Souls ReAligned (18 page)

Sliding his thumbs across her swollen folds, he parts her, exposing her throbbing clit. Feeling the warmth of his breath makes her want his mouth on her, more than anything she has ever wanted before. The long hard drag of his tongue across it makes her arch her hips upwards searching for more of his mouth. Surrounding the sensitive knot of nerves with his lips, he skillfully works her into a frenzy with his tongue, until her body is trembling with intense pleasure. His fingers work in and out of her feverishly, massaging the sensitive spot inside her, pushing her closer to her release. He knows that she’s ready when her pussy tightens around his fingers. A few small pulls of suction with his mouth on her over-stimulated clit, makes her lose control and erupt into spasms of pleasure. She screams out his name. Her wrists painfully straining against her restraints, as her body pulses, and the waves of her orgasm finally subside.

Ethan quickly climbs up her body using his powerful biceps to hover over her and lines up his aching cock. “I need to be inside of you,” he grunts, as he rocks his hips forward looking for entrance.

Finally, coming down from ecstasy Olivia remembers the scene, she’s supposed to struggle. Resist. Using every ounce of physical strength she has left, she manages to slam her thighs shut. Twisting her hips under his hard body, she makes him miss his target, grazing his hard shaft heavily against her thigh.

“Fuck!” he growls. Lifting his head, he warns her with an angry stare, his eyes dark and scary. Reaching down, he grabs her knee and pulls her back underneath him, “Who do you think you’re fooling? You can try to pretend that you don’t want me inside you, but your body doesn’t lie. I can hear your heart pounding. I can feel the excitement in the way you respond. And this…” Rubbing his hand over her smooth, clean mound, he pushes it between her still closed legs. “I love how wet you get for me, you’re so responsive. You want me in here.”

She breathes in quickly as he inserts a finger, just briefly, and then removes it. Drawing moisture up toward her still swollen clit, he teases her with small circles purposely delivered so lightly, that she knows it’s deliberately meant to frustrate her.

When he inserts two fingers, and slides them in and out slowly, her arousal begins to build again. Clenching around them, she arches her hips, trying to press harder against his hand. His knee forcefully pushes between her legs making them open wider. This time he uses both hands to push them apart, while he settles his hips between her thighs. With his hands on her hips, he holds her down with firm pressure as he leans forward and drives into her with fierce need. “Come again for me!” he demands with absolute control in his Irish brogue.

“I can’t,” she whispers, barely come down from the first one. With the overwhelming need to touch him, she pulls on the belt wrapped around her wrists trying to free them.

“You will,” he says, picking up speed and unleashing powerful thrusts. His pelvis rubs across her clit on every forward stroke with unbearable friction. Struggling against the restraints, she becomes exhausted at her efforts to free her hands so she can touch him. The rough fabric starts to chafe and dig into her wrists as it rubs against her damp skin.

“Untie my hands,” she pleads quietly as she nears her breaking point. Her request goes unheard. Using the safe word would bring everything to a complete stop. She doesn’t want that to happen. She just needs to touch him, “Ethan, please,” she says louder, “Untie me.”

Feeling the subtle change in her body language beneath him, he pulls himself out of the scene. Letting reality set back in, Ethan slows his movements and then stops. Supporting his weight on one forearm, he reaches up to release the belt from where it’s tied to the bed. When Olivia lowers her aching arms, he holds the one end of the belt in his teeth and pulls the other end releasing the knot in one quick maneuver. One wrist at a time he frees them from their bonds, his soft lips lightly pressing against the chaffed skin in a nurturing kiss. She sighs in sheer relief, as he tosses the belt to the floor.

Immediately, she tangles her fingers through his hair and pulls him closer. Her lips search for his in a desperate need to connect with him on a more intimate level. There’s no doubt that she responded to the play of false resistance. She desired it. Needed it. Now she needs more, something inside her needs to know that he’s here with her. She needs his intimacy… his heart.

As always, Ethan knows exactly what she needs. Raising himself slightly, adjusting his position, he slowly starts to push inside her again. His face only inches away, he stares into her eyes. If love enters through the eyes, he’s just professed it, assuring her that in this life and every other he’ll look after her and keep her safe. That’s not all that she sees there. In those meadow green eyes, she sees the promise that he’ll
never
give up on her.

