The Blame (6 page)

Laura felt exasperated. What did it take to get the message through to these men? This was the second jobsite that she had visited that morning and the results of her walkthrough were virtually the same: a total disregard of the company’s safety guidelines.  Clearly, the supervisors weren’t doing their jobs.

They, of course, didn’t see it that way at all. They were simply working in the most expedient way possible. It was all very well for the bigwigs sitting in their comfortable offices to dream up all these fancy guidelines; they never actually set foot on a worksite, so what did they know about real working conditions? All the deadlines they had to meet, the pressure to be ever more productive. That didn’t leave much time for fiddling about with personal protective equipment, did it?  Anyhow, the scaffolding was solid so what did they need harnesses for? And work gloves slowed them down and made them feel clumsy. As for hard hats, they just caused kinks in their hair.

Laura jotted some final notes on the safety checklist on her clipboard and turned to the young Occupational Health and Safety officer at her side.

“All right, Daniel, that’s it for today. Let’s get back to the office.”

She removed her hard hat and stomped her feet to get the grit off her safety boots before getting into the company car. 

“So, what do you think?” asked Daniel as he joined the flow of traffic with barely a look in the rear view mirror.

Laura resisted the temptation to look back over her shoulder to check the oncoming traffic. She made a mental note to include defensive driving skills in the training.

“There’s definitely a lot of work that needs to be done before people realize that accidents don’t only happen to other people. For every one serious accident that occurs, there are probably another 600 near misses.”

***

“Workers must be able to automatically identify potential hazards as soon as they enter a building site. They must then inform the supervisors and corrective actions have to be taken at once.”

“And is hazard identification covered in the training?” asked Sandra.

“Of course. I’ll send you all the relevant course material this evening for your appraisal.”

“Good. Well, that wraps it up for today, then.”

“OK, I’ll be off now if there’s nothing else you need.”

“No, that’s fine. Oh, hold on a minute. I almost forgot. Hugo wants to go over something with you before you leave.”

Laura’s mouth suddenly felt dry.

“Sure. Where is he?”

“Upstairs, in the boardroom.”

She took the stairs to the top floor, her safety boots squeaking on the marble steps. She felt breathless and she knew it wasn’t exclusively due to exertion.

Her feet sank into the thick carpet as she paused to listen at the door of the wood panelled boardroom. Nothing. Was he alone?

She took a deep breath and knocked. A moment later the door opened and Hugo stood there, his face inscrutable. He stood aside to let her pass, and shut the door behind her. A quick glance round the room confirmed no one else was there, although one end of the large mahogany table was strewn with blue prints, bottles of water and laptops.

Laura placed her shoulder bag on a chair and turned to face Hugo.

“Sandra says you wanted to speak to me?”

Silence.

“Hugo?”

He stared at some fascinating spot on the floor, the muscles of his jaw clenching and unclenching.

“Hugo, is something wrong?” she asked tentatively.

He reached her in two long strides, took her in his arms and
crushed her lips with his own.

Taken unawares, Laura froze for an instant, hands fluttering about his shoulders.

Then she yielded.

He kissed her long and hard until they were both panting when they finally parted.

“You have no idea how I’ve longed for this moment,” he murmured, his pupils dark and dilated.

Laura was unable to speak; she felt sure that Hugo could hear her pounding heart. As he embraced her once more, she pressed her palms against his chest.

“No, Hugo. Someone might come in.”

Reluctantly, he let her go and ran a hand through his short hair. She tucked her shirt back into her jeans and tried to regain her composure. Strands of hair had escaped from her ponytail and she retied it neatly at the base of her neck. Then she reached out and wiped a trace of lipstick from his face with her thumb.

“I’d better go now,” she said thickly, picking up her bag.

“Wait.”  He grasped her hand. “You can’t go yet—we have to talk. Have lunch with me, Laura.”

“No, Hugo, I can’t. Not today. There are things I have to see to.”

He cupped her face with his hand and traced her jawbone with his thumb. “All right. I’ll see you tomorrow, then.”

She gave him a tremulous smile and left the room, closing the door softly behind her. She caught the lift down to the garage in a haze.

