Save Me (Elk Creek) (27 page)

“Yes, he’s dead,” the policeman whispered back.

She let out a breath.
“Good.” Her face reappeared in the doorway. “I’ll walk you to her room, if you don’t have any questions for me.”

“No, we’re good
,” I said quickly, not wanting to wait another minute to see Taryn.

We followed
Dr. Lennings up to the third floor. Our shoes all squeaked on the glossy, polished linoleum. The air was cool but somehow stifling, and had an unpleasant chemical smell. I tried not to peer into doorways as we walked past them, down a long hallway and to the door to Taryn’s room, where she left us. I walked in first, reaching the side of her bed while Ethan moved to the other side. I couldn’t control the tears in my eyes, or the tightening in my chest. I couldn’t stop my hands from shaking as I put her fragile, still one in mine. I couldn’t stop the feelings of joy she was alive, and pain for her suffering. I was a complete mess of scrambled emotions, and I didn’t think Ethan was fairing much better.

Taryn’s
hair was a tangled mess, there was blood caked around her hairline, her left eye was so swollen I couldn’t see her eyelid. Her lips were cracked, and I could see several bruises forming on her arms. I was thankful I couldn’t see any more due to her hospital gown and blankets. 

I reached up to brush the few locks of hair that were in her face, and softly ran my fingers down her cheek. Ethan had grabbed her other hand, and we both sat with her
in silence until the doctor returned to check on her. We both stood outside until she and the nurse walked out.

This became
our routine for the next fourteen hours. We traded brief bathroom and water breaks, but never left Taryn alone. At least one of us was always at her side, grasping her hand. We hardly spoke. The only sound around us was the beeping of machinery, and the soft padding of the doctors and nurses walking by the room.

Jim, Mel, and Mr. Dalton arrived, wiping tears from their eyes
and kissing Taryn’s forehead. They embraced us. We spoke in hushed voices. It was surreal, watching Taryn’s chest rise and fall. Seeing her pulse rate on the screen next to her and the IV dripping steadily into her arm. Listening to the chorus of constant machine beeps around her. We had all tried so hard to protect her, to keep her from this very place. We all sat, continuing to wait and watch.

I was in my usual place next to her,
grasping her hand. Mr. Dalton was sitting on her other side, and Ethan was in a chair at the foot of the bed. Jim and Mel had gone to their hotel room to get a few hours’ sleep. I was starting to nod off when I felt her hand twitch. I sat up, and stared at her hand. It twitched again, and she let out a soft moan. I was on my feet, hovering over her face.

“Taryn, can you hear me?” I anxiously asked. A slight squeeze from her hand, and then a
flicker of her good eye. Tears sprang into my eyes.

“Tare, can you wake up
, baby girl?” Ethan asked. His voice revealed the same eagerness I was feeling. I wanted to see her beautiful green eyes more than I had ever wanted anything in my life. Mr. Dalton rose to his feet, holding his breath in anticipation.

The three of us crowded around the head of her bed as her good eye opened to a tiny slit, then little by little
, opened more. She squeezed my hand again, and there was no way I could hold back the tears.

“Hi
,” I choked out.

“Hi
.” Her voice was rough and barely a whisper, but it was the most beautiful sound I had ever heard. I heard a sob from Ethan, and saw a teary-eyed Mr. Dalton before she squeezed her eye shut and moaned. Ethan pushed for the nurse, but before she came in Taryn had fallen asleep again. With everything that had happened, that little “Hi” gave me hope that she would be okay, that we would be okay.

              It had been five weeks since Taryn’s three-day stay at the hospital. I was able to start my job at DFW a week later than I was originally scheduled, thanks to an understanding director.  My days had been filled with getting acquainted with my job, and my evenings with Taryn. She was still recovering, but was mostly back to her previous physical abilities. Her mental state had taken a huge step back.

