Rose (Suitors of Seattle) (12 page)

“I had lunch with Aunt Harriett and tea with mother.  I spent a bit of time exploring the house and getting to know the staff.  Simple things, but important to me.”
She shrugged, letting him know that she didn’t expect him to find her day exciting.

“Yes, of course.”  He took another bite of the soup and asked, “What are your plans for tomorrow?”

“I spend all day Tuesdays and Thursdays at the battered women’s shelter.  I’ll probably continue on that schedule if that’s all right with you.”  She’d changed her schedule right after they’d become engaged so she could have three entire days each week for wedding planning.  It worked better for her than working there in the mornings as she’d done in the past.

“It sounds good to me.  I’m glad you told me, though, because there are days when I come home for lunch, and would wonder why you weren’t here.  I’ll try to limit the days I come home to days you’ll be here.” 

She nodded.  They were being so formal with one another compared to the ease of their previous relationship, but she knew that it would get easier with time.  Or she hoped it would.  “That would be nice.”  She did like the idea of spending time with him during the day. 

Once dinner was over, he said he needed to do a bit of paperwork, so she went upstairs and took a bath before beginning her bedtime ritual of brushing her teeth and hair.  She’d always given her hair a thousand strokes before bed, but brushing her teeth every night was something she’d started since Shawn had come into her life.  She liked it, though, because it left her breath smelling better and
she liked how clean her teeth felt when she ran her tongue over them.  She thought everyone should brush their teeth every day.

She got into her nightgown and climbed into bed, staring at the ceiling in the darkness.  She was going to stay in the room she’d slept in for the past two nights at least for tonight.  She wasn’t sure she was ready for intimacy again when she knew he didn’t love her.

Shawn finished his paperwork and climbed the stairs, hoping to find his wife in his bed waiting for him.  He opened the door to his room and saw the empty bed, and sighed in defeat.  She’d asked for time, and he’d certainly give it to her, of course.  He just wished she’d be willing to make love with him during the time she needed. 

For a moment he wondered what she’d do if he joined her in the bed she was sleeping in, and walked down the hall with his hand on the doorknob, trying to decide if he’d do it.  He stood for a moment, before finally walking away, wishing he knew what kind of reception he’d receive.

He brushed his teeth and climbed into bed, wishing he was holding his new wife, and everything was right between them.  He should have taken more time courting her.  A gentleman would have waited until he loved a woman before proposing to her instead of rushing her so his needs could be met. 

He sighed.  Hopefully he’d be able to make everything right.  He would certainly try.  She was a sweet girl, and she deserved happiness.

*****

There was a new woman, Annie, at the battered woman’s home the following day, and Rose sat with her talking to her.  Her arm was in a sling where it had been broken, and she had bruises across one cheek.  “Can I get you anything?”

Annie shook her head.  “No, but thank you.”  She stared dejectedly at the wall.  She was propped up in her bed with pillows behind her back.

Rose sat down beside her on the edge of her bed.  Annie had no children, so she was better off than most of the women there who would have to find a way to support not only themselves, but their children.  “Do you want to talk about what happened?”
  In the two years Rose had worked with the women, she’d found her greatest asset was being willing to listen to their stories.  Most of them just needed to talk.

Annie’s eyes were full of anger when they met Rose’s.  “How old are you?”

Rose didn’t know why that mattered, but she answered.  “I’m eighteen.”

“Eighteen
, and you think you can help me?  When I was eighteen I’d already been married for three years, and my husband had been beating me every day for all of them.  I’m twenty-one now.  Twenty one!  I have nothing to show for my life except a broken arm and a lot of bruises.”

Rose squeezed Annie’s uninjured hand.  “I know you must be angry.”

“Angry?  I’m furious! That man stole six years of my life!  He didn’t love me, but he told me he loved me every day.  He only wanted someone to hurt.  Well, he can hurt someone else now.”  She rolled to her good side on the bed, turning her back to Rose and effectively dismissing her.

