Saving My Submission BN (20 page)

He’d actually felt it.
What did it mean?

“Look, I’m sorry I panicked. I’m confused… I think
you’ve ruined me.”

“Ruined you? How?” He blinked, shocked by my claim.

“After that first night… Scotty…I didn’t understand
how… Oh god, I’m screwing this all up.”

“You were with Scotty? Scotty from Maurizio’s?”

“Yes… I mean no. I didn’t want to be with him… he
wanted…”

A knowing grin tugged the corners of his mouth. “You
did what I did, didn’t you?”

All the tension fell from my face. “I don’t know. What
did you do?”

“Last night I was supposed to be with the guys at
Tony’s bachelor party, but I bowed out. You knocked me clean off plumb the
night before. I’d been seeing someone for a few weeks, so I called her. I
thought I could…” He gave a sheepish shrug. “Fuck you out of my system.”

Boy, that sounded
familiar.

“But sitting with her at dinner, I couldn’t stop
comparing her to you. The shape of her face wasn’t right. Her eyes were the
wrong color. Her laugh sounded like fighting chickens. I faked a headache and
cut the night short. When I got home I lay in bed—the bed we’d shared—and
relived every single second I’d had you with me.”

“But you knew who I was... you knew how to find me.
Why didn’t you just come to the house?”

“For the same reason you ran away from me, Mellie. You
scared the shit out of me.” His face fell; he looked… lost. “What happened with
Scotty?”

“Nothing. I didn’t try to have sex with him,” I
assured. “He kissed me at the bachelorette party and it felt so wrong I wanted
to gag. I shoved him off me and told him no. He wasn’t being a jerk or
anything; in fact, he apologized. It didn’t make sense; I mean… you’d done
something to me. Okay, look, I met Scotty the night before and… I can’t lie… I
probably would have gone to bed with him, eventually. But after being with you…
I couldn’t stand the thought of being with him. What the hell did you do to me?
God, none of this makes sense.”

Joshua chuckled. “No, it doesn’t. It’s a strange and
wonderful feeling, isn’t it?”

“Yes, but…” A sense of foreboding landed in my gut. “But,
you and me…it’s never going to work. You know that right?”

He didn’t answer, just clenched his jaw.

“It can’t, Joshua, no matter how badly we… I live in
Phoenix… I have a company to run. I can’t just close up shop and shuck off my
responsibilities for some crazy-assed connection that we don’t even understand.
Seriously, it might just be the right combination of hormones and
testosterone.”

“I know.” He nodded. Disappointment flickered in his
eyes. I felt the same hollow ache inside. “After what you said at the wedding
reception, I tried to rationalize away my attraction to you. But when I’m with
you, all rationale goes straight out the window. I want you, Mellie… want you
for as many days as I can have you.”

“I want you too,” I sighed. “I haven’t felt this
ridiculous since high school.”

“Look. We don’t have to figure this out right now. Not
tomorrow or the next day. Things happen for a reason, and while we don’t know
what that reason is yet, let’s just relax and let it happen. It’ll reveal
itself in time.”

“And you don’t think all this is a little insane?” I
asked, arching a brow at his passive acceptance.

“Oh, it’s as crazy as a shit house rat, but…” He
shrugged. “Instead of trying to analyze the piss out of it, let’s just see
where it takes us.”

“Where it takes us?” I gasped. “I feel like I bought a
one-way ticket on a runaway freight train. I know where it’s going to take us.”

“No, you suspect. Look, instead of freaking out, try
to take comfort in the fact that I’m on the damn thing too. If it goes down in
flames, I’ll be right there beside you, okay?”

The inevitable end to this surreal bliss plowed
through me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and held on. Willingly jumping on
board, I knew I was in for a hell of a ride. I just hoped in the end it would
all be worth it.

Without a word, Joshua picked me up and carried me to
his bed. Silently holding me in his arms, I tried to sort my stormy emotions.
I’d only known the man a few short days, but the instant attraction we shared
was outrageous.

Trying to pacify all the riotous emotions, I worked on
convincing myself that once I returned home and settled into a regular routine,
the craziness would pass. But all that did was bring a stab to my heart with a
well-honed blade. I didn’t want this to end. I wanted what I couldn’t have…
Joshua.

