Surviving Seduction (19 page)

Now he reached down her shirt, holding her tightly against the wal , and this time, when his hand ran over her breast, he squeezed. She moaned against his lips, clutching at his shoulders.

Soon, he had unbuttoned her jeans, and he slid his hand around to grip the back of them, using his strength to hold her in place and pul them down. When she was bare, he brought both hands around to squeeze her. His kiss never faltered.

Then his hand glided to her front and slid down purposeful y between her legs. She cried out softly, but the sound was smothered by his relentless lips, and as her body shuddered against his touch, he held her in place.

He was adamantly restricting her body, and the air wasn’t moving through her lungs fast enough. She was trapped between two wal s, and felt the beginnings of panic weaving its way into the electrifying pleasure.

Selena was shocked to find herself on the edge of one of her attacks, but as he released her just long enough to pul her pants off completely, her discomfort found a plateau. For the moment, she could breathe, but she couldn’t expect it to last.

Now she was naked from the waist down, but he left her shirt where it was, hanging off her shoulders just so the swel of her breasts could be seen. He tugged his own shirt off efficiently, and moved against her again, more firmly than before. She focused on breathing deeply as he freed himself. Then she was being lifted off the ground so her face was level with his. Her legs wrapped around him instinctively.

He began kissing her again, more passionately, and the heat radiating off his skin enveloped her. He pinned her more tightly than ever as he found her opening. Her panic began to grow again, and she fought to control it, until she realized that she was not
in
control at al . She was surrounded by wal s, pressed against one in a suffocating cloud of hot air, unable even to stand, and Dan had trapped her lips and her body with his own. Now, even the space inside her was being slowly, tenaciously taken, but for a moment, the intimate sensation of him fil ing her was enough to block out her awareness of anything else.

It was both lust and love that he assailed her with, and his emotions were as overwhelming as his body. She had never told him about her panic attacks, and he wasn’t doing anything different or wrong. In fact, he was doing everything right. The problem was in her mind. Neither her heart nor her body was at odds with what was happening.

She couldn’t fight her feelings. She couldn’t fight his and didn’t want to. There was only one thing she could do, and that was to surrender to him and to her own needs.

She pul ed her face away to gasp for the air that she needed as he thrust inside her, and his deep kisses turned to her neck. Everything he was doing felt so good, and she wanted him too. She loved him. She wouldn’t let herself ruin this, and forced her mind to focus on the hard warmth that surrounded and fil ed her. She concentrated on his strength and his need for her, on his gentle but powerful touch, on the strain of his emotions as he seemed to wil her to feel them through his body – as though he wanted to reach her very soul. He grasped her breast and returned his mouth to hers, moving inevitably inside her as if to say, “I want everything that you are.”

His intensity was scorching, and she answered by pushing at him. He pushed back. There was no separating him from what he desired. Not now. He would tolerate no space between them. That was the way it was going to be, so she dug her nails into his back without knowing it. Her tense frustration laced the delicious sensations with a sharper focus until she was locked in a delirium of oppressive pleasure as he thrust his way inevitably deeper inside her.

She moaned, and al her feelings were in the sound.

He eagerly kissed her again, and she felt as though he understood. She felt, for one moment, as though he were just as helpless to his desire as she was. So she held his face in her hands and squeezed her legs more tightly around him. His thrusts grew quicker, and she began to climax. He felt it, and only then drew her away from the wal .

When they came together, Dan was standing in their dim cabin with Selena wrapped around him, and she could feel nothing but his body and the warm air that surrounded them.

Selena marveled at the hefty horse that Bear sat upon. She’d ridden with him only once before, when they’d journeyed out to wage war on Josie’s late brother Jake and his gang of bandits, but the situation was so distracting that she hadn’t had a chance to marvel at the animal’s strength.

Now that they were on a peaceful trip back to the Grazers, she could observe as much as she cared to. Bear was a big man, built with a good deal of both muscle and fat, but his furry-footed mount looked surprisingly comfortable under the weight.