I’ve done it,
she thought.
I’ve actually crossed the line Sara warned me about—the point of no return.

And to her surprise, it didn’t cause her much anguish.

***

She spent the rest of the afternoon running around town trying to organize the necessary inspections and licences in order to get their utilities connected. Surprisingly, it had all gone very smoothly and quickly, which only added to her elated mood. As she still had some time to spare, she decided to drop by Sara´s store. To pick out the fabric for the curtains, she told herself. She wouldn’t breathe a word about what had transpired between Hugo and her. Only she was bursting to tell Sara how she felt!  Actually, there’d probably be no need for that; Sara would undoubtedly be able to tell.

“Hey, hon, what a surprise.” Sara sounded pleased as she kissed Laura on both cheeks.

“Hello, Sara. I had some errands to run and I thought I’d drop by for a chat.”

“I’m glad you did. Your order will be arriving tomorrow. Do you want it sent straight to the villa?”

“Oh, yes please. That’s great.  Now all we need to do is decide on the curtains. Can I take the samples home for David to see?”

“Yes, of course. You must be so excited.”

Laura beamed at her.

“Hmm. More than excited. In fact, I’d say that you look positively pleased with yourself.” 

Laura’s grin widened.

“Uh-oh. Something’s up. What is it? Come on, spit it out!”

“What?” asked Laura innocently.

“Don’t you what me.  On Sunday you were obviously going through some sort of existential dilemma, midlife crisis or the like. And unless I’m extremely mistaken, which I never am, a third party is involved. Probably a tall, dark and handsome third-party, am I right?”

“What? Am I that transparent?”

“You are to me. I know you too well. So what’s going on, then?”

“Oh, Sara. It’s nothing really. Just a harmless flirtation at work. But it makes me feel like a teenager again. You know what I mean?”

Sara eyed her shrewdly. “Yeah, I know what you mean,” she answered slowly. “But you do know that you’re playing with fire, don’t you? Because you’re
not
a teenager anymore, and nothing you do is going to change that.”

“I know, I know. But it’s not only that. It’s wonderful to feel appreciated—to have someone who really listens and understands.”

“I thought you already had that—at home.”

“Yeah, well, lately it’s been in short supply.”

“Oh, Laura. Have you thought this thing through? About what you expect to get from this relationship? And about the possible consequences? ”

“I don’t want to think. I’m tired of being responsible and always doing the right thing. I’ve been sensible my whole life and now I just feel like throwing caution to the wind. Just feeling— not thinking!”

“Look, I’m not judging you.  I’ve been there myself. ”

“What?” Laura’s eyes fairly popped out of their sockets. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying? That you had an
affair
?” She wouldn’t have sounded more incredulous if Sara had just announced she’d been abducted by aliens.

“You know little Louisa in our daughters’ class? Her parents got divorced two years ago.”

“So?”

“Well, her dad used to take her to speech therapy sessions on Saturdays—the same ones Mariana used to attend...”

“I don’t believe it! You and Louisa’s dad! What happened? ”

“Well, we got to talking while the girls were having their sessions. You know, sharing our concerns about over daughters’ speech problems. And he was feeling off keel after his divorce and we just clicked. Soon we started going out for coffee while we waited for the girls and then one thing led to another and...well, you know how it is.”

She shrugged her shoulders and held up her palms in a gesture of helplessness, to express the inevitability of the outcome.

“I can’t believe it! Were you in love with him?”

“No, it wasn’t love, although at the time I half believed that it was. It was just an incredible adrenalin rush I thought I would never experience again. I never imagined I would ever be unfaithful to Miguel.”

“My God, neither did I! But how long did it last?”

“A couple of months. Hot, torrid sex at first—but then the novelty wore off and reality set in. The excitement of sneaking around started to turn into a burden and it sort of lost its appeal. We weren’t going anywhere with that relationship, of course, so it sort of fizzled out.”

Laura stared at her friend in amazement. This was not the solid, reliable Sara that she knew—or thought she knew. Talk about still waters running deep!

“Sara, I’d never have believed it if I hadn’t heard it from you.”

