Sinners 01 - Branded (13 page)

“I hope you trust me.” I finish her eyes, and plug the mascara up again. Her lashes
flutter as she gazes up at me. Their beauty astounds me.

“I do, silly,” she says. “I’m just a little worried about your beautician skills.
That’s all.”

I snort at her reply.
If she only knew how beautiful she really is.
I finish with the blush and lipstick. “Do you want to take a look? Or would you rather
not scream at yourself?”

“Very funny.” She opens her eyes wide, almost as if testing her new lashes. She grimaces
for a moment, breathing in and out in concentrated gasps.

“Wait. Are you all right?”

“I’m fine. It only hurts when I move, so I can’t complain. Don’t worry. I can suck
it up.”

“Do you want me to go get a nurse?”

“No. I said I’m fine.” Then I remember she has the only morphine bag in the entire
hospital and it shrinks daily. I take the tubing in my hands and examine it. “What’s
this?”

“That’s the clamp. They use that to control the amount of morphine they’re giving
me. Make sure you don’t touch it. If you roll the ball on the clamp toward the bag,
the morphine will pour into my vein and I’d get too much too fast.”

“Let me help you to the chair, then I’ll push you to the bathroom so you can get a
glimpse.”

She struggles to move, so I help lift her off the bed and onto the seat. Her body
weighs nothing, even for me. The legs of the chair scrape as I push her toward the
doorway. “Close your eyes, and don’t you dare open them until I count to three. One…
two… keep them closed. No peeking!”

“I’m not!”

“Three!” Her face says it all, her eyes widen and her mouth forms into the biggest
smile I’ve ever seen. Her eyes glaze over as her hands gently trace her cheekbones.

“I forgot what I looked like.” She smiles. “This virus has been whooping my butt.
And you just showed it who’s boss! Where’d you learn how to put makeup on?”

“I used to watch my mother years ago… Anyway, can’t screw up too bad with three items.
There’s only so many things you can do with a tube of mascara.” I shrug the tears
off with a smile.

Then the shy, black-haired nurse peeks her head in, looking at me. She gasps at the
sight of Alyssa. “My God, sweetie! You’re so beautiful,” she says.

Alyssa’s smile stretches from ear to ear. “This is the nicest thing anyone has ever
done for me. Am I allowed to keep it on, or are they going to make me wash it off?”
Alyssa asks.

“I won’t let that happen.” I kneel at her bedside. “Hey, if I was a boy I’d date you
in a heartbeat!” She doesn’t answer, but I can tell she’s pleased as she turns her
face to view it from all angles.

Then with quiet humor she confesses, “I’ve never been on a date before and obviously
I’ll never get that chance.”

I look at her and smile. “Me neither, so I guess that makes us equal.” I laugh. Her
hand moves to cover her brand as she glances in the mirror again.

“Hold on one second.” I pull a sheet from the clean load.
No one will miss one sheet.
I rip it into a rough shape of what I want, throwing the shreds in the trash, all
while she watches.

“Okay, now just work with me. Lift your head for a second.” She raises her head, and
I wrap the sheet around her neck to cover her brand like a scarf. I tie a small knot
and look at her. “Now what do you think?” Tears creep out of her eyes and make small
paths down her face.

“Better,” is all she manages to say.

I drag the chair back to her bed, lift her, and tuck her in. She’s frail, and yet,
stronger than anyone I’ve ever met. Being with her opens my heart. Good people really
do exist here. That brings me to Cole—I don’t even know what to think of him.
A knock on the door interrupts our conversation and Sutton steps in.

“It’s after seven. Cole’s waiting for you.”

“For me?” Alyssa winks at him. “Just kidding.”

“All right.” I give her a hug. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Okay,” she says, still beaming.

When he shuts the door behind us, I realize I might not have time alone with Sutton
again until tomorrow, if he’s even around. “Can I ask you for a favor?”

“Depends on what the favor is,” he says.

I tell him my plan. He seems hesitant at first but then agrees it’d be the best thing
for Alyssa. Now, I have to talk to Cole and I’m more worried about his reaction. After
the past few weeks, I don’t want to push too much, but this situation calls for a
particular kind of compassion.