Josie rode at his side.

“The cows are in good shape because we’ve gathered them from al over,” she explained, “But you know how hard it is to get ahold of new blood with horses. You’re lucky to have such a nice col ection for such a smal group.

We’ve only got one horse for every three people but you al have
more
horses than people.”

“It took a lot of work, make no mistake,” Bear said.

“It’s been getting harder too. I was starting to worry about inbreeding. Glad you showed up when you did.”

“Wel it’l be interesting to mix them, or maybe trade them back and forth?”

“As far as trading, I don’t know. Ours are special y trained. I’d like to train yours; I’m just not sure about sending ours out for use. At least not until I know how they’re treated, no offense.”

“None taken,” Josie said with a bright smile. “You’l see for yourself when you get there, but I can tel you, we worship our horses. Everything depends on them, so we do our best to spoil ‘em rotten. We’d feed ‘em our own steak if it was good for them, and then
we’d
eat the grass instead!”

Bear laughed, wagging his head.

“They’re getting along better than I’d expected,” Ben murmured so that only Selena could hear. “What with her brother having murdered his, and al .”

Selena glanced ahead nervously, worried about being overheard. “He knows she’s got nothing to do with Jake’s insanity,” she whispered back with a wary glance at Angela. Thanks to Selena’s il ness, she hadn’t seen much of the girl, who now rode just behind Josie and Bear, no doubt watching Dan, who set the pace at the front with Cal.

She stil got red-faced whenever he was anywhere nearby.

In the hopes that Ben would stop whispering, she changed the subject and spoke at a normal volume. “So why did you want to come along on this trip?” She’d been surprised when she’d found him saddled and ready to go, but didn’t get a chance to ask. It had al happened pretty quickly and they left the morning after Jack did. She wondered if they would overtake the wagon, but since the Grazers had come in from the north, Dan opted for a southern route so he could show her the lay of the land in that direction. It would take a little longer, but everyone seemed in high spirits.

“Boredom,” Ben answered.

She glanced at him speculatively. “You don’t look any less bored.”

“Wel you should hope I get a little entertainment out of this so I don’t turn around and go home. Then who would you have these electrifying conversations with?”

Selena snorted.

“And what made you want to wear normal clothes?”

he countered.

“They were a gift,” she muttered. Today she’d tried the dark green tank. She didn’t like that the blue of the jeans wouldn’t blend in with the ground or the trees, but she’d found them comfortable enough that she wanted to try them out on this trip.

Ben snickered playful y at her awkwardness. “Wel , it looks pretty hot. Not that the usual isn’t sexy in a cave-girl sort of way.”

“I do not look like a cave girl!” Selena cried indignantly, much louder than intended. She clapped a hand over her mouth too late.

She glanced ahead at the others with

embarrassment. Dan actual y reined around so he could glance back at them before a low laugh escaped him. Cal joined him unabashedly.

Selena suddenly found it difficult to keep from smiling herself, but she stifled it to make a face at Ben. He looked especial y proud, because getting a laugh out of Dan was so rare. In fact, he and Cal continued to chuckle for a while before final y regaining their composure.

“I hate you,” she informed Ben with a lopsided smile.

“That hurts,” he told her dramatical y.

She observed that both Josie and Bear had politely kept quiet before resuming their discussion, but she did get a curious glance from Angela.

Selena was almost used to these but suffered a spike of anxiousness at the thought of being surrounded by stares again when they rejoined the Grazers. Perhaps she’d fit in better with salvaged clothes. She was relieved to be on the move again, and free from her little attacks, but even this enjoyment was dampened by the fact that they were riding through an unfamiliar forest. She’d felt the same way on her hunting trip with Shane but had been so desperate to travel that it had been easier to ignore.

Selena frowned and wished Jack had given her the compass instead of that damned magnifying glass. She’d handed it over to Shane after Jack left and then spent the rest of the day finishing the last pair of pants. They were neatly bundled in her pack and she planned to make the final exchange as soon as they arrived, assuming Jack was there.