The day had been a rollercoaster of emotions, but in a
way our conversation felt cathartic. At least we shared the same mystified
emotions, and lying in Joshua’s arms as he threaded his fingers through my hair
felt better than right… it felt like perfection.
 

The fringes of sleep tried to pull me under, but
Joshua’s soft lips drew me back to the surface.

“Make love to me,” I whispered on a wistful sigh.

“How could I refuse such a lovely request?” he
murmured.

Inching his lean body over mine, I moaned at the feel
of his hot, soft skin. Our bodies meshed together, and strangely, it felt more
profound than the first time. His kisses were slower, more passionate; his
touches teemed in adoration. The methodical way he unraveled me was the
complete opposite from our rush to rut, a few short days ago.
 

“
Mmmm
,
yesssssss
,”
I purred as his long, sure fingers toyed with my folds.

“You’re so soft, and silky, and so fucking wet. Oh…
the things I want to do to you, Mellie.”

Joshua’s words came out raspy and low. Driving his
fingers deep inside, he sent my desire spiraling high and hard.

“
Pleaseee
,” I whimpered. “Do
anything you want.”

A roguish fire flickered in his eyes. “Anything?”

“
Yess
,” I hissed. My
frustration clawed deep.

“Be careful what you ask for, girl.”

“I’m not asking. I’m begging.”

Easing his fingers out my pussy, he stared at the
glistening juice on his digits. Drawing his hand to his mouth, he licked them
clean, savoring the flavor as if it were the finest nectar in the world.
Feeling coveted and treasured, I was rattled to the bone.

Reaching down, Joshua dragged his broad thumbs over my
nipples. “I want to lose myself in you, little one. It’s been a long time since
I’ve craved a woman as much as I do you.”

His confession pressed in on me from all sides. A
blistering torrent of emotions suffused my heart. I’d never hungered for a man
the way I did him. It was all consuming.

“Take me. Please?”

Bending low, he granted my request, claiming me in a
ravenous kiss as he took control. Floating his lips and tongue down my body in
whisper-soft strokes, he edged closer to my needy cleft. My belly rippled as
the muscles twitched beneath his sensual indulgence.

Repositioning himself between my legs, Joshua parted
them with gentle persuasion, then closed his eyes and inhaled a deep breath. A
slow smile of gratitude curled his lips. Gazing upon my sex, I knew what he
planned to do, and I couldn’t help but rock my hips, impatient to feel his
tongue on my sex.

Sliding a hungry stare over my body, his expression
was tight, rugged, and ruthless, totally incongruent to the calming stroke of
his fingertips up and down my inner thighs.

“So anxious. So needy. So fucking gorgeous,” Joshua
lauded before leaning low.

His warm breath spilled over my pussy and I twitched.
Placing a wide palm low on my belly, he held me to the bed before swiping his
tongue up my folds. As he groaned in delight, my whole body quivered. With long
and deliberate strokes, Joshua lapped at my labia, scraped his teeth over my clit,
methodically driving me out of my mind. He was in no hurry, seemingly content
to drive me up the mountain of ecstasy, one agonizing stroke at a time.

“I could stay here all night long, drinking in your
sweet, slick juice, little one. You taste so warm and tart, it makes me dizzy.”

Floating on a cloud of surreal splendor, Joshua sailed
me even higher when he inched his fingers back inside me. Curling and circling,
he beckoned the growing fire as he crept deeper still. He pinpointed that
secret bundle of nerves and I whimpered as he stroked the screaming tissue.
Writhing and moaning, I ground my pussy against his mouth and hand. Circling my
clit with his tongue, he purposefully prolonged the exquisite agony, and the
maddening torture was glorious. I didn’t want it to end.

“Your cunt is sweltering,” he murmured against my
folds. “And the way your silky tunnel sucks at my fingers… it feels incredible,
baby. Fucking incredible. My cock’s so jealous right now.”

Each raspy syllable vibrated straight up my spine.

“Please,” I begged. “I need…”

“You need what, little one? Tell me.”

Even as he asked the question, his tongue didn’t stop
dancing its taunting trail alongside my clit.

“I need to come, Sir. Please.” The desperation in my
voice was shocking, even to my own ears.

“Yes, I know you do.” Joshua increased the tempo of
his coaxing stroke. “You’re going to give it to me, because I demand it from
you, little one. And I want it. Now. Right now. Come for me, girl.” he
commanded in a harsh roar.

