Saving Me (Finding You #3) (17 page)

Chapter

Thirty-Four

Dakota

Minutes became hours. Hours became days. I didn’t know any more. Time was irrelevant. The constant stream of waking and sleeping. Eating sporadically and being put on a bedpan. That’s right. No more trips to the bathroom for now. I was struggling with things and I guess the powers that be figured it was just too much effort on my behalf to walk or even get wheeled down the hall to take care of my business. My mind felt full of fluff, like I couldn’t think. I just seemed to be existing and no more. Maybe whatever they kept injecting into the drip was keeping me in a waking coma.

It must have been the next day because night had fallen and the sun had risen again. I imagined they would all eventually bleed into each other, one giant chunk of time only separated by light and dark.

No one apart from the nursing staff had visited since yesterday when I got to see Joseph.

I wondered what Kyle was doing. Someone mentioned that I wasn’t allowed visitors for a couple of days so I guessed that was why he hasn’t tried to see me. There was no emotion connected to the thought. It was merely an observation.

It was strange not to feel anything. To have thoughts come and go while disconnected. I’d always been an over-thinker and carried my heart on my sleeve, so to have those I cared about fill my head without any emotion attached to them at all was like being outside my body as a silent observer. Is that what mental patients felt like? Detached from everything and everyone?

I should be grateful for the eradication of anything remotely resembling sentiment.

The next day continued on in the same manner, routine and unproductive…my memory retaining just snippets of wakefulness.

Sometime when the light outside started to dim, a nurse popped in, breezing her way across to me, a light air about her gait. I recognized her as Sky.

“Hey honey. How are you doing?”

I stared at her a moment, organizing her words into a coherent sentence I could understand as my mind worked to fight the jumbled haze in my head. “Okay, I guess.”

“Are you up for a visitor?”

I shrugged, nonchalantly. “Maybe.”

“I think you’ll want to see this person. He’s been anxiously awaiting clearance to come visit you.”

“Okay.” It was bland and flat. I was talking like the zombie I felt.

My gaze returned to nothing in particular as the nurse shuffled around, opening the door and then moving something large through it.

Turning my head, my eyes met a set of crystalline rivers of blue. Tousled hair, full, sculptured mouth that was upturned at the corners on a face that was overflowing with tenderness. Kyle.

We held each other’s stare until Kyle was sitting beside the bed, the nurse leaving without a sound.

“Hey, beautiful girl.”

His arm lifted towards me and stopped as if I was expected to take his hand. I sat there blinking, trying to figure out what I was meant to be feeling. When he realized I wasn’t moving he lowered his arm down to his lap.

His appearance had changed drastically from what I remembered. Bags under his eyes. Paler skin, and something different that at first I couldn’t quite place. It wasn’t until I looked beyond his face and extended my peripheral vision to his aura that I realized what the difference was.

There were spots of red in his aura that were repelling the light in the room. I knew what this signified. Residual anger, unforgiving, anxiety.

I watched him watching me, waiting for a response.

“Hey.” It was awkward. There was an invisible wall that had been erected between us, not by us but by all that had happened in the last few days.

“How are you doing?”

“I’m not.” That was the truth. I knew I wasn’t doing well but there was nothing I could do to change that at the moment. I didn’t know how.

I saw the pain flicker across his eyes and the pull of his brows.

“Do you want to talk about what happened?”

I just shook my head. I definitely didn’t want to talk about it. Not ever. No one could ever know. It was something I couldn’t relive.

“I’m here for you, Dakota. One hundred percent. I know it may seem like you’re alone right now, but you’re not. I love you. Daniel loves you. My parents love you. We’ll do whatever we can for you.”

Those were words that had been promised before but in the end they had been just that. Words. Promises didn’t mean anything. No one could keep those promises. There were too many obstacles in life that hindered such oaths. I had learnt that the hard way.

Except for maybe one promise that had been kept. “You killed him.”

Kyle looked away from me for the first time and squeezed his eyes shut before grinding out, “I had to. It was me or him.”

“Why didn’t the police arrest him?”

“They went there with every intention of arresting him but he resisted. He killed the sheriff and shot another officer.”

For the first time in days, I felt something stir within. I could feel my mouth hanging open. “He…he killed the sheriff?”

“Yes, and if the other officer hadn’t been wearing a bullet-proof vest, he probably would have died also.”

I let Kyle’s words settle so I could attempt to comprehend the enormity of what had happened, remembering that while I had been tied up in another room, the shots I’d heard had been the sounds of death.

I couldn’t think or talk about it. I turned and looked out the window, letting Kyle know the conversation was over.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered before an awkward silence settled over us.

We’d always had loads to talk about. We didn’t normally have to try to fill long periods of stillness.

After a few minutes of trying to think of something to say, I asked, “How’s your leg?”

“My knee? It’s fine. Well, it will be once the breaks heal. The doctor said I’ll be allowed home tomorrow.”

I nodded, still not making eye contact. “That’s good. Daniel needs you.”

“Hey,” Kyle urged, moving himself and the chair around the bed to face me. “Look at me.”

He moved in as close as he could, overshadowing my view outside so he was all I could see. “Angel, it’s okay to be scared. I’ve been scared. We’ve all been scared. You don’t have to hide anything from me. You don’t have to be anything.” His head was moving so my eyes would connect with his.

When they finally did, they locked on. “I don’t…I can’t…” I didn’t know what to say or do.

