Right Where I Belong (19 page)
“Just a minute.” Mom brought a plastic container out of the kitchen. “Here are some leftovers for her. Please tell her, again, how sorry we were she couldn’t come. Hopefully next time.”
“Thank you.” Natalia took the container from Mom and smiled.
Natalia was silent most of the ride home. Brian didn’t want to force conversation if she didn’t want it.
“You really do have a wonderful family.”
“I know.” He pulled into her driveway. “Maureen will get over this. She’s a strong lady.”
Natalia gripped Mom’s container against her chest. “I’m sure you are right.”
“You can talk to me, Natalia.” Brian searched her eyes, sensing the hurt in them. “I just want to be a friend. You don’t have to go through this alone.”
Her eyes filled with tears. She blinked them away and opened the car door. “Thanks. You are a good friend, Brian. I just . . .” Natalia got out of the car, then leaned her head back in. “I need to go.”
She walked into her town house. Why was she so afraid to talk about what was really going on? Why so closed off?
Brian pulled out of Natalia’s driveway and pointed his truck home.
God, help me help Natalia. And, please, God, help me not completely lose my heart in the process.
S
o here are some options for the fall semester.” Lexi laid four Bible-study books out on the table in Mrs. Stevenson’s room. This was the first meeting of the girls’ Bible study, and Natalia was amazed to see fifteen girls gathered around the two long tables. “A study of Philippians, one of the fruit of the Spirit, one about ‘Girl Issues,’ and this one is about dating.”
“Dating, definitely.” One of the sophomore girls picked up the book and read the blurb on the back. “Wait, maybe not. This is all about waiting to date.”
“You’re fifteen, Tori.” Lexi leveled her gaze at the young woman.
“I’m allowed to date when I’m sixteen,” the younger girl answered. “Which is two months away. I need to get ready.”
Lexi rolled her eyes. “All right. Any other thoughts?”
“I like this one.” Natalia opened up the study of the fruit of the Spirit. She had memorized the passage in Galatians last year. She desperately needed more patience and peace right now. Not to mention joy.
“I liked that one too,” Addy said.
The girls spent the next few minutes discussing the four books before finally settling on the fruit of the Spirit study.
“All right, then,” Lexi said. “I’ll order the books today. They’re eight dollars. It usually takes a week or so to get them in, so how about next Monday we just talk about the passage? Read it over this week and take some notes.”
The girls agreed, and Lexi asked if anyone had prayer requests. The girls shared several needs, from sick grandparents to science tests. Natalia wanted to tell the group about her need for money to go on the mission trip, but she was concerned. She had never needed money before, and she was embarrassed to admit the fact that she needed it now.
“Natalia?” Addy looked at her. “Anything we can pray about for you? Remember, nothing we say in here leaves this room.”
Natalia took a deep breath. “I’d really like to go on the mission trip to Costa Rica. But I’m not sure I can get the money for it.”
“I know someone who can get it for you.” Lexi pointed up, and Natalia thought again that her new friend and Brian would make a great couple. “Let’s ask him.”
Lexi led in prayer, and Natalia was impressed at how natural she sounded, conversing with God the way she talked with her friends. When Lexi finished, she walked over and gave Natalia a hug. Natalia couldn’t breathe from the force of it, but it felt good.
“You’re going on that trip.”
“I hope so,” Natalia said. “I’d really like to.”
With a few minutes left before the first bell, Natalia walked outside and checked her e-mail on her phone. She had written a long note to Carmen the night before, telling her what she learned from Pastor Brian yesterday afternoon. She hoped her friend had responded.
Natalia’s heart caught in her throat when she saw a note from Carmen in her in-box. When Natalia opened it, she read: “Glad you are convinced you’re right. Just don’t let those Americans corrupt you too much. —Carmen.”
Natalia punched her phone off. She spent two hours crafting her letter, trying to be loving yet firm, giving Carmen solid reasons why the Bible was true, why Jesus was real, why there is one absolute truth. She was sure Carmen would at least ask questions, open up a dialogue about those thoughts. Instead, her friend just gave her a verbal pat on the head and that was it.
“You okay, Natalia?” Spencer put a hand on her shoulder.
Shoving her phone deep into her backpack, she winced. “I’m trying to share my faith with a friend back home.”
“Not going well?”
“She just doesn’t care.”
Spencer nodded. “My mom is kind of like that. After she and Dad got divorced, she just gave up on God. I try to talk to her, but she doesn’t want to listen.”
“I’m sorry,” Natalia said.
“Yeah, and then I get caught in the middle of Dad’s and her arguments. She’s always mad at me because I want to spend more time with him. But she’s so focused on trying to get another husband that she doesn’t have time for me.”
“Are things with your dad better?”
“No.” Spencer shrugged. “But he doesn’t get all dramatic on me the way Mom does.”
Natalia could definitely relate. “It’s hard for a woman to watch the man she loves move on.”
Spencer looked at Natalia, his dark eyes sad. “You’re easy to talk to.”
Natalia wasn’t sure how to respond. Thankfully, the bell rang, giving her a way out.
“Natalia.” Spencer held her arm. “Want to hang out after school? There’s a great smoothie place around the corner.”
“Thanks, Spencer, but I can’t. Homework.”
Natalia hurried to homeroom, avoiding his gaze. Spencer was interested. That much was obvious. She also knew that beneath the confident exterior he was insecure and lonely.
Why can’t he see Lexi? She would be a perfect match for him. She’s fun and godly. She could listen to him and help him, make him laugh.
Natalia sat in her desk and laughed at herself. Just a few minutes earlier she was thinking of how perfect Lexi would be with Brian.
Why was it that someone so committed to remaining single was also such a romantic at heart? Natalia didn’t want to dwell on that thought. Because the answer revealed more than she was willing to admit.
Y
ou have a package.” Maureen dropped the brown box on the couch and retreated to her bedroom.
Since her meeting with Mrs. Jordan on Monday afternoon, Maureen had been brooding. She refused to talk about what happened. Natalia heard Karen telling her friends Maureen would be fired if she even looked at her the wrong way. But Natalia didn’t know whether that was true, or if it was just Karen trying to show off. But Maureen had been like a turtle—coming out only when necessary and hiding the rest of the time. Natalia couldn’t wait for ESL class that evening just to escape the silence of her house.
“Mamá remembered my birthday.” Natalia smiled to herself as she tore open the package. “And a week early.” Mamá was usually late with her gifts, and even then it was almost always a card with some money tucked inside. But this time she had sent a package. She had taken the time to buy something for Natalia and get it in the mail before her birthday arrived.
Natalia opened the box to reveal a stack of manila envelopes. She opened the one on top and saw the logo for an Ivy League school.
“College applications?” Her heart sank. As she opened the remaining envelopes, she saw more applications. Harvard, Yale, Duke, Pepperdine. At the bottom of the stack was a note on legal paper from her mother.
“Time to get started,” it read. “You need to fill these out and send them out by the end of the month. Your father will put the money for your application fees in your bank account. We’re hoping you have decided on your major. Knowing that will help narrow down your choices. —Mamá.”
Natalia threw the box down. “Thanks, Mamá. So nice to see that you and Papa are united on something.”
Unwilling to stay in the town house any longer, Natalia walked to the garage and grabbed her bicycle. She didn’t know where she was headed; she just had to get out. The humidity had not let up even though it was September, and sweat trickled down her back. She turned out of her neighborhood and out onto the main street. She was halfway to the church before she realized where she was headed.
Oh well, I have to be there tonight anyway. I’ll just tell Pastor to let Brian know I won’t need a ride.
Twenty minutes later Natalia turned into the parking lot at the church. She was soaked with sweat, but she felt better. She walked over to the church offices, hoping to find Pastor Brian before he left for the day.
“Natalia.” Mrs. Younger was in the church office, folding bulletins for Sunday. “How are you?”
“I am good.”
“You look exhausted. Would you like a drink?” Mrs. Younger walked into the lounge area where she pulled a water bottle from the refrigerator.
“Yes, thank you. I biked here.”
“Oh, Natalia, you should have called. We’d have given you a ride.”
“No, I needed to exercise to clear my head.”
Mrs. Younger’s eyes softened. “Is everything okay?”
Natalia sighed. She couldn’t lie to this kind woman. But she didn’t want to burden Mrs. Younger with her problems.
Brian’s mother laid down the bulletin she was working on and pulled out a chair. “Sit down and talk to me.”
Natalia did as she was told. “My mother sent me a package today. It was filled with college applications.”
“And that upset you?”
“It wasn’t the package. Not really. It was just that . . .” Natalia felt foolish.
“Go on.” Mrs. Younger’s soft eyes broke right through Natalia’s barriers.
“My birthday is next week.” Natalia spoke softly, her eyes on her hands.
“You thought it was a gift.”
The compassion in Mrs. Younger’s voice was too much. Natalia couldn’t stop the tears. “It is silly, I know. But I was so excited, and when I saw what was really in it . . .” She wiped a tear from her face. “My parents seem more concerned about me choosing what I want to major in than in who I am and how I’m doing.”
“I’m sure that’s not true.”
Natalia knew Mrs. Younger couldn’t understand that it
was true, all too true. “They want me to go to a good college, get a good degree, and make a good salary.”
“My parents were a lot like that.”
Natalia looked up. “Really?”
“Daddy owned a chain of grocery stores in southern Georgia. He didn’t have a college degree, but he worked hard and long and ended up very successful. He expected that and more from my sister and me. He taught us from the time we were little that money equals success and education gets us money.”
“Sounds like my father.”
“Daddy wanted me to be a doctor and my sister to be a lawyer. He had it all planned out, from where we’d get our undergraduate degrees to where we’d go after that.”
“What happened?”
Mrs. Younger laughed. “Brian Younger happened. I met him my first year of college. He swept me off my feet.”
“Did you know he wanted to be a pastor?”
“He didn’t know he wanted to be a pastor. Neither of us really had a relationship with God. My parents were good people, but not really religious. Brian’s parents were, and are, some of the godliest people I know. But when I met him, Brian had strayed away from the faith.”
“What happened?” Natalia couldn’t believe what she was hearing. She assumed the Youngers had been Christians since they were little, that their courtship was like something from the dating book none of the girls had wanted to read.
“Brian’s parents.” Mrs. Younger closed her eyes. “Brian brought me home and I fell in love with them. They were
so warm, and they spoke so openly about their relationship with God. Like he was a friend. I asked Brian why he never talked to me about God. He didn’t have a good reason. So I made him take me to church and teach me the Bible.”
“Wow.”
“By the end of our freshman year, I had become a Christian and Brian started leading Bible studies on campus. By the end of our sophomore year, he had switched to a Bible college.”
“What about you?”
“I was still majoring in premed, but my heart wasn’t in it.”
“What did your parents think?”
“They hated Brian, especially when he transferred to the Bible college. Daddy wanted me to break up with him right then.”
“And you didn’t?”
“I struggled with it,” Mrs. Younger said. “The Bible says to obey your parents, and they were telling me to end my relationship with Brian.”
“So what did you do?”
“I prayed about it. I didn’t want to make my parents angry, and I certainly didn’t want to lose the opportunity to see them come to Christ. But I felt like God was telling me I needed to trust him. He had brought Brian and me together. My parents’ reasons for wanting me to break up with Brian weren’t grounded in the Bible. Quite the opposite, in fact.”