Authors: Chandra Sparks Taylor
T just stood there laughing. He looked like he was about to say something, but Loretta came switching into the room. “Hey, T,” she said, giving him a big hug and linking her arm around his. “I'm glad you could make it.”
She was talking as though she had personally invited him. I guess she was really feeling better. She had on this fitted shirt that barely covered her breasts, which were still bandaged, and these tight black pants that showed off more of her than I wanted to see. She had put on a long curly wig, which actually looked good on her.
“Hey, Loretta,” I said.
“Oh, hey, girl,” she said, not bothering to look at me. “So, T, can I get you anything?” She led him to the sofa and sat right up under himâan inch more and she would have been in his lap.
“Move, Loretta,” I said, and for a second I thought she was going to ignore me.
I grabbed her arm and helped her to the other end of the sofa.
“Why you tripping?” she said. “I was just trying to make T feel at home.”
“Whatever, Loretta,” I said. I turned and looked at Derrick and Kyle. “You guys hungry?”
As expected, they didn't turn down the free food. We sat watching the end of the movie they were watchingâwell, everyone was watching but Kyle, who seemed to be staring T down.
After the movie was over, we sat around just looking at each otherâor rather, Loretta was looking at T.
“What time is it?” Kyle finally asked.
I glanced at the clock on the cable box. “A little after midnight,” I said.
Derrick stood and stretched. “I should be getting home,” he said, trying to cover a yawn.
“Man, why you trippin'?” I asked. “You don't have to work tomorrow.”
He looked at me and shook his head, and I remembered our curfew, which I hadn't had to follow since I'd moved out almost a month ago. “I forgot you still live at home with your mama,” I said, laughing at my own joke.
Derrick was about to say something when Triple T jumped in. “Baby, that's not cool,” he said. “You need to chill with that.”
I didn't know whether to focus on the fact that he was calling me baby or that he had something to say to me in front of my friends.
T looked at Derrick. “I've been telling your sister that she needs to make up with your mom. Family is everything, man. She doesn't realize what she has.”
I saw a level of respect light Derrick's eyes, which annoyed me for some reason.
“But I do realize you're talking about me like I'm not here,” I snapped.
“Sorry, baby,” T said, cupping my knee.
I grinned at him as I melted. “It's okay,” I said. I had never had a guy pay me this much attention before, especially in front of my friends, and I loved it.
I glanced at his hand on my knee and felt my insides warm. When I looked at up, Kyle was staring straight at me looking like he wanted to chew cement.
“What?” I asked.
He shook his head, then changed his mind. “I need to talk to youâalone,” he said.
“Whatever you can say to me, you can say to T,” I said, linking our fingers together.
“No, I can't,” Kyle said. He grabbed my arm and helped me up off the couch.
When I tried to pull away, he looked at me. “Five minutes,” he said.
I looked at T. “It's cool,” he said.
The minute we were in Loretta's room, I turned to face Kyle. “What is your problem?” I asked, placing my hands on my hips.
“Why are you with this clown?” he said. He was trying to keep his voice low, but I had a feeling T could hear everything he said.
“What are you talking about?” I said. “T's a good guy. He loves me, and I love him.”
Kyle barked a laugh. “Jas, you can't be serious. You just met this dude. How are you gon' say you're in love with him?”
“Why do you care?” I asked. “It's none of your business.”
He looked at me and closed the door to Loretta's bedroom. “You are my business. You've been my girl for a long time, Jas, and I've always been real with you. I don't trust this guy. There's something about him I don't like.”
I relaxed a little when I realized Kyle was just looking out for me. “You're just jealous,” I teased.
“Maybe,” he said.
“Don't worry, Kyle,” I said, patting him on the shoulder. “You'll always be my boy. There's room in my heart to love both you and T.” I went to open the bedroom door.
Kyle swung me around, pushed me up against the door and kissed me so hard I lost my breath. Before I realized it, I was kissing him back, grabbing at his clothes.
At the sound of a knock on the door, we sprang apart, chests heaving, and I looked at him in shock.
