See the Light (6 page)

Patrick couldn’t stop thinking about Jason. This was even worse than before they’d decided to meet in Trenton. Now he really knew what the man felt like, what he tasted like. What they’d done before at the camp had just been an appetizer before their hotel tryst, and like a chocoholic who’s just discovered a mountain of candy bars, Patrick needed more.

He found himself texting Jason the next day after he’d had to excuse himself from a conversation since he had no idea what the other man, an assistant trainer in Philly, was saying. Luckily the trainer seemed to chalk it up to Patrick’s dueling priorities. His priorities were skewed all right, but not the way everyone thought.

Sounded innocuous enough. Jason answered a few moments later.
What’s up?
Looking down at himself with a rueful smile, he answered.

Something for you.
Picturing the silly grin most likely plastered all over Jason’s face, Patrick smiled too.
Oh yeah?
Patrick chuckled.
Very much so.
Several moments later another text came.
And what’s your plan to take care of your problem?
With a derisive laugh, Patrick wrote back,
Find a quiet, private place at the arena to jerk off?
It took another length of time for Jason to answer, and Patrick began to wonder if he’d said or done something wrong.
Sorry, had to close my phone quick. Nosy assholes around here… So you’re gonna jerk off at the arena? Dude, that’s bold.
He nodded. It was bold. And potentially crazy.
Not much choice. You drove me insane yesterday, and my dick won’t let me forget it.
Reaching for a towel in the private coach’s bathroom area, Patrick waited for the reply.
I don’t recall you complaining. ;-)
Groaning, he wrote back.
That wasn’t a complaint. It was a fact. Any way I can see you again?
He felt like a fifteen-year-old girl who’d just asked the most popular boy in class to the homecoming dance. Not a comfortable thing, and when Jason wrote back a couple of minutes later, Patrick released a long, slow breath before reading it.
Not sure. Will let you know.
Disappointment washed over Patrick, but he tried like hell to ignore it. Going into this thing, he’d known how hard it would be to see each other. Both of them traveled with their respective teams, and getting away for an extended day trip wasn’t often in the cards. Didn’t make it any less easy to take. What could he say, though?

A few seconds later another text came.
Later, man.
Patrick put his phone down and leaned his head on the cold tiled wall behind him. Already he craved the man. There was no way this was going to end well. Yet the more he thought about Jason, the more convinced he became it would be impossible to walk away.
The weeks passed, and the two men’s schedules didn’t mesh enough for them to be able to see each other. Patrick grew more and more frustrated. His texts to Jason were carefully crafted to sound casual and not put pressure on him, since he had a strong feeling that if Jason were cornered, he’d bolt. He thought he’d succeeded too well with the casual thing, though, when Jason didn’t answer a text for nearly a week, and was surprised by how bummed he felt.

When Jason did finally reply, he explained he’d had food poisoning and had been out of commission for four days and then trying to work himself back into game shape. Patrick laughed out loud in relief when he read the text. If he’d bothered to look Jason up online, he would’ve known he hadn’t been in the lineup and why. Sometimes his dick made him such an idiot.

The next set of texts from Jason said that once the afternoon game on the day after Thanksgiving finished, he was free until Sunday morning, since their coach had given the team a day off. Jason’s parents wouldn’t be able to make it to New Jersey for Thanksgiving, so he had no plans. He wanted to know if Patrick wanted to meet again, and the thought of maybe spending an entire twenty-four-hour period alone with Jason left him giddy. He made the hotel reservation and then counted down the days—almost two and a half weeks— until he’d see Jason again.

In the back of his mind he knew he shouldn’t be cultivating this relationship. If the good folks at USA Hockey found out about it, he’d be kicked off the advisory committee for sure. There was at least a decent chance he’d lose his NHL scouting job too. At least the kid was of age. And would he be able to keep his sexuality a secret if anyone found out? He wasn’t in the limelight like he was when he’d been playing, so he wasn’t necessarily worried for himself.

But Jason was an up-and-coming star. Being found out could go very badly for him. Patrick tried not to think about the possible ramifications of continuing this affair. If Jason wasn’t worried enough to end things, he supposed he shouldn’t be either. Then he wondered if Jason was justifying things in his own head the same way Patrick was. As the older, more mature man, Patrick should be taking the risks more seriously. He resolved to talk to Jason about it.

