Shadows (6 page)

"Beautiful, are you okay? Are you even
breathing?" Those questions do not help and I only laugh harder. I
don’t care if he thinks I've gone mad. Then I let out a snort.
Immediately covering my face with my hands, I take some deep
breaths. I cannot believe I did that in front of him.

"If you are done, I'd like to help you up from
the floor now."

Taking my hands in his, he pulls me up. I
attempt to straighten out my shirt and tuck my now crazy locks
behind my ear. His hands move to the sides of my shoulders. He's
just standing there staring at me. We are inches apart. I can feel
his breath. He smells amazing. It's a kind of citrus and woodsy
smell, but underneath that is fresh linen. One last tear hits my
lip and I use my tongue to wipe it away.

Looking into Theron's eyes, I can clearly see
his intentions. He moves his hands to the side of my face, holding
me perfectly still. I take a breath as I feel his soft warm lips on
mine. He kisses me slowly across my mouth, corner to corner. Then
his lips part and I feel his tongue softly stroke my lips asking
for permission. My mouth opens to him, meeting his tongue with
mine. I have never been kissed like this. It's passionate and so
intense. My hands are running through his hair. He moves one hand
to the base of my neck and I moan into his mouth. The other one
runs over the fabric of my shirt as he cups my breasts. My nipples
are hard, pushing against the fabric of my bra. He breaks the kiss,
pressing our foreheads together, both of us gasping for air.
Running his thumb over my nipple through my shirt, his eyes meet
mine. I want him so incredibly bad.

"I shouldn't be taking advantage of you like
this. You've just lost a friend and I'm seeking you out like prey,
but I needed to kiss you." Not letting go, his thumbs stroke my
cheek. He just stares into my eyes.

"You're not taking advantage of me. This is me
willingly putting myself into your arms. Please, I hurt so badly.
It's killing me inside. I'm feel like I'm dying. I'm so cold and
numb. Then you touch me and my skin feels hot. It feels so
incredible. Don't stop, please, just don't stop." My voice falters
and I wipe my cheeks. I'm crying again. I just want to stop feeling
this pain.

"Beautiful," Theron kisses my tears away as
more fall down my cheeks, "I can make you feel so good. Do you want
to feel good, babe?" I nod my head in his hands. "Put your arms
around my neck, beautiful. I don't want you walking anywhere." I do
as he asks and he slides his arms around my back and under my ass.
I question his motives. Surely, he's not going to try and pick me
up. He doesn't try, he just does it. I wrap my legs around his
waist, clinging to him like he’s my life jacket. "If we do this,
babe, we can't come back from it. I'll make you feel, beautiful,
but I'm going to keep you."

I nod my head. I don't understand what he's
trying to say and I don't care. I don’t want to hurt anymore. He
carries me down the hall into his room. It's very modern looking.
The walls are deep blue, and all of his furniture is sleek and
black. He slowly lowers me to his bed. It's much bigger than the
one in the other room. It's soft and inviting, cradling me as I lay
back. I don't know his exact intentions, but I know
mine.

He's standing between my legs looking
absolutely amazing. My heart is beating so hard, I almost think he
can hear it. Sliding my shoes off, he rubs my feet. I moan, no one
has ever touched my feet before. He gives me a lopsided smile while
running his hand up my legs to the apex of my thighs. Slowly
popping the buttons he slides my jeans off, casually dropping them
to the floor. He's staring at me like I am a meal to consume, like
he wants to devour me. I squirm under his gaze. He runs his fingers
under the elastic of my striped cotton panties. They aren't sexy,
but he doesn't seem to care.

“
These will have to go, but first
your shirt. He pulls at the hem of the t-shirt I'm wearing as I sit
up. As he pulls it over my head, I hear him gasp. He runs one hand
down my neck and over my breasts pinching my nipple through my
white lace bra. "Take it off." I reach behind me and unclasp it,
sliding the straps down my arms until it falls to the floor. My
nipples are hard, my exposed flesh is prickling. "Fucking
beautiful. I'm going to taste you now." He pushes me back on the
bed. Taking one of my nipples into his mouth, his tongue swirls my
hard bud. He bites down and pain mixes with pleasure. I need more.
I start to pull at the hem of his shirt. I need it off. I want to
feel his flesh on mine. Letting go of my nipple with a pop he
throws his shirt across the room. "Are these next?" Theron asks
pointing to his jeans.