Rolling his hips and sliding deeper inside her, he resumes his thrusting, all the while holding her gaze. With slow and steady strokes, he delivers the pressure she needs. “Come for me again,” he whispers against her mouth. As her second orgasm begins bearing down on her, she clamps down around him squeezing tightly. The coiling in his groin grows stronger, more forceful. He buries his face in her neck as his balls pull tighter and his breathing comes in short hot pants against her skin.

Her hands trail desperately down his body, feeling his warm damp skin. Gripping his hips and thighs, she holds him as close as possible. Fever sears through her body, erupting into another fierce orgasm. Trembling with pleasure, she tilts her hips, sinking him deeper. With a harsh curse he jolts violently, slamming his hips against her pelvis. Coming hard, he calls out her name in a strained voice.

Collapsing on top of her, completely spent, he tries to calm his breathing. His body involuntarily twitches for the next few moments as he comes back to reality. When he’s once again capable of rational thought, he has a moment of distress. Rolling quickly off her, he grabs her wrists and pulls them into his view. “Baby, I’m so sorry. Did I hurt you?” Assessing the marks with concern, he frowns when he sees the raised skin, rubbed red and raw where the belt restrained her. “I did hurt you. Why didn’t you stop me?”

Olivia pulls her wrists out of his hands and then cups his face, running her thumbs across his jaw line. “You didn’t hurt me,” she says convincingly, before brushing a kiss across his lips.

“Never again,” he vows, ashamed at his loss of control. “That’s never happening again.”

She halts him with a finger against his mouth as he pulls away to say something. “Shhhhh. It’s just two little marks on my skin. It doesn’t hurt. Tomorrow every time I look at them I’m going to think about the scorching sex we just had and wish that we could do it again.”

Ethan sighs heavily and rolls on his back, pulling her with him and tucking her into his shoulder, “I don’t know if what that crazy lady says is true, but I do know this… in
this
life, you’re perfect for me. In every way you’re my equal, we fit together.”

Stroking his hand through her hair, he holds her against his chest. She yawns, exhausted from the energy she spent resisting. Enveloped in his loving embrace she drifts off to sleep.

Ethan awakens, sensing her absence in his arms. Reaching for her in the darkness, he discovers her side of the bed is empty. Opening his eyes, he sits up searching the room. With his eyes full of concern, he frowns when he finds her standing by the window. He has an overwhelming need to look after this woman. Seeing her so heavyhearted, and not knowing why, cuts deep into his soul. Standing in front of the cool glass, wearing nothing but his t-shirt, she shivers. Ethan can see the goose bumps on her skin in the glow of the moonlight. Quietly, he edges his way to the side of the bed and sits. Gripping the corners of the blanket, he pulls it up over his shoulders as he stands.

Wondering if she’s had another nightmare, he moves behind her, pressing his chest against her back. Sweeping his arms around her waist, he wraps the blanket around them, sheltering her in its safety and warmth. Resting his cheek on the side of her face, he lowers his mouth to her ear, “Can’t sleep?”

She tries to shake her head but her neck feels too heavy to move. The moon illuminates the window, allowing him to admire her beauty in its reflection. Suddenly it dawns on him. His emotions twist around in his gut like a knife at the thought of her sister’s words. How could someone so beautiful feel she’s unworthy of love? All he can think about is making things right. “Olivia?” he whispers in her ear, “You know I love you, right?” The words are out of his mouth before he has time to stop himself. “Because I do. I want you to know that. I haven’t said the words yet because I didn’t think you were ready to hear them. Until you’re ready… I need you to know that the feelings…
those
feelings, are there for me.”

The long silence is unbearable for him. Just when it’s almost
too
painful to endure any longer she whispers softly, “I feel that way too.”

Feeling dizzy, he breathes out long and hard, not realizing that he had been holding his breath. Nuzzling his cheek against hers, he kisses her gently. Opening his eyes, he feels suddenly alarmed as something damp runs down her cheek. As he skims his lips across her face, he can taste the salt from her tears.

“Hey,” he says to her with concern in his voice. “Hey.” He tries to soothe her again. “Shhhhh. Please don’t cry. I can’t stand to see you cry. Tell me what’s wrong,” he asks helplessly. The blanket drops to the floor as he uses both hands to turn her toward him. As he wraps his arms around her again, she buries her face against his chest. Feeling her tears against his skin, he strokes her hair trying to console her. Her breathing jumps and she sniffles, trying to regain her composure. He’s at a loss, not knowing what to do. His lips hover at the top of her head, “Sweetheart. I promise to take care of you. No one will ever hurt you again. Trust me.”