I smoothed my hair and tried to straighten my clothes as Kyle opened the door. Derrick took in the scene and grinned, although he didn't say anything except, “I'm leaving. I'll call you tomorrow, Jas.”
I nodded, too embarrassed to speak.
Kyle headed back to the living room, giving me a few minutes to get myself together.
What just happened?
I wondered, looking at myself in the mirror. Although my breathing had slowed down, my face was really red, and I lookedâ¦I looked like I had been thoroughly kissed.
When I finally felt as though I looked halfway normal, I returned to the living room to find Loretta once again sitting up under T.
“Girl, why are you up under my man?” I asked, avoiding looking at Kyle whose eyes I could feel on me.
“He was just telling me all about the music business,” Loretta said. “T promised to introduce me to some of the people he knows. I just know he's going to be my big break.”
I rolled my eyes.
T untangled himself from Loretta and stood. “Baby, I'm gonna head back home now,” he said. He walked over to kiss me on the cheek. “I'll call you in the morning. I love you.”
I stood on tiptoe and gave him a tiny kiss on the lips. “Call me when you get in so I know you made it home okay. I love you,” I said, wrapping my arms around him, hoping Kyle would see just how devoted I was to my man.
T looked at Kyle and nodded; then he turned to Loretta, who was standing there like she was waiting on a kiss, as well. He touched her on the shoulder.
“I'll give you a call tomorrow,” she said.
He just smiled.
“You gave her your number?” I asked T with an attitude.
He shook his head.
I turned to Loretta. “How are you going to call him?”
“Girl, I got his number off the caller ID.” She grinned. “Bye, T.”
I was about to walk him to the car, but he stopped me at the door. “It's okay, baby. You stay here and finish chilling with your friends.”
“I'm sorry they were acting so crazy,” I said.
“It's cool. I'm glad I got to hang out with them. It's good getting to know people who know you. Stay beautiful,” he said, kissing me once again. Then he was gone.
When I made it back to the living room, Loretta was nowhere in sight.
“Where's Loretta?” I asked Kyle, still avoiding looking at him.
“She said she was tired and she was going to bed,” he said, picking up the remote.
“That was fast,” I said. “I guess all that acting wore her out. You're not leaving?”
“Nah,” he said. “I figured I'd chill here for a minute.” He leaned back against the sofa pillows, making himself comfortable.
“That's cool, but you're sitting on my bed,” I said. I was trying to keep our conversation as normal as possible, but my mind was racing as I tried to figure out what had happened in Loretta's bedroom.
He moved over to make room for me. “What, you're scared to sit next to me now?”
“Boy, please,” I said, giving him a dry laugh. I plopped down next to him, and I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye as I pretended to watch some old Nick Cannon movie.
When had Kyle become so fine? I wondered. He used to be real skinny, but he had started working out the previous summer, and I realized he was cut. His mustache had finally come in, and it made him look much older and sexier. I shook myself, not believing that I was thinking this way about one of my closest friends.
“Do you plan on talking about what happened in there?”
“What do you mean?” I asked, playing dumb.
“Jas, don't trip,” he said, throwing the remote on the couch and looking at me.
“Oh, you're talking about that little kiss? Boy, that wasn't nothing.” I waved my hand at him and turned my attention back to the screen, but I saw him nod out of the corner of my eye.
He stroked his newly grown goatee thoughtfully. “It wasn't nothing, huh?”
I looked him dead in the eye so I could pretend I hadn't been affected by him. “No,” I said with an attitude. “I don't know why you did that, anyway. You know I got a man.”
“I did it because I want to be your man. I have for a long time,” he said seriously.
I looked at him like he was crazy. “Boy, quit playing.”
“Do I look like I'm playing?” he asked.
He didn't.
I turned to face the TV again. “Like I said, I have a man,” I said.
“You weren't acting like you had one when you were kissing me a little while ago.”
“First of all, I wasn't kissing youâ”
That was as far as I got. Kyle had me on the sofa so fast, it took my mind a second to catch up with what was happening. When it registered, I was wrapped in his arms, kissing him with everything I had in me.
It was by far the best kiss I had ever had.
When Kyle finally ended the kiss, I just stared at him.
