The Accidental Familiar (Accidentally Paranormal Series Book 14) (19 page)

Nina fist-bumped Calamity and winked, her grin wide. “You called it, you pain in my ass.”

Rick scooted forward on the couch, steepling his hands under his chin. “So my magic is stronger when I’m with Poppy. The question is, how do we control it so she’s not turning me into something you’d find in the Home Depot garden center?”

Looking down at her hands, Poppy nodded. “Yeah. I think some control might be in order. That was probably the scariest half hour of my life. Though I won’t deny, it
was
a little cool. So how do I get a grip on this and keep from hurting someone?”

January gave her another one of those soothing smiles. “We teach you, of course. We teach both of you to harness your energy as a duo and manage it.”

Yeah. Just like Batman and Robin. Rick surely would be up for harnessing the magic he hated as a team, right?

“So what do we do until then, January? How do we figure out who this malevolent aura is and how do we stop it?” Wanda asked, threading her arm through Arch’s.

“If only I had the answer. First, we need to identify it and find out if it’s personal or some misguided spirit with a grudge.”

“Of course it’s personal. It launched me into the woods,” Poppy reminded, twisting her clammy hands together.

“That’s not what I mean, Poppy. What I mean is the act itself. Could be the anger this aura is presenting has nothing to do with you and everything to do with simply lashing out.”

“So maybe someone doesn’t necessarily want
me
dead—just a death in general?” Still, to think this aura was attached to her had Poppy far more freaked out than anything that had happened since this all began.

January blew out a breath of air, her lean cheeks puffing outward. “Maybe. But that doesn’t feel right. I know it’s scary, but the attack
does
feel aimed at you. However, if you can’t think of anyone who wishes you ill, the scenario of a temper tantrum, revenge with no care for collateral damage, does fit. But that this aura also wants death, whether that’s aimed at you personally or not, it’s still death.”

Poppy gulped, wiping her clammy hands on her thighs. “Okay, so here’s an outlandish thought, why don’t you witches and your magic spells and incantations call this thing up? Like, ‘Hey in there! Come out, come out wherever you are and stop beating up Poppy! What’d she ever do to you?’ You know, like a good old-fashioned exorcism?”

Calamity scoffed, her whiskers bobbing. “Because we don’t summon spirits, Poppy-Seed. Or at least neither January nor I do. And you’re not freakin’ possessed. It’s not the same as having an aura haunt yours. Auras are slippery sumbitches. They attach themselves to you and hook their claws into your soul.”

“If you two can’t do an incantation to summon this, we could still damn well put in an emergency call to Familiar Central and tell them about it, couldn’t we?” Rick asked, his anger clearly bubbling just below the surface. “We could get someone here who does specialize in it. As in pronto.”

January rolled her eyes as though he were crazy. “Rick, you know what this time of year is like without the blood moon. But with the blood moon upon us? Where are we going to find someone to identify an aura when it’s all hands on deck at every portal?”

“Portal?” Poppy squeaked. God, there was so much to learn. Portals and auras and double magic and fate. She was quite suddenly more overwhelmed than she’d been so far in this process.

Rick folded his hands in front of him and gave a curt nod. “Yes, portals. There are many. Some lead to good places, some to not-so-good places. As I mentioned, the blood moon thins the veil and opens up this world to evil from other planes. Everyone who has even a modicum of power is going to be in combat mode come Halloween.”

Poppy had this image of ghosts flying around in a midnight sky, circling for their prey. Sort of like Ghostbusters, but maybe less jokey.

“Okay, so we wait until after Halloween to call Familiar Central and rid me of this aura. It’s not far off. We just watch out for bad auras, right?”

No big deal. Just watch for totally invisible entities.

“To be safe, until we can get some answers, I’m going to do a protection spell on you, Poppy. I don’t know the strength of the aura. I might not be the strongest witch, but I’m no weakling.”

Yes! Yes, a protection spell, a whatever spell. Whatever would help, Poppy was down for.

Clapping her hands on her legs, she rose, ready to attack this and move on to the next problem. “Okay, so what do I do? Do I have to gather moths’ wings? Do we need a cauldron with bubbling green goo? Frogs? Oh, please don’t say frogs. I love frogs. They have those cute little legs and beady little eyes. I had a pond behind me where I lived when I was a kid, and I’d die if we had to sacrifice a frog.”

