I must be dreaming
.
“Jenny, are you okay?”
I wiped my eyes, remembering my earlier bout of crying must have made my face all red and puffy. “I'm fine.”
“Did you sleep through my whole set?”
“Yes. I mean, no.” I shook my head, feeling like a complete dork. Maxim looked disappointed, but he shrugged it off and smiled.
“So, do you or not?”
“Do I what?”
“Want to dance, sillybot.” It was the first time he had called me sillybot and I liked it a lot better than when Pell said it.
Glancing behind him at the flickering lights in the cafeteria, I thought about his offer. “What about Exara?”
He jabbed a finger behind him. “She's hanging out with her girlfriends.”
“Won't she be annoyed?”
And, likeâ¦rip off my arm?
“Nah. Come on. It's just one dance.”
My fingers slid into his before I could stop myself, and the warmth of his skin lit my whole body on fire. He led me to the dance floor just as the fast techno song came to an end, and the bass voice began a slow love ballad. I watched the other dancers to get some kind of cue.
Maxim pulled me against him. My arms instinctively wrapped around his neck. Being this close to him was dizzying in a supremely wonderful way. Heat traveled through me until I thought that I might melt in his arms.
“Your voice is awesome.” I was so impressed I couldn't stop gushing.
He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, awesome enough to put you to sleep.”
I laughed and buried my head in his shoulder. He smelled like mint and spice. His chest was hard, pure muscle. I trembled in his arms, just thinking about his shirt being off. “That wasn't your fault. I haven't been getting enough sleep lately.”
“Been up partying?”
More like feeling sorry for myself, watching movies of my previous life
. I wasn't going to say that.
“I wish.” In actuality, I'd never partied in my life.
“General Relativity getting to you?” He actually looked disappointed I hadn't called him for help.
“No. That's cool. I'm doing okay.”
“Then what is it?”
“What is what?”
“What's keeping you from me?”
Um. Exara. I stared at him. Was he serious? “What's keeping me from what?”
“Being my friend.”
Oh. Friend. How could such a nice word leave such a vile taste in my mouth? I was so disappointed I could have walked out that minute, but I had to recover if I was going to hide how much it hurt.
“I just can't shake the feeling I shouldn't be here. I should be dead.” Stupid, stupid, stupid. Why not take him to a funeral home? Show him pictures of my dead family?
He traced my cheek with his finger. “Why would you say such an uber-sad thing? Everything happens for a reason. Maybe you just haven't found the reason why you're here.”
“Back in two-thousand-twelve I wanted to save polar bears and African elephants. We all know what happened to them. My whole family's gone. Why on Earth should I still be here?”
“Maybe your purpose is staring right at you and all you have to do is open your eyes.”
Boy, did I feel my mind was making things up. Was that a double meaning? He almost looked like he thought my purpose was to be with him. He was staring right at me just like he'd said.
Our eyes locked, and the world around me blurred to nothing. Even the song muted in my head. All I heard was his breath, and all I felt was his warm embrace. His head hung lower, and his lips brushed against mine.
That was it. I lost control. I stood on my tiptoes and pressed my lips against his, wrapping my fingers around the back of his neck and pulling his head toward mine. The kiss tasted sublime, taking me to heights I'd never been before. It was only after our tongues met that I realized he was kissing me back.
Fireworks exploded in my head. If anyone was to provide a reason for waking up, this was pretty darn convincing. I wanted to dance forever.
A hand gripped my right shoulder and ripped me apart from him. Exara faced me with rage in her eyes, nostrils flaring. “Stay the hell away from my man.”
Her hand came up, and I had a moment of
is this really happening?
before her fist hit my jaw and I went sprawling backwards on my butt. Maxim pushed himself in front of her, trying to calm her, but all I saw was a different set of fireworks exploding into a headache.
The other students stopped dancing around us and stared. Even the music stopped. It was like the day I broke my leg. Only this was ten times worse.
Principal Hall pushed through the crowd. “What's going on here?”
A girl from my second-period class blurted out, “Exara punched Jenny.”
Exara fumed, held back by Maxim. She looked like she could have punched me again if he hadn't intervened. I looked into Maxim's eyes. He looked away and shook his head. He whispered something that looked very much like an apology into Exara's ear. That hurt worse than her fist. He looked like I'd just fractured his perfect world.
The principal knelt beside me. It was the first time I'd seen him in person and not on a screen. He had more wrinkles and age spots on his face. Somehow, it made him look kinder, less fake. “Is this true?”
I nodded, rubbing my jaw, which throbbed with pain.
He looked around at the other students, who all stared like I was a freak. “Witnesses?”
A few of them raised their hands. He turned to Shizznizz, who had somehow managed to slip off the stage. “Who provoked the attack?”
“She did.” Shizznizz pointed to Exara. When the principal turned his head, Shizznizz gave me a wink, like he'd just done me a favor. I guess he had. I had more potential friends than I thought. I was just too wrapped up in my own problems to notice them. I glanced at Shizznizz and nodded in thanks.
Principal Hall gestured for the chaperone teachers and pointed to Exara. “Take her away. Call her parents.” He turned back to me. “Come with me. I need to get a statement, file a report.”
“I don't want to press charges.” I was the one kissing her boyfriend, after all. In my mind, she was justified. My cheeks flamed in shame as I wobbled to my feet.
“You sure?”
“Yes. I'm fine.”
Now, please go away so I can curl up in a ball and hide under a table
.
