the bump.
He knew what to expect from the owl. When she
plunged, gilding on outspread wings, he should keep out of
the way. The owl and the stones.
There were other things that didn't reveal themselves. He
no longer ambled along as he'd done as a pup, absentminded
and eager. He crossed open spaces quickly, hunching
down, his entire body tense from listening. When the
summer heat hung over the pasture and the murmur of bird
calls died out towards morning, he was a thin, muscular dog
who often stood by a birch or a rowan, letting the shadow of
the leaves play across his dark mask and slanted eyes as if he
were aware of them and wanted to conceal them so they
wouldn't give him away. He avoided the rustling aspens,
which interfered with listening, and he avoided the side of
the point near the rapids except for an occasional early
morning foray to sniff for fish scraps.
More and more often, he followed the trail of the moose. It
served no purpose but felt compelling. His eagerness had no
direction, no goal, and always left him bewildered. But the
scent took him farther and farther from the little world near the
cabin that he knew so well: the marsh, the pasture, the point.
He found his way to other marshes, to rocky terrain covered
with bog moss, dark forests with wood grouse, swampy shores
of dark, unfamiliar lakes. Above him a buzzard screeched.
He always caused a commotion. Birds flew up in front of
him with piercing shrieks that went on for a long, long time.
That could mean eggs. He searched, nose to the grass, letting
the shrieks guide-him. When they grew loud and anguished
he was close, when they died out he'd lost the trail.
Now there were bodies inside the eggs. Most of the time,
though, only the shells were left; the warm, moist contents
were gone. He wasn't interested in the shells. The young that
had hatched by the shore fled to safety in the water, leaving
tiny rippling wakes on the smooth surface. He tested the
wetness with his paw but didn't like it. Once he'd plunged in
after them, but when his paws no longer touched bottom he
couldn't see across the water. He paddled, but no matter how
far he stretched his neck he didn't catch sight of anything
alive, so he turned back to land, shook himself thoroughly
and loped off without looking back.
While following the moose trail, he'd come across a body
of water not far from the marsh. He began including it in his
daily rounds. Each time he went there and walked around
the shore he was less tense and hunched down.
It was a tarn, black and almost round, quite near the big lake.
A brook made its way down through the dense forest of old
spruce, bringing water from the tarn to the larger lake, an
inland sea with cold, restless blue water that never was silent.
The beavers had made a dam in the brook. Along the far
bank the spruces and small pines were turning yellow. On his
side the banks were steeper. Though the soil was full of passageways
the ground held; water hadn't reached the roots of
the trees and they were still healthy. In the passageways the
scent of beaver was strong.
In the evening the steep side was sunny and he lay there in
a dense thicket of crowberry brush and bilberry, letting the
warmth sink into his fur. If he lay still for a long time he
sometimes caught sight of a beaver's head gleaming in the
light, cutting straight through the water. He always followed
the beavers with his gaze but didn't move or become agitated.
It was impossible to get near them.
By the passageways along the banks where the beavers
came ashore there was nothing for him. He picked up their
particular scent and the smell of their droppings. There were
no fish scraps, not a single feather, either, but they left
stripped branches everywhere.
The loud splash of a large, flat tail sometimes awakened
him. He liked lying there listening to them. The sound of
their gnawing could be heard from far off. When they
thought they were alone they poked around on the shore.
They were clumsy on land. He couldn't see them, but he
could hear their heavy bodies and the twigs that snapped in
their jaws.
The sun was low in the sky. It was no longer warm but
stung in his eyes as it played among the trunks of the spruces.
He liked lying there listening to sounds that signalled neither
flight nor a threat. He and the beavers had nothing to do
with each other, but they were there, in the same evening
sun, by the same dark water that glowed in its reflection. He
liked the sounds they made, their company.
A vole in the grass. He heard it a moment ago. He recognised
the sound of the hindquarters, heavy and sliding. It's not the
scampering of a mouse.
He's standing tense, head lowered. His ears are cocked
forward, the cartilage stiff, the hairs raised.
They're both stock-still now, but as soon as the vole at his
feet moves, he'll pounce. Down there is the warm world of
the grass with its whirring and humming, but he's only listening
for one distinct sound: the vole. It's there
somewhere, blinking, its heart pumping blood, listening,
every hair in its grey-brown fur on end.
The dog remains still so he won't lose the scent. The wind
off the lake blows through the meadowgrass; the pasture billows
and shimmers, blinding him. But he doesn't move. In
the jumble of sounds under and above him there's only one
sound he's waiting for.
He never tires. A vole that's not threatened moves straight
through the grass, perhaps towards its nest. It may freeze
warily in its tracks but will start moving again. The dog often
misses when he tries pouncing in the cover of grass, but his
ears never lose track of a vole that has come to a halt somewhere
beneath him among the coarse stalks of wolfsbane.
Now. A faint sliding. The cow parsley doesn't move, but
that's where it came from. The dog is poised for the strike.
His nose and front legs dive into the grass. He's got it, but
only for a moment. Frenzied wriggling under his front paws.
Then it scurries between his legs. Two more tries. It's injured
and can't get away. Now he bites and the tiny, warm body
goes limp between his jaws.