“Well, obviously I didn’t plan on it happening and I certainly didn’t want to hurt Miguel, but I found myself thinking: What if I land up regretting not doing this more than actually going for it? When I’m a little old lady will I regret not knowing what the thrill of an illicit affair is like?
And that pretty much eliminated any mental barriers I had left,” she grinned.

Laura shook her head in wonderment. It just went to show that you could never
really
,
truly
know anyone, not even your closest friends and family. Sometimes, out of the blue, people do the most unbelievable things which makes you wonder if they’re acting out of character, or if they’d simply been hiding their true character before.

“I still can’t get my head round this, but I’ve gotta go now. The school bus will be dropping Vanessa off soon. We’ll talk later. ”

A tight embrace and a few giggles later, Laura was on her way home. She arrived in time for the school bus, helped Vanessa with her homework and prepared a roast for dinner as the housekeeper didn’t always have enough time to cook. 
Dona
Maria had, however, already cleaned and polished the villa seeing that all interior work was done. They could now start to move their stuff in. Yet more elation.

By the time David got home from work, Laura looked like she was on a manic high.

“You hopped up on cocaine or something?” he asked her.

“Just feeling rather upbeat and energetic today, that’s all.”

He grinned at her. “Well, in that case, I fully intend to take advantage of that later on.”

“No, Hugo, it’s not an excuse. It was either today and tomorrow, or not for another week. And I don’t want to wait that long to get these conformity inspections out of the way, otherwise we’ll never be able to move into the villa.”

A beat.

“Well, if that’s the way it is, that’s the way it is.”

“But don’t worry, I’ll send you the worksite inspection report this afternoon.”

“Laura, when have you not delivered on time? You know perfectly well that’s not why I’m disappointed.”

“I know, Hugo, but ...listen, I have to go. I have another incoming call. We'll talk on Friday.”

Just as she took the other call, the dogs began barking furiously, indicating someone was at the gate.

“
Senhora
Laura Cruz? Furniture delivery. We are at the gate.”

“Excellent! Just a moment, please.”

She tried to buzz the gate open but it wouldn't budge. She cursed and made a mental note to call the electrician again. Enough fiddling with the wiring—he ought to just replace the PCB because that's probably where the problem lay.

She jogged down the driveway and manually opened the gate. After the truck had passed through, she tested the mechanism with her remote control. The gate immediately glided open. How infuriating! It was so unreliable—you never knew whether it would work or not.

As she jogged back up the driveway, she whistled shrilly to the dogs to get them to shut up. They were not pleased about not being able to vet the unknown vehicle and its occupants.

Feeling like a little kid in a candy store, Laura instructed the three men where to place all the furniture they had bought.  She felt pleased; the move would actually be quite easy as they’d only have to lug their personal items and clothing to the villa. All the heavy, bulky items were new and their old stuff would remain in the guest cottage.

Once the men were gone,
Dona
Maria gave the new furniture the once over with her duster before carting over the linen and crockery from the cottage. The rest of the day was spent organising shelves and drawers and receiving the various technicians who came to do the utility conformity checks.

That done, she went down to the barn and was pleased to see that
Senhor
Manuel and his men were making headway with the renovation. Only the elusive electrician said that he would not be able to come round before Friday.

***

“Thanks for picking Mariana up; it saves me the drive. Not that that we’re too busy for me to go myself,” said Sara ruefully, “but at least I can save on petrol.”

“Not a problem. I wanted to return the fabric samples. We’ve finally made up our minds. Let me show you.”

“Girls, mind you don’t knock anything over,” warned Sara as the girls chased each other excitedly round the store.

“Here, take my iPad and sit down over there while Auntie Sara and I have a little chat.”

“Thank you, Auntie Laura. When can Vanessa sleep over at our house?”

“We’ll see,” smiled Laura at the little girl.

Sara shoed her daughter away and turned to Laura.

“Why
doesn’t
Vanessa ever want to sleep over? She knows us so well now.”

Laura hesitated a minute.

“Well, you know about her nightmares, don’t you? We’re always afraid she’ll have one and I won’t be there for her. ”

“But she doesn’t have them that often, and anyway I’m sure we could deal with it,” Sara reassured her friend.

