Surrender To You (5 page)

“You were right,” he interrupted. “Told me last night that she’d written it all down and had it all set to go as soon as…”

As soon as she’d found out she was dying.
 

Yeah, I wouldn’t want to finish that sentence either.

“I wish she would have told you her plans,” I whispered. “I didn’t mean to upset you guys yesterday.”

“Not your fault.”

There wasn’t much else I could say, his curt replies hurting me even though I knew he grieved for his mother.
 
“I’ll be there.”

He hung up without responding, which I completely deserved.

I’d never done well with death. To me, it was just the end of a natural cycle. I’d always been a private person and crying in front of others wasn’t something I would do. I felt awkward at emotional times because I never appeared to ‘react the right way’ which had been one of the big issues after the ‘incident’ as I liked to call it now.

Letting out a breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding, I dialed my boss to let him know I wouldn’t be back to work until mid-week.

~*~

The day of the funeral came, foggy with cloudy skies. We all stood outside with our jackets on, umbrellas nearby in case it rained surrounding the casket as the ceremony progressed.

I stood next to my mother, who wept into a tissue and had her arm around me as if I were the one who needed the comfort.

Stefan stood on the other side, surrounded by his siblings as they all huddled together, arms around one another. I couldn’t see his face as he was rather focused on the casket in front of us.

Liliana’s wishes were to be buried at the local cemetery. Her ex-husband, Richard, stood next to his children with a stony look on his face. Yvette had moved a little earlier to stand next to him, and they murmured a bit. Or rather, she did most of the talking. He kept shaking his head and she just looked more pissed off by the minute.

As the ceremony ended, everyone started to leave and I looked over to Stefan, only to have Yvette suddenly blocking my view.

“I can’t believe you actually bothered to show your face here, you couldn’t even stay to help the other day!”

I took a step backward as my mother stepped in front of me.

“Your momma would be ashamed that you’re being so disrespectful at her service. This is not the place.”

She laughed, her eyes glaring daggers at me.

“Doesn’t anybody ever tell you off? You’re such a selfish bitch and I’m so glad you ran my brother off.”

“What is your problem?” I hissed back at her, trying to lower the general volume of the conversation to avoid attracting Stefan’s attention. “And you got it all wrong. He walked out.”

“Yeah, after
you
pushed him away. What did you do while he’d gone abroad huh? Did you just scheme your way into our mom’s life so she’d leave you the house? Then decided to make him leave you since you got what you wanted?”

Jerking my head back, my eyes flew to my mothers that were also filled with shock.

“What the hell are you talking about? I didn’t do anything to your mother and I certainly didn’t know she left me the house!”

Richard stepped over and grabbed Yvette’s arm, tugging on it.

“Walk away, Yvette. You’re making a fool of yourself,” he told her with a nod in my direction. “My apologies, Elizabeth.”

Yvette threw a final frown at me before stalking off, leaving me bewildered by the news and her attitude. Her father shook his head in annoyance as I stared at him.

“Why in the world did Liliana leave me the house?”

Richard shifted his weight, uncomfortable as he took my hand in his.

“Liliana…she was adamant that you needed a place to call home. I tried to convince her that she’d anger the kids but the only one who seems mad at her decision is Yvette. Elizabeth…she loved you and I promise you, I’m all for you having the house. She and I have always been friendly…” He trailed off and glanced over at my mom as he stopped.

Oh. I see. He knew my secret. But why had Lily told him and not Stefan?

He must have seen the question in my eyes.

“She always said that you’d do the right thing eventually. That when you did and things worked out with Stefan…”

I shook my head. “I don’t think that will happen, but I appreciate it. Does Yvette want the house, because she can—”

He cut me off. “No, sadly, she can’t. The terms were that you get the house, or it goes up for sale and the proceeds go to Liliana’s favorite charity. So don’t let her convince you otherwise because all the kids signed off on it.”

“Why would she sign off if she wanted it?”

“Her mother threatened to cut her off. She just wants something to bitch about, I guess.”

“She just doesn’t want me to have it, you mean.”