I saunter up to the desk where Cole and Zeus wait. He continues talking to Amber,
ignoring the fact that I stand behind him. I lean against the wall and watch until
the flirting session ends. Amber gets out of her chair, stands behind him rubbing
his shoulders and asks, “Do you want more to drink?”

Ugh. She might as well drool on his head while she’s at it.

She doesn’t even wait for a response. She walks to the fridge and bends over to grab
his water. I swear he checks out her backside.
Vomit.
Her pants slip down, showing a bright pink thong. I really didn’t need to see her
butt-floss, but there’s no way to avoid it.
She returns with his water and he sips it casually. Her triumphant eyes meet mine.

“Oh, didn’t see you there,” she exclaims with pure joy.

Cole turns around. “How long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough,” I say.

His face turns red with embarrassment. “I’ve been here since seven waiting for you,”
he says.

“I know,” I say.

He gets up, grabs my arm, and pulls me down the hall. He stops. “What’s wrong with
you?” He asks while pointing his finger in my face, and I have the slightest urge
to bite it. “When I give you an order, you obey it.” He gives me a stern look.

“I was finishing up with a patient, sorry. I’ll pay closer attention to the time from
now on,” I say. His expression changes and he releases his grip.

The truth is that time doesn’t matter to me when it comes to Alyssa. That girl has
changed me in so many ways.
Who ever knew a thirteen-year-old could teach me so many things?
She’s the only one who’s accepted me for who I am. It’s something I’ve never had,
and I’m not willing to let go, but I have to change my approach if I have any chance
of getting him to agree to my plan.

“I need to talk to you about something important but not here, okay?” I ask.

“And you’re telling me now… because?”

“I’m not sure really.” His face remains stubborn, but he nods, giving me permission.
I think.

After we arrive at our quarters, tension hangs in the air. This isn’t how I wanted
things to start. He changes his uniform, grabs a bottle of water, and stands stiffly
in the doorway to my room. Zeus lies beside me as I sit on my mattress, fearful of
setting Cole off.

“So what’s your deal?” he asks in between gulps from his bottle.

“I need a huge favor. Just hear me out before you answer, and just so you know, I
already asked Sutton and he gave me permission.”

He folds his arms across his chest and takes a deep breath. “Go on…”

I tell him about Alyssa, her sickness, and what she wants the most before the inevitable.
His head shakes “No” before I finish.

“No way. You’re not staying there!” He squeezes the bottle so tight that it crumples
in his fist. “We are not having this discussion. It’s completely out of the question.
Anything could happen if I’m not there. I won’t—”

I stand and close the distance between us. “I don’t mean tonight! Please, put yourself
in her shoes, even if it’s just for a second. She’s all alone in that God-awful place
and she’s petrified of dying. This is about her, not me. It’s a gift we can give her.
Damn it. She’s only thirteen,” I plead.

He shakes his head. “Any other guard would’ve beat or raped you by now, and you just
keep pushing me when I’m trying to do the right thing.” His face turns a purplish
red, and a vein in his neck bulges. “It’s bad enough that you’re on the radar with
my superiors. And you expect me to leave you there? You’ve lost your damn mind.”

“Believe me, I’m thankful I have you, but you have to understand… I promised her.
I promised her she wouldn’t die alone. I know you don’t understand, and I don’t expect
you to, but I don’t break promises. Ever. Look, if leaving me is the issue, then stay
with us. There are cots we can bring into her room and you can sleep behind the curtain
with Zeus and keep watch. That way I can be with her in case she needs me.”

He’s still shaking his head with his jaw clenched. I know he’s right. I’m asking a
lot of him, especially with the tension so high between us.

“How much time does she have?” he asks.

“Any day now, or next week.”

He closes his eyes for what seems like an eternity.

“Please—” I start to say.

“I’ll think about it, all right!” He exhales. “You have no idea what you’re asking
of me.” Then his face softens. “You must really care about her.”

I don’t know what overcomes me—joy, I suppose. I step into him and wrap my arms around
his waist. He stands motionless, but his heartbeat thumps in my ear, moving faster
and faster.

“I really do. She’s like a sister I’ve never had,” I say.

