The Boy from Aleppo Who Painted the War (15 page)

I hear the phone ring in the sitting room. I haven't heard that sound for a long time. I run to the sitting room and answer.

‘Allo!' I am so happy to even say ‘hello' again.

‘Allo! Can you hear me? It's me', says the voice. I don't know why people say that on the phone. Who is ‘me'? Why don't they just say their name? It would be so much easier. I recognise the voice but I don't know who it is exactly.

‘Yes I can hear you. Who is it?'

‘It must be Adam! You're the only one who speaks politely. It's me, your aunt!' She laughs. I have many aunts, so this doesn't make it any easier.

‘Which aunt is it?'

‘Haha! You haven't changed one bit. It's me, Aunt Suha,' she says. I like Aunt Suha, she's mama's sister. She used to always come over and invite us to her house in Damascus. She has a big swimming pool I used to always swim in. I wish I was there.

‘How are you? How's your family? Are you safe?' I don't know which question to answer first. She asked too many. I can hear her whispering to someone next to her but I can't hear what they are saying.

‘Do you still have a swimming pool in your house Auntie Suha?'

‘Yes! come over!' She laughs.

‘How do I get to you ?'

‘Ask Yasmine, where is she?'

‘Three men took her away. I think she will come back soon.'

‘What do you mean three men took her? What happened? Speak quickly.' Whenever I am told to speak quickly I don't know what to say. It's like my brain shuts down. Why can't people just listen to what I say instead of telling me to speak quickly.

‘Are you still there Adam? Is there anyone else I can speak to?'

I look around and see Khalid coming into the room.

‘Who is on the phone?' He runs to me and smiles for the first time since Yasmine left.

‘Auntie Suha.'

He grabs the phone out of my hand and starts speaking fast explaining everything. Why can't I do that? Why am I so different?

I walk to the light and put it on. Light really makes a difference. The power is back.

I tug on Khalid's shirt but he doesn't move.

‘Khalid!'

‘Shhh!'

‘Khalid how do I go to Damascus?' Khalid doesn't answer me and continues to tell Auntie Suha the whole story. Why does he have to explain everything? I can hear her loud voice from across the phone.

Khalid puts the phone down and sits down on the chair. He doesn't look at me, he looks down at his hands then puts them through his hair. He breathes in and out heavily like a boy in my class who has asthma. Khalid doesn't have asthma though.

‘Khalid how do I get to Damascus? I want to go to the swimming pool.'

‘I don't have time for you now Adam.'

How does he not have time for me? There are 24 hours a day and 1,440 minutes. He doesn't use them all. He is just sitting down not doing anything now.

‘Why Khalid? What are you doing?'

He looks up at me and his eyes are red. It looks like veins exploded in his eyes.

‘Adam please, just leave.'

‘Where shall I go?'

‘Wherever you want.'

I walk out to the door and open it to get some fresh air. I can't see the dead men outside because they are around the corner but I know they're there so I can feel them looking at me. There's a cat lying by the neighbours' house. I wonder if the bodies are still there? Does anybody else live there? I get up and walk over. The cat starts hissing the moment I get near the door. I lean down and start caressing its fur. It's a black cat with white eyes. I think it's blind. I can feel the ribs when I touch it. I wonder if it eats anything. Mama used to throw food out to the cats but I don't know if Yasmine ever did. Is it hungry? I pick it up and put it against my chest. Maybe I can hide it in my room and look after it. I can have a new pet. I'll name it Liquorice because it reminds me of my favourite sweet. I open the neighbours' door and the cat starts hissing again. I caress its fur so it can relax. Maybe it just wants food. It doesn't stop hissing though. The house is dark inside and the smell is so strong. I don't know what it smells of but it gives me a headache straightaway. Liquorice is trying to get out of my hands, I hold it tighter but it runs out.

‘Come here Liquorice!'

I have never told anyone to do things, I am always the one being told because I'm the youngest. It feels good.

‘No Liquorice, come here!'

I run after it but the smell gets stronger and I can't go any further.