“We can't do this,” I said.
“Why not?” he asked softly.
“T's my man.”
“He doesn't have to be,” Kyle said.
I thought about what he said. “But I want him to be,” I said.
“Why? Because he's got money and connections?”
I nodded slowly. “That's part of it,” I said. “I love him, too.”
Kyle shook his head. “You love him, but you're sitting here on a sofa with me slobbing me down?”
I couldn't say anything, so I looked at the floor.
“Jas, you're my girl, and if you don't want to be with me, I'll respect that, but don't give me some bull reason for it. I've always had your back, and I always will. I'm telling you right now that T is up to no good. Think about it. He's almost twenty years old. What would he want with a sixteen-year-old girl other than sex?”
“The same thing you want,” I threw back at him.
Kyle just laughed. He stood and walked to the front door, and without my consent, my body followed him. “Where are you going?” I asked.
He turned the doorknob, his back still to me. “The day is going to come when you realize who's really down with you. When you're ready, you know where to find me.” He opened the door and walked out without looking back.
I just had to have the last word, so I screamed at him, “Don't flatter yourself, Kyle. My man loves me.” Even as I said the words, I wondered if they were really true. This whole thing with T was happening so fast, and although I really believed he cared for me, I wasn't sure if it was love.
Kyle didn't even bother to respond as he got in his brand-new Toyota Prius, a graduation present from his mother, and drove off.
I headed to the bathroom and prepared for bed. As I was going to turn off the overhead light, I spotted a white envelope with my name and a return address handwritten on the front. Curious, I opened it and found a check for five thousand dollars from the guy who wanted me to deejay his party. I guess he was really serious about me being there, since he had paid the entire amount up front. I smiled, thinking about all the money I was making. It looked like I wouldn't need T to front me the money for a place after all, I realized, calculating all I'd made so far that summer.
When I finally turned off the overhead light and climbed onto the sofa, I lay awake for hours thinking about T and Kyle and wondering if it was possible to be in love with two men at the same time.
T
and I had only been dating a few weeks, but we had become inseparable. I started meeting him at his house and different places around the city because Loretta was driving me crazy trying to get up under him, and every time I turned around, Kyle was at the house. I had stepped to Loretta a couple of times, but it didn't seem to have any effect, and I tried ignoring Kyle, but it was hard.
T was still helping me find a house, but we hadn't found one I liked yet, and I still refused to speak to my mother, so for the moment I was stuck with Loretta.
One night after T and I had had a movie marathon, watching movies that hadn't even made it to the theaters yet, T gave me one of the biggest surprises of my life. He grabbed my hand and pulled me out of my plush movie-theater-style chair and led me into his bedroom.
“Close your eyes,” he said.
“T,” I protested, “you know I hate surprises.”
He just laughed, because he knew I was lying. Every time I was with him, he had something for me, and I loved it. “Hold out your hands and close your eyes,” he ordered.
I did as he requested, and he placed what felt like a small box in my hands. “Open them,” he said.
“What's this?” I asked, staring at the blue box with the white ribbon. Since hanging out with T, I had learned that it was the jewelry store Tiffany's signature box.
“Open it,” he encouraged.
I pulled off the ribbon and removed the lid. Inside, on a bed of cotton, was a sterling-silver key chain shaped like a heart. “It's beautiful,” I said. I stared into his eyes. “Thank you.”
“It's so you can have a piece of my heart with you wherever you go,” he said.
I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him. “I love you,” I said, and immediately an image of Kyle came to mind, but I pushed it away.
“I love you, too,” he said, and grinned.
“I'm going to put my keys on it right now,” I said, running to find the Coach purse he had given me the week before.
“Wait,” he said, stopping me in my tracks. “Before you add those keys to it, there's another one I have for you.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a silver key.
“What's that to?” I asked.
“My house,” he said.
I looked at him in amazement.
“Jas, you're over here all the time, and I want you to know that my door is always open to you. You can even move in if you'd like.”
He saw the frown that covered my face and quickly said, “Or if you'd just like to come in here to chill to get away from your girl, that's cool, too.”
