Sinners 01 - Branded (14 page)

What’s wrong with me? It’s too dangerous and he made it more than clear that I’m just
part of his job.

He whispers, “Do I look all right? I wasn’t sure what to wear.” He puts his hands
in his pockets and does a complete three-sixty.

His butt looks amazing in those jeans.
I catch myself before my jaw hits the floor and arrange my face in what I hoped was
a purely virginal appearance.
Ugh, there I go again
. “You look… nice,” I lie. He looks so handsome, but I don’t tell him.

“Then why are you blushing?”

“I’m not!”

“Okay, so when did you put a crap load of blush on?”

“I don’t wear makeup!”

His eyes linger for a moment and he smiles crookedly. “Yup, that’s why I know you’re
blushing.” He laughs and I swat him. His hands move up in a surrender position as
he backs away.

Is he really joking around with me?
A smile stays plastered on my face, thinking about how sweet it is he showed up despite
his reservations.

Then Zeus comes to my side, breaking the trance, and I look into his big brown eyes.
“I guess you’re my date, boy. Hope you like my outfit.” I laugh at myself.

Cole stares at me. “Take good care of her,” he says to Zeus. My heart skips a hundred
beats, startling me.

He looks away and sits next to Alyssa’s bed. “I’m Cole. Lexi told me all about you,
and I couldn’t help but want to meet the girl she raves about. I was wondering if
you’d do me the honor of going on a date with me?”

If a girl could light up, she just did. Alyssa grins as if she received the greatest
gift in the universe. “I’d love to.” She giggles as her face turns scarlet.

“Give me a few minutes to get her freshened up.” I close the curtain and brush her
hair, pinning it up into an elegant hairstyle my mother used to wear. After I’m finished,
Cole places one arm under her knees and the other secures her back as he lifts her
fragile body. Alyssa wraps her arms around his neck with a look of pure rapture on
her face.

“Oh, I’m sorry. It probably would’ve been more polite of me to ask before picking
you up,” Cole says.

“Yeah, of course, it’s fine.” She laughs nervously and gives me a wink.

He carries her without effort down to a vacant room, and I wipe a tear away as I watch
him fulfill a dying girl’s dream.

It’s dark except for the melted candles lit on the end of the table. The plastic ware,
which I scrounged for after talking to Sutton, sits in all the correct spots. Cole
carefully lowers Alyssa into her seat for the night. Even Sutton makes an appearance
and places a soft kiss on her head.

“Enjoy, sweetie. You deserve it.” Sutton offers me his arm and leads me out. Before
the door closes, I glimpse one more time.

Cole sits across from Alyssa, the candlelight flickering across their faces as they
laugh at something together. The ease with which he relates to her makes me smile.

Every day, I witness the ugliness of humanity and it diminishes my faith in the goodness
of people. But watching Cole show kindness to Alyssa reminds me of the kindness my
father showed others. Whenever someone needed him, even if it was dangerous, he’d
help. Instances like this give me the spark I need to keep going despite the horrific
obstacles thrown in my way.
Unbelievable that I’ve found more depth here than I ever had before.
The emotional peaks and valleys exhaust me, but my heart feels content, and it doesn’t
make sense to me.

When I return to the room, Zeus snores in my cot.
I guess I’m sleeping somewhere else.
I take Cole’s and slide under the warm covers. I fall asleep with the image of Alyssa
looking alive and happy while sitting across from Cole.

*   *   *

“Hey, wake up.” Startled, I fly up, smacking heads with Cole.

“Ouch,” we both say at the same time.

He rubs his forehead, his face scrunching with the effort. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to
startle you. I just wasn’t sure where I’m supposed to sleep since you’re in my bed
and all.”

I rub my eyes and yawn. “The cot’s yours. Zeus took mine, so I’ll sleep on the floor.”
I swing my legs to the floor, and the cold tiles sting my feet.

“Ha. No, you’re not!” A voice says beside me. “I don’t take up even half this bed.
Come in. I don’t mind sharing,” Alyssa says. For the second time in less than thirty
seconds, I jump at the sound of a voice I wasn’t expecting. I stand, straighten my
clothes, and climb in next to her.

“Thank you!” she says. “For the best day of my life.” My heart drops as she wraps
her weak arms around me.