“Actually, there’s another issue I haven’t told you about,” said Laura, lowering her voice. “Vanessa occasionally has accidents as well.”

“Accidents? You mean she wets her bed?”

“Yes.” Laura looked crestfallen. “We have to get her up in the middle of the night, or more often than not she’ll wet the bed and not even wake up.”

“Oh, poor lamb. But it’s nothing to worry about. My nephew had the same problem till he was eight, and then it just resolved by itself. Kids grow out of these things.”

“I know, but I feel so sorry for her. She’s always devastated when I have to change her in the middle of the night.”

“Poor baby.”

“Sara, don’t mention any of this to Mariana, will you? If it gets round at school…. Well, you know how cruel kids can be.”

“Of course I won’t, don’t worry. Talking of which, have you seen the latest email from the BusyBody Brigade? About the school play?”

“No, what bright idea have they come up with this time?” inquired Laura.

“Helena says that her darling little daughter isn’t happy with the role she’s playing, nor the costumes the teacher has designated for the class.”

“Well, isn’t that just devastating. And she’s going to do something about it, no doubt.”

Sara snorted. “But of course. She has come up with ideas for new costumes and alterations to the roles.”

“And the rest of us, including the teacher, have to salute and obey. Can’t she see how rude and presumptuous it is to constantly override the teacher’s plans?” Laura asked incredulously. “And am I right in assuming that Carla and Susana have dutifully backed her up?”

“Bingo!” laughed Sara. “Devout minions that they are. But I don’t recall nominating her coordinator of the year 1 parents, do you?”

Laura sighed. “Being involved in your children’s schooling is one thing, and meddling is another.”

“Yeah, I hate being bossed around by busybodies who have nothing better to do. And I may well tell them so at the meeting tomorrow.”

“What meeting?” asked Laura.

“They’ve called a parent meeting for tomorrow. To give us our orders, no doubt.”

Laura replied with a world-class eye roll.

***

Having put Vanessa to bed early, Laura headed to the sitting room while David worked out in the home gym. She flopped into an armchair with her laptop and finally alone, her thoughts turned to work—and consequently, to Hugo. She’d deliberately been pushing thoughts of him out of her mind. But now she had work to get on with and so there was no avoiding it any longer.

What if she did get involved with him? What would the fallout be? How did she really feel about him? And about David? She pondered these questions while she opened the files pertaining to her current project at Delta.  She toggled between the documents, staring sightlessly at them. It was no use, she couldn’t concentrate. Procrastinating, she accessed her email. Six new messages. One name jumped out at her.

Hugo Avelar.

Her stomach tightened. She hesitated briefly before clicking on the message. His words filled the screen, picking up where he’d left off:

Laura,

I hope you aren’t angry but I don’t want to pretend anymore. Can we talk?

H

“What’s happening tomorrow? Are you going in to the office?” David asked, coming up behind her with his face towel dangling round his neck.  

Caught unawares, Laura jumped and hastily closed her laptop. She could feel her face flushing and a pulse beating frantically in her neck. She turned and looked back over her shoulder at him.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, with a frown on his face.

“Nothing. You startled me, that’s all.”

“Something I shouldn’t see?” he asked, coming round the armchair to stand in front of her.

“Don’t be silly,” she said, trying for an amused laugh but not quite pulling it off. Her fingers gripped the laptop tightly.

He stared thoughtfully down at her, his lips pursed.

“No, I’m not going in tomorrow. I’m working at home because the utility people are coming and I’d better be here in case there are any glitches. Also, there’s a meeting at school that I should probably attend.”

“Anything wrong?”

“No, it’s just that the busybodies are trying to hijack the end of term show the kids are putting on.”

He nodded.

“Shall I take Vanessa to school?”

“No, that’s all right, I’ll take her myself. There’s no need for her to get up so early.” 

“All right then. I’m going to bed.”

“I’ll be along later. I still have some things I need to do.”

He gave her a long, searching look before turning on his heel and heading for the bathroom. Laura let her breath out slowly and closed her eyes.