The Bright Side (20 page)

“Jackie?
”

I froze. The voice was familiar, but I didn’t immediately attach a face. I got to my feet and turned around. Eddie from the office was standing not twenty feet away. He was looking at me the way you might look at someone who was naked and waving a sword around
.

“Are you okay?” he asked
.

I smiled as broadly as I could, a move which, judging by the way he flinched, alarmed him even more. “I’m fine, Eddie. How, eh … how are you?
”

“I’m fine too, thank you. Um … you know you just … had a little accident? Two of them, really.
”

I
nodded
and
briefly
showed
him
my
palms
as
if
to
say,
What
are
you
gonna
do?

He stepped closer, but not too close. “You’re absolutely sure you’re all right?
”

“Oh yes,” I nodded and did the too-broad smile again. My mind raced on ahead of me. There didn’t seem to be anything sensible I could say. I decided to just stand there smiling and nodding until he went away
.

“I don’t want to interfere,” Eddie said then. “It’s none of my business …
”

I did a bit more nodding
.

“But I’ve been here for a while.” He pointed his thumb behind him to the First Premier entrance. “I was in the office and I came down and I, eh … saw you. Having your accidents.
”

“How come you’re in work on a Saturday?” I asked. It was a ridiculous thing to say, of course, but I was pleased with how reasonable I managed to make it sound
.

Eddie went up on his toes. “Me? I was just …” He half- turned and pointed to the door again. “Y’know.
”

Oh-hoh
, I thought.
He’s
up
to
something
. I didn’t particularly care what it was, but I knew an opportunity for diversion when I saw one
.

“Sounds very mysterious, Eddie.” I looked at the bag he was carrying over his shoulder. “Don’t tell me you were stealing stationery?
”

“Stationery? No! No. I wasn’t stealing stationery. I wasn’t stealing
anything
.
”

“Are you sure?
”

He nodded with great solemnity, as if I’d just asked him if he was sure he wasn’t a serial killer. “Positive.
”

“I see. So you don’t want to tell me what you’re doing here on a Saturday?
”

This was a shameful attempt to take advantage of Eddie’s shyness. I thought he would be so disturbed by my probing into his personal affairs that he would back away from the conversation, quite possibly literally. But he didn’t
.

He put his chin in the air and said, “What about you? Do you want to tell me why you’re deliberately driving someone else’s car into a pillar?
”

“It isn’t someone else’s car,” I lied, pathetically. “It’s my car.” “No, it isn’t,” Eddie said. “That’s your car over there.” He pointed to my Micra. There was a tiny pause during which I considered telling him he was mistaken. I stopped myself just before I made the small leap from pathetic to contemptible. “It’s almost my car, all right? It’s my husband’s, if you must know, so there’s no need to call the cops or anything.
”

“I wasn’t going to call the cops.” “Good.
”

He looked at me with both eyebrows raised, waiting for more information. When I stayed quiet, he flat out asked me for it. It was unlike Eddie to be so bold and I could tell that it took a lot out of him
.

“How come you’re wrecking your husband’s car?” he said, then exhaled at length
.

I thought,
To
foster
good
relations
with
my
sister,
why
do
you think?
“I’d prefer not to get into it.”

“Okay. Fair enough.
”

He capitulated so easily that I felt obliged to throw him a bone. “He upset me, that’s all. Badly.
”

“Oh. It must have been something pretty serious.” “Yup. It was.
”

“Don’t
tell
me
you
caught
him
kissing
another
woman
…” This,
I
could
tell,
was
an
attempt
to
add
some
levity.
But
I
was
unable
to
keep
my
expression
neutral
.

“Oh no!” Eddie said, eyes bulging. “No! He kissed someone else!
”

Kissed?
I thought
.
What planet was he on? “Eddie, please, I really don’t –
”

“But how could he? How could he do that to you?” “Eddie –
”

“That’s disgraceful! Really, that’s beyond – Are you all right? Stupid question, good man, Eddie, of course you’re not all right.
”

“I’m fine.
”

“No, you’re not, you’re out wrecking cars. Which is understandable! You’ve had a terrible blow. God love you. It’s just … I don’t know …
”

He was as exercised as I’d ever seen him. I felt like I was the one who should be doing the comforting
.

