Summer's End (8 page)

She didn’t even have to ask herself if something had really—fundamentally—changed. There was another woman in her bed. And although nothing physical had transpired between them, everything was different now because, somehow, Emily had gotten through to her on a deeply emotional level—one she’d considered a no-go zone years ago.
 

A tween.
Generation Y.
Wasn’t that what they were called these days? It just goes to show, she thought, how people can utterly amaze you. She crawled a bit nearer to Emily and pressed her stuffed nose into the girl’s hair. Once again, emotion engulfed her, like a shot of heroine in her veins, it seemed to immobilise and entrance her at the same time, until she felt Emily stir beneath her.

“Morning,” she whispered.

“What time is it?” Emily’s voice sounded as if it needed to be ironed.

“Six.” Marianne huddled closer.

“How utterly dreadful.” Emily backed up against her, sighed, and went back to sleep. Not a morning person then.

Marianne figured she could forego her morning beach run just this once. What better occasion than a woman in her bed? Now that the room was filled with morning light, her eyes caught hold of the picture of Ingrid and her. And, for an instant, it did feel like a lifetime ago. Marianne was not the same person anymore. She’d changed for the first time after meeting Ingrid. For a second time after the fatal crash. God, how she longed for the next transformation.

Emily’s words had kept playing in her mind throughout a fitful night.
Who says you can’t be happy?
There was only one person standing in her way, Marianne knew, and it was herself.

In her sleep, Emily turned on her back, her wrinkled face aimed directly at Marianne, forcing a smile to her lips. Then another thought slowly made its way into Marianne’s mind.

It was Saturday, August the thirty-first. It was her forty-first birthday. She didn’t want a cake, but she knew what she did want.
 

As if Emily had read her mind while she was sleeping, her eyes flew open. “What day is it today?” she croaked.

“Saturday.”

A wide grin appeared on Emily’s face. “Looks like you’re over the hill then.” She pushed herself up, shoving Marianne’s arm off her in the process, and straddled her. “Happy birthday.” Her eyes sparkled in the golden light of sunrise. She leaned down, her arms resting on either side of Marianne’s head, and pecked her softly on each cheek.

Something loosened in the pit of Marianne’s stomach, but she had no time to dwell on it.

“What do you want for your birthday?” Emily’s tone was not insistent, more probing and careful not to make assumptions.

“You,” Marianne replied without hesitation.

“I’ll see what I can do.” Emily shot her a wide smile. One that dislodged another tight knot deep beneath Marianne’s ribcage. She bent her elbows and this time, her mouth didn’t aim for Marianne’s cheeks. Her lips landed on Marianne’s and the kiss sent a spark of desire right up her spine. She responded by grabbing hold of Emily’s neck and pulling her close, until she realised that, despite it being her birthday, it was a day like any other at the Lodge.

“I can’t… not right now…” She tried to say in between passionate lip locks. “I have guests and—”

“Dao will take care of them. It’s your birthday.” Emily had stretched her body on top of Marianne’s and her nipples pressed into Marianne’s flesh. She could hardly argue with that. She tried anyway.

“I have to help her. I’m always there.”
 

Emily nipped at her neck. “Today you’re not. And you know what? The place is not going to crumble to the ground. The world will still turn. The guests will not leave.”

“God, you’re bossy.” Marianne couldn’t suppress a smile.

“I know.” Emily stared down at her with her big blue eyes. “It’s one of my quirks.”

“Thank you for last night.” The words just came. Marianne didn’t have to think about them or weigh them. “You’ve no idea what it meant to me.”

“I do.” Emily nodded and chewed the inside of her lip.

“You’re beautiful and kind and so very thoughtful.” Marianne cupped Emily’s chin with her hands.

“Oh yeah?” Emily’s eyes sparkled. “And you’re bloody hot.” She bent down and found Marianne’s ear. “And I want you so much.”

EMILY

Maybe Emily gave the impression that she knew what she was doing, but she didn’t have a clue. Her entire body was buzzing, her heart drumming with desire and her blood pulsing with lust. And she really needed Marianne to take charge, but didn’t know if she was in the right state of mind to do so.