He squeezes my shoulders for an instant and then pushes me away, carefully avoiding
eye contact. I step back and exhale with relief. He’ll allow me this favor because
deep down there’s a side of him that’s decent and kind.

The rest of the evening remains quiet. Cole keeps to himself after our conversation,
almost like he needs time to digest it all. I watch him pack his bag: four shirts,
four pants, four pairs of boxer briefs and his shaving kit. I feel all giddy inside,
although his solemn expression forces me to withhold my triumphant emotions.
I think I touched a nerve.

He manages to say good night before he closes his door. And I begin to realize for
the first time how much security Zeus brings me when he lies down beside me. I find
it therapeutic to rub his head and receive his warmth in return. His presence seems
to scare away my nightmares and I sleep in peace.

*   *   *

We drive through the checkpoint at the training center, and this time I keep my mouth
glued shut. Our walk through the garage is uneventful. I perspire from the stress
and twirl one of my locks nervously as we enter the hospital. The whooshing of the
doors blows my hair back. His steps echo in the hallway and he looks engrossed while
pressing the eighth floor button.
It’s now or never.
I take a deep breath and ask him for one more favor.

“I’m scared to ask you—”

“No more favors.” He spins around and the angry gleam in his eyes melts into agony.

“It’s not for me. It’s for her.”

His lips turn thin and he folds his arms over. “I’m already risking too much.”

“It doesn’t involve me. It involves you.”

“No way, no more favors,” he says, raising an eyebrow.

“She’s never been on a date.” I hurry on before he can protest. “It’s something every
girl dreams of. She needs to be swept off her feet.”

Ding.
The elevator doors open and Zeus bolts into the hallway.

“You’re positively killing me. You know that, right?” Sarcasm boils over, but he gives
in with his next breath. “I’m not very good at this sort of thing.”

“I highly doubt that,” I say, accidentally brushing his hand with mine. He pauses
for a brief moment and his onyx eyes flash to his hand then jump to my eyes. Something
bubbles up within me. It’s weightless and yet foreboding. Whatever passes between
us in that moment runs deep. I clear my throat and knock on Sutton’s door.

“Come in,” he says. He speaks on the phone in a hushed tone. “Gotta go.” He hangs
up, swivels his chair, and raises his eyebrows. “Now what’s wrong?”

“Nothing. I spoke to Cole and he’s willing to stay.” Sutton looks at Cole and pauses
while evaluating his face. “Wonderful. Just make sure—”

“It’s all right, sir. I already got the clearances from my superiors last night,”
Cole says.

“Well, then I guess you should go see Alyssa. I won’t bother you unless I’m needed.”
He dismisses us with his hand and begins dialing a number on his phone. “Oh, and,
Cole, thank you. This little girl means a lot to me too.”

*   *   *

Alyssa musters as much excitement as she can. She falls in and out of sleep most of
the day, but at eleven thirty p.m., she’s perky.

“Are you up for a visitor?” I ask her.

“It’s almost midnight, who’d visit me now?” she asks me with a suspicious smile. Her
excitement makes me happy. Zeus’s nails click from behind the curtain and she tries
to peek underneath.

“Ready?” I ask.

She nods, scrunching her eyebrows, and trying to figure out who’s hiding behind the
curtain.

“Are you sure?” I stand at the curtain with my hand on it, waiting to reveal her surprise.
I laugh at her impatient expression.

“You’re killing me… Just open it!”

I slide open the curtain with painstaking slowness, giggling as she gives me a dirty
look. The candlelight hits them and Zeus bounds into the room without his manners,
peeking up at her, resting on his front two paws and swiping her small hand with a
giant slurp. Alyssa erupts into laughter.

“Hey,” Cole says as he follows behind Zeus.

I try to reply, but his appearance renders me speechless. He wears a pair of carpenter
jeans that sit on his waist and a white collared shirt. It’s slightly wrinkled, but
that doesn’t detract from how handsome he looks. The wind is sucked out of my lungs.
I’m drawn to him, and I don’t like it. His clean appearance, sweet demeanor, and the
fact that he nods and smiles at Alyssa with respect make my walls crumble a little.
I almost want him to be here for me, not her, but I quickly shove those thoughts away.
Thinking about it will only get me into trouble since it’s forbidden to even have
these feelings.