Olivia moves her hand to his chest, rubbing it against his skin and trying to erase the tracks of her tears. Lifting her head, she looks up into his eyes and nods.

Thank Jesus, Mary and Joseph!
Finally, he’s making some headway. A grin begins to form on his lips as he scoops his arms under her legs and lifts her like a small child. “Back to bed for you,” he demands in that irresistible Irish accent. She giggles as he carries her back over to the bed and playfully tosses her in the middle. Jumping in beside her, he makes her bounce as he lands.

Reaching for the hem, in one swift movement he rids her of the soggy t-Shirt. Feeling exposed, she sits straight up in protest, “Ethan.”

“What’s wrong now?” he asks.

She motions to the floor. “The blanket,” she whispers, suddenly feeling shy. Shaking his head, he raises his eyebrows, “You don’t need that.”

“But…”

Swiftly wrapping his body around her, pinning her to the bed under his hard body, he stops her protest. Nose to nose he grins down at her, “I’m going to keep you warm enough.”

The sunshine gives the cooling fall air the illusion of warmth. During the drive home from the airport, Ethan spends several minutes on the phone arguing with the Artemis team in Ireland over their lack of progress. Stroking his hand, Olivia tries to calm his anger, but the vein on his forehead continues to pulse. Angry and agitated, he disconnects his call and throws his head back against the seat.

Lifting his hand to her mouth, she kisses it and then places it against her cheek. Opening his eyes, he looks down at her sparkling hazel eyes. Her nurturing glow calms him. Moving his hand, he rakes it gently through her hair and away from her face. When she looks at him with that addicting feminine allure, his frown gently glides into a smile.

Getting closer to Dufferin County, they decide to spend the rest of the day at Olivia’s house. Making himself comfortable on the couch, Ethan turns on the European soccer game and flips open her laptop to catch up on a few things. His stomach makes a loud, rambunctious, grumbling noise that makes him rub his hands across his rippling abs. “I need food,” he announces, as if she didn’t hear it for herself.

Olivia looks up from her paperwork and laughs, “Is that so?”

“Yes, I’ll need large amounts of food for energy, if I’m to continue being your sex slave. I don’t know how you expect one man to keep up with such demands. Don’t you ever need a rest? All day and all night; you’re going to kill me with your insatiable sexual needs.”

“As if it’s me who can’t get enough.” Punching him in the arm playfully, she snorts when he fakes serious injury. “I’ll go make you a sandwich.” She glances back at his charismatic smile on the way out of the room and stops, “What time is your flight tomorrow?”

Ethan stops what he’s doing, glancing up to see the affliction on her face. It kills him that he can do nothing about it. Lord knows that he’s tried to convince her to join him. “Early, I need to check in by 8 a.m. I’ll have to go soon. I have paperwork to finish at the bar, and then I need to go home and pack.”

Her heart squeezes. Aching at the thought of him being away for so long. Nodding she turns away, trying to hide her misery. On the way into the kitchen, she concedes, regretfully, that it’s her own fear that’s stopping her from going. Trying to stall things, wait them out to see if they’re real and lasting. As if slowing things down is going to make their feelings any less potent. Unable to stop it, a somber mood washes over her. An inner battle of wills takes place, making her question her choice.

Her phone chimes a notification for a new message. Glancing down, she rolls her eyes.

Ethan: How’s my sandwich coming along? I’m wasting away out here. And I miss you. You’ve been gone too long.

Olivia: I’ll be right there. Do you think you can survive another two minutes without me?

Ethan: It’ll be tough but I’ll try.

Opening the fridge to put everything away, she grumbles when her phone beeps again. “Relax, I’ll be there in a minute,” she says, loudly enough so that he can hear her.

“That wasn’t me,” he yells from the other room.

Curious, she glances down at the display.

Rachel: Really James? I’m getting tired of always being the last person to find out about what’s going on in your relationship with Ethan.

Olivia: What the heck are you talking about?

Rachel: Your Facebook status. You’re letting everyone know that you and Ethan are an official couple now?

Olivia: I didn’t post that on Facebook.