             
She had nightmares regardless of whether I was there or not, she wouldn’t leave the house, even with Barlow. She was quiet and hadn’t laughed once since she came home. She was extremely upset when she learned about Marcus, and that it was he who killed his father. We were all relieved when the District Attorney dropped any charges against Marcus, due to witness statements verifying that if he hadn’t shot Max when he did, Taryn would be dead. All the evidence collected at the cabin, and all that Mitch had submitted, proved Max’s intent was to kill Taryn.

             
For weeks, I was deeply concerned about her state of mind. When I tried to talk to her, she would change the subject or just walk away. Her emerald eyes were void of their normal glimmer. They were lifeless and flat. Jim checked on her almost every day, and Ethan was at his wit’s end. He was spending a lot of time away from home, and Mr. Dalton constantly tried to get her to smile or laugh. 

             
Enough was enough, I needed my little imp back, I needed to see her happy, to see that spark of fire behind her eyes. I needed to wonder what prank she would pull, and I needed the reassurance that she loved me. I needed her, all of her, and it was time I saved her.

Chapter 24
- Taryn

Blood, sticky and wet.
Pain, blinding pain, I scream. Evil eyes stare at me, and I’m caged, locked away. I’m so cold. “Someone save ME!” I scream and rattle the bars to my cage.                “No one will save a good bitch like you!” I hear his horrible voice, then pain, always pain. 

“Please
!”

Carter, I smell him, I feel him, he will save me. I hear his scratchy voic
e.“Taryn, you’re lost. Come back.”

It
’s dark, I can’t see him, the dark suffocates me, I can’t breathe, I can’t escape!

             
“Shh, I got you. You’re okay now, it was just a dream.” I heard Carter as he rocked me in his lap. God, I was so sick of this night after night. I was ruined, and he just wouldn’t see it. I didn’t know how to make him see how much better his life would be without me. I was nothing but a hindrance to him—like a wart on a delicate finger, a barnacle on a smooth seashell.

             
I had been distancing myself from Carter for weeks, hoping he would get tired of me and go. He wouldn’t, he was loving to me, exhibiting only affection and continuing with his never-ending patience. I was going to have to make him see. He needed a life that didn’t revolve around my screwed-up mind. 

             
I pulled myself up, and swung my legs off his lap. I could see the confused look on his face, but I had to do this for the both of us. I couldn’t deal with seeing him look at me with those soulful brown eyes filled with sadness and longing anymore. I walked to the door and opened it.

             
“Carter, you need to leave,” I said calmly. Oh God, I didn’t think I could do this. The hurt in his eyes made my chest squeeze, and my knees almost gave out.

             
“Taryn, what is going on?” he asked softly.

             
“I can’t do this anymore,” I took a breath, “I can’t be with you. You have to leave.” I was surprised with how even my voice was. My insides were shaking so badly that I probably could have registered on a Richter scale. 

             
“I don’t understand, what do you mean you can’t be with me?” he said, but with more authority than I was used to from him.

             
“Just what I said, I can’t be with you,” I repeated. “What part of that don’t you understand?” I said sternly.

             
“Okay, then tell me why. Why can’t you be with me?” His voice was authoritative, and almost casual. I wasn’t understanding. He wasn’t taking me seriously.

“I don’t love you, you and I don’t work
.” It killed me to lie to him, he would be the only man I ever loved, and I would always cherish the time I had with him, but I had to save him from my crazy, pathetic life.

“Mmhmm, well
, I’m sorry to hear that,” he stated with that same calmness as he pulled on a pair of pants. I started to wonder if he was happy to have an out. I was sure he was, I mean, who wanted to spend their life with shut-in who was scarred and couldn’t sleep a single night without screaming? I should have never gotten involved with him to begin with. I should have saved him and myself this heartache.

He started walking toward me, and stopped bending his head down close to my face.  “Well, I guess I will have to love enough for the both of us
,” he stated before he grabbed me by my waist and tossed me over his shoulder. I started kicking and punching, trying to wiggle my way off of him. His grip just tightened. 