Rose had no idea what to do to help, but she wished she did.
  She stood and left the room, closing the door softly behind her.  She really wished she had more experience to help women like Annie.

She walked down to the kitchen to talk to Mildred, Higgins’ wife, who had a similar story to her aunt’s.  Mildred looked up from the carrots she was chopping when Rose entered the room.  “How is she doing?”

Rose shook her head.  “Very angry.  She doesn’t want to talk.”  She wondered if Mildred would do better with her.

Mildred nodded.  “It’s a hard situation to be in.  I’m glad she didn’t have children.”

Rose nodded.  “How did she get here?”  Sometimes the women were brought by their doctors, and sometimes the police brought them.  Every once in a while, a helpful friend would bring them in.

“The doctor sent her over this morning after setting her arm.  He told her she needed to get away from her husband before he hurt her more seriously.  He’s sent a lot of women our way.”  She shook her head sadly.  “I wish women had the courage to get out on their own and didn’t have to wait to be rescued from a situation like that.”

Rose nodded.  “Why don’t they?”  She had been more than willing to get away from her husband, and she didn’t have it half as bad as the women who came there for sanctuary.

Mildred handed Rose an extra knife and a bowl of potatoes.  Rose immediately began peeling the potatoes.  “It’s hard to explain.  You feel like you’ve done something wrong, when you really haven’t.  In my case, my mother had warned me against marrying my husband.  She said he was mean as a rattlesnake.  She could see it in his eyes.”

“And she was right?” Rose knew there was abuse in Mildred’s past, but she’d never actually heard the other woman’s story.

Mildred nodded.  “Oh yes.  She was right.  I tried to go back to her soon after we were married thinking that she would take me back, but she told me I’d married him and it was my job to stay with him.”  She paused and looked up from the carrots.  “Normally I’d have agreed with her, but women aren’t meant to be beaten by their men.  If you have an argument, you shouldn’t leave, but if your man ever hits you?  You get out fast.”

“So you went back to him?”  Rose was more interested in the other women’s stories now that she was married.  Somehow it was all more real now.

“I had no place else to
go.  No one to take me in.  There were no houses like this one.  And I was carrying Alex.  I had no choice.”

“He hit you while you were carrying?”  After her aunt’s story, Rose knew she shouldn’t be surprised, but she was.  Why would a man hit a woman who was carrying his child?  It made no sense to her.

“He hit me right up until the day I had the baby.  The midwife saw the bruises on me, and I could see in her eyes that she knew what they were, but she didn’t say a word.  She just delivered the baby and got out.”  She shrugged.  “It’s just not something that’s talked about much, so women don’t know what to do.”

Rose sighed heavily.  “I’m really glad you have a good husband now.”
  And there was no doubt in Rose’s mind that Higgins was a good husband to Mildred.

Mildred grinned.  “I have a wonderful husband now who loves me and my son.  I wouldn’t trade him for anything.”

Rose turned and looked at her.  “How long did you two court before you married?”

Mildred laughed.  “He married me the day after my husband died.  He saw my son shoot him and wanted to help, so he married me.”

“But he loved you when you got married, right?”  Higgins wouldn’t marry a woman he didn’t love.  She knew Higgins.

“No, child.  He barely knew me, but he loves me now, and I love him with everything inside me.  Our marriage didn’t start the normal way, but we both worked hard to be the best spouse we could be, and we gradually fell in love.”  She shrugged. “When I married him I wasn’t even looking for love.  I was just looking for someone to take care of us who wouldn’t hit me.”

Higgins came into the room then, dropping a kiss on Mildred’s cheek.  “Lunch almost ready?”

Mildred nodded.  “In a few minutes.  We’ve almost got the vegetables chopped for the stew I’m making for dinner as well.”

Higgins smiled.  “I’m ready for some of your good cooking, Mildred.”  He looked at Rose. “My wife is the best cook this side of the Mississippi.”

