The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) (188 page)

I swear by this leek, I will get revenge. I swear as I eat it.

Fluellen

Eat, I pray you. Will you have some more sauce to


your leek? There is not enough leek to swear by.

Eat it all. Don’t throw any away. The skin is good for your broken head. Next time you see leeks, I dare you to mock at them. That’s all.

Pistol

Quiet thy cudgel; thou dost see I eat.

Shut your mouth. I am eating it.

Fluellen

Much good do you, scald knave, heartily. Nay, pray you,


throw none away; the skin is good for your broken coxcomb.


When you take occasions to see leeks herefter, I pray you,


mock at 'em; that is all.

Pistol

Good.

Good.

Fluellen

Ay, leeks is good. Hold you, there is a groat to heal


your pate.

Yes, leeks are good. Here is some money to heal your wounds.

Pistol

Me a groat!

Money, for me?

Fluellen

Yes, verily and in truth you shall take it; or I have


another leek in my pocket, which you shall eat.

Yes. Take it or I have another leek in my pocket for you to eat.

Pistol

I take thy groat in earnest of revenge.

I’ll take your money as a reminder of revenge.

Fluellen

If I owe you anything I will pay you in cudgels. You


shall be a woodmonger, and buy nothing of me but cudgels.


God be wi' you, and keep you, and heal your pate.

If I owe you anything, I’ll pay you in beatings. God be with you, keep you safe, and heal your head.

Exit.

Pistol

All hell shall stir for this.

All hell will break for this.

Gower

Go, go; you are a couterfeit cowardly knave. Will you mock


at an ancient tradition, begun upon an honourable respect, and worn as a memorable trophy of predeceased valour, and dare not avouch in your deeds any of your words? I have seen you gleeking and galling at this gentleman twice or thrice. You thought, because he could not speak English in the native garb, he could not therefore handle an English cudgel. You find it otherwise; and henceforth let a Welsh correction teach you a good English condition. Fare ye well.

Go on. You are a fake, cowardly villain. How dare you mock an ancient tradition steeped in honor, but not back it up with actions? I have seen you mocking this man more than once. You thought, because he could not speak English well, he couldn’t handle you. Let this be a lesson to you. Farewell.

Exit.

Pistol

Doth Fortune play the huswife with me now?


News have I, that my Doll is dead i' the spital


Of malady of France;


And there my rendezvous is quite cut off.


Old I do wax; and from my weary limbs


Honour is cudgell'd. Well, bawd I'll turn,


And something lean to cutpurse of quick hand.


To England will I steal, and there I'll steal;


And patches will I get unto these cudgell'd scars,


And swear I got them in the Gallia wars.

Is Fortune is playing housewife with me? My Nell has died and she was my last hope. I am getting old and have nothing left. I will return to stealing and my former life. First, I’ll steal away to England, and steal some more when I get there. I’ll tell everyone these wounds are from the French wars.

Exit.

Enter, at one door King Henry, Exeter, Bedford, Gloucester, Warwick, Westmoreland, and other Lords; at another, the French King, Queen Isabel the Princess Katharine, Alice and other Ladies; the Duke of Burgundy and his train.

King

Peace to this meeting, wherefore we are met!


Unto our brother France, and to our sister,


Health and fair time of day; joy and good wishes


To our most fair and princely cousin Katharine;


And, as a branch and member of this royalty,


By whom this great assembly is contriv'd,


We do salute you, Duke of Burgundy;


And, princes French, and peers, health to you all!

May this meeting be peaceful. We wish health to our brother France and good wishes to our sister and Princess Katharine. We salute you, Duke of Burgundy, and wish good health to all the French princes and peers.

French King

Right joyous are we to behold your face,


Most worthy brother England; fairly met!


So are you, princes English, every one.

We are happy to see you, most worthy brother England and noble English princes.

Queen Isabel

So happy be the issue, brother England,


Of this good day and of this gracious meeting


As we are now glad to behold your eyes;


Your eyes, which hitherto have borne in them


Against the French that met them in their bent


The fatal balls of murdering basilisks.


The venom of such looks, we fairly hope,


Have lost their quality; and that this day


Shall change all griefs and quarrels into love.

I salute you, English princes.

Burgundy

My duty to you both, on equal love,


Great Kings of France and England! That I have labour'd,


With all my wits, my pains, and strong endeavours,


To bring your most imperial Majesties


Unto this bar and royal interview,


Your mightiness on both parts best can witness.


Since then my office hath so far prevail'd


That, face to face and royal eye to eye,


You have congreeted, let it not disgrace me


If I demand, before this royal view,


What rub or what impediment there is,


Why that the naked, poor, and mangled Peace,


Dear nurse of arts, plenties, and joyful births,


Should not in this best garden of the world,


Our fertile France, put up her lovely visage?


Alas, she hath from France too long been chas'd,


And all her husbandry doth lie on heaps,


Corrupting in it own fertility.


Her vine, the merry cheerer of the heart,


Unpruned dies; her hedges even-pleach'd,


Like prisoners wildly overgrown with hair,


Put forth disorder'd twigs; her fallow leas


The darnel, hemlock, and rank fumitory,


Doth root upon, while that the coulter rusts


That should deracinate such savagery;


The even mead, that erst brought sweetly forth


The freckled cowslip, burnet, and green clover,


Wanting the scythe, all uncorrected, rank,


Conceives by idleness, and nothing teems


But hateful docks, rough thistles, kexes, burs,


Losing both beauty and utility;


And as our vineyards, fallows, meads, and hedges,


Defective in their natures, grow to wildness.


Even so our houses and ourselves and children


Have lost, or do not learn for want of time,


The sciences that should become our country;


But grow like savages,--as soldiers will


That nothing do but meditate on blood,--


To swearing and stern looks, diffus'd attire,


And everything that seems unnatural.


Which to reduce into our former favour


You are assembled; and my speech entreats


That I may know the let, why gentle Peace


Should not expel these inconveniences


And bless us with her former qualities.

I give my duty to both of you, great kings of France and England! I have worked with everything I am to bring your majesties to this meeting. Since I have accomplished my job, please allow me to ask for peace. Shouldn’t France have as much? She has been chased too long and her fertility compromised with disorder. Her once beautiful flowers are dead. Our children grow like soldiers, meditating on death. Everything is in total disarray; therefore, I must ask for peace, so we may return to our former state.

King

If, Duke of Burgundy, you would the peace,


Whose want gives growth to the imperfections


Which you have cited, you must buy that peace


With full accord to all our just demands;


Whose tenours and particular effects


You have enschedul'd briefly in your hands.

If you would like peace, whose absence has caused these imperfections, all you must do is agree to our just demands.

Burgundy

The King hath heard them; to the which as yet


There is no answer made.

The king has heard them, but he has yet to answer.

King

Well, then, the peace,


Which you before so urg'd, lies in his answer.

Well, peace lies in his answer.

French King

I have but with a cursorary eye


O'erglanc'd the articles. Pleaseth your Grace


To appoint some of your council presently


To sit with us once more, with better heed


To re-survey them, we will suddenly


Pass our accept and peremptory answer.

I have looked over them briefly. If it pleases your grace, I would like to appoint some of your councilmen here to sit with us and go over them again. Then, I will give my answer.

King

Brother, we shall. Go, uncle Exeter,


And brother Clarence, and you, brother Gloucester,


Warwick, and Huntington, go with the King;


And take with you free power to ratify,


Augment, or alter, as your wisdoms best


Shall see advantageable for our dignity,


Anything in or out of our demands,


And we'll consign thereto. Will you, fair sister,


Go with the princes, or stay here with us?