“What are you doing?!” I yelled, not caring if I woke the entire house. Barlow was trailing behind, not attacking my assailant in the least.
His ears were perked as he looked up at me.

“Put me down NOW!!!” I yelled again, and heard footsteps rushing down the stairs.

“What’s going on?” a sleepy Ethan asked.

“Just a misunderstanding
, Ethan, go back to bed. Oh, and can you take Barlow with you?” Carter said as if nothing were wrong.

“Ethan, help me
,” I said, tilting my head up so I could see him. His broad smile irritated me, and I screeched in frustration.

“Sorry Tare, I think Carter can take care of you
,” he said, chuckling and grabbing Barlow by his collar before heading up the stairs.

“You stupid
jerk! How is it my life has become so pathetic my own brother won’t help me from a deranged behemoth?” Carter laughed, then opened the sliding door. I felt the cold October air against my bare legs. It was pre-dawn and just light enough to see. “Carter, really what are you doing? Where are you going? Where are you taking me?!” I yelled as loudly as I could. I was really starting to worry over his sanity. Maybe we were a matched pair after all. I huffed with the thought. No, I wouldn’t sentence Carter to my insanity, and this just proved he had already been influenced too much.

I continued fighting against his hold, but opt
ed not to say anything, as it wasn’t doing any good. I tried to knee him, kick him, bite him, but nothing seemed to have any effect on him.  He just quietly kept walking, and once we headed down the sloped yard, I knew he was going to the lake. Crap, what was he going to do, meditate until I changed my mind? I snorted.

The air was substantially colder near the lake
. Goose bumps covered my body, and I shivered. I could see Carter’s feet hit the wet sand, and knew he was standing at the water’s edge. He took a few steps into the water, soaking the bottom of his jeans.

“Carter?
Wha—”

My question was cut off when he launched me in
to the air to crash into the water. The instant cold shocked me, leaving me disoriented before I managed to kick to the surface. As my face hit the cold air, I tried to gulp in a breath, but my lungs were frozen or shocked—I wasn’t sure—but only a tiny bit of air seemed to go in. I sputtered, and tried to take in more air. Finally, I was able to get a full breath.

“Wh-what d’you t-that for?” I stuttered through chattering teeth, noticing him standing waist high in the water with his arms crossed over his bare chest.

“You can explain to me why you don’t love me,” he stated firmly.

“I a-already t-told you.” My voice wasn’t nearly as strong as I needed it to be.

“No, you lied to me. What you gave me was bullshit, and I want the truth, or you can stay there and freeze.” He was so cavalier, and I was going to get hypothermia while he stood there with his smug face and his dominating stance.

“You d-don’t want to b-be with me!” I yelled
. The anger I was feeling was starting to warm my body.

“And what in God’s name convinced you of that?”
he asked.

“You did, you c-can’t be with s-someone who is as messed up as me. Y-you d-deserve m-more.” I couldn’t do it anymore, tears
were running in contrast of my cold cheeks. I couldn’t fight with him, it hurt too much. I loved him, and hated that I couldn’t have the life I envisioned with him. I needed him to be happy too much to keep him. 

“You are so full of shit, your eyes should be brown!”
he said angrily. “You think I deserve more than you? More than the one thing in my life that makes me happy? You think I would be better without you? What is this, some lame attempt at martyrdom? Are you really going to sit there and sacrifice both our happiness because you think you aren’t good enough for me?” 

I couldn’t answer, I didn’t have an answer other than
yes
, which was what I was thinking.  I was so numb, I didn’t think I could talk anymore anyway.

“Well, Taryn that just isn’t going to work for m
e. I think I have failed you, I have failed in making you understand what you mean to me. I am nothing without you, I need you as much as I need to breathe. What can I do to make you understand? What can I say to you, so you understand that you are perfect?!” He sounded so desperate, and I was dying inside knowing it was because of me. I never wanted to hurt him.