“How did you find out?” he asked and then immediately raised a hand. “No, sorry. Don’t answer that. I should mind my own. Nothing to do with me.
”

“Do you really want to know?” I asked. It was a rhetorical question, just something to say. Eddie took it seriously. He rubbed a finger across his chin, deep in thought. “Yes,” he said, after an age. “Yes, I do want to know.
”

I went back on my heels. “Oh. You do.
”

“If
you
want
to
tell
me,
I
mean.
It’s
up
to
you.
But
I’m
a
very
good
listener.
I’ve
had
a
lot
of
compliments
on
my listening.
Well,
a
few
…
”

I thought about it. Eddie was virtually a stranger. There was nothing to be gained by telling him, it seemed. But I felt a strong compulsion to justify my actions
.

“All right then,” I said. “When I went home from work yesterday –
”

“Oh! I meant to ask. How is your headache? Jenny told me about it. Are you okay now?” He looked genuinely concerned
.

“I’m fine now,” I said. “When I went –
”

“My cousin gets migraines. She has to sit in the dark all day with –
”

“Eddie! Jesus! Do you want to hear this or not?” “Sorry. Sorry. Tell me.
”

“When
I
arrived
home
yesterday
I
caught
my
husband
…”
I
hesitated
.

“Caught him doing what?” he asked softly
.

I stared at him. “Can’t you finish the thought on your own?” I croaked
.

“Kissing another woman?
”

“No, not kissing another woman. Screwing one.” “Sex,” he nodded ruefully
.

“Yes, Eddie, sex. In my own front room.
”

“Jesus. You’d think he would have at least gone to a hotel or round to her place.
”

I began to think that Eddie’s reputation as a listener was ill-deserved. “Yeah, you’d think that all right. But they didn’t bother.
”

He became lost in thought again. “How are you supposed to just sit there in future watching the telly or doing a Sudoku? Knowing that’s the very room –
”

“All right, Eddie, that’s enough.
”

“Sorry, sorry. Do you know her, this
fancy-woman?” “This what?
”

“Fancy-woman.
”

“I heard you, I just … Yes, I know her. A little bit. She’s our next-door neighbour.
”

This last nugget of information was too much for him. He put one hand on his hip and shook his head as if he’d never heard anything quite so shocking in his life. And maybe he hadn’t. We stood there for a moment in silence
.

Then Eddie said, “What are you going to do?” I shrugged. “I don’t know.
”

“But you’re definitely leaving him, aren’t you?” “Christ, Eddie, I haven’t really thought about it.
”

A look of pure confusion overran his face. “But … he took a vow.
”

I reached into my bag for my cigarettes. “Sorry?
”

“When you got married. He took a solemn vow not to, you know …” He made a gesture that I couldn’t decipher. “You know … not to go around … having sexual … with your neighbours.
”

We
both
did
, I thought, as I struck up the lighter. “That’s true, Eddie. But marriage is complicated.
”

He looked me right in the eye. “No, it isn’t,” he said. And I just lost it
.

CHAPTER
10

Twenty
minutes
later,
we
were
sitting
at
the
table
by
the window
in
Franco’s,
the
tiny
café
across
the
road
from
First
Premier.
As
soon
as
it
became
clear
that
I
wasn’t
going to
stop
crying
any
time
soon,
Eddie
had
more
or
less
dragged me
along
there.
Anybody
else
might
have
thought
that privacy
was
the
order
of
the
day,
but
not
Eddie.
He
insisted that
“a
nice
cup
of
tea”
was
the
only
thing
that
could
sort
me out.
He
must
have
said
it
half
a
dozen
times.
And
it
was never
“tea”
or
“a
cup
of
tea”,
always
“a
nice
cup
of
tea”.
I failed
to
see
the
benefit
at
the
time
but
had
to
admit
that
my tears
dried
up
as
soon
as
I
sat
down
on
the
ancient,
creaky chair. The
tea
itself
seemed
incidental
to
the
cure,
but
I
was glad
of
that
too
.