Sacrifice (20 page)

“What are you doing?” I hissed.

“I know you had a rough day.” He met my eyes, and I melted a little. The moonlight edged his dark hair in silver. I felt a longing to reach out and run my fingers through the silky black strands.

“Come inside before you fall,” I said. I helped Lucas climb inside, then closed the window and pulled the drapes shut against prying eyes.

He was standing so close that when I turned to face him I brushed against his chest. I heard his quick intake of breath, and lifted my eyes to his face.

“What are you doing?” I asked again, but this time my voice trembled.

In answer, Lucas lifted a hand to my cheek. He drew his fingers down along my jaw, then tilted my head up. I felt my lips part, and my eyes half-lidded of their own volition.

“Lucas,” I breathed.

“Let this be our night,” he whispered.

I felt a surge of longing, and swayed into him. Lucas bent forward and captured my lips in a sweet kiss. A powerful swell of energy shot up from my core—a tornado of hunger, hell-bent on fastening onto Lucas, draining him of his spirit and vitality.

I pushed the storm back, fighting to keep it at bay. Lucas felt me withdraw.

“It’s okay, Braedyn,” he breathed.

“No.” I looked up at him.

“I thought—I thought you wanted this, too.” He looked at me, a crushing disappointment gleaming in his eyes.

“Why tonight?” I met his gaze, but Lucas couldn’t hold it. “It’s because of Amber, isn’t it? Because of what she said? You want to comfort me.”

Surprise flickered through Lucas’s expression.

“When we have our night, I want it to be for us,” I whispered gently. “Not in response to a bad day. Not because we’re sad, or broken, or lost. I want it to be perfect. I want it to be a celebration. I want it to be an act of love.”

Lucas studied me for a long moment. Then he smiled. He leaned forward and gave me a soft kiss on the forehead. “You can be scary wise sometimes, you know?”

I let out a long breath, half-relief, half-regret.

“Does this mean I have to go home?” He brushed a loose strand of hair back from my cheek and tucked it behind my ear.

“No.” I took his hand and led him to my bed. We climbed onto the comforter and lay down together. I nestled against Lucas’s side. He wrapped an arm around me. In time, Lucas’s breathing changed to the deep, even sounds of sleep. I curled closer to him and felt his arm tighten around me in response.

It was everything I needed.

Chapter 10

When dreams are all you have, you find a way to make the most of them. The sensations are muted. Objects are never quite as substantial as they are in the physical world. It just doesn’t feel 100%
right
. But in that meadow, feeling the warmth of an imagined breeze blowing over my skin, staring into Lucas’s eyes, I willed myself to believe it anyway. Lucas drew me to him for another kiss. Our lips met, and I felt a thrill moving through my center—

“Braedyn.”

I heard her voice, but the dream was so sweet I didn’t want to leave. I turned back to Lucas, letting my fingers trail through his hair. His eyes creased with concern.

“Did you hear something?” he asked.

“
Braedyn, wake up.
”

Now she was shaking me.

I opened my eyes. Karayan stood over my bed, biting her lip. I moved, and felt Lucas’s solid form next to me. I sat bolt upright, alarm slamming the last foggy tendrils of sleep from my mind.

“Lucas.” I shook him awake. He blinked in the light of the new day then—like me—jerked into a sitting position.

“I fell asleep.” He looked around, groggy.

“Oh, you think?” Karayan eyed him with dark amusement.

“Did Dad…?” I met Karayan’s eyes, feeling a knot of anxiety working itself tighter into my stomach.

“Don’t you think you’d know if your father found you asleep in bed with your boyfriend?” Karayan crossed her arms and gave Lucas a flat look. “Speaking of which, you might want to head on home before someone—and by someone I mean Gretchen, your lethal, demon-hunting sister-in-law—finds out that you’re missing.”

“Right.” Lucas rolled off the bed and stood, running hands through his bed-head in an effort to disguise the fact he’d just woken up. “Is Murphy up?”

“He’s stirring,” Karayan glanced back into the hall, growing quiet for a moment, “but I think you’ll be safe if you go now.”

“Thanks.” Lucas shot one quick smile at me, then slipped quietly into the hall.

I waited until I heard the front door close softly behind him before letting out a long breath of relief. I collapsed back on the bed. How could we have been so stupid? What if we’d been seen? That was one way to ensure we’d never have another moment alone together as long as any member of the Guard was left standing.

“I owe you one, Karayan.”

“Whatever. If we don’t watch each other’s backs, who will, right?”

I propped myself back up on my elbows. Karayan walked to my bedroom door and closed it softly. She turned back to face me, wringing her hands.

I swung my feet over the edge of the bed and sat up again, curious. Karayan joined me, sitting at the foot of my bed.

“You called it.” She bit her lip. “I am—falling in love with him.” She brushed a strand of hair back from her face, and I saw her smile wistfully. “He’s a good man, Braedyn.”

“I know he is,” I said, more sharply than I meant to.

She glanced at me, startled. “Are you angry?”

“Yeah, actually, I am.”

Karayan looked genuinely surprised. “Why?”

“What do you think Hale would do if he knew you were visiting his dreams disguised as his dead wife?”

Karayan’s cheeks flushed pink. “How did—you’ve been spying on me?”

“You’re using his feelings for Sarah to manipulate him.”

“I was trying to comfort him!” Karayan glared at me, her eyes bright with anger. “I can’t even believe we’re having his conversation. You spend almost every night in Lucas’s dreams.”