She’d had the fantasy often, and even indulged in it while lying next to Marianne in her bed last night. A sensual initiation by someone who knew exactly what they were doing. She was twenty-four, formerly engaged and hardly a virgin, but when it came to this, when it came to sleeping with another woman, she might as well have been.

“God, I want you too,” Marianne whispered back and Emily felt her body grow rigid underneath hers for an instant. It was only Marianne tensing her muscles so she could topple Emily off of her and take place on top of her.

“You’ve come here and you’ve turned my world upside down.” Marianne looked down at her, her face still blotched from last night’s tears, her hair a mess from sleeping, and Emily felt exactly the same way.

If this was going to be her first time with a woman—and it was—then what could be better than this? It was unexpected, yes, but was she supposed to have planned for it then? And all those thoughts, as meaningful and deep as they were, they dissolved instantly when Marianne traced a line with her fingertip over Emily’s nipple.

“I’ll try to go slow.” Marianne’s voice had grown husky while her fingers drew circles around Emily’s nipple. “But it won’t be easy.” With that, she pinched Emily’s nipple between her thumb and index finger, causing Emily’s breath to stop in her lungs.
 

Do whatever you want to me, Emily wanted to say, but the words stayed lodged behind the lump in her throat. With eager fingers, she pulled at Marianne’s sleep-crumpled blouse. She wanted it off of her. She wanted skin on skin and fingers on her naked breasts and, more than anything, inside of her.

The blouse was tight and Marianne helped her hoist it over her head. Emily had seen her in a bikini, but it was hardly the same as the white lace bra she was wearing now and she couldn’t help but wonder if Marianne had dressed to impress—and if wearing an actual bra for once was part of that plan. Emily fumbled with the lock and held her breath until Marianne’s breasts sprang free. Emily had seen naked breasts before, but never like this.

Her eyes locked with Marianne’s. She noticed what Emily seeing her naked from the waist up did to her. Emily saw the years of pent-up everything—lust, life, love—flash in the dark of Marianne’s eyes. It erupted in the blush on her cheek bones, in the sudden drops of sweat on her forehead, and the raggedness of her breath.

“Take me,” Emily said. “Don’t go slow on my account. Please.”

It seemed as if Marianne had lost the power of speech altogether. As if the time had come for her body to work through it now, to chase away the demons of the past. She tore at Emily’s t-shirt and bra, yanking them over her head, causing the entire expanse of Emily’s skin to break out in goosebumps.
 

Marianne’s lips captured her left nipple, gently licking it first, before sucking it into her mouth and taking it between her teeth. Emily buried her hands in Marianne’s hair, digging her nails deep into her scalp, spurring her on.
 

Maybe Emily had always known—because how could she not?—but if she didn’t, she knew now. Because this was, no doubt, what it was always supposed to have felt like. Fire and abandon. Heat and passion. Desire and emotion crashing together the way their skin did. The way everything about them did.

Emily couldn’t stop herself, as if a madwoman had taken possession of her body and wormed her way under her skin. She pushed Marianne’s head down, because if no one was going to attend to the mess down there soon, she’d lose all control—and she was already well on her way.

Slow. What a joke.

Marianne caught the hint and kissed her way down Emily’s belly. Not with soft pecks, but licking and kissing and biting frantically, because this was as much a first for her as it was for Emily.
 

She hitched her fingers under the waistband of Emily’s panties and tore them off her. Emily greedily helped her by wildly kicking the panties off her legs.

And then there she lay. Naked and wet. Her legs spread for another woman. Her cunt pulsing with need. Watching Marianne as she rested her gaze between her legs made Emily dizzy with desire. Why had she wasted so much time on boys? If a simple look from another woman could make her feel this way?

No time to dwell, because Marianne lowered her head and Emily didn’t want to miss a second of that. She flicked her tongue along Emily’s pubic hair, planting gentle kisses, inhaling deeply. Emily wanted to scream and beg and plead, but she also knew she had to give this moment to Marianne to truly share it.

The first touch of Marianne’s tongue on her clit nearly sent her reeling.
 