‘Come…'

I'm too scared. I don't want to go in any more. It's like the smell is ganging up on me ready to punch me in the stomach. I stop and open the door where the cat snuck in. I open it slowly, something doesn't feel right. The only thing I can see is Liquorice's tail moving from side to side. What is she doing? I open the door a little more and hear the cat sniffing around. There's no light but I can see everything clearly. This is where the smell is coming from. There are so many dead people lying on the ground. I can't count how many people there are. They are all lying face up next to each other covered in white cloth. I don't know if Ali's family are there. I can't recognise any faces. Why are they all here? Who put them here? It smells of feet, blood and mould. I can't describe how horrible it is. I can feel my thoughts becoming more distant the more I stare. Liquorice is going around sniffing them. She's hungry. I know the feeling of me losing track. It means I'm going to faint. I start to feel nauseous. I gag but don't vomit. I run out of the house as quickly as possible before anything happens. I don't want to faint in-between dead people. No one can help me. I reach the entrance and breathe in and out like I haven't had fresh air in years. My lungs feel tight. I didn't realise I was holding my breath inside.

Why did I go in there? I sometimes get too curious and end up feeling sick. I wait outside for Liquorice to come out while saying my prayers. Who is dumping the bodies at the neighbours' house? I feel like I am in a detective movie. Maybe I should take this case on and find out who dumps the bodies next door. I can be the Syrian Sherlock Holmes.

Liquorice comes out at last and we run into the house. I look out to see if there is anyone in the sitting room before running into my room. I put Liquorice onto my bed and sit down and breathe in and out. I don't know why I am out of breath. I didn't run much.

I lie down on the bed and the cat climbs on my stomach and curls up. I think it likes me. I like the feeling of having a warm stomach. I feel sleepy. I don't do much all day but I am always tired. I don't want to end up like Ali. I don't even know if he got up. He never comes out of the guest room.

*

I wake up to Liquorice still on my stomach. I don't think I slept for that long. It's still just getting dark. I had a bad dream. I wish Yasmine were here. I always go to her after I have a bad dream. She usually warms up milk for me and lets me sit in her room. I was dreaming of the girl with the Nutella eyes. She was running to me and I felt happy. I was thinking that I at last have a friend that I really like. She reached me and fell to the ground and started kissing my feet. I jumped back and then she stood up and her eyes turned into mama's eyes and she was telling me to run back with her. I was trying to escape but I couldn't run. That's when I woke up. I don't know why Nutella-girl's eyes would turn into mama's? They look wrong but right at the same time. They look familiar I guess.

Liquorice purrs at me.

‘Did you sleep well Liquorice?'

Liquorice looks up at me but doesn't answer. I need to train her to understand me. This is going to be fun. I don't need any more friends. I think it is a she. Liquorice sounds like a she.

I suddenly hear gunshots outside and I look out to see a tank coming down our street. My heart sinks to my feet. I have never seen a tank in reality. I run out to look for everyone and tell them.

‘Amira! There's a tank outside!'

‘No, there isn't,' she replies without looking back. I need to look for Tariq and Khalid. I knock on Khalid's room three times and wait for him to tell me to come in.

‘Khalid come out, there's a tank outside!'

‘What? Those bastards! Do you know about the secret room?'

‘Yes.'

‘Go there till I tell you to come out.'

‘Can I take Liquorice with me?'

‘What are you talking about? We don't have liquorice.'

‘Liquorice is my new cat.'

‘Adam! Just go to the room!'

I can hear people screaming outside. I pick Liquorice up and run into the room. This time it's empty. I sit back and whisper a song to Liquorice that mama used to sing to me. Come back Yasmine. I don't know how to do anything without you.

I hear Ali's voice and jump up. I have been waiting for him to get up. I put my ear against the door and then open it a little so I can listen. Baba's room's door is wide open but I can't see anyone in that line. I hear a door break down and Amira shout. What is going on? I can hear deep voices coming closer. How many men are coming into our house? I see the shadow of a man but I don't know who it is.

I hear Baba's voice, but I am scared to go out. Khalid said I should stay here. I am scared. What do they want from us? God please don't let them hurt any of us. I can hear plates being crushed along with shouting and screaming. I push myself back to the corner and cover my eyes in Liquorice's fur.

‘You want freedom huh? I'll show you freedom you sons of dogs!'

‘I beg you let us go, please. I'll kiss your feet' I can hear Amira's voice.