Patrick was already on the road to Trenton when he realized driving straight there would cause him to be an hour and a half early, even if he ate lunch on the way. Blowing out a breath, he decided he didn’t care. After stopping for a leisurely lunch, he went on to Trenton and walked into their room at twenty minutes before two in the afternoon. He flipped through the channels on the television for a while and then decided to shower. Since he had so much time, he decided some manscaping was in order, so he pulled out a toiletry case from the small duffle bag he’d brought and spent the time waiting for Jason trimming his chest hair and pubes.

A knock at the door signaled Jason’s arrival a little before five, and Patrick smiled to himself. Jason must’ve hightailed it there directly from the arena. Maybe he was as anxious as Patrick. When he opened the door and Jason shoved him inside, he had his answer. Luckily he caught himself, because Jason gave him no time to recover before the man was pulling at Patrick’s clothes and cleaning his tonsils quite thoroughly.

Finally Patrick was able to push away enough to pull in desperately needed oxygen. “Jesus.”

Patrick held up a hand. “Don’t apologize. I just wasn’t expecting it.”
The other man frowned. “I don’t know why I lost control like that. I just…I…” Jason ran a hand through his hair, staring at the floor.
“Hey, hey,” he replied, placing a hand on the man’s suddenly tense shoulder. “I’m not a girl.” Jason snorted, and Patrick rolled his eyes. “What I meant was, I’m not gonna break. I like that you lost control. I was worried I was the only one who was going nuts not seeing you.”
“I tried to find some free time, but I’m getting pulled in a million different directions.”
His frustration was obvious in the set of his mouth and the tone of his voice, and Patrick pulled him into a gentle hug.
“Don’t worry about it, kid. You’re here now.” Leaning back to look into Jason’s eyes, he continued. “You can stay, right?”
“Yes, thank God.”
“Good. What are we standing around here dressed, then?”
“I have no idea. I want you naked.”
“Ditto.” Each removed the rest of their clothing before coming together in another kiss, their tongues still dueling but with less frenzy than before. Breaking the kiss, Patrick admitted, “I missed you.”
Jason smiled. “Missed you too. Really missed this.”
He ran his hand down Patrick’s torso and then bent down to pull one of his nipples into his mouth.
Straightening once more, he said, “I might be ready to, you know.”
Patrick raised an eyebrow.
“You’re gonna make me say it, aren’t you?”
“Well, yes, but not only to hear it. I want to be sure I understand what you’re saying.”
Turning away, the other man began to walk away and then stopped. With his back to Patrick, he said, “I want you to fuck me.”

Spots appeared in Patrick’s vision. His good intentions to have a heart-toheart with Jason flew out the window as the blood rushed south. “Are you sure?”

Please be sure. Please be sure.
Jason nodded. “Yeah.”
“You don’t sound sure.” The last

“I am. I even, um, bought a couple of things.” His feet shuffled on the carpet.

“Oh?”
“Yeah. I’ve been using a plug. I started with a small one, and now I’m up to the medium one.”

“A plug?” The last word was little more than a squeak. Patrick grabbed the wall as his legs turned to jelly. This man was a living wet dream.

Jason turned once more, the color in his cheeks high as one side of his mouth kicked up. “Yeah.”

“Fuck me.” Patrick drew out the last word, his brain flashing images at him, each one more X-rated than the last.

“Well, I can do that too, but I thought it might help my nerves if you went first.” Jason smirked. “So to speak.”

“I know, but I do think it would help. It’s not that I wanna ‘get it over with’ or anything,” he answered, using air quotes, “but I might psyche myself out if we wait.”

Walking to the bed, he stopped in front of Patrick, putting him at eye level with Jason’s erection. The fact that the kid was still hard was a good sign. If he was losing it, Patrick would’ve had misgivings, but his dick appeared rock solid and was leaking precum. Patrick licked over the head, and Jason moaned.

