Read My Lips (29 page)

Now, this wasn’t a perfect study. We didn’t, for example, ask about depilatory creams, which some women may use on their genitals. But it was the largest study ever conducted on women’s pubic-hair removal patterns and covered a lot of different age groups, so we’re quite proud of it, even if it wasn’t perfect.

HAIR, BARE, AND EVERYWHERE: WHAT WE LEARNED

What we found is that going bare isn’t nearly as common as many media reports suggest. Even among the youngest age group in our study (women ages eighteen to twenty-four), only 20.6 percent of women were typically bare. Another third (38.0 percent) removed all of their pubic hair some of the time, which means that some of the time they had pubic hair. We can’t help but wonder if these women remove their pubic hair only if they expect to have sex or when they have a GYN exam, as we know from other research we’ve conducted that women commonly groom their pubic hair before they see their doctor. Nearly one-third of college-aged women (29.1 percent) reported removing some, but never all, of their pubic hair over the previous month. The rest (12.4 percent) didn’t remove any of it that we know of.
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Women in older age groups were even less likely to remove all of their pubic hair. Among women ages twenty-five to twenty-nine:

• 12.4 percent were typically hair-free (went bare much of the time)
  
• 32.2 percent were sometimes hair-free
  
• 39.4 percent removed some of their hair, such as through waxing or shaving, but never all of it
  
• 16 percent didn’t shave, wax, or use electrolysis or laser methods
  

For women in their thirties and forties, about half removed some pubic hair but didn’t go bare. Only about 9 percent of women in their thirties reported being bare much of the time over the past month, as did about 7 percent of women in their forties. We also found that bisexual women were more likely to go bare compared to straight or lesbian women. Women who were partnered were more likely to go bare at least some of the time, and those who were not sexually active generally didn’t remove their pubic hair compared to other women.

What was particularly curious is that women who went bare some or much of the time had higher scores on measures of genital self-image and sexual function. This means that these women generally felt more positively about their genitals. They also generally experienced higher desire, higher arousal, and greater sexual satisfaction than women who didn’t go bare. We’re not really sure what this means. We find it difficult to believe that going bare automatically makes women like their genitals more or have better sex. We think it’s more likely that women who are more into how their genitals look perhaps want to show them off, by taking it all off from time to time. Or maybe women who are highly into sex and who have arousing, satisfying, and perhaps more adventurous or experimental sex lives are more likely to be daring with their pubic hair, such as taking it all off. More research is needed to better understand how women’s pubic hairstyles relate to the rest of their sex lives.

Perhaps the most important take-home message from this study is that—contrary to what we sometimes see in the media about there being one dominant pubic hairstyle for women—women do all kinds of different things to their pubic hair. Some do nothing. Some trim their hair. Others shave the sides off or shave it into shapes, such as a heart or a star. Some women shave or wax all of it off, or opt for electrolysis or laser methods to permanently reduce how much hair they have. As far as we’re concerned, this is great news, as it means that there’s no “standard” that women should feel pressured to live up to when it comes to their hair. Just as women’s labia come in all sorts of shapes, sizes, and colors, pubic hairstyles are diverse, too.

We weren’t the only ones that were excited about this finding from our study. After our study was published, numerous writers from women’s magazines and blogs called us to ask about the study so they could share our results with their readers. Many of these writers thanked us for conducting the study and said that they, too, were tired of media articles that made it seem like every woman on the planet was as bare as a baby down there. Not that there’s anything wrong with being bare—there’s not, as far as we’re concerned. But there’s something really nice about finding out how individual we all are, and that more women than we may realize are bucking the so-called trends and doing whatever the heck they want down there.

WEARING YOUR HAIR

Now that we’ve talked about what other women do with their pubic hair, let’s talk about you and your pubic hair. What follows are some basic tips for each type of style listed—just in case you’re thinking about switching things up down there.

Going Natural

This is exactly what it sounds like. When you go natural, you don’t trim, shave, wax, or engage in any kind of removal. Some women naturally have very little hair, whereas others boast a full natural “bush” that could stand up to even the wildest merkin on the market.

Advantages
No maintenance is required—just wash and air dry, and you’re all set. Plus you may have hairs that are long enough to decorate with little ribbons or even braid. There are no side effects to going natural, and it’s free! It’s also coming back in style, albeit with a new name—the Retro Bush.

Disadvantages
You may find yourself in a bit of a pickle in swimsuit season; if you don’t want the world to see your pubes, you may want to opt for a “boy short” swimsuit bottom. If you’re okay flashing your hairs, like Miranda does in the
Sex and the City
movie, go for it! There’s nothing wrong with going natural. Also, sexual partners of women with long or bushy pubic hair may find it more difficult to perform oral sex on them (then again, some people like a challenge, so this isn’t a disadvantage for everyone).

Trimming

This is perhaps one of the most common forms of pubic hairstyling that men engage in, but it’s also common among women. Tip: small scissors are often easier to maneuver than larger “craft” or kitchen scissors. Plus, no one wants pubes in kitchen scissors that may later be used on food items.

Advantages
Easy to do on your own and only needs to be done once every week or so to keep hair length in check. Trimming hairs can make it easier for partners to perform oral sex. There’s also no risk of razor burn or chemical irritation and nothing to buy except for scissors (not a bad initial investment).