“Thank you,” I said, too stunned to say anything else. No man had ever made me feel this way.
“We really need to practice,” I said to my brother the next day when he called me.
All-City was only a week away, and we had only worked on our routine once or twice, but I wasn't worried. Derrick and I always had our thing locked up, and I knew even if we only practiced one more time we were still going to win.
“Yeah, I've been meaning to talk to you about that,” he said.
“What about it?” I asked, only half paying him attention. I was going through some albums for a party I had to do Saturday night.
“I've decided not to perform with you.”
“What?” I yelled. I dropped the album I was holding, not caring about damaging it. “You can't be serious. I thought we were past that.”
“Look, Jas, I've been thinking about this, and I've decided that I really want to focus on schoolâ”
“But school doesn't start until after the competition,” I interrupted.
“I know,” he said, “but if you'll let me finish⦠Morgan is holding this Future Medical Leaders symposium next weekend, and I've decided to attend.”
“But you promised,” I whined.
“I know,” he said softly. “I'm sorry.”
I knew this symposium must have meant a lot to him for him to cancel on me, but I didn't care.
“What about our record deal?” I asked.
“You mean your record deal. You've always known that's not what I want to do. You're going to win the competition and land a deal without me. I think the real question is what you're going to do about school. You haven't said anything about it since you moved out. Are you still planning to go?”
“No,” I said, shaking my head. “The only reason I was really considering it was because Mama and Daddy wanted it so bad, but since I'm not living at home anymore, that's not that big of a deal. It's not like I'm not making money.”
Derrick sighed, and I could tell he wanted to say something, but he didn't, and I didn't push him.
“Look, I've got to go. Since you're not going to perform with me, I've got to call the organizers of the competition and let them know; then I've got to redo my routine.” I was hoping I could make him feel guilty.
“Okay,” he said, and hung up.
I took the phone from my ear and looked at it in amazement. Derrick had never hung up on me. I thought about calling him back, but I decided I'd just talk to him later.
I tried to remember what I'd done with the organizers' phone number. Derrick normally reminded me about such things, but I didn't want to call him to ask. It took me an hour to remember I had stored it in my phone.
The phone rang a couple of times before a female answered.
“Good morning. Image Records. This is Doris Jones. How may I help you?”
Her greeting threw me for a second. I hadn't been expecting someone from Image Records to answer the phone.
“Hello?” she said.
“Uhâ¦hi, Ms. Jones. My name is Jasmine Richardson, and I'm one of the acts for All-City.”
“Hi, Jasmine. You're performing with your brother, right? How may I help you?”
“How'd you know I was performing with my brother?” I asked curiously.
“It's my job to know,” she said. “Besides, there are only five acts.”
“Oh,” I said, having forgotten that there was only going to be one act from each borough.
“How may I help you?” she repeated.
“My brother won't be able to participate,” I said.
“Oh, dear,” she said, and I could sense her frown through the phone.
“I'll still be there,” I said quickly.
“Hang on for a minute,” she said.
She put me on hold for about five minutes before she came back. “Jasmine, unfortunately, if your brother doesn't participate, then you won't be able to, either.”
“What?” I screamed.
“You guys entered the first competition as a team, and you'll have to perform that way at All-City. It wouldn't be fair to the other teams if we let you make changes to your group.”
“But I'm still planning to perform,” I said.
“I understand, but rules are rules,” she said firmly. “Should I contact the runner-up to replace you?”
I could just picture her with her finger poised over the phone keypad, ready to give someone else the chance to win my record deal. “No,” I said, figuring I would just show up the day of the event without Derrick and rock it.
“Maybe I should give them notice,” she said thoughtfully. “I wouldn't want you to come the day of the event and think you can bend the rules.”
“I wouldn't do that,” I protested, wondering if she had read my mind.
“So you and your brother will be performing?” she said.
“Yes,” I said, realizing that I had to convince Derrick to perform with me one last time.
After getting off the phone with Ms. Jones, I jumped in my car and headed over to my parents' house. I had only been back once since I'd left, and that was only long enough to collect the rest of my things.
Derrick was in the driveway working on his car.