“Do you know what your problem is? Your problem is you think too much, you think you know what’s best, but worse is that you are afraid, and because you are afraid you are running from
our life together. You are being a coward! You, Taryn, lived through hell three times. The kind of hell most people never know once. Yet you found the courage and strength to fight then, why is it so hard for you to do it with us? Why can’t you be courageous now? I love you, and I want you. I won’t give you up, and I won’t give up on us. When are you going to be brave enough to do the same?”

A sob broke free, and another. I couldn’t feel most of my body, except my heart. In one instant I felt it splinter and break, and then the next he put it back together.  He was right, I was a coward, and it was so wrong of me to be willing to fight for my life, especially when all I could picture was my life with him. Yet, I was willing to throw it away
once I survived? I was stupid, and thank God he loved me anyway.

“C-carter can y-you c-come get m-me now?” I asked
, shivering and hugging myself tightly with my arms across my chest.

“Not until you tell me you love me, and you will never pull this bullshit again, not for the rest of our lives, not even after that
,” he demanded, and I felt a slight quirk of my lips.

“I l-love you
.” I said as loudly as I could, but with my teeth chattering and the fatigue it came out little more than a whisper. “Y-you and m-me, al-always,” I stammered.

He smiled, and it grew wider as he strode through the water to me. He grabbed me, and pulled me into him. I didn’t hesitate
to wrap my arms around him, and put my frozen, numb lips to his warm, soft ones. As the buoyancy of my body changed with Carter carrying me from the water, I wrapped my legs around his waist, not releasing his lips. He carried me to the house, through the sliders and into the bathroom. 

Without releasing me
, he turned on the shower, and carried me in. The hot water felt like needles stabbing through my skin, and I tried to squirm away from the spray. He chuckled through my lips, and I nipped his bottom lip before pulling away.

“You are awfully mean, you better watch it or you might just find a payback
,” I quipped with a smirk.

“I look forward to it
, baby,” he said as he sat me down, then began lifting my soaked t-shirt up and over my head. I was left in only my panties, which he quickly peeled off, too. He began washing my hair, gently rubbing the shampoo into my scalp with the pads of his fingers. He moved on to glide soap over my body, stopping at every scar to kiss them. I was a ball of mush by the time he was done, and my body had gone from sub-zero to volcanic.

After he rinsed me off,
gently running his hands over me under the stream of hot water, he picked me up into his arms. Not bothering with a towel, he carried me into the bedroom, laying my wet body on the bed. The look of hunger in his eyes and his potent erection had my body tingling. He kissed and licked my entire body before rising above me.

“Have I made myself clear, Taryn?”
he said huskily.

“Yes, I love you
,” I whispered, then moaned as he entered me. My eyes drifted shut when he leaned down and took my mouth. The closeness and love I felt for him was overwhelming and addictive. I was intoxicated by him and what he did to my body. But mostly I realized how much I needed him. He had saved me more times and in more ways than I could count. 

“Open your eyes
,” he said as he slowly thrust into me. “Don’t ever run from me again, I will only chase you. I love you, baby,” he panted.

I started to feel the quickening in my belly, and dug my fingers into his shoulders.  “Carter, I won’
t,” I breathed out before I tensed and felt the pleasure flow from my head to my toes, relishing in the closeness and bond I shared with this brilliant, selfless man.

“Taryn
!” he groaned as he found his release. After a moment, he rolled over, pulling me on top of him while staying connected in the most primitive way. 

He grasped my cheeks
. Running his thumb against my cheek bones he said, “I love you Taryn, you are perfect for me.”

“You are perfect for me
, too. You keep saving me from myself, and continue to love me through my idiocy and self-doubt. I do love you, I never stopped loving you. I’m sorry I lied.  You were right, I was being a coward,” I said shamefully.

“Don’t look like that,
” he said softly. “That’s why we belong together, together we equal perfection. You have saved me, too.”

The END