“How do you want me?”
“The easiest for you is on your hands and knees.” Patrick watched, his lust practically a living, breathing thing as Jason glided onto the bed and presented his firm ass. Patrick couldn’t resist leaning forward to place a bite and then a soft kiss on it. Like a typical hockey player, Jason had a nice, tight, strong ass, and Patrick couldn’t freaking wait to sink inside it. But first things first. He needed to prepare him. Good thing he’d been hopeful and brought plenty of lube and condoms. “You are perfection.”
“I don’t know about that.”
Patrick rose and went to the bag he’d thrown on the desk. After withdrawing the lube and a string of condoms, he returned to the bed. When his lubed finger ringed around Jason’s anus, the younger man startled. “Shhh, you’re okay.”
“I know. It was just cold. I trust you. You won’t hurt me. After all, I could kick your ass with one hand tied behind my back.”
He knew the statement had only been made to bolster Jason’s confidence, and wasn’t worried about any physical confrontations with the man, but Patrick assured him, “I won’t hurt you. I’ll prepare you well and go as slow as you need me to.”
Jason nodded. “Do it.”
Pushing one finger slowly inside, Patrick asked, “Okay?”
“Yeah. That’s even smaller than the little plug. I’m all right. Seriously. I’ve, uh, been wearing the medium plug a couple of hours a day for the past three days.”
Patrick groaned. “You
will
be the death of me.”
“Just don’t croak in the middle, eh, old man? That would definitely kill the mood.”
He burst out laughing, sure Jason was reveling in screwing with him. “I would think so. You ready for more?”
“Go for it.”
He added a second finger and very slowly sawed in and out, doing his best to ignore the tight heat. If he paid too much attention to it now, he wouldn’t last ten seconds when he finally got inside the man.
“How does it feel?”
“Pretty good. No pain.”
“Excellent. Let’s see how you like”—Patrick ran his fingers over Jason’s prostate, and he bucked—“that.”
“Oh,
fuck
.” The other man drew out the word and pounded the bed once. A moment later he said, “I mean, I knew that was there, obviously, but I’d never been on the receiving end.”
Chuckling, Patrick moved over the small bud again and again.
After taking a deep breath, Jason said, “I can see why guys like this so much.”
Reaching around Jason with his free hand, Patrick then jacked him a couple of times. “That they do.”
“Fuck me, Patrick. I want it.” Jason turned his head and stared into Patrick’s eyes. “Please.”
With another groan Patrick pulled his fingers out, slid on the condom, lubed it, and then quickly washed his hands before returning to the bed. “Like I said, you set the pace. It’s probably going to burn a little, but it’ll get better.”
“I got it.”
Patrick moved behind him and grabbed his dick, placing the head at the other man’s entrance. Rubbing Jason’s back with his free hand, he said, “Nice and slow…” Calling up every ounce of patience he possessed, Patrick began to push and felt himself pop through a bit of resistance. “Okay?”
“Yeah, keep going.”
He moved a little farther inside and heard Jason’s breath catch, but the younger man didn’t tell him to stop, so he kept going, inching his way inside until his full balls rested on Jason’s ass. “I’m in. You’re so tight, babe. You’re gonna kill me.”
“Move. Shit, I need you to move.”
Jason’s voice was rough with what Patrick hoped was desire, and Patrick took the opportunity to pull out and push back in.
“Yeah, that’s it…feels so good.”
“You sure?”
Patrick knew Jason wouldn’t lie to him. Why would he bother? Despite that, he felt like he had to know for sure, had to know Jason was enjoying this as much as Patrick was.
“I’ve never…”
Jason paused and then pushed back, and Patrick’s breath stuttered.
“Fuck, this is incredible. I wouldn’t do it with just anybody, but I really didn’t know it could be like this.”
He sounded incredulous, and Patrick wasn’t sure if he should laugh or kiss the other man senseless. Jason made the choice for him. He turned to Patrick.
“Kiss me.”
Holding up his weight with one hand on the bed, Patrick steadied himself with the other on Jason’s shoulder as he leaned in to do just that. Then he settled his body over Jason’s, one hand on the bedspread on each side of him, and thrust with slow, measured movements.
“So good…”
Noticing the younger man’s dick was still rock-hard, he asked, “Can you maneuver enough to touch yourself?”
Jason gave a grunt. “Not sure I want to.”
Patrick stopped. “Why?”
“Damn it, fuck me, Patrick! Because I wanna concentrate on this.”
He couldn’t stop the chuckle. “I doubt you’d get too distracted.”
“If I was pulling on my cock, I would.”