"Yes, I want to feel your skin on
mine."

He stands, kicking off his jeans with a
devilish grin. His black boxer briefs are tented from his erection.
Sliding his hands around his waist band, his boxers slide off
causing his erection to spring free. He stands completely nude,
stroking himself and I'm so incredibly turned on. I'm wet and
waiting for his touch.

"Your turn, beautiful." Hooking his fingers in
the side of my panties, he pulls them off tossing them to the side.
He crawls over me, supporting his weight on his hands and knees. He
leans down and our lips mash eagerly together. His tongue explores
every part of my mouth and I greedily let him. One hand is propping
him up. The other one roams down my body, stopping to explore my
nipples. His mouth leaves mine and soon my nipples are being
expertly teased. Taking turns between using his fingers and tongue,
he moves back and forth between my breasts, giving them equal
attention. My breathing is hard and erratic. The only thing I feel
is his touch electrifying every inch of my body. My heavy thoughts
are lifted. His hand leaves my breast and trails down my stomach to
my clit. Swirling his finger around my hard knot of nerves, he
slides it through my wet folds. This is amazing, my body is
buzzing.

"So wet, baby. So fucking wet." Thrusting two
fingers into me, he curls them up stroking my wall. I moan as I
watch him pull his fingers out, coated in my wetness, and suck them
into his mouth "Delicious. You taste so fucking good." His words
make my body clench. He's so incredibly sexy.

Slamming his fingers into my pussy, I moan in
pleasure, "Oh God!" I'm meeting him thrust for thrust with my hips.
I'm so close. I can feel the warmth spreading up my body. His mouth
moves to my clit, sucking and massaging it with his tongue. My legs
are shaking. I can't take anymore. He softly bites down and I lose
it. My back arching as I come. That was incredible and I feel like
I'm soaring. I notice he is placing soft kisses on the inside of my
thighs as the last of my orgasm ripples through me.

"You can call me God, beautiful, but I'd
rather hear my name come across those sexy lips." Moving slowly up
my body he softly places kisses on me as he goes, until he reaches
my lips. He runs his hand up my stomach towards my breasts and I
immediately suck it in. "Don't do that beautiful. Don't pull back
from me. I want to feel every inch of your sexy body. Don't try to
hide it from me again."

He bends down to kiss me, but nips my bottom
lip instead. Leaning over to the nightstand by his bed, he reaches
for something and I hear the sound of foil ripping. He kneels
between my legs. I watch as he slides the condom down his hard
cock. He's not 'Oh my God, I'm going to die by dick' big, but he's
definitely well endowed. He positions his tip at my entrance. I
can't wait anymore and I raise my hips to meet him. He eases into
me and stills. Lowering his lips to mine, he kisses me as he starts
slowly moving in and out. He is taking his time with me, but I need
more. Wrapping my legs around him, I push my heels into his ass. He
gets my point and picks up the speed. The last of my pain is
completely erased as he moves inside me.

"Oh, yes." This feels perfect. Sitting back on
his knees he pulls my legs over his shoulders. Continuing with his
movements, he leans forward just a little. It's so incredibly deep
this way.

"Oh! Theron, harder. Theron!" I'm panting and
I can feel my orgasm building. I feel walls clenching his hard cock
as it slams in and out of my pussy.

"Fuck, Eve. You. Feel. So. Fucking. Good."
Each word is emphasized by deep thrusts stroking my
core.

"Oh God, Theron!"

"Say it again, beautiful. Scream my
name."

"Don't stop!" His rhythm is relentless as he
pounds into me. My hands are fisting the sheets. "Theron!" His name
leaves my lips as my body spasms.

He grunts and I know he's with me. He releases
himself into me yelling my name. "Eve, oh fuck!" His body collapses
on me.

We are both out of breath. I am covered by
Theron. His body is hot, wet, and slick with sweat against mine.
Bracing himself with his forearms, one on each side of my head, he
looks down at me. He doesn't say anything. He just kisses me softly
and rolls to his side tying a knot in the condom and tossing it to
the small trash can on the floor. He pulls me up onto the pillow
beside him and his arms with his front to my back. I'm exhausted
and worn out. Laying there trying to steady my breathing, I welcome
the sleep that comes to claim me.

Chapter 4

E
verything is red. I know I'm looking for someone, but
I can't see them. My vision starts to come into focus, and I see
it’s my hands that are red. Looking down I see Matt staring up at
me. His eyes and chest are motionless. I'm screaming for someone,
anyone to help me. People keep walking past and then suddenly we
are surrounded by bright lights. I can hear people talking and they
take Matt from me. I scream at them to fix him. I desperately want
him back. They lay him on bed and close dark grey curtains around
him. Someone is holding me back and I drop to my knees. I'm begging
for someone to help me. I'm screaming and no one is listening. Sobs
wrack my body as I completely lose my mind.

"Eve, shh. Eve, its okay. It’s over. I have
you, babe. Open your eyes for me."

I wake up to Theron holding me against his
chest while rocking me back and forth. I'm crying uncontrollably.
Wrapping my hands around him, I bury my face in his neck. He tucks
my hair behind my ears and makes soft circles on my back with his
hands. He says nothing as he holds me while I cry.

I have no idea how long we sit like this. My
legs, bent underneath me, are starting to go numb. I need to
stretch my muscles, but I feel so incredibly weighted down. Taking
a deep breath, I lift my head to look up at him. I study his face
rubbing my hands across it. His jaw is perfectly squared and his
stubble is so soft under my fingers. Stopping at his lips, I rub my
thumb across them as he presses a soft kiss on it. I run my hands
through his hair as I look into his amazing eyes. One is such a
bright green and the other is such a deep golden brown. They
mesmerize me. I press my forehead against his. He feels so right,
but I feel so guilty.

"I shouldn't be feeling like this." I bite my
bottom lip trying to hold back tears.

He looks straight into my eyes. "Feeling like
what, babe? It's okay to hurt. It's okay to grieve."

"No, that's not what I mean at
all."

"Then, what?"

"It's you, damn it. I shouldn't be feeling
happy or warm or comforted. I shouldn't be rolling around laughing
on some guy's floor I just met. I shouldn't be having sex with
someone when I just watched my friend die in my arms only a few
hours ago. I just shouldn't. "

"Why shouldn't you? I'm not saying everything
should be fucking sunshine and butterflies, but you are allowed to
feel, Eve. You have to. I know this hard. It fucking sucks, but you
have done nothing wrong." He lifts my chin with his fingers. "You
have done nothing wrong. Tell me, Eve, tell me you know you have
done nothing wrong."

"I can't. I fucking can't!" Screaming at him,
I smack his hands away. I stand up and frantically get dressed. As
I pull on his t-shirt over my head, I turn to face him. He's
sitting on the bed staring at me with a hurt look in his eyes. I
don’t know if it's for me or caused by me.

"Tell me, Eve. Tell me you haven't done
anything wrong." Pulling his jeans up, he walks over to me. He
reaches for me and I push him away. I don't want to be touched. I
don't want to feel this good, when I know I shouldn't
be.

"I said I fucking can't, okay? What the hell
do you want from me? I feel so guilty. I can't help the way I feel,
Theron. I want to go home and I can't. I want to call my best
friend and I can't. I can't because he's fucking dead! He's fucking
dead because, I couldn't love him the way he needed me to. I
couldn't be his person and I hate myself for it. I just want him
back. Please, Theron, please. I just want him back."

"Babe, I'm sorry. I can’t bring him back for
you and I think you know that. It's okay to feel angry and hurt.
What do you mean by your person?" He pulls me to him and I let him.
I never had a choice. My body would have gone to him anyways. He's
rubbing his hands up my shoulders, almost like he's trying to warm
me up. I don't feel cold. I feel hot and angry, but my body shivers
anyways.

"Matt said I was the one person he was meant
to love. He said he loved me." I touch my fingers to my lips. Was
it just last night when he confessed his feelings to me? It feels
so long ago. "He kissed me and I didn't kiss him back." I wrap by
arms around Theron's neck. He picks me up and I bury my head into
his neck as I cry. He carries me into the living room and sets me
down on the couch. Grabbing my purse off the ottoman, he fishes for
my phone.