Rachel: LOL! Well then, somebody else changed your status about 3 minutes ago.

Taking a few deep breaths and closing her eyes, Olivia counts backwards from ten. Cutting his sandwich in half, she carries the plate into the living room.

Sitting with her laptop on his knees, he looks up at her innocently, flashing her that boyish grin. The one that looks like he’s up to no good.

“What?” he asks, reaching for the plate.

“You changed my Facebook status to say we’re in a relationship,” she says annoyed.

Trying to hide his amusement, he takes a large bite of his sandwich. “Yes,” he says, as he chews and swallows. “We already resolved that issue.”

“Yes, but...” Her phone beeps and despite her urge to ignore it, she pulls it out of her pocket to look at the text.

Noah: You unfriended me on Facebook?

Olivia: Not me, it was Ethan. I’m dealing with it right now.

Noah: He’s a dick! Good luck with that. There’s a storm coming. I’ll be around tonight with those sedatives you’re out of.

Gah! Looking up to see the look of total gratification on Ethan’s face, she almost smiles. This is one of those times, when she feels like she could strangle the man for his disregard of boundaries. Yet, that somber, aching feeling of loss haunts her. It draws her anger and every other feeling back inside her; promising her that if she doesn’t acknowledge them, she won’t be utterly crushed when he leaves.

Shoving her cell phone back into her pocket, she glares in Ethan’s direction, not sure how to deal with him. His grin widens, as he pops the last bite of the sandwich into his mouth. Licking his lips and wiping the crumbs from his face, he glances over at her, trying to clear his expression of satisfaction, “I’m assuming that was Thompson?”

Of all the! “Okay, Ireland. You know that was wrong, don’t you?”

Seemingly unaffected by her statement, he shrugs. Moving toward her, he prepares for all hell to break loose. He doesn’t want to spend his last afternoon with her arguing, “Olivia.”

Moving away from him, she tries to keep her distance. She can’t even bring herself to get angry with him. Feeling very emotional, she knows that if he touches her, she’s likely to burst into tears.

“How about we go upstairs for a
nap
?” he suggests. The unmistakable wiggle in his brow indicating his intentions.

Olivia shakes her head, “No thanks.” Moving to sit back down on the couch, she leaves him standing in the middle of the room by himself. Wait. What? Why isn’t she yelling at him? Knowing that normally she’d be furious with him, he turns and watches as she picks up her laptop and busies herself with it. Moving to the seat beside her, he puts his hand on her thigh. Rubbing it gently, he frowns when she doesn’t respond.

After several minutes of the silent treatment, he feels like he’s going to go out of his mind, “Olivia? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” she answers, trying to sound convincing.

Ethan tenses; the ever-dubious
nothing.
Now he knows for sure that there’s something wrong, “Baby, don’t do that. Don’t shut me out. I have to leave soon, to get some stuff done. I’m on my way home first thing in the morning. Talk to me.”

Home.
Didn’t he declare, not that long ago; that home from now on, would be where ever she is? It isn’t easy, but she ignores his caressing hand and gentle touch, “I’m not shutting you out. I’m just not in the mood right now. There’s nothing wrong. Maybe you should just go, and do whatever it is that you have to do.”

“You want me to leave?” Looking at her with wounded eyes, he waits for her to look up at him, “Do you want to come with me? Come back to my place while I pack and spend the night with me?”

“No, thank you… I’m still a little wiped out. I think I’ll just stay home.” Covering a yawn, she glances over to see his hurt expression and feels guilty. “Besides, it’s going to rain and we both know that I’m made of sugar; so I’ll melt if I get wet.”

Ethan struggles with a consuming anger. One that insists he take control and demand that she goes with him. The previous women in his life were easy to deal with. They did what they were told. That won’t be received well by Olivia, and he knows it. Why must he always mess things up with her? And why does he care so damn much that he does?

Feeling completely trounced and unsure of the cause, he’s at a loss on how to fix it. Feeling as if he’s back to square one and afraid to push her any further he looks defeated, “Well then, I’ll get on my way.”

Following him to the door, she keeps her distance, knowing that if he were to get anywhere near her she’d cave instantly.

Ethan is surprisingly complacent, not pushing or demanding. Determined to give her the space she seemingly needs, although it’s killing him that she won’t tell him why. “I’ll stop by on my way to the airport tomorrow to say goodbye. If you change your mind, call me. I’ll come and pick you up.”