Both January and Rick barked a laugh. “No frogs,” January reassured. Rising from the armchair, she approached Archibald and gave him a quick hug. “So, Arch? Got some raspberry Kool-Aid?”

* * * *

“Kool-Aid? Like for real, the kid is gonna drink a frickin’ metaphor?” Nina asked, her dark eyes skeptical.

January chuckled. “For real, Vampire. It’s just to hide the taste of the spell, but it works every time.”

January pulled a packet from her medical bag containing a powdery substance and dumped it into the glass of dark pink liquid. With her index finger, she made the water swirl until it was a deep vortex of color.

The good doctor’s calming tones, her honesty about this aura haunting her, her soothing nature, all served to calm Poppy. She didn’t doubt January was a solid therapist, and when all was said and done, when things had evened out a bit and her world wasn’t so filled with chaos, she planned to make an appointment with her.

Until then, Poppy prayed this protection spell would do the trick, and she was going in with total trust. Whatever it took to rid herself of the evil attached to her.

Closing her eyes, January squared her shoulders and said, “Spirits know this, know this well, protect Poppy with this spell. Harm be hindered, chaos be gone, keep her safe from dusk till dawn!” She let her hand fly open, her palm over the glass, before she removed it with flourish and snapped her fingers.

The pink water hissed and bubbled momentarily, creating a white froth. As quickly as the liquid stirred, it also calmed, eventually going still. The doctor opened her eyes and smiled at Poppy and pointed to the glass. “Chugalug, baby.”

Nina, Marty, and Wanda, along with sweet-sweet Carl, pounded their fists on the kitchen island like they were all in college and sang out, “Drink! Drink! Drink!”

Laughing, Poppy lifted the cup to her lips and threw it back, guzzling the drink until it was gone while everyone cheered—even the very proper Arch.

The moment she finished, she stuck her tongue out, scraping her knuckles over it with a gag. “Gah! That’s awful! What is that?”

Rick leaned down and whispered in her ear, “Goats’ eyeballs. Dried, of course, and maybe some virgins’ tears. I hear those are very powerful.”

Nudging him in the ribs, Poppy giggled. “You better shut—”

Those were the last words to exit her mouth.

What came out after that was her dinner, on a hot, acidic spew of liquid, spraying from her mouth like a fountain.

Her belly protested the contents being ripped from her, heaving and rolling with acrid swells. Leaning forward, Poppy gasped on a sharp intake of breath and wrapped her hands around her waist as a white-hot flash of electricity zigzagged through her, making beads of sweat pop out on her forehead.

Her eyes went wide in panic and fear. She couldn’t speak. She couldn’t ask for help. She couldn’t do anything but fight a scream from the agonizing pain rising from her stomach and lodging in her chest.

The lights in the shed flickered, the small chandelier over the entryway swaying so hard, the sheetrock began to pull away from the ceiling. The floor beneath them rumbled, at first distantly, then growing louder as it picked up steam, crashing in her ears, matching the pounding tide of her pulse.

And with that, Poppy heaved again, this time her stomach almost turning itself inside out, the violent hacking stealing her breath.

She fell forward toward the island countertop, almost cracking her head but for Carl, who threw himself in front of her, gripping her shoulders as she dropped against him, unable to get her legs beneath her.

His awkward, stiff arms went around her immediately as her face cracked against his thin chest. “Popp-yy!” he stammered, the alarm in his voice crystal clear.

She heard Nina yelp, “What the fuck is going on, Doc? What the hell did you give her?”

And then Marty screamed, “What in the living hell is
that
?”

Poppy wanted to look up. She wanted to know what the hell
that
was, too. She wanted to know why there was a hint of terror in Marty’s voice, but she couldn’t because whatever had rooted in her gut was now screeching from her mouth.

Her head fell back on her shoulders as Rick grabbed for her from behind, his strong hands supporting her helpless form. Her throat began to swell like a balloon until she thought surely her skin would split, her legs going rigid, the muscles so tense, they were sure to snap.

And then she retched, retched like no college coed before, her mouth opening so wide, it was as though someone had pried it open with a crowbar. A taste so foul, so ungodly, flew from her throat, and she was helpless to stop the coming wave.

“Help her, for Goddess’s sake!” Rick shouted, his voice hoarse and cracked, his grip on her tight as her body shook until she swore she heard her bones rattle.