What are they doing to them? I suddenly hear the sound of Amira screaming. I don't hear anybody else's voice. What are they doing? I sneak a look through the crack again but I still can't see anything.

I don't know how long I wait in the corner singing quietly to myself but after some time I hear nothing and see no shadows. The house is silent. It makes me shiver. I step out of the room quietly and pass through Baba's room. Liquorice doesn't squirm in my arms. She stays still. I enter the sitting room and find the sofa's ripped up and upside down, plates on the floor smashed and our TV in pieces on top of the table in the middle of the room. Baba is in the middle lying on the ground. His eyes are open. I can see them, but he doesn't blink. I run to him without looking for anybody else.

‘Baba! Baba! Can you hear me?'

‘Khalid…'

‘Baba, I'm Adam!'

‘Khalid…'

I look to see if I can see Khalid but I don't see him around. Ali is holding onto Amira's waist while she gets up to start cleaning up.

I stroke Baba's face and try to get him to get up. Amira goes on cleaning without moving Ali off. She sings quietly to herself. I can just hear a low humming sound. Everything is dark and messy. Even her humming sounds dark.

‘Baba, get up.'

Baba doesn't answer, he holds my hand and I try to pull him up slowly. Where's Khalid? I'm scared to ask.

‘What happened Baba?'

‘Khanjar,' Ali answers. I don't know what he means.

‘What do you mean?'

‘He's a mercenary. I have been hearing his name.'

‘What was he doing here?'

‘Ruining our lives.'

‘Where's Khalid?'

‘They took him.'

‘What?'

‘Yes, there goes another one of us.'

I run to the door and scream Khalid's name. They can't take him as well. They already took everybody else! I scream till I feel my voice become grainy. I stop before I lose my voice completely. My mind is still screaming Khalid's name though. If Yasmine was here she would know what to do. Come back Yasmine, come back Khalid. I don't want to miss anyone any more. I want them to be with me. Why are they taking my brothers and sisters? What did we do to them? I have never taken any of their family. I wipe my tears away and feel my fingers scratch my face. I look down at my hands. They look like Baba's. My skin is hard and rough and it looks like I have been scraping it on wood. I spit on my hands and rub them together so I can moisturise them but I can't spit a lot. My mouth is too dry. Are my hands like this because I paint? I go back in and ask Ali to look at his hands. His are like mine.

I sit next to Baba and try not to cry. Baba is crying. His body is shaking.

‘Will Khalid come back Baba?'

‘I don't know Adam. I hope you never feel the pain of your child being taken away from you.'

‘Khalid is not a child Baba.'

‘He is my child!'

Baba doesn't explain what he means as he usually does, he just gives me the same answer. I wish I understood. I rock myself and try to sing in my brain. Music makes me calm down. I get up and start praying. I don't have my Wudhu but I have the sudden urge to just get up and pray to God. I know God will help me.

‘I spoke to Yasmine in my dream yesterday,' Baba said.

‘How Baba? What did she say?'

‘She didn't say anything, she stayed quiet, I was speaking.'

‘What did you tell her? Did you tell her to come back Baba?'

‘Yes I did. I think she is okay. If you dream of speaking to someone apparently it's a sign.'

‘Yes! Yes! Yasmine is coming back!'

‘Shh Adam, it's just a saying I don't know if it's true. Let's just say God willing.' Baba wipes his tears.

‘I know she is coming back Baba.'

I
T HAS BEEN 32 DAYS
and four hours since Yasmine left. I started counting her missing days ever since my head stopped hurting me. I wait for her every day by the grocery store she last left me at but she hasn't shown up yet. I go there every day at 3:30 p.m and hope that the men will let her go. I know she'll be back, I just don't know how long she'll take. I really miss her. The house has been quiet without her. Baba is always in his room and the boys are out protesting and come back late at night tired and go to sleep. I have been starving and no one is eating. We have no food at home but Amira is helping me boil water every day on the fireplace. The electricity hasn't come in eight days. We have been living in the dark. Every day the sound of the prayer is mixed with gunshots or bombs. Ali has been sleeping most of the days. He wakes up for two hours and goes back to sleep. I don't know why. Amira's face now looks like a slab of wood. It's thin and long. She still puts her makeup on every day.