Rose nodded, enjoying the obvious love between the two.  “Yes, she is.”  She felt hope sprin
g up inside her.  Higgins and Mildred were obviously very happy together, and they’d felt no love for one another before they’d married.  Maybe there was hope for her and Shawn after all!

Her mind was on her marriage as she served lunch to the residents of the house.  There were only three just then, and Annie didn’t come down from her room. Two of the women had small children, and Rose spent the afternoon watching over them while they napped and their mothers looked for work.

She felt badly for the women, knowing they would have a hard time finding jobs that would pay enough for the women to support their children.  Thankfully, there was no limit to how long they could stay in the house.  Her mother and Aunt Harriett had given jobs to many of the residents there, and she wondered if Shawn would be willing to do the same.  She liked the idea of helping in another way than the ones she already did.

It was later than usual when she made her way home that afternoon, because one of the women had been gone longer than expected, having found a household needing a cook, and she interviewed on the spot.  As she walked through the light rain, she thought about her marriage.  Having been bolstered by seeing Higgins
’s obvious love for Mildred after their rocky beginnings, she decided she needed to give Shawn another chance.  He’d asked if they could start over, and she believed they could. 

When she got home, she immediately moved her things from the room she was using into his.  She stood for a moment and admired how her clothes looked hanging beside his.  Maybe he didn’t love her, but she still loved him, and she wasn’t going to give up her chance at happiness just because she was stubborn.  Being a good wife was a role that was new to her, but one she was certain she could play to perfection. 

She hurried down the stairs and waited in the small parlor for him to arrive, knowing she was going to try to do some of the things her mother had suggested to help him understand that she was a good wife.  She wanted him to love her immediately, but she knew that love didn’t grow overnight.  Just because she had fallen for him at first sight didn’t mean he felt the same for her.  He was a special man, and he was worth fighting for. 

She said a silent thanks to the three women who had helped her see what she needed to do to make her marriage work: Aunt Harriett, her mama, and Mildred Higgins.  Thanks to them, she was going to have the perfect marriage she’d always wanted.  She just knew she would!

*****

Rose rushed out of her parlor when she heard the door open a few minutes later.  She went to the front door and took Shawn’s hat from him
, before greeting him with a kiss.  It was the first real kiss she’d ever initiated with him, and she felt funny kissing him on the lips when any of the servants could walk past, but she wanted him to see she loved him.

When she pulled back to hang his hat up, she saw the confusion
on his face.  She almost giggled.  She wound her arm through his and led him to the small parlor, knowing that dinner wouldn’t be ready for another fifteen minutes.  He sat on the sofa, and she curled up beside him, her hand on his thigh though his slacks.  “I missed you today,” she said in her sweetest voice.

He looked down at the top of her head which was resting against his shoulder and sighed, before leaning down to kiss her forehead.  “I missed you, too.  It was a long day.”

“For me as well.  There’s a new woman at the shelter, and she’s mad at the world.  I tried to talk to her and get her to tell me her story, but she just got angry at me.”  She sighed.  “I’ll try again on Thursday.”

“Why do you have them tell you their stories?”  His arm slipped around her shoulder and he pulled her closer to him, thankful she was letting him touch her again, even if it was innocently.

She shrugged. “It was Aunt Harriett’s idea, but it really seems to help most of them.  They always seem like they’re happier once the story is out and they’ve spoken so honestly about it.  I’m not sure why, but I’m happy to help them if I can.”  She tilted her head up so she could see him, smiling into his eyes.  “I love you.”

He stilled as she said the words again, surprised she would.  “I really do care about you, Rose.”

She smiled and nodded, much happier with that response than she had been his previous one.  She moved her hand behind his head and pulled it down to hers for a kiss.  This time it was her tongue that explored his lips, and when his mouth opened, she moved it into his mouth to tangle with his, something she hadn’t had the courage to do before.