Vaguely, she heard January and Calamity begin to chant as the shed shook and shuddered, rocking and lifting with creaky groans. “Evil be gone, we refute your hold! Evil leave us, no longer so bold!”

More hands were on her as Rick continued to hold her from behind, rocking back and forth when she collapsed against his chest, whispering soothing words.

Whatever they’d done, whatever those words evoked, the evil clearly did not have its cooperative pants on today, because everything just became worse.

A low hum, like a transformer sizzling before it blows, began an upward climb of noise, tearing at Poppy’s ears until the sound was all she could hear.

It whirled in her eardrums, pounding, ripping, punching its way to a frenzy, clawing at her, pulling her from Rick’s arms until, in a whoosh of air, it lifted her upward…

The intent obvious—crush her against the ceiling.

Everything happened in slow motion, the weightlessness of her limbs, her awareness that if she didn’t do something to stop this, she’d end up embedded in the sheetrock above her, the notion that whatever had a hold on her left her feeling dirty and ashamed.

“
By all that is mine, I order thou to release!
” Rick roared, so loud the shed reverberated with his demand.

“Arch! Look out!” Poppy heard Wanda cry out in distress before there was a loud thunk of what sounded like body-to-body contact and Nina was screaming, “I got her!”

Then she was falling, her limbs thrashing, her stomach dropping in similar fashion to that of riding a roller coaster. Arms caught her, the strength of them secure and comforting in their capture.

Nina grunted in her ear as they fell to the floor in a heap, knocking the wind out of her.

Rick’s was the first face she saw, his eyes masked in worry. Pulling her upward, he enveloped her in his arms, the scent of his cologne settling in her nose as he pressed his lips to the top of her head. “Jesus, Poppy. Are you okay?”

Her head fell back, limp and dizzy, but she managed a nod, her stomach hot with the ache of vomiting. “I think my intestines need to be stuffed back into my body. Is that a thing? I mean, can that actually be done? Somebody call the witch proctologist.”

His laughter slithered into her ears, almost making her smile, except her lips felt like someone had taken a shoehorn to them and stretched them out. “I think you still have your intestines. I don’t know how that’s possible after what just happened, but I think you’re good.”

She wanted to struggle out of his embrace, certain it was inappropriate, and January would report back to the powers that be that she was a dirty-dirty whore, but she had nothing left.

It had all flown out of her mouth.

“Give her to me, Rick,” January demanded, pulling Poppy from Rick’s embrace and saving her the embarrassment of a weak show of feministic strength. “Poppy, oh Goddess! Are you okay?”

As the doctor’s face came into focus, her hair wild about her face, her glasses cracked, Poppy forced a smile. “Duh. I just puked a demon. I think the purge is complete. What’s not okay about that?”

“Fuck, you’re GD awesome!” Nina crowed, looking down at her with a hint of admiration in her eyes.

“Is everyone okay? Carl? Archibald?” Poppy asked, attempting to sit up, only to be settled back against January with a gentle hand.

January patted her shoulder with a light touch. “Everyone’s fine. Just catch your breath.”

Calamity scampered near her head, pressing a paw to her cheek, making a clucking noise. “I’m sorry. I suck the ass of an elephant for getting you into this, Poppy-Seed. I’m the crappiest of crap. But I’m gonna tell ya the truth. We got big trouble.”

January bit the inside of her cheek, enforcing Calamity’s claim. “She’s right. We got trouble.”

“Should I have a scotch in hand when you define ‘big trouble’?”

Marty and Wanda helped January lift Poppy to her feet and brought her to the couch, where Rick plumped a shredded pillow behind her.

But Poppy waved them away. “Don’t fuss over me, just tell me what big trouble is.”

The silence to follow was deafening.

“I’m not hearing an answer.”

January knelt in front of her and took her hands. “The aura I told you about—the malevolent one? That’s what you vomited.”

She searched January’s eyes, not understanding the fear she read in them. “But that’s good, right? Rick told it to let go and it did. So all gone, no? Sort of like an exorcism.”

January shook her head, gripping her fingers. “No. It’s not all gone. That was only a taste of what it’s capable of. My protection spell should have at least kept this thing at bay. But it broke through the spell, Poppy. I’ve never seen that happen before.”