“I want you to come.”
“And I will,” Jason answered with an exasperated sigh, “as soon as you do.”
He couldn’t argue with that logic. “Can I go faster?”
“Shit, yeah. Harder, faster, yes. I want it.”
“You like it a little rough?”
Jason barked out a laugh. “I’m a two-hundred-plus-pound professional hockey player. What do
you
think?”
“Then hold on.” Patrick reared up onto his knees and grabbed Jason’s hips in a bruising grip. “You want me to fuck you? I’ll fuck you.” He pulled the other man back onto his dick again and again, and Jason went with it, using his own momentum to help Patrick along. Soon the sounds of flesh slapping together filled the room, along with myriad grunts and groans from both men. “Come.”
“Can’t.”
“Yes. You. Can.” Patrick nailed Jason’s prostate on each word, and the other man cried out. “Fucking come for me.” Pushing inside so far he saw stars, Patrick went over, his teeth clacking together and his head thrown back. Vaguely he heard Jason get his own release, and much as he would’ve liked to have watched as Jason came for the first time with a dick buried in his ass, it was impossible, so he concentrated on not passing out as Jason’s tight ass contracted around him.
Mindful of the condom, Patrick pulled out immediately but took his time doing so, knowing it could be painful for Jason. As he left the bed, Patrick’s eyes stung. Jason had trusted him enough to let him do this. Knowing Jason’s past as the other man had explained it to him, Patrick was truly touched he had trusted him enough to allow this to happen.
He took a few moments in the bathroom to compose himself before grabbing a warm washcloth to take back to bed. Jason was on his back, his spent cock lying against his thigh and one arm thrown over his face.
“Want this?”
Jason moved his arm enough to look at what was in Patrick’s hand. He nodded. “Yeah, thanks, man. Tissues really weren’t getting it done.”
Patrick wiped Jason down with the washcloth before lying down beside him. “I want a nap.”
Jason chuckled. “Sure, old man. Did I wear you out? Should I get your cane so you don’t break a hip if you need to get up?”
Patrick elbowed the younger man. “Be nice, or I’ll make you sleep on the wet spot.”
“Make me? You and what army?”
Patrick elbowed him again. Before he could even take another breath, Jason was on top of him, straddling him as he pushed both arms over Patrick’s head.
Grinning, Jason said, “Hmm. I kinda like this. You’re at my mercy now. What should I do with you?”
“I’m sure you have a few ideas,” Patrick answered with a smirk. Why was it that every side Jason revealed was sexier than the last? Shit, he had it bad.
Jason leaned down, and, increasing the pressure on their joined hands as he put more weight on them, kissed Patrick. “That was pretty fucking good, but I think I need your ass too.”
Patrick stared up into Jason’s liquid brown eyes and shuddered. “You can have it.”
“Cold?”
“Yeah, a little,” Patrick lied.
He wasn’t about to tell Jason the thought of being overpowered while Jason pounded into his ass was a huge turn-on. Patrick wasn’t submissive by any means, but since he was usually bigger and stronger than the men he had sexual encounters with, the idea of a guy who could not only hold his own but quite possibly bend Patrick to his will was pretty fucking intoxicating. He felt the strength in Jason’s grip holding his hands above his head. There was no doubt if the younger man really wanted to, he could take control.
“Why don’t you get under the covers?” Jason suggested. “We can take a little nap and then maybe order some room service. I know
I
worked up an appetite.”
Jason grinned, and Patrick found himself smiling back. “You’d nap with an old man?”
Jason shrugged, and Patrick was sure a smart-ass retort was coming. He wasn’t disappointed.
“Sure, as long you keep your teeth in. I’d hate to wake up looking at a jacko’-lantern. That shit freaks me out.”
They got into bed, and Patrick wondered how Jason would react if Patrick tried to spoon him. Deciding it was better not to rock the boat for now, Patrick put his back to the middle of the bed. Long moments passed as Patrick tried to will himself to sleep, way too aware of the warm body behind him to settle down. He could hear Jason’s breathing, and it didn’t sound like he had fallen asleep either.
He was trying to decide if he should just give up on sleep when a strong male arm snaked around his waist. Jason snugged his body up tight against Patrick’s, and Patrick forgot how to breathe. It had been so long since he’d done this, since he’d cuddled with another man, and he’d forgotten how good it felt. Finally at peace, he grabbed Jason’s hand and drifted off to sleep.