“You don’t have to thank me. He was the one who took all the risk here.”

“But you had to ask him.”

“When it comes to you… convincing isn’t even needed. It’s impossible not to fall in
love with you. You’re a wonderful person and I want to thank you for sharing your
life with me. I’m forever changed because of you.”

She wipes her tears, rolls over to her other side, and I cover her with a blanket.
“I love you too.”

Before I can count to ten, she drifts off. I watch her; then my eyes wander over to
Cole. He stares at the ceiling, looks at me, and holds my eyes for a minute as sadness,
joy, and an unidentifiable emotion pass between us. He motions good night, and I nod,
but I’m not ready to sleep.

I watch him. The curves of his face are soft in the moonlight and his sculpted arms
wrap around his bunched up blankets. I picture those arms wrapped around Alyssa, the
way he cradled her, the way he cared for her in a way I’m sure she’s rarely felt in
her short life. I close my eyes, and as I drift off, I think of how lonely Alyssa
must have been, how lonely I’ve been. And I fall asleep, the vision of Cole carrying
me to the peace of my dreams.

The next two days pass this way. Cole and Zeus stay with me in the hospital while
Alyssa slowly slips further away from us. Each morning, Cole takes Zeus to the training
center for the majority of the day, and every night he returns at seven.

Alyssa’s condition worsens. She sleeps most of the day and barely stays awake long
enough to hold a conversation. Occasionally, she moans and shifts positions in her
bed. The only gift I can give her is my presence. It seems like such a small gift,
but it’s what I’d want if fate switched our positions. My heart seizes when I see
her grimace when she coughs or even turns her head, and I wish I could take her pain
away. But it only grows worse each day. Sutton even gave me a pamphlet on the dying
process, which at first I refused, horrified by the idea. Now I’m glad I read it because
I’m more aware of what Alyssa might need from me through her journey.

At seven p.m., Cole brings Zeus back to our room. Zeus’s eyelids droop and his legs
wobble. He flops to the floor, and within a matter of seconds, he begins snoring.

“How’s she doing?” Cole asks.

“Okay… I’m hoping I can wake her long enough to give her some ice chips; her mouth
is so dry, and she says she’s thirsty but chokes on water. She stopped eating today,
which I know is normal at this stage, but it’s really hard to watch. I’m afraid she’s
starving even though the book said she’s not. Weird, right?”

He shrugs his shoulders. “You finally read the book Sutton gave you? That’s good.”
He stands with his feet shoulder width apart and strokes his chin pensively. “I don’t
know how you do it, sit here with her knowing she’s going to—”

I scoot the chair back fast enough that it screeches obnoxiously, and I pull him into
the hall. “Shhhh. She can hear you. The book said hearing is the last thing that goes
right before
it
happens…” My tongue gets stuck and I have to clear my throat. “So we have to be careful
about what we say around her. All right?”

“Really? Wow. Okay, good to know.” He looks down at me, worry lines creasing his brow.
“How are you holding up?”

“I have my bad moments and my good moments. I just wish there was some way I could
take her place.”

All of a sudden, Zeus barrels out of Alyssa’s room, growling with his hair sticking
up on his back.

“Hey, calm down,” Cole says.

“What’s he growling about?” I ask, trembling. I steal a glance at Alyssa’s door.

“Who knows, he probably hears something.” He reaches down and rubs furiously between
Zeus’s ears. I can tell he’s a bit worried too.

I peek into Alyssa’s room, making sure she’s still breathing. Her chest rises and
falls with each shallow breath.

“Like what?” I ask, turning back to Cole.

“Dogs have incredible hearing. It could’ve been a noise he didn’t like coming from
the ground floor. He’s capable of hearing things up to a mile away in the Hole. But
in the woods, a mile and a half.”

“Wow, that’s unreal. Why can he hear farther in the woods?”

“Less distractions and not as much noise.”

“Makes sense. How was training?” I lean against the wall, feeling a little tired.

“Rough,” he replies. “This whole situation makes my life pretty difficult.”

“What situation? Being here in the hospital?” I perk up, and push off the wall to
scrutinize his face.