“We need to talk,” I said the minute I pulled up behind him.
He didn't look surprised to see me.
He put down his wrench and turned to me. “What do we need to talk about?” he said.
“You've got to perform with me,” I said. “They won't let me perform otherwise.”
He took his time wiping his hands on an oily cloth before responding. “I told you there's a symposium the same weekend.”
“I know,” I said. “Derrick, I promise you I tried to set it up so I could perform on my own, but they won't let me. If you don't do it, I guess I'll just have to sign with DC.”
I figured this would get him, because despite all the money DC had paid me, Derrick still couldn't stand him.
“Jasmine, stop with the games,” he said.
“What are you talking about?” I asked innocently.
He just shook his head. “Grow up,” he said. “I told you, the world does not revolve around you. Other people have dreams, too. You were woman enough to move out of this house, now be woman enough to stop playing games and just ask for my help.”
I thought about saying something smart, but it wasn't the time. “Fine,” I finally said. “If you could perform with me one last time, I would really appreciate it. I promise I won't ask for anything else.”
“Yes, you will,” he said. “You wouldn't be Jasmine if you didn't come begging to me for something.” He grinned, and I picked up a rag and threw it at him.
“Thanks, Derrick,” I said, giving him a hug. “What are you going to do about your symposium?”
“I realized after I talked to you on the phone that it's the following weekend,” he said, and turned back to his car.
“So you put me through all that for nothing?”
He shrugged. I looked around for something else to throw at him. I spotted the hose, which gave me a much better idea. I picked it up and made sure it was turned all the way up.
“Derrick,” I yelled.
“What?” he said, sounding annoyed. He leaned in to the backseat of his car without bothering to look at me.
“Can we practice once you're done?” I asked. I was trying to think of a reason to get him to look in my direction, but none came to mind.
“I guess,” he said, still preoccupied with his car.
“You hungry?” I asked, putting down the hose.
“Not really,” he said, backing out of the car.
Before I could pick up the hose, he doused me with a Super Soaker water gun.
I reached for the hose, but there was so much water in my eyes I couldn't see, and my brother just kept assaulting me.
By the time I got him back, I was soaking wet.
We were laughing so hard we could barely breathe when Mama and Daddy pulled up in the driveway.
“What a great sight,” Daddy said, grinning as he got out of the car. “Hey, baby.” He walked over and gave me a kiss.
“Hey, Daddy,” I said, hugging him despite my wet clothes.
I looked beyond him at Mama and gave her a tight smile. “Hi,” I said.
“Hi, Jasmine,” she said. “It's good to see you.”
“You, too,” I said, looking at her. She looked older, and I realized I really had missed her.
“Would you like to go out to dinner with us?” she asked. “We're going to celebrate my promotion.”
“You got a promotion?” I asked. It felt weird not to know what was going on in her life.
She nodded and smiled.
“Congratulations, Mama,” I said. Part of me wanted to go and hug her, but I ignored the urge.
“Thanks, baby,” she said. She walked over and wrapped her arms around me and squeezed me tight. “It's good to see you, Jasmine. So good.”
I held myself stiff for a few seconds; then, before I knew it, I had melted into her arms and was crying every tear that was in me.
It was good feeling as though I was part of a real family again. For weeks I had been trying to pretend that T and Loretta were my family, but truthfully, I really did miss Mama and Daddy.
We went to Red Lobster and had a good time just laughing and talkingâbeing a family.
Once we'd finished eating, we headed back to the house, and I hung out for a little while, then got up to leave.
“Where are you going?” Mama asked.
“Back to Loretta's,” I said, looking for my keys in my purse.
“Baby, you don't have to do that,” Daddy said. “Your room's still waiting for you.”
“You're welcome to stay,” Mama said.
I got excited at the thought.
“Know that living here means you're going to live by my rules,” she said.
I remembered what T had said to me about making up with Mama, then thought about her rules, which were part of the reason I had left in the first place. In a few short weeks, I had gotten a taste of freedom, and I wasn't trying to go back. I still hadn't told Mama and Daddy about not going to college, but I guessed they assumed that that hadn't changed.