Latching my throbbing clit between his lips, Joshua
sucked. The pool of blood behind the tender nub seemed to expand and the
muscles in my legs tightened and trembled. I tried to arch from the bed, but
his powerful hand held me down.

His wicked fingers strummed.

His ravenous mouth consumed.

A sizzling ball of electricity shot through my limbs,
collided with my brain, and slammed down my spine. Shards of light exploded
behind my eyes, and I threw my head back, screaming to the heavens as I
shattered all over his face.

Contracting, my tunnel sucked at his fingers in brutal
spasms. Still, Joshua didn’t relent. He continued licking my clit while his
fingers churned in silent demand for more.

“Again,” he bellowed. “I want to drink you in… possess
every drop of you, girl.”

Another wave started cresting over the one still
annihilating me. Helpless, I swirled in the eye of the cyclone as Joshua drove
me up, fast and hard. Streaking to the crest once more, I fisted my hands in
his hair, holding on for dear life, and sailed over the edge. Shrieking, the
convulsing explosion felt as if it had obliterated every cell in my body.

Boneless, panting, and spent, I felt Joshua crawl up
from between my thighs. Lifting my heavy eyelids, I watched as he smiled and
licked my offering from his lips before wiping his chin on the back of his
hand. A sated smile curled one side of my mouth as he reached up and brushed
strands of sweat-soaked hair from my face.

“God, you’re amazing,” he praised, gazing at me as if
I were the most beautiful creature on the planet.

“No,” I choked out on a hoarse whisper. “You’re the
amazing one… the things you do to me…”

“I’ve only just begun to unravel you, little one.”

A twinkle of delight danced in his eyes as an
aftershock rippled through me. Oh yes, he’d unravel me, all right. I just
prayed that his masterful hands would be able to weave me back together when we
were through.

I managed to lift one limp arm and drape it around his
shoulder before pulling his mouth to mine. Tasting my essence on his tongue,
Joshua bathed me in a poignant kiss so brimmed with emotion I felt tears
burning the back of my eyes.

Careful. You’re in over
your head.

As if challenging my internal warning, I moaned and
fell deeper into his kiss. Shifting his weight, Joshua positioned his body over
mine. The heat of his steely erection pressed against my stomach, igniting the
fires I thought had been extinguished.

His unique sexual magic left me utterly amazed. He’d
taken me from quenched to parched with just a kiss and the touch of his body. I
was unaccustomed to such unrelenting pleasure; Joshua stoked an insatiable side
I didn’t know existed. But I knew one thing: I’d never get my fill of the man.

“Whatever this is…
whatever it means, we’ll sort it out.”

His reassuring words sang in my brain as he reached
out and palmed a condom from the nightstand. I put my ponderings to rest as he
sheathed his stunning shaft.

“Fuck. You test my control, little one. The need to be
gentle and not hurt you battles with my demand to consume you,” he hissed
through clenched teeth. Stroking his thick shaft as if trying to soothe its
ache, he edged in, aligning the wide crest with my swollen folds.

“Don’t be gentle. I won’t break. I need to feel all of
you, again.”

He lunged inside me, fast and hard. That unforgettable
burn flared through my core and rippled like a bubbling brook. Joshua stilled
and I held my breath, struggling to relax my quivering passage and accept his
glorious invasion.

“Christ, girl. You’re strangling me,” he growled.

“I’m not trying to,” I gasped, closing my eyes to
focus past the exquisite sting.

“It’s okay. I’m not complaining. Trust me. I’m going
to stay right here until you relax and give me room to move in that pretty
pussy of yours.”

I tried to widen my thighs, but it only served to
stretch my searing flesh further. I hissed and bit back a curse.

“Easy, baby. There’s no rush,” he whispered.

Circling my nipples with his tongue, he flicked the
hard tips. I moaned and pressed my lower back into the mattress, then drew up
my legs and wrapped them around his narrow hips. The pain had lessened even as
Joshua wedged in deeper. I closed my eyes, enveloped in sensations too
wonderful for words.

He slanted his mouth over mine and we became fused
together in every way possible. I wasn’t sure where I ended and Joshua began,
until he started slowly rocking in and out of me and the universe seemed to
settle into an unfathomable rightness.