“With his
permission.
”

“Hale
can’t
give me permission, but he—he’s as good as admitted his feelings for me, too. I thought a dream was the safest—” Karayan lurched to her feet, her face ashen. “You know, forget it. I’m not asking a minor for dating advice.” She turned and stumbled toward the door, looking for all the world like a lost child.

I jumped after her, catching her arm. “Wait. Karayan. Look. I—I understand.”

Karayan stopped at the door. “Do you? The Guard actually
supports
this thing you have with Lucas.”

I couldn’t stop a half-smile from twisting my lips. “I wouldn’t go that far—”

“No? You’ve kissed Lucas. What do you think would happen if I ever kissed Hale in the waking world?” She glanced at me then, eyes full of hurt. I didn’t have to say anything. We both knew the answer. “They make allowances for you that they’ll never make for me. I get it. Fine. I’m just asking you to let us have these dreams.”

“Us?” I shook my head, miserable. “Hale’s not even aware of what you’re doing.”

“I’m not hurting him. I would never hurt him. You have to believe that.”

“I know you’d never do anything to hurt him
intentionally.
”

Karayan shrugged my hand off her arm. “And you? You think you’re all that different than me?”

“Well, I still have the hope of becoming human one day,” I snapped. I wish I had the words back as soon as I said them.

Karayan jerked as if I’d slapped her. All the fight seemed to drain out of her eyes. “Oh. Right.”

“That—came out wrong.”

“No. I think you said exactly what you meant to say.” Karayan bit her lip, lost in unpleasant thoughts for a long moment. Then she centered those beautiful eyes on me. “So what happens now? Are you going to tell him?”

“Are you going to stop visiting his dreams?”

“No.” Karayan met my gaze. She didn’t flinch. “He looks at me and sees a woman—a friend. I’ve never had this with anyone before, Braedyn. I won’t give it up.”

I shook my head, miserable—but whether I was willing to admit it or not, I couldn’t help but empathize with her. Karayan read my indecision and sighed.

“When you decide what you want to do, let me know. In the meantime, you should probably change your clothes. You’re going to be late for school.” And with that, Karayan turned and walked out of the room.

When I made my way down to the kitchen for breakfast, Karayan was nowhere to be found. Dad was pouring himself a cup of coffee.

“We’re out of eggs, but there are some English muffins in the fridge if you’re hungry.” He passed me on the way to the dining room and planted a kiss on the top of my head.

“You’re in a hurry,” I called over my shoulder. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, just some administrative stuff Hale wants me to take care of for the Guard.” Dad shrugged. “You wouldn’t believe the resources it takes to keep 100 Guardsmen housed, fed, and hidden in plain sight.”

I pulled the English muffins out of the fridge, mulling this over. I knew the majority of the world’s remaining Guard forces were here in Puerto Escondido, but I never saw more than a dozen of them at any one time—either on duty at the mission or hanging out here in their downtime.

“So… how much money does the Guard have?” I asked.

Dad shot me a smile from the dining room where he was finishing his cup of coffee. “Enough.”

“That’s not much of an answer.”

Dad considered me thoughtfully. “Most of the Guard’s income is generated by real estate; lands the Guard has owned under various names for centuries. We’ve been living off one trust for decades, but that’s one trust out of several hundred that I’m aware of.”

“And that’s how we’re paying for Amber’s tuition?” I asked.

“Amber’s tuition, your tuition, this house, our food—” Dad took another swig of coffee. “Like I said. It’s enough.” Dad shrugged into his winter coat. “Okay. I’ll see you after school. Have a good day, honey.” Dad walked to the front door, but when he opened it, Cassie was standing on our front porch. “Cassie.”

“Mr. Murphy.” Cassie looked like she was ready to burst. She strained to look past him until she spotted me.

“What happened, Cass?” I joined them in the doorway, hugging my arms against the cold of the outside world.

“Idris called me this morning. They’re meeting again tonight.” Cassie glanced at Dad. “I figured the Guard would want to know as soon as possible.”

“Yes.” Dad glanced at the house next door. “You say the meeting is tonight?”

Cassie nodded. “I’m supposed to meet Carrie at the coffee shop again at six. She knows where we’re going.”

“Okay. Why don’t you two head to school.”

“School?” I glanced at Dad, stricken. “Shouldn’t we be—I don’t know, fitting Cassie with body armor or something?”

“We should be acting normal,” Dad said. “We don’t know who’s watching Cassie, or what might tip them off.” He put a hand on Cassie’s shoulder. “The best thing is to continue with your normal routine. But I’ll alert the Guard. We’ll be on hand to back you up tonight.”

Cassie nodded. She glanced over her shoulder at Royal, waiting in his car on the curb. Then she looked at me with a small smile. “So… I guess that means I’ll see you at school?”

“Yeah.”

Cassie bounded away from us, slipping back into Royal’s waiting car. They drove off together.

Dad, watching Cassie go, frowned. “Keep an eye on her,” he said.

I nodded. No matter how seriously the rest of us took this stuff, Cassie still seemed to be treating it as the best adventure she’d ever had.

We dropped Cassie off at the edge of the plaza in Old Town at 5:30 that night. We’d taken my car, but as soon as we let Cassie out, I scooted over into the passenger side and Royal took the wheel. The plan was for him to drive while I kept a mental eye on Cassie. Lucas had his cell phone at the ready; we’d be in contact with the Guard as soon as Cassie and Carrie left the coffee shop for the meeting.

We parked across the plaza, with a clear view of the coffee shop door. I kept my eyes focused on the exit, waiting for Cassie to reemerge. Though the early days of April had been unseasonably warm, tonight was actually pretty chilly.