He smiled sheepishly. “Yes, but don’t let that stop you. You’ll be sent the paperwork to sign off on. You should take it to a lawyer. Assuming, that is, that you don’t want to sell it?”

At that, my mother piped up. “Don’t be silly, Richard! Of course she doesn’t want to sell Liliana’s house.”

As he nodded, she looked over at me. “We’ll talk later. I’m gonna walk Richard to his car. You should…”

Jerking her head in Stefan’s direction, my mother put her arm on Richard’s and they walked away.

I stood rooted to my spot, watching as Stefan stood near the grave, alone.

Wanting to go to him, but not. Wanting to kiss him, yet unable to gather up to courage to do so.

He must have felt my eyes on him, glancing up and staring straight at me.

In that moment, I knew that Stefan wanted me and it would never change. The hungry stare on his face, in his eyes, and in his stance said it all.

He considered me his. He loved me and always had. I’d been the blind one, foolish enough to let my fears tear me away from the people who had done nothing but care about me. If I talked to him, he’d try to make me stay.

Especially now that his mother had given me her house.

I didn’t know how to feel. I wanted him and yet, I didn’t. Going back wasn’t possible. You couldn’t undo the past. And the look in his eyes terrified me. Because I recognized it. The look same as the one he wore in my dreams, even as he denied me with his every breath.

But it wasn’t him denying me. I did that to myself.

And when he smiled at me, I knew that he knew my thoughts, which only alarmed me even more.
 

So I did what I always did best. I nodded at him, turned around and walked away to take the first flight home.

CHAPTER FIVE

Putting my bag down just inside the door, I kicked off my heels and walked toward the kitchen to pour myself something to drink.

Work was exhausting, but it’d been a week since I’d gotten back and I was more grateful than ever for the way it kept me busy.

Too busy to think, too busy to wonder where Stefan was and what he was doing.

Well, until I got home, where he entered my mind the moment I walked in my door apparently.

Sighing, I quickly stripped off my shirt and walked toward the bedroom. I’d get a drink once I got into something more comfortable since I didn’t plan on getting off my couch until bedtime.

Putting on a tank top and some soft pajama pants, I was heading back to the kitchen when a loud knock came at my door.

“Just a second!” I yelled. The knocker didn’t answer so I played it safe. Upon reaching the door, I looked through the peephole and gasped.

Swinging my door open, I glared at a soaking wet and quite angry-looking Stefan standing on my doorstep.

Giving my head a little shake to prepare myself, I breathed deeply, still glaring and asked, “What in hell are you doing here? And how did you get my address?”

“It was on your luggage tags, Miss Brilliant,” he retorted. “Are you going to let me in so I can dry off?”

I stepped back. I knew he wasn’t going to go anywhere and I didn’t think I could handle his hands on me right now.

Shutting the door as he walked past me and into my front entryway, I couldn’t help but stare at his back. The white button down shirt, thanks to the rain, had gone completely transparent and his equally wet jeans sculpted to his body like nothing I’d ever seen on him before. I had to refrain from licking my lips, fearing it would mess up the scowl I kept on my face when he was around.

Call it a defense mechanism, but if he knew how much he turned me on with the mere sight of him, he’d take advantage of that and I’d be screwed all over again. Literally.

Grinning at my unintended pun, I let out a giggle and he whirled around to face me with heat in his gaze.

“What’s so damn funny?”

“You…You look like a drowned animal,” I lied. “It’s hilarious. I’ve never seen you so less put together.”

He stalked up to me then and got in my face.

“I’m not amused. You literally left hours after the funeral. What the fuck is wrong with you?”

Oh, shit. I wiped the grin from my face and glared up at him defiantly. “I was done there and I had a job to get back to. If you don’t like how I deal with my grief, you can go to hell!”

Oh, yeah and I wanted to get away from you and your intense stare before I let it convince me to strip naked for you.
I didn’t dare say that out loud.

“I’m already in hell, Ellie. You didn’t stay, so I’ve come to you because I want answers.”

My face heated, the intensity of his stare making me drop my eyes even though I knew I shouldn’t. “Well,” I steeled myself, squaring my shoulders. “You can’t have them! Why are you even here? Don’t you have a job or something?”