Her thoughts returned to him and churned around his potent flattery and mischievously fearless attitude. She found herself wondering again why he was so unafraid of Dan and why he hadn’t bothered to hide his interest in her.

Selena fought off the little bubbling feelings of enjoyment that surfaced while she considered these things.

He was just so open and direct, aside from what his intentions might have been with the alcohol the other night.

She imagined it would be quite nice to be with someone who spoke their thoughts and expressed their feelings so freely. Then again, she couldn’t blame Dan for keeping things close to the chest. He was who he was, and the mystery of him was always al uring, but she couldn’t help imagining the reprieve that she’d feel if she were free from al the guessing.

As for Jack’s fearlessness, he’d seemed very confident in his ability to throw a knife, but he just didn’t behave like a fighter. He didn’t move the way Dan did; the way Jake had. Then again, what did she know about these things? He could have skil s she’d never heard of. So Jack likely had some mysteries of his own. She hadn’t known him long, after al , and she’d been so busy dodging his questions that she never bothered to ask him any.

Selena looked up at the sky. Most of it was obscured by the treetops, but what she could see was pure blue. It was so much harder to know where the sun was in relation to the land, thanks to the trees. She longed for that compass again.

What else was she going to do there but trade with Jack, she wondered sul enly, knowing that he wouldn’t make it easy on her. Dan would be busy negotiating with Josie, no doubt. Bear would run straight for the Grazers’

livestock, and Cal straight for Amy. At least she’d have Ben to keep her company.

When they reached the edge of the trees they were stil in the hil s. It had taken four ful days of uneventful travel to get there and the sun was low when they gazed out over the wide open plains that sprawled out below them. Selena final y felt her burden ease completely. Below was land she’d passed through before she’d ever met the company she was in now.

The sun was warm and cast an orange glow on the sights before them. Selena knew that the rest of the journey would be much quicker since they didn’t need to pick a careful path anymore. Now that she was in a familiar setting, Selena could afford to be impressed with Dan and Cal’s knowledge of the lay of the land.

They’d emerged on the highest of the hil s, which afforded the best view of the surrounding miles. Beautiful grazing land did indeed lie to the southeast, just as Dan had promised. In fact, they could see the dust cloud of Josie’s herd, southwest of where the Grazers were camped.

“Any of you bring binoculars?” Bear’s deep voice inquired.

Cal reached back into his saddlebag first and pul ed out his pair, handing them over.

“Would you look at that,” Bear breathed.

Selena urged Star forward to see a distant muddle of black and white in the distance. When she brought her own binoculars to her eyes, she had to smile.

“Zebra,” Bear announced.

A herd of about seven were grazing in the grassy fields below, although she couldn’t be sure about her count because it was hard to tel where one animal ended and the other began.

They watched the animals for a while. No one else was quite as impressed as Bear. Because the rest of them were young, they were al more accustomed to seeing animals that had once been considered out of place. When the Crash was unfolding, a myriad of species were simply abandoned and some set free from various zoos. Selena hadn’t run into any unusual predators, just the local cougars, coyotes, and the occasional black bear, but for al she knew, there could be lions, tigers and hyenas wandering around. Her parents had given Selena her only comfort on this subject when they once told her that you would hear most of these predators in the area long before you’d see them. So far, she hadn’t, and she understood that they didn’t general y prefer to dine on humans, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t cautious and alert at al times.

“Should we round them up?” Josie asked with an adventurous glint in her eyes.

“Only if you want to eat them,” Bear answered distantly, absorbed with studying the animals.

“Oh no,” Josie said, shaking her head. “I couldn’t. I mean, I could, but we’re not starving.”

Bear nodded, “From what I remember, they aren’t much for riding, or for using as pack animals. Got a wild disposition that’s real y hard to shake. You’re better off sticking to horses.”

“Like I mentioned, we’re short on those. Seems a waste not to try to use these.”

“Until some kneecaps and heads get kicked in,”

Bear pointed out. “Real y, I’d leave ‘em alone.”