Something flashes in her eyes, giving him a slight clue and he furrows his brow, “You know I don’t want to go without you, right? But I do have to go.” That look is killing him, “You can change your mind and come with me. Or meet me there in a couple of days.”

Olivia holds her breath and forces a smile, “I know.”

Leaning in, he attempts to kiss her, but he’s met with a quick brush of her lips to send him on his way. It’s agony for him, and he reaches for her, trying to pull her close. “Liv, I’m worried about you.”

She shrugs, “Don’t be. I’ll be fine here, alone, while you’re in Ireland.”

Ethan looks down at her, startled. What-the-ever-loving-fuck? He was worried about her shutting him out and whatever it is that made her pull back. With John accompanying him tomorrow, he hadn’t even considered that he was about to leave her alone, unprotected.

“Jesus, why did you make me think about that? Is that what’s bothering you?” Pulling her into his chest, he refuses to let her resist. Wrapping himself around her, he surrounds her with his muscular body, until she finally relaxes in his arms.

“Olivia…”

She holds her emotions very close to her chest, fighting hard to keep them from becoming exposed. It’s the only way that she’ll survive. She needs to convince him that she’ll be fine. Pulling away, she assures him, “I’m a big girl. I can look after myself. Been doing it for many now.”

Frustrated, he curses.

“Stop it, Ireland. I’m fine. You need to go and get ready for your trip.” Reaching for the door handle, she pulls it open and stands aside.

Pressing her against the door, he makes her take in a deep breath as he runs his hands over her body, “I want a kiss. And don’t even think that, whatever that was a few minutes ago, will be good enough.”

She’ll give him that. She’ll do anything to get him out of the house, so she can breathe and deal with these thoughts. Lifting her chin, she moves in to press against his mouth, opening her lips and inviting him in. Ethan rubs his hands firmly across her back. Trying to absorb every last minute he can before he leaves her, he holds her close. He can’t put it off any longer; he has things he has to do. Reluctantly, he tears himself away.

“Are you sure that you’re going to be okay?”

That Irish accent makes her stomach tighten. Damn him! “Yes, I’ll be fine.”
Please just go!

He nods as he clenches his jaws, “Alright then. I’ll be around in the morning before I go. Unless you put me out of my misery and stay with me tonight.” He’s only moments away from hitting his knees and begging. That would be a first for Ethan O’Connell, but he’s seriously considering it.

Finally getting him out the door, Olivia walks up the stairs to take a shower. She hopes that the warmth of the water will soothe her aching muscles and relax her mind. Tears stream steadily down her face as she sobs into the mist. Last night has left her body sore and tired. The warm water stings the chaffed skin on her wrists, making her wince. Showering is doing nothing to ease her despair. Thinking back to her last period, she tries to figure out if hormones are the reason for her unreasonable emotional reaction.

Ethan’s only been gone about a half-hour when the severe thunderstorm begins. The lights flicker on and off for several minutes, triggering in her an unmanageable anxiety. With every flash of light, she begins to think that she sees Sam’s face in the shadows. Hands trembling, she holds off as long as she can. Pulling out her phone, she stares at Ethan’s number. How can she call him? She spent all that time convincing him that she was a big girl and could look after herself. How sad is it that a silly a thunderstorm has her frightened to death? She really needs to hear his voice but he’ll notice her fear.

Instead, she decides to send him a text.

Olivia: Hi.

Ethan: Hi. Do you miss me already? Can I come pick you up?

Sitting on the edge of the couch, holding her phone to her chest she repeats to herself, “Stupid, stupid, stupid.”

Ethan watches his display, waiting for an answer. When there’s still no reply after several minutes, he starts to worry. Unable to concentrate on the work in front of him he sends another message.

Ethan: Olivia? You ok?”

Gahhh! She has to answer now.

Olivia: Yes, I’ll be ok. I guess the storm is just freaking me out a little.

Signing the last document, he stacks the papers in a neat pile on the corner of his desk and puts on his jacket. A few moments later, he dials her phone.

Olivia’s heart nearly stops when Ethan’s name shows up on the display. “Hi,” she answers feeling foolish. “I’m so sorry I bothered you. Ouch!” She jumps, burning her fingers on a match. “I’m trying to light a few more candles.”