“Shhh. It’s all right.” His hand moved to the bed, resting on my leg on top of the covers. I let him keep it there, having that safe barrier between us. “Don’t say anything. Just hear me out.”

I could do that. Regardless whether I could take in all he was going to say, I could remain silent.

“I promise you with everything I have that we’re going to get through this. You don’t have to fear John from this point on. He can’t hurt you. It’s over. The nightmare has ended for good.” His hand started rubbing up and down the covers, as if comforting my leg through the fabric. “It’s all about you now. Whatever you want or need, it’s yours. Daniel and I are going to take care of you and show you that you don’t need to be afraid anymore.”

He paused for some sign from me that I comprehended what he was saying. I could feel my head moving in a gesture of acknowledgement but still felt detached.

“Go to our special place and picture us there. Feel, see, and smell everything about it and let it give you some sort of peace. Do whatever you have to in order to come back to us, angel.”

Before I could say or do anything, Sky walked into the room, followed by a young woman in plain clothes but wearing a name badge.

“Hey Dakota. This is Ebony. She’s our clinical psychologist. She’d like to have a chat with you, if that’s okay.”

Sky looked at Kyle in a ‘you’ll need to leave manner,’ so he took the hint. As he started wheeling himself out, he turned to me and said, “Remember what I said. Our special place. I love you. I’ll see you soon.” He smiled at me, and without waiting for me to respond, he was gone with Sky.

Chapter

Thirty-Five

Kyle

I’d never seen her look so lost or destroyed. The spark had gone. Even that first meeting on Sapphire Island had revealed critical life behind those gorgeous eyes. It broke me to see nothing but vacancy staring back at me now. Had she totally disconnected herself from me mentally?

I wasn’t going to let that asshole John win, even after his death. He didn’t get to do that. I wouldn’t let him. I would fight for the love I knew Dakota had for Daniel and I and for life in general.

Back in my room and on my bed, Dad appeared. “How did your visit with Dakota go, son?”

I shook my head. “She’s not good. It didn’t feel like she was there at all. Physically it was her but her essence has been destroyed. It’s killing me. I don’t know what I can do for her.”

“It’s still early days. You need to give her time. It’s overwhelming to her.” Dad pulled over a chair and sat beside the bed with a shattered look on his face.

“What is it? You look like you know something that I don’t! Tell me!”

I knew that look on my father’s face. When he chewed the inside of his cheek and flicked his eyes nervously from me to nothing in particular. He blew out a breath.

“Son, I found out some more of what Dakota went through from the police. I spoke with them while you were visiting Dakota.” He was shaking his head now and then ran a hand briskly over his stubbly face.

Part of me didn’t want to hear it but the other half needed to know some of what had transpired.

I took a long swig of water before nodding at my father to continue, bracing myself for what was to come.

“She made a break for it through the sliding glass doors and ran, cut and bleeding with broken ribs, through the forest to the general store.”

Just the image of that made me fist the sheets with barely contained emotions. I could feel physical pain in my chest, thinking of how terrified she must have been…running for miles in a state that should have seen her in the hospital long before she was found and admitted.

I sucked in a breath and let it out a few times, growling out, “She was running for her life and I wasn’t there to do anything. I was sitting at home waiting for the police to do their job.”

What had been going through her mind? Fuck! She must have felt so helpless and alone. That alone was like driving a dagger through my heart.

I felt Dad’s hand on my arm. “She made it to safety, but somehow John found her and convinced Jervis, the store manager, to release Dakota back into his care. Told some concocted story about his wife being mentally unstable and she needed to get back to the cabin to take her medication. Jervis bought the story and sent them on their way but later called police on a hunch that something didn’t feel quite right.”

“Jesus, Dad! He let her go with that prick? Couldn’t he see the state she was in? I don’t understand!”

“I know. Apparently Jervis feels really bad now and says he should have trusted his gut instinct but I guess we can all be thankful he did eventually call police, otherwise we’d still be none the wiser.”

“No wonder she’s so screwed up at the moment. I’m so glad that piece of trash can’t hurt her anymore.” Suddenly killing John seemed justified. The guilt over taking a life was insignificant compared to the relief that the bastard had been stopped.

“We’ll all just have to tread carefully for a while. Make sure we watch what we say. The police are going to want to get her statement but hospital staff are allowing her some time before that happens.”

“A therapist is with her now, which may help. I hope so because she won’t be able to deal with it until she talks about it.”

“I’ll arrange to have the very best ongoing treatment for her when she leaves the hospital.”

“Thanks, Dad. Did you set my plan in motion?”

“Yes. I think it’s going to help her immensely.”

“I hope so. I just want to see her smile again. I want that twinkle in her eye that she had only days ago.”

She was all I could think about. I wanted to be able to do more than I was. To show her how much I loved her.

“Dad, can you arrange to have some flowers sent to her room? Not roses! Anything but roses. Oh and if you can grab me a pen and paper from somewhere, I’ll write down what I want the card to say.”

“Sure. I should have thought of that earlier. I’ll send a big bunch from Cheryl, Daniel, and myself too.”

I went to lean over to get my credit card out of my wallet but Dad stopped me. “I’ve got this, son. Don’t worry about it. It’s the least I can do.”

I lay back down on my bed, happy that even though the flowers were only a tiny gesture in the whole scheme of things, at least I was doing something to hopefully brighten her day. Hopefully when she discovered what I’d been organizing for her return home, it would help to lift her spirits and set the motion of healing in progress.