“No, and yes—well, sleeping up here night after night with all the other guards knowing
we’re here. Just makes things edgy.” He doesn’t usually share anything about his training
so I pay attention.

“They all know you have clearance right? You told them I’m tending to someone who
has a virus… So it’s not like you’re doing anything wrong.” I shrug it off while clearing
my throat. His eyes meet mine and his hand pauses on Zeus’s head.

“It’s not me. The fact that you’re eight floors up from the training center has them
itching to make trouble. I’ve been taking a beating at training for this, you know.
I don’t like the feeling I have—not at all. They’re obsessed with you. I’ve heard
some of them talking about what they’d do if they got you alone. We need to relocate
soon… real soon.” He stops and rethinks his last statement. “I’m sorry… I don’t say
it to be mean or insensitive, but your brand makes you a target for their games, and
your face sure doesn’t help matters.”

“My face? Do I make weird faces?” I try to change where this is going. I know what
the guards think. I’ve heard the catcalls, and I will never forget the way his comrade
touched me in the garage while giving Cole his warning.

“Yeah. That’s it.” He shakes his head then looks at his feet. “You’re beautiful. That’s
the problem.” He shuffles his feet and shifts his weight uncomfortably. “They can’t
stop looking at you.” He glances up at me for a brief second before locking his gaze
on something behind me. “And I understand why.” The words come out so soft I can barely
hear them.

Butterflies don’t just flit through my stomach—they do cartwheels and somersaults.
Feeling flustered I say, “And I know why all the girls throw themselves at you.” His
eyes snap to mine and we hold our gaze for a minute.

“I won’t leave her,” I say.

“You might not have a choice.” His eyes, still locked on mine, harden.

“You can’t do that to her? To me—”

“You don’t understand. These are my orders. I can’t just throw my arms up in the air
and leave you here, although there’re times I want to. I’m trying to do the right
thing, but you make it so damn hard sometimes. I respect what you’re doing—really
I do. But I’m telling you now that this can’t go on much longer. It’s starting to
look suspicious,” he says. The grimace on his face makes my insides freeze with flashbacks
of the execution.

“They don’t seriously think it’s like that… Do they?”

“Lexi? Are you here?” Alyssa interrupts our quiet conversation.

“I’m right here.” I run to her side. She lies under multiple blankets and no longer
has the strength to sit up on her own. “What do you need?”

“Can I try some ice chips?” she rasps.

“Sure thing. I’ll be right back.”

I leave the room and rush down the hall. Amber isn’t at her usual post, but that doesn’t
surprise me. I pass the linen closet on my way to the small kitchen area. Heavy breathing
and the sound of scuffling feet force me to stop. It sounds like someone’s messing
around in the closet. I tip toe into the kitchen, fill a glass with ice chips, and
scurry past the closet. This time I know I’m not imagining things.

Someone’s definitely in there.

Curiosity wins over as I quietly set the glass down and turn the knob. It’s dark inside,
but there’s enough light to see two figures. As I peek through the small viewing space,
I decipher a male and female kissing passionately. I’m shocked. I didn’t know there
was a male on the floor aside from Cole. Sutton went home an hour ago. I pull the
door closed, pick up the glass and hurry back to Alyssa’s room, all while wondering
whom it was.

“Thank you.” Alyssa’s been propped up with at least four pillows. “Cole helped me
up while you were gone.” She smiles at me. I glance at him, but he’s already asleep.
My mind is distracted.

“Can you wait another minute? I’ll be right back.” I ask and she nods her head while
attempting to suck on an ice chip.
I peek into the hallway. Amber walks toward me, fixes her hair, and surveys her surroundings.

“Where were you?”

Her hands fly up to her face and she jumps at the sound of my voice. She composes
herself and says, “I took a fifteen-minute break. Why do you care?”

A few yards behind her, a guard enters the hallway from the linen closet. Amber looks
at him, at me, and then at him.
Disgusting.
He’s tall like the others and wears a rigid, collared uniform. His relaxed stride
proves that he’s not worried about getting caught. We’re all standing in the hallway
now.

“What’s the problem?” He directs his question to me.

“Umm, nothing,” I stammer, putting my hand on the wall for support.

“She was just asking me for something, Zane. There’s no problem.” Her fearful eyes
fix on me as she replies.