“Bullshit. I took time off, I had it coming to me. And I already told you why I’m here,” he growled. “Dammit, can’t I have a fucking towel or something?”

Grateful for the opportunity to walk away, I opened the hallway cabinet and pulled out a towel. Re-entering the living room, I stopped short at the sight of Stefan’s bare chest. He used his shirt to try and rub his head dry and the muscles in his arm held me transfixed. And his chest… he wasn’t ripped, but I didn’t see an ounce of fat anywhere.

Who was this buff man? I guess I should have noticed his strength when he’d held me up against the wall in that room upstairs at his mothers house. My body began responding to the memory, thighs clenching as my nipples tightened. It was too bad I’d marked him as off-limits to myself because I really wanted to jump his bones right now.

Clearing my throat to make my presence known, he glanced up just as he started using the shirt to dry his chest. The towel gripped in my outstretched hand, I watched, my body stiff, as he took the few steps forward to grab it. Then the man had the audacity to wink at me while doing so.

“Thanks, honey.”

I didn’t bother correcting his use of the endearment. My emotions were already raw, the sight of him half naked in my living room throwing me for a loop. I hadn’t expected him to follow me, to want answers so badly that he’d come all this way to squeeze them out of me.

He had come all this way
for
me.

Attempting to make friendly conversation, I put my hands behind my back and looked down at the floor. “So, I guess you work out huh? When did that happen?”

“About a month after you left. I thought maybe if I buffed up, I’d find me another girlfriend quick.”

Ouch. I guess I deserved that. But I could give as good as I got and I did so with ferocity in my voice. “Looks like that didn’t work out so well for you, considering you’re still single and all.”

Stefan’s bark of laughter had me looking up from the floor and to his face. It didn’t stop there though.

With lightning speed, he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me against his body. Stiffening, I put my arms against his chest and pushed, but as I’d guessed, the effort was futile.

He had me trapped. He’d come all the way to my place and I’d been dumb enough to let him in.

“Relax,” he suggested gently, the deep, velvety soft timbre of his voice sending shivers down my spine. “I know you want me.”

A thread of desire twisted through me at his words. I ignored it.

Instead I scoffed and let out a laugh of my own. “You wish.”

Dropping the towel to the floor, he wrapped his hand in my hair and pulled slightly, baring my neck but keeping his eyes on mine.

“Knock it off, Ellie. Just admit you want me and I’ll let you go.”

“I don’t believe you,” I whispered shakily. “You followed me all the way home. I thought I’d escaped then.”

“Mistake number one,” he murmured back. “Tell me you want me.”

“No,” I said, even though my statement was false and we both knew it. “I don’t want you. Let me go and leave me be.”

“Liar. Now it’s I who doesn’t believe you.”

Sliding his hand down to my ass, he yanked me flush to his frame, his arousal evident against my belly.

“I want you Ellie. I’ve always wanted you and I’ve finally decided to do something about it. I’ve spent five
long
years craving you and your delicious body. I’ll be damned if I’m going to pass up a chance to have you all to myself, to convince you that we’re good for each other. Meant for each other.”

I whimpered, unable to do anything as the emotion in his voice elicited butterflies in my tummy and a speeding up of my heart.

Trouble with a capital T stood in my apartment, holding me captive in his embrace, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to escape.

~*~

Here in the familiar warmth of his arms, I wasn’t sure what to do. What to say.

I didn’t know his objective here. He wanted me? I couldn’t figure out
why
he wanted me when he’d already had me. Six years ago, he’d proposed and I’d say yes, with every intention of becoming his wife. Of sharing our futures together.

And while I suffer with all my pain, pain I couldn’t share even though I’d tried, he’d walked away.

Why did he his words and wishes now deserve any consideration?

Because you owe him and you know it. You should have told him.

Scowling at my own thoughts, I relaxed my arms and Stefan chuckled, releasing my hair and hugging me close.

“Hey Ellie?”

His breath flitted over the shell of my ear, ticking me, and making me tense up again. “Hmm?”