“Oh god,” she moaned, her hand searching for something to hold on to. She found Marianne’s hand, splayed out on the bed next to Emily’s shivering body. She intertwined her fingers with Marianne’s while an onslaught of licks and flicks was launched on her clit and pussy lips. Emily didn’t know how long she was supposed to last, how long this was supposed to go on for, but her body was already giving way.
 

She glanced at Marianne’s bobbing head between her legs, at their interlocked fingers, at the yellow morning light slanting into the room and she knew this was what she’d been waiting for all her life. This moment. This revelation. This life-changing orgasm.

She came. Hard and quick. Her body spasming while her muscles momentarily lost control. Marianne’s impossibly soft tongue on her most intimate parts. And then it was her turn to burst into tears.

She cried for Marianne and for herself. For all she had left behind and for everything that was to come. For the intensity of the moment and the fleeting notion in her mind that everything was possible. If something could feel this good and transformative, anything was possible.

MARIANNE

“Hey.” Marianne hurried from between Emily’s legs, a bit groggy from the force with which she had clasped them around her head when she had reached her climax. “Come here.” She lifted up Emily’s head and cradled it in her arms, stroking her hair.

She had probably piled too much on her, possibly taken too much too soon. “Are you all right?” She pressed a kiss onto Emily’s hair and waited for her to respond.

“I’m usually not so sentimental.” Emily’s cheeks moved against her chest when she spoke. “It’s just, well, this has been a long time coming for me.” She searched for Marianne’s eyes as she continued. “No pun intended.” The bright smile that shone from her face caused a surge of relief to travel through Marianne’s muscles, slackening her posture.

They both broke into a silly chuckle.

“Thank you.” Emily freed herself from Marianne’s hug. “I guess I really needed that.” She straddled Marianne again, just like she had done before. “Just like I need this now.” Her golden hair cascaded onto her shoulders and, backlit like that from the ever brighter light streaming through the window, she looked like an angel sent to revive Marianne from the nearly-dead.

Marianne knew what was coming next, and as much as she needed it, both on a physical and an emotional level, a fear still resided in her mind and held her back. Emily kissed her and the fear nearly subsided there and then, but it wasn’t enough. Touching someone the way she had just touched Emily was surely an incredibly intimate gesture, but not as intimate as opening yourself up, as spreading your legs the way Emily had done. Marianne wasn’t sure she could do it yet, despite the incessant throbbing of her clit and the butterflies fluttering in her stomach.

She pulled back from the kiss, pushing the back of her head into the
 
pillows, and regarded Emily. She looked different, reborn almost, as if, after months of travelling—possibly longer—she’d finally found a home. The fire in Emily’s eyes was enough to wash away the insecurities that had crippled Marianne from the inside for so long. Because there were two people in this bed, two people coming home and finding a new lease on life.

Only when it hit her that she was no longer alone could Marianne fully surrender. She let Emily kiss her neck and wrap her lips around her nipples while she stepped out of the mental shackles she had carried around for too long—almost too easily, it felt for an instant—and she let go. She let go when Emily removed her soaked panties and her tongue trailed a moist path along her belly button and then down, and even more so. Marianne let her legs fall wide eagerly by the time Emily’s lips reached her pussy and licked her as if she’d never done anything else in her life.

And then, as if nothing was suddenly enough, she gently coaxed Emily’s head up and pleaded, “I need you inside of me.”

Emily grinned up at her, her chin wet with Marianne’s juices—five year’s worth of them. She all but licked her lips. And oh, that feeling of being wanted again, of having someone’s eyes glint at the prospect of slipping their fingers inside of you, it was almost enough but not quite, because what held Marianne together in that moment, more than anything else, was that she had allowed herself to be wanted again.

Not for long though, because Emily changed position, and Marianne could already feel the tip of a finger circling her entrance. Marianne knew that, once inside, that finger would change everything. It would change her from profoundly untouched and detached, to someone who could love again. Emily’s finger slid easily along her wet folds and the connection it established blew Marianne away. It was just a finger, but it healed her and it transformed her in that moment.

“Come here,” she called for Emily because she didn’t want to be alone in the moment. She pulled her up while her finger remained inside. “More,” she said when Emily’s face was level with hers.