The principal squeezed my shoulder and addressed the rest of the crowd. “The next person who fights gets one week detention and probation.” He put up his hands like a game-show host. “On with the celebration.” The music began again, and the students started dancing like nothing had happened. Maybe nothing had happened to
them
, but my world came crashing down.
Shizznizz asked if I was all right, but I just nodded and pushed through the crowd to the bathroom. I was disgusted with myself. How could I let the dance get so out of hand? Granted, Maxim was the one who asked me to dance, but I'd practically seduced him into that kiss. I'd risen up and pulled his head toward mine, and after that, I'd stuck my tongue in his mouth.
I rubbed my hands over my reddening jaw. What would I tell Valex and Len? I'd let them down as well. The first month and I'd already gotten into a fight.
At the same time, my heart sped with exhilaration. Maxim implied I was here in this century to meet him, and then he kissed me back. He liked me. The hottest guy in school actually liked me.
A sharp pain stabbed my heart. Not enough to break up with Exara, though. The guilt was plain in his eyes. I'd put it there. His words about being here for a reason resonated with me a little too well. I almost believed him. For a moment, I felt important, part of this futuristic world. Now I felt so alienated and useless that I wanted to crawl into the toilet and flush myself down to the lower levels.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Rebel
“
W
hat happened to your face?” Len gently took my chin in her hands as the door closed behind me. For a second, my eyes blurred and she turned into my mom, reaching toward me through the turn of time.
“Jennifer?”
I shook my head. Boy, had Exara given me a good whack. “I'm fine. I tripped and fell, that's all.” It was partially true, so I didn't feel as bad saying it.
Len came into focus, her dark eyes and long straight hair the opposite of Mom's. How could I have imagined it was her?
“You poor dear. That must have been embarrassing.”
I bit my lip and nodded, not having to fake my shame. That much was true.
“C-7, get Jennifer some ice.” She brought me over to the couch. “Besides that, did you have fun?”
I thought about watching Maxim sing, dancing so close, the kiss. Which answer would stir up the least amount of questions? “I guess.”
“Good.” She sighed in relief, like we'd both dodged a bullet. If anything wasn't happy in Len's world, I don't know what she'd do.
C-7 came back with an ice pack that had its own temperature gauge on the side and handed it to me. His eyes stared right through me. Somehow he knew that injury wasn't from a tumble on the cafeteria floor. My chest tightened and I held my breath. He tilted his head and blinked. “I hope you feel better, Jennifer.”
Phew! He didn't say anything
. “Thanks, C-7.” I was really thanking him for his silence, and I hoped he knew it.
Len held the ice up to my chin. The cold numbed the throbbing pain. “Do you want to stay up and watch a documentary about the new recycling policies?”
That sounded tantalizing. I tried not to outwardly cringe. “No, thanks. I'm really tired. I just want to hit the sack.”
“Okay.” She tried to hide her disappointment by fidgeting with the ice pack, but I saw a twinge in her face.
Guilt burned in my neck and cheeks. Len was trying so hard, but she couldn't get through to me. She'd never be my mom. I took the ice pack from her hands so she didn't have to stand there holding it up to my cheek.
Len reluctantly let the pack go. “Tomorrow morning I'm making soycakes with sappy sauce.”
Wasn't that every day? I nodded, wanting to make her happy. Somehow I even summoned a smile. “I'll be there.”
“Great.” She reached out to hug me, then brought her hand back and settled for touching my shoulder. Thank goodness. Only my real mom could properly give me a goodnight hug. “Good night, Jennifer.”
I took the ice pack in my hands. “Good night, Len.”
I rushed to my room and tore off my dress, throwing it under my bed to keep it from reminding me of that night. There was no way I could sleep after my first real fight. The discs called to me. It was time I stopped watching the reruns. Popping the next one in, I climbed on my bed and hugged my legs against my chest.
A Jeep rode on a trail in the bush. I got all excited. It was a
National Geographic
African safari. A whole new season I hadn't seen yet. The narrator came on the speakers. “African elephants are the largest terrestrial animal living on Earth today. Their society is grouped in family units, the head being an older female called the
matriarch.”
Watching the majestic animals tend to their calves brought me a joy I couldn't explain. It was pure, unlike shopping for crap I didn't need or sneaking out with Angela. This feeling was way more profound, a primal need to return to my roots, even though my ancestors were from Canada and far from the African bush.
These animals had as much of a right to exist as all the humans in the world. We weren't any better or more important. This new world was animals zero (well, one if you counted Jumbo), humans fifteen billion. I had to even the odds.
Maxim said my purpose might be staring me right in the face and tonight it was. I had been confused and thought it was him, when really I was destined for much more. Sitting on my bed, I vowed to return to Martha's apartment and ask her for the information to get in touch with the Timesurfers. I was ready.
The next morning I announced over soycakes and sappy sauce, “I'm going out today.”
Len dropped her spork and glanced at Valex. Obviously this issue hadn't arisen with Pell.
Pell licked her finger. “Where you gonna go?”
“Study group.” I hoped that was enough information, but if they were anything like my parents, they wouldn't let me get away that easy.
Valex cleared his throat, reminding me of my dad when I asked to borrow his credit card. Even Mr. Easygoing had his limits. “Who's in this study group of yours?”
Damn!
I needed a name, so I said the first name that came to mind. “Maxim.”
Len looked like she'd choked on piece of a soycake. “Maxim Fairweller?”
How did they know him? Why, was he so bad? “Yeah, why?”
Len tried to hide something in her face by wiping her mouth with a cloth napkin. “Nothing. I'm just making sure it was the young man I know.”
I started to get really suspicious, like a whole conspiracy was against me. “How do you know him?”