Disadvantages
Be careful not to cut yourself (rare, but it happens). There are also similar swimsuit considerations as noted in the “going natural” category.

Shaving

Many women choose to shave their pubic hair, especially if they prefer to not have pubic hair sticking out the sides of their underwear or bathing suits. You may get a closer shave using a double-edged razor blade. Some disposable razors come with soft lotion-strips to soften the skin post-shave. Shaving in the direction of hair growth can reduce the risk of razor burn (this is opposite to the direction that many women use to shave their legs).

Advantages
Inexpensive. You can do it yourself. Relatively easy to do once you get the hang of which direction to shave. Razors are also portable, so you can continue to shave while traveling.

Disadvantages
Hair can grow back quickly, which means you may be left with stubble or find yourself having to shave often (e.g., every day or so) to avoid stubble. Many women also find that they get razor burn or are prone to in-grown hairs as a result of shaving.

Depilatories

Depilatories are made of chemicals that remove hair. They come in different forms including gels, lotions, creams, and roll-on devices. Not all depilatories are recommended for use in the genital area, so read any instructions or package inserts to make sure that you are using it correctly.

Advantages
Relatively inexpensive, you can do it yourself, and hair removal may be longer lasting than it is with shaving, leaving a smooth hair-free feeling.

Disadvantages
Some women are prone to irritation from chemicals commonly found in depilatories. You may want to do a skin test first (on another part of the body, such as your leg or inner arm), as is often recommended in the instructions that come with depilatories. Also, avoid using depilatories on skin that is inflamed or broken, such as if you have razor burn or sores.

Waxing

Pubic hair waxing has become increasingly popular over the past decade or so. Many full-service hair salons now offer bikini area waxing. There are also many waxing-specific salons, particularly in major cities such as New York (Completely Bare), San Francisco (Stript), and Chicago (The Waxing Room).

Advantages
Because waxing involves pulling the hair out at the root, it lasts longer than shaving or depilatories. The area that was waxed may feel smooth for one or more weeks following a treatment. There’s also no risk of razor burn.

Disadvantages
The cost is moderate to expensive (the more hair removed, the more expensive). Also, the wax irritates some women’s skin. Oh, and it can hurt like hell—especially the closer one gets to the inside parts of the outer labia. Plus, the terms can be confusing. For example, some salons describe a Brazilian wax as leaving a small “landing strip” of hair and a “Hollywood” as going completely bare. But when many other salons list “Brazilian,” they’re referring to removing every last hair. Our advice? Ask questions! Be specific with the aesthetician about what you do or do not want removed. (All the hair on top? What about the hair on your labia? What about the hair in your butt crack? Yes, some wax jobs go there . . . Be prepared to get awfully cozy with your aesthetician.) Finally, one often needs at least a couple weeks of hair growth in order to have hair that’s long enough to wax off, so get ready to grow before you go.

VAJACIALS

A few years ago, Stript wax bar founder Katherine Goldman started offering vajacials in her Bay Area salons—essentially, treatments for women’s vulvas about a week following their full Brazilian waxes.
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The treatment is meant to care for women’s skin and includes a warm wash, exfoliation, extractions (removal of ingrown hairs), and a mask that may include an antifreckle agent, an antibacterial agent, or a calming solution. The vajacial is finished off with a lightening treatment to even out skin tone. Last time we checked, it cost about $60. Though vajacials have gotten a lot of press (after all, they are yet another way for the vulva to become trendy!), we haven’t seen any signs that would suggest they’re sweeping the nation. Over the past few years, it’s seemed as though inventing new words that start with VA and have something to do with women’s sexy parts (e.g., vajazzling, vajacial, vatooing, vajayjay) has been enough to get a lot of traction in the blogosphere.

Sugaring

Sugaring is an all-natural method of hair removal. The “sugaring” paste is often made with ingredients such as sugar, lemon juice, and water (though salons may vary). Also called “sugar waxing,” although technically, there shouldn’t be any wax involved, at least not with the traditional Middle Eastern methods we are familiar with.

Advantages
A greater hair-covered area can be sugared off at once than with waxing. As such, sugaring may not take as long. Sugaring can be less painful than waxing (Debby tried this once years ago and concurs). You can also try mixing up your own sugar paste with recipes and instructions found online (you may want to try non-genital areas, such as your legs, before you experiment with sugaring your pubic hair).

Disadvantages
Sugaring hasn’t taken off everywhere, so it can be difficult to find a salon that offers this service (some salons mix sugar with their wax and call it sugaring, but this is not the same). In salons, the cost is moderate to expensive, often close in price to waxing. Also, as with waxing, you often need at least a couple of weeks of hair growth in order to have enough length to sugar off.

Electrolysis

Electrolysis sounds more science fiction than salon, but it’s been a common method of hair removal for years. It involves having a trained professional use a needle device (called an “epilator”) or a tweezer epilator to send electric current to the hair root. It’s meant to destroy the hair follicle so that hair won’t grow back.

Advantages
When it works, it can result in permanent hair removal (or at least a reduction in the amount of hairs).

Disadvantages
Electrolysis can be expensive and require a series of treatments (home electrolysis kits are available but not often recommended). And it can be painful. Also, it sometimes doesn’t work (the electric current may miss or not be enough), and the hair grows back. There are also risks of scarring, infection, and electric shock (the latter is uncommon